Chapter 23

23

ROMAN

T he scream exploding from my chest surprised me. Guttural, the kind to curdle blood and shatter glass. I surged forward, diving into the path of the bullets.

Useless. I had no physical form to stop them as Ismael emptied the weapon into Xavier. His limbs flailed, the force of the impact sending him into a crazy dance, turning his body into lace.

I grabbed for him, screaming, as powerless as I'd been since Butterfly stuck me with the dagger.

The final bullet was the magic one, hitting Xavier between the eyes. His white orbs seemed to fracture like marbles smashed into concrete, black blood oozing down his face.

"Xavier!" My arms moved through him as I pleaded with every god to grant me the power to do something.

He fell backwards. Everything around me stopped, Xavier under a spotlight of horror. Nothing else existed apart from his second death. I tried to breathe, to summon my inner fires to stop this.

They fizzled to nothing, the swords of grief stabbing at me in every direction.

"I didn't get to tell you…" My voice barely made a sound, my throat closing over my words.

This can't be happening again…

Before Xavier's body hit the floor, Butterfly's dust swarmed him, clinging to him like iron filings on a magnet. It shimmered across his skin, wrapping every inch of him in golden light.

A surge of hope stole my breath. The dust would save him. Here came a new twist to this tale—a good one where I got to crash into Xavier's arms and finally confess those three words to him.

He exploded, the force sending me flying across the street. I shot through a wall, pulling off a backflip in the empty ice cream shop.

Immediately, I hurried back outside. High on adrenaline, fresh waves of grief held at bay for the time being. They didn't get to drown me just yet because this wasn't over. This wasn't real. This was all just another bead of horror on a string of bullshit.

Everything will be okay.

Xavier was gone. In his place sat a doorway cut into the air. Jagged around the edges, its center an iridescent gold. The dust around it parted like a curtain, falling at a slanted angle as if to avoid it.

Weird.

Xavier…

"What is this?" Ismael said.

"Be careful, Your Majesty," Butterfly warned.

The king ignored him, moving closer to the door at the same time as me. We walked almost in sync, both of us confused.

"Where did he go?" Ismael asked me.

"No idea."

Tanith hurried over. "With all due respect, My King, I would advise you not to?—"

"Be quiet!" he snapped at her.

She bowed, stepping back.

The doorway gave none of its secrets away. I saw zilch on the other side, just lots of pretty gold sparkles.

"Xavier?" I said at the same time as Ismael.

We looked at each other, the two loves of the spider demon acting like perfectly timed puppets on the same strings.

His love. I was Xavier's love…

And you are mine…

The king and I stopped close to the doorway, heavy silence from those behind us.

"What do you believe lies beyond?" Ismael asked me.

"No idea. Why don't you stick your head inside?"

He smiled. "My beheading would please you greatly."

Hell to the yes!

I shrugged, fighting the heavy sorrow crushing my shoulders.

He's dead. He's your dead love. The guy you never got to tell. The future never meant to be yours.

Man, the malignant grief really didn't let up. It wanted me to crumble like a damn biscuit.

To my surprise, Ismael stepped through the doorway. Tanith called his name, running forward.

"No!"

Butterfly joined her, the jar of time back in his possession. Damn it!

I held his gaze for a moment, then followed the king inside. Without any answers to hand, and the persistent hopelessness ready to drag me down, I let my curiosity take over. Reckless? Maybe. But Xavier exploding like that happened for a reason in a reality rapidly losing its equilibrium.

My God, my head was proper spinning.

I passed through blazing gold light, the temperature shifting from chilly to balmy. My eyes took a moment to adjust, and then every puzzle piece fell into place.

My breath caught in my throat, my knees buckling. I went down with gravity onto the grass of Grandma's front garden.

Grandma. She was here with the teenage me. As radiant as I remembered her. The smells of her baking wafting from the open door of the house, the stunning flowers and expertly cut lawn—her garden that was her pride and joy.

