Chapter 21

21

ROMAN

I saw Xavier on my doorstep. Not my flat, but my old house. Grandma's house from back in the day. I got the sense of a different body. A younger body.

Teenage me?

What the hell?

"How can you be there and in there?" I jutted a thumb behind me. "You…" I summoned Synth to my hands. "There's some dodgy shit going on."

Xavier folded his arms, unbothered by my magic. "Why did I see myself come to this house?"

"Because you are in this house." Xavier's voice came from behind me.

What is this? I thought.

Huh? my younger voice responded. Did I just say that?

You did. We did. Did we really? Oh. My. God.

Are you me? he asked.

Yeah. Adult you from the future, I answered. Well, the present. What's going on?

I think I need to lay down.

Later. What's happening?

"What is this?" the Xavier at the door said.

"We have to talk," the other Xavier said.

Teenage Me got talking.

He's alive? I said. The relief almost knocked me out.

Yeah. No thanks to us.

I hadn't killed him. For once in my existence, I hadn't taken a life. A sudden spike of giddiness threatened to floor me, to break me apart.

I didn't kill him.

I didn't kill him.

Oh my God…

Exactly, Teenage Me said. We got to fix this.

Which also meant Darcy was alive, maybe somewhere in this time scared out of his mind. Unless I'd sent him somewhere else.

What happens now? the younger me asked.

I don't know.

Helpful.

Give me a moment.

Yeah, yeah.

God, I could be one snippy little shit.

I heard that!

Good!

The connection broke, slamming me back into the present.

Man, the day this time-jumping stopped would make me one happy bunny.

Scratch the killing part. At least for the time being because I hadn't killed Xavier or Darcy, just put them somewhere else. What about their bodies, though. What?—

Fuck it. They were alive and that's all that mattered.

More giddiness flushed out some of the sorrow.

It did wonders for my hope.

We reached London without incident. I heard about other incidents across the world on the radio, and on Michelle's phone. So many headlines, demon attacks on the rise, many witch kings and queens declaring war.

King Basile's big speech had just finished. Flanking the French witch king were Queen Sophie and his demon lover, Phillipe. He tried to stress that war was not the way forward, making the case for humans and demons living together.

A nice dream, but not in the current context.

Michelle made a call as we pulled up outside a closed ice cream shop in Mill Hill. "We're here. Yes. No. I had no choice. Don't say that to me. What do you—" She groaned at the phone. "Idiot hung up on me. Says the deal is off."

"Why?" Eric questioned.

"Says we ran like a pair of cowards. Anyway, the queen isn't in the city anymore. Too dangerous."

I sat forward. "Call back."

She tried. No answer.

Michelle put her phone away, giving up. "She's right. We never should've run."

Fine. Whatever. With no patience to sit here, I got out of the car.

Michelle flung her door open. "What are you doing?"

"I'll find the queen myself." I stretched, my chest aching a little. "Even if I have to search every corner of this planet, I'll find her."

"Really?"

"I don't give up easily. There's too much at stake."

An ADU helicopter flew overhead in the direction of central London.

Keep on keeping on! I thought up at the agents.

"I'll do the same," I muttered, walking away from the car with my followers