Chapter 10

TEN

"Chris," Alex hissed as he tugged William into the house, doing his best not to smack his friend's head into a wall. Emma was behind them, her breathing loud and rapid as they moved inside quickly.

Everything was still a fucking blur, but William getting dragged away was the fuel he'd needed to overcome odds. Alex wouldn't lose a unit member. He'd unloaded every bullet in his gun and another clip before realizing he'd shot every opposing man.

"You still good?" He glanced at Emma who hadn't said a word the entire five-mile race back.

"I don't know how to answer that." She whispered, her eyes filling again with tears.

"What the fuck happened?" It was Bash who snarled at the top of the stairs.

"There were raiders. We're all fine, but Will took a big smack to the head and has been down since. His pupils reacted to a flashlight when I checked him in the truck, but he's gotta rest this one out until his system reboots. "

"He's not a damn computer," Liam hissed, reaching for William. "I'll get him to a bed and monitor him. You go do whatever Chris expects you to do with Emma." To himself, he kept muttering something that sounded like blaming himself for wanting to train Emma.

"Do you need a break?" Alex's heart only now began to return to a normal rhythm. He knew she wasn't okay, but damn if she wasn't brave as fuck acting like she was after helping him drag William out and across the lot before someone else found them.

She nodded, wiping at her eyes. "There's no time for me to not be ready. I swear this day is longer than when the fucking bombs hit." Her eyes closed, and she blew out a slow breath. "How do you guys do this?"

"Well, it's not always this exciting."

"Oh, no?" Her eyes narrowed with disbelief. "When's the last time something like this happened?"

Alex bit the inside of his cheek. He could be honest and tell her about Bash's injury a month ago, but he didn't think she'd appreciate knowing just how much danger she was walking around in.

"So, this was just another day for you?"

He shrugged. "We're a military unit, Emma. We're literally in the business of putting ourselves in danger to get the job done."

"Teach me. Hopefully it's less of a lesson than what just happened."

"You're certain you don't need a little bit?"

"It's barely two in the afternoon. If I stop now, I'll have all afternoon before I can sleep and get those images out of my head."

He nodded. She's more scared than she's let on. She's one hell of a survivor.

"Some of this may not be new skills for you, but at the end of the day, if you can't fix yourself, you may be a sitting duck." Alex cleared his throat when her brows furrowed together. "First aid," he said, his voice low and commanding, "is just as important as self-defense." He gestured for her to join him on a nearby crate. "In this world, knowledge is your best weapon. I can fix a car, and I can fix most injuries. Both of those things make me a candidate to survive if I'm ever separated from the unit. I can't teach you machines in a few hours, but I can teach you some basic first aid."

Emma huddled close, her scent a beguiling mix of sweat and soap, clouding Alex's senses. Sure, he'd joked with Chris that morning, but he never dreamed of actually being with Emma. Most women would run screaming at the concept of five men sharing her, and he wouldn't blame her. It was an insane idea, but they were a unit and nothing would split them apart.

He cleared his throat, pushing aside the unbidden arousal.

"We're going to practice wound cleaning and bandaging," he said, retrieving the first aid kit from his pack. "Pay close attention and make sure you keep the one you took from your basement close. It'll be hard to find solid leaves in this climate to make suitable dressings."

As Alex guided her through the motions, his hands on her smaller ones, he couldn't help but admire her focus, her innate care. The way she tended to the dummy as if it were a living, breathing being spoke volumes about her character. "It's not just about the wound," he said, responding to her unasked question. "Empathy, compassion, these are the real skills."

Emma looked at him, her eyes deep pools of understanding, reflecting the raw emotion in his own. "You've lost someone too, haven't you? You all have."

Alex's cocky facade shattered, revealing the vulnerable man beneath. "My whole damn platoon," he confessed, gripping the edge of the crate. "I'm all that's left of the original group I was with. And I wasn't with them long. Otherwise, no, the bombing didn't take anyone from my life."

Emma's touch was gentle and supportive. It reminded him of his mother, which was strange because he certainly didn't think of his mother the way he'd thought of Emma when shit got bad back there. Thoughts he wasn't certain he could share with the others because she was off limits as their mission. "You're your own family now," she said, squeezing his shoulder. "You need each other to survive."

"You never asked me what I did before this." Alex ignored the way it had bothered him that she'd asked Will, but not him.

"I just assumed you were a mechanic of some sort."

He snorted. "Guess I better work on the vibes I give off. I was a paramedic in Los Angeles. The things I saw were nothing compared to the injuries when the bombs kept dropping that first month."