There was her bench for summer days where she would do her crosswords. I joined her a lot of the time, the two of us sharing a cold glass of lemonade. At Christmas time, the garden transformed into a winter wonderland. Extra festive ornaments, lights, all that good stuff I missed so damn much.

I envied Teenage Me, wanting to be him again. To join with him, shut out this adult part of me and go back to being sixteen, if only for a little while.

"Grandma…" My vision blurred with tears. "Oh my God…"

"Roman?" Her voice. Her sweet, loving voice. I couldn't take it, the thing in my chest set to break.

"Is that really you?" she asked.

I sniffled, succumbing to my emotions. Sobbing my guts up on the grass. I heard my name spoken again, this time by Xavier and Darcy.

Wait. Wait. Wait. My brain took a few beats to catch up. I put up a dam against my waterworks.

My lover and my bestie were here, along with… Holy shit! No. That couldn't be right.

"Queen Margarite?" I got to my feet.

Before anyone could say anything else, I remembered the demon king and Butterfly beside me.

Everything started to click into place now. This was where I'd connected to Teenage Me. This was where I'd sent Xavier and Darcy. But the version of Xavier currently gaping at Ismael was a different one again.

Something wasn't right, everything even more tangled than before.

"What happened here?" Ismael said, taking a step back.

The door remained behind us.

"He exploded," my younger self answered, locking eyes with me. "Him." He pointed at Xavier. "The other him. Future him who came back here. He made that door when he went bang."

My Xavier exploded over here, too? Because he was connected to the meaner version at the time? Meaning this Xavier was the actual Xavier from this time.

My poor head.

I tried keeping my shit together under this insanity, reaching a numb state of mind to stop a system overload.

"Holy shit!" Young Me yelped. "You're me. You're me. You're me."

"Ismael?" Xavier whispered.

The king took another step back.

"A demon with a crown," Margarite said. Her guards closed in around her, creating a wall.

"Stay back!" one of them warned.

Every witch's hand, including Margarite's and Teenage Me's, ignited with Synth.

Ismael moved back once again, inching closer to the door. Magic still existed here, the dust not coming through the door. Which meant an ADU agent could banish a demon to the demon realm with a talisman like they used to be able to. Having proper walls up made that possible here.

Man, my brain was spaghetti. I knew things were in a meat grinder, but…whoa.

The device vibrated in my chest, the dagger shaking. It wanted out, drawn to…

…the younger me.

Huh?

Ismael noticed, backing off some more. "As fascinating as this is, I must leave you now." He turned and fled back through the door.

Oh, hell no. He wasn't going back there to gather his army for an across-time war. I ran after him, returning to the street in my time.

More demons filled the street, stepping out of strange bulges and ripples in the air. Every five seconds or so, another demon slipped through the weakening walls between the two realms.

Talk about a demonic variety show. There were kings, queens, big demons, small ones, totally fucked up ones—like the one made from metal and bulbous gray flesh, dragging a scorpion tail behind it.

Ismael and Butterfly moved to join the new arrivals, Tanith lingering near the door. The snake demon's tongue flickered at me, her mouth a triumphant grin.

She really shouldn't count those chickens yet.

Tanith let out an audible groan. "He's alive?"

Ismael didn't answer her, his attention on me.

There was more movement, Teenage Me arriving on my right-hand side, skidding to a stop. The magic in his hands fizzled out under the dust.

"Oh, fuck," he muttered.

The dagger in my chest tremored violently, grinding against my flesh and bone to be free. Sharp pains burst to life, sending bright spots behind my eyes. I grabbed at the handle, trying to make it stop as the agony reached white hot levels.

No one else, including me, could remove the dagger. But what about a different version of me?

"Take—"

"No!" Ismael roared, clocking on. "Kill the boy!"

The demons charged, Tanith slithering at Teen Me.

"Get out of here!" I yelled at myself.

Xavier grabbed him, flinging him over his shoulder and hurrying back through the door.