"How did you get to be with the others?"

"All medics were rounded up and immediately paired with units. Doctors and nurses were left at hospitals for a bit, but even they were drafted to groups or bases when the damage began to grow exponentially. My parents hate it, but they're safe on a base down south, so I won't ever leave even if shit hits the fan."

"So . . . you fixing the microwave?"

"It's just a random skill I have from the old life. I'm pretty good with an oil change, too, if I do say so." He tried to lighten the mood, not because Emma seemed upset, but because he didn't want to think about the unit he had lost.

The unit he had was what mattered now.

"And this?" Emma tapped the brotherhood tattoo on the back of his hand. "I assume you all have them, but I've only noticed yours, Liam's, and William's."

Alex couldn't help the smile that slipped over his lips.

"You noticed them."

She nodded. "They're not large, but they still stand out."

"We did them ourselves. About eight months after we were put together. Just sort of decided we needed something to keep us as a unit. Together." Alex ran his hand over the back of his neck. Suddenly uncomfortable with the subject.

"Who did them? I would've thought tattooing was long gone."

"Oh, it is." He glanced backward to see if anyone was there to help him out. "We did them ourselves." He extended his arm so she could see it better. "Our initials."

"And why the star?" Emma looked down at his wrist, her fingers gently tracing over the homegrown tattoo.

As her fingertips grazed his skin, a rush of desire flooded through him, commanding his attention. Despite the gentle and tantalizing touch, he fought to ignore it, knowing it could lead him down a path of reckless abandon. His limbs trembled with the effort of restraint as he focused on anything but the intoxicating sensation spreading through his body.

"Because we point each other home, like the north star."

"How much death have you seen?" The question was barely louder than a whisper and Alex had to look up to make certain she'd really asked it as her fingers stopped touching his arm.

"Before or after?" Alex tried not to let the images flood his mind.

Alex's hands shook as he reached for the water bottle on the crate next to him. Emma watched him with concern, but she didn't say anything. They were both quiet for a few moments, lost in their thoughts.

Emma's eyes were gentle but insistent. "Both," she said quietly.

Alex took a deep breath and closed his eyes briefly, trying to push back the memories that threatened to overwhelm him. "Before . . . I saw plenty," he said, his voice tight with emotion. "But nothing like what came after."

"How much in the after? All right after the bomb or do you mean picking up the pieces?"

He opened his eyes and looked at her directly. "More than anyone should ever have to see," he admitted, his voice cracking slightly.

She reached out and took his hand in hers, offering silent support. He was grateful for it, more than he could express in words.

"I'm sorry," Emma said softly, squeezing his hand gently.

"I'm sorry, too," Alex replied, meeting her gaze with intensity. "For everything you've had to endure. For everything we've all had to endure."

She squeezed his hand again, and this time, when Alex stared into her hazel eyes, he swore he saw an invitation in them.

You're being silly. You want there to be one. It's been ages since you've been with anything and Emma is exceptional.

Alex wouldn't risk scaring her off. She'd learn some basic skills, but what happened back at the gas station was enough to show her she couldn't really be on her own without her house.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Alex asked softly, wondering if they'd reached a level of trust where she could explain her life before they came.

"No," Emma said firmly, shaking her head. "I don't want to burden you with my problems when we have a mission to focus on. I have somewhere to be, after all."

"Talking can help sometimes," Alex offered gently.

Emma smiled sadly and looked away for a moment before returning her gaze to him. "I know. But not right now."

Alex nodded, because he understood. When they'd spent more time together, she would open. She was the same as he was, he could tell just by this small conversation.

And the way that dog follows her everywhere.

"William woke up and then went back to sleep." Bash appeared in the doorway, leaning with one hand on the top and his shoulder pressed against the right side. "Alex, Chris wants you up there to check on him. Liam's got the basics, but you'll be the best to watch if something goes wrong."

Relief washed over him. Yes, he'd checked William on the drive back, but knowing he'd been conscious was a fucking load off. The entire trip back all Alex had done was blame himself for not seeing the guy lumbering toward William.

But he's been awake, he'll be fine. Shit happens.

"Ya, okay." Alex gave Emma a small smile. "We can continue this while we drive tomorrow." Alex started moving toward the kitchen and the stairs but stopped and leaned his lips close to Bash's ear. "Don't push her too hard. She saw everything."

"Bash grunted and crossed his arms over his chest. "Then that's all the reason to push her until she can handle herself."

Alex started to tell Bash off and stopped. He was right. There was going to be a time and a place when Emma would be safe and cherished.

Their job was just to get her there.

"You think you're up for this?" Bash might have told Alex he wouldn't hold back, but he wasn't an asshole.

If Emma was spooked, she was spooked and wouldn't handle this well. She couldn't learn to protect herself if she started to shut down during the training.

"I don't know."

"Okay then," Bash didn't really know what not knowing meant for the next steps. It had been so long since he'd had to be careful around anyone he couldn't help but feel he was going to do it wrong.

"It's been a really long day, and it's barely evening."

"I understand."

"You're going to give up just like that?" She curled a brow.

"You want me to be some sort of caveman and force you into something?" Bash took a step closer. "You were just involved in an attack. An attack that left my brother unconscious. You can't tell me that didn't affect you."

"Of course it did!" Emma hissed, her eyes narrowing. "But that's the problem, isn't it? I had no idea what to expect when I took a chance on that radio. Barely two days in and I've caused someone to get hurt because they wanted to help me survive better."

Her chest rose and fell rapidly, and Bash could tell Emma was on the verge of either a panic attack or a rage-fueled venting session. He was here for either but needed to know which path she was about to go down.

"So, what are you supposed to teach me?"

"How to defend yourself."

"You're late. Chris did that and I couldn't fucking help William."

The curse sounded odd coming past her lips, but Chris shouldn't have been surprised. She'd just been so docile in their overnight together.

"Chris taught you how to attack."

"And I tried to run at someone and got slammed backward into a shelf."

A wave of panic surged through Bash, causing his heart to race and his hands to shake. Without thinking, he instinctively reached out and grabbed Emma's wrist, pulling her close to him. His voice was filled with concern as he asked, "Are you hurt? Why didn't you say anything?" The rush of adrenaline coursing through his body made it difficult for him to focus on anything else at that moment. His only priority was making sure Emma was unhurt.

"It seemed a little more important that William get the help he needed. I'll be a little bruised, but I'm fine. Scared more than anything. All these years…"

Tears filled her eyes as her words just fell off.

Bash wrapped his arms around Emma, tugging her close before he even realized what he had done. His strong arms couldn't ignore the trembling racking through Emma. He didn't want to push her away, he wanted to pull her closer and make certain she was never in harm's way again.

All he wanted was to shield her from any harm, to be her unwavering protector.

Which is incredibly na?ve and not in the cards. But he didn't pull away. No, he held perfectly still under the panic that ran its course until Emma grew still in his hold.

"I'm sorry." She looked up at him through wet lashes.

"Sometimes we all need to get things out. Don't be sorry just because I was an ass the other night. I'm not uncaring."

She nodded and shifted her weight, signaling she wanted to create some space. Bash released her so she wasn't uncomfortable, but the emptiness in his arms was hard to ignore.

"Teach me. Chris taught me how to punch and kick. Can you teach me how to get away?"

He didn't speak, but stepped away, shoving the couch against the back wall. He could take them outside, but there'd been enough danger for one day.

"Alright then," he began gruffly, "let's see whatcha got." His voice was rough and commanding. "Come for me, and I'll see what you instinctively do to get away when I retaliate.

Emma walked cautiously toward Bash, and his muscles twitched to protect her, not attack her.

She stood before him, their breaths mingling in the close quarters of the room filled with anticipation. If he was going to help her, he needed to get over himself.

Reaching out slowly, Bash ran one hand through her curly hair before gripping it firmly at the base of her scalp and pulling it back hard enough to make her gasp. She went to her knees, but when he didn't follow, her yelp was enough to sink his stomach .

"Make me let go." he ground the words out as she twisted and likely caused herself more pain.

Emma's hands slammed against his thigh, then against his stomach. As her elbow raised to slam into his crotch, but Bash jumped backward, putting distance between them.

He stared unflinchingly into her eyes even though the pain he caused her threatened to drown him. It felt like an invasion of privacy but also a sign of trust between them—a bond forming amidst this chaos they found themselves in.

"Now you know what it feels like when someone grabs you against your will," he growled lowly. "You gotta be ready for anything." Offering her his hand, Bash ignored the wave of hurt when she stood up on her own. "Your instincts weren't wrong, but never drop to the ground if they already have you.

When she stood, he took his next chance to see what she could do. His hands gripped her wrists tightly as he pulled them behind her back roughly.

"Break free. Think before you move. If I can see a move coming, so will an attacker."

Though she was still, she flexed a little in his grasp, the motion slight under his hands. A second later she went limp, her body dropping to the floor even though he'd warned her not to do that a minute ago.

"Emma, that won't work."

She didn't respond.

"Emma, I'm not playing a game right now."