Teenage Me was the answer. He was the key to freeing me from this dagger. Once the blade was out, I could open the jar. That had to be the solution. Unless Butterfly came up with an alternative.

Hopefully, he'd be dead by then.

Demons ran through my body, vanishing into the door. Fuck. I followed.

"Roman!" Ismael barked.

I ignored him, dashing through the doorway. Queen Margarite's car was already speeding off, the remaining guards joined by ADU agents. Together they flung spells at the demons, a full-on battle going down in my grandma's garden.

Where were my people? I couldn't see them.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

A man with a slightly sun-burned look to him went from human to ten-foot giant with crab pincers in an instant, sporting a flurry of barnacles on his big chest.

The demon tower on the south end of this street blazed against the demonic presence, knocking many of them down. But it didn't seem to deter the fucker.

Crabby ran at my grandma's house, taking a chunk out of the roof with a pincer swipe. He roared with laughter, then took several more swings at the brickwork. Part of the roof collapsed, several of the windows obliterated.

I ran inside, calling out the names of those I loved. Heard no one, saw no one. Which meant they were running for their lives.

Thank God.

Don't thank him just yet!

Back outside, my senses were overwhelmed by the sounds, the smells, and the sight of my childhood home getting messed up. The witches gained the upper hand, as they always did. An ADU agent banished Crabby with a talisman. Scarlet flames ignited at his feet, quickly becoming a vortex. He bellowed Ismael's name before the flash of red light sent his arse to the demon realm.

Bye, bye now! Maybe he'd meet his past self and give the prick some advice.

Agents locked down the area, every eye trained to the shimmering doorway. Five more demons came through it, quickly subdued by the tower.

I dashed into the street, taking a moment to scan the area. Helicopters churned overhead, a bevy of ADU agents rocking up, but there was zero sign of my people.

"Grandma? Xavier?"

I jogged down the road, desperate for a sign. Footsteps followed me. I spun in a panic, suddenly remembering I had two followers.

"Take care, Shadow," Margarite said. "You must not burn out."

"Too late for that." I drew a quick breath. "Can you look for the others, please?"

She shook her head. "You must be restored."

"Seriously? You can't even do that?"

"Afraid not," Lizard Guy added.

Ugh. "Xavier? Darcy?"

Oh, God. Oh, God. What if Xavier was hurt? What if he got banished?

"Grandma?" She couldn't be far away. She'd kill me for saying it, but she wasn't exactly fast on her feet. This street was pretty long, her house in the middle of it. Surely I'd spot her. Unless the ADU had whisked her to safety.

Car lights came to life up ahead, Darcy sticking his head out of the window of a six-seater vehicle. "Get in!"

The back door opened. I jumped in, joining Darcy. Grandma was in the driver's seat, an injured woman—an ADU agent—in the front. She appeared to have a broken hand seeing as fingers weren't meant to be at those angles.

Ouch.

"Where's Xavier and young me?" I asked, my anxiety going through the stratosphere. I dug fingernails into my left palm, tapping my left foot.

"I gave him an address," Darcy responded. "We'll meet him there because he's quicker and that boy seems to be the key." He nodded at the blade in my chest. "Thought it best to get him into hiding quickly."

"Good thinking."

Margarite and Lizard Guy climbed over me into the two seats behind us as Grandma gunned the engine.

"But the towers…"

"He's fine. He cleared the street with no problems. It's all going to work out." He offered me a reassuring smile.

I really wanted to pull him into a hug. Hear him let out a ratty squeak under my crushing.

"I'm so sorry I killed you," I whispered. "I didn't mean it."

He chuckled. "Sounds so silly when you hear it out loud."

The car lurched, speeding off down the street.

"Hold on to your socks!" Grandma cried.

"Can you handle this?" I asked her, my mouth dry over seeing her again.

She threw me a mischievous grin and tore through the London streets like a racing driver.

"I've told you many times," she said, avoiding a red light. "Never underestimate me."

Point well taken.

For real this time.