Again no response. A weight dropped onto his chest and Bash loosened his hold just a little to check on her. She didn't move as he lifted her.

Without hesitation, she swung her elbow with all her might, connecting with his groin in a sharp and satisfying impact. The act sent a wave of bright light over his senses, despite the training he had undergone .

Emma jerked her arm free and stood with a smirk on her face.

Two could play that game.

Bash doubled over, playing up how much pain he was in, expecting her to come in closer so he could make certain she would never make that mistake with an attacker.

"Nope, not buying it."

Bash looked up and dropped the act, surprised that she could be so callous.

"Though I am really sorry."

Chuckling, he gave himself a quick adjustment, the pain already subsiding. "Never apologize. Nice trick, but it relies on the person having a sense of decency."

"Then make sure I can do it another way."

A smile spread over his lips. "That's what I want to hear."

Bash grabbed her from behind, his hands wrapping over her shoulders, allowing his fingers to bite into her skin just enough to make it harder for her to escape but not cause pain.

"Now, you're going to make a fist with your right hand. Hold tight and move like you want to back hand me. Put as much power behind it as you can. The goal is to shake me off as best as possible so you can run."

Emma was still for a moment, and Bash wondered if she was afraid or calculating something, and then he felt her tense under his right hand.

In one swift movement, she twisted her body toward him, desperately trying to break free from his grasp. But instead of releasing her, he pulled her closer, their bodies pressing tightly together. The sudden friction sent a surge of electricity through Bash's veins, instantly sharpening his senses and intensifying the moment.

This woman awoke a fire in him, and if she weren't careful, he wasn't going to be able to stop himself from testing the waters.

"Not that way," he cleared his throat and ignored how perfect her body felt against his. "That is going to do nothing but turn your attacker on—which is not what you want."

She gasped and went rigid in his arms. "Not my intention."

"Right, because if you do that, a man—and even a woman—is going to get riled up more than they already were."

"Right," she whispered back at him. "And I for sure don't want to do that," her hand trailed down his body as she spoke.

Bash damn near came in his pants as she cupped around his length.

"Emma, you're playing with more fire than you can handle. That's not the tactic to try, and unless you're actively looking for me to bury myself in your body, you need to stop because . . . fuck."

"Sorry," her hand immediately pulled away. "I just thought it might work."

"It could work. If you're willing to fuck someone and escape when they're sated and sleepy. I'd rather you not." Bash closed his eyes and blew out a slow breath, trying to right the desire coursing through him. "Let's try it again." Spinning her, Bash set his hands on her shoulders. "Now."

"Okay," she said, taking a deep breath and trying to focus on the task at hand.

Bash nodded and stepped back, giving her some space. "Remember, you're not trying to seduce your attacker. You're trying to incapacitate them and escape."

"Right," she said, nodding determinedly.

She tensed and twisted, her fist connecting with just a small section of his chin. He didn't flinch, and she jerked her arm again, raising her knee. Unfortunately for Emma, Bash caught the movement out of the corner of his eye and jumped back.

"You are very intent on taking a man's manhood. I might need it one day to help save the population."

"It's how I was trained as a teen. "

"Not entirely surprising. Men are different now, you could get lucky, but not likely."

How do I approach this in a way that gives her the best chance?

Bash mulled over all the different scenarios in his mind, stopping twice with the same tactic.

"We're going to switch it up. It's not to say I don't want you to get better with the other —we'll practice—but this is more likely to happen." He moved quickly, stepping behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist, quickly hoisting her into the air.

She stilled immediately.

"No, never get stiff. Dead weight isn't heavy enough when you're so small. Thrash and kick and punch. But not right this second."

"Then what do you want me to do?" A slight hint of annoyance rang out with the words.

"Men are most likely going to try to steal you away before doing anything else. Grabbing you, and tossing you over their shoulder is going to be the most likely tactic." Bash set her down. "When that happens, you're going to drop into a squat, it's like dead weight, but bulkier. When you're there, you need to slam your heel as close to the person's instep as you can. Assuming they don't have steel-toe boots, that will give you a chance to slam your elbow either into their solar plexus or their ribs."

"That's … a lot of information."

"Which is why we're going to practice it. A lot." Bash clapped his hands together. "Begin."

Over and over the drill played out. Most times, Emma either missed his instep or missed jamming her elbow into him.

But not all.

"Okay, let's take a quick break before we start again." He moved into the kitchen to grab some bottled water, his mind moving over what they could do next .

Emma wasn't as clumsy as Chris made it sound after his training session with her.

Did Chris make her nervous?

As big as he was, Chris would be intimidating, but he was a lamb when it came to women.

"Here," Bash passed over an opened bottle before cracking his open.

"Thanks," she murmured between sips.

As Bash turned away, he couldn't help but feel a surge of pride for Emma. She might be clumsy and inexperienced now, but she had potential—a spark that could be honed into something deadly. Something they all needed in this brutal world where survival often depended on quick thinking and decisive action. He watched her practice the moves with Liam, the sounds of their heavy breaths and panting filling the small space. The scent of sweat mixed with dirt and determination as they pushed themselves to the limit.

He could see it in her eyes. Emma was scared, but her fear only fueled her fire. And when she finally got it right, Bash experienced an unexpected rush of adrenaline that made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. It was as if, for a moment, she transformed into someone else entirely—strong, unbroken, fierce. It was intoxicating.

"You're doing okay, but I need you to reach down and find the fire I can see in your eyes. That fire is going to help save you far more than our training. You have to want to survive."Bash cleared his throat, coming back to the present. "Now, this move here..." His hand gripped her wrist tightly, and he used brute force to show her how to break free from a simple hold. The sound of bone-on-bone as she mimicked his movements was terrifyingly real. He could hear the soft grunt that escaped her lips as she tried and failed to match his strength. "Again." His voice rumbled, deep and commanding .

She nodded quickly, her eyes watering slightly from the pain, but determination flashed brighter in them. The smell of sweat and determination filled the air as they practiced, the sun beating down on their skin.

Dropping down to take a breath, Bash and Emma sat together, sharing a moment of silence.

Everything about her seemed to riddle his head with confusion, but nothing more so than the way sweat seemed to cling to her, emphasizing her cleavage in the now see-through, sweaty tank top.

Beauty wasn't everything, but it sure did something to a man's otherwise silent desires. Knowing that she was determined to not only survive but help humanity by turning herself in for breeding … She was something far more special than he realized.

No, Bash had thought she'd change her mind and stay in her basement. Instead, she chose to give up everything except her dog, giving them a better life while she took the risk of a lifetime. She looked the storm in the eye and screamed back at it. Which is far more than most did once they realized humanity was doomed about a year after the bomb dropped.

"I'm sorry for the way I treated you when we first met," he finally said, looking away. "Kathleen..." His voice trailed off, the memory of his lost love still raw.

"It's okay," Emma whispered, hazel eyes welling with understanding. "We've all lost so much." Impulsively, she leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek, her lips lingering a moment too long.

Bash's heart skipped a beat. The simple, innocent yet intimate act awakened something in him, a spark of hope long extinguished. He looked into her bright eyes, and for a fleeting moment, he saw a flicker of the woman she might have been in another life.

"You guys done beating each other up?" Liam's voice floated from somewhere in the house, breaking up the silence and the tension.

"We can do more another time. I swear to you, we'll do everything in our power to make sure you never need any of this. Even when you get to the safe place, if you ever feel unsafe, we'll get you right out of there."

The words came out without warning—or thought.

As did the quick press of her lips to his.

Bash couldn't believe what had just happened. Emma's lips lingered, and the heat from her breath seemed to seep into his skin. He was frozen, unable to move or speak as he processed the sudden intimacy between them.

Emma pulled away slowly, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "I-I'm sorry," she stammered, looking anywhere but at him. "I don't know what came over me."

"It's okay," Bash managed to say, still feeling dazed. "I-I guess we just got caught up in the moment."

They both sat there in silence for a few moments, neither one knowing what to say. The tension between them was thick, and Bash could feel his heart racing in his chest.

Liam burst into the room. "Wow," he said, raising an eyebrow at the two of them sitting so close together. "Did I interrupt something?"

Bash and Emma quickly jumped apart, both blushing furiously. Liam let out a low whistle before shaking his head with a grin.

Liam held up his hands in mock surrender. "Fine, fine. Just remember we have work to do." With that, he left them alone once again.

Bash took a deep breath and turned to look at Emma beside him. She was still avoiding his gaze and fiddling with her fingers nervously.

"I-I really am sorry for kissing you like that," she said finally, barely above a whisper.

"Don't be," Bash replied softly. "It's not every day someone kisses me." They both let out a small laugh at that.

"I just wanted you to know that I appreciate everything you're doing for us," Emma said, her eyes finally meeting his.

Bash couldn't believe the way his heart seemed to beat faster for the first time in years.

"It's what we do. Come on, let's get you some rest. Tomorrow's going to be a big day."

"Seems like that's the second time you've said that to me."

"Ya, but this time I'm not going to keep being a dick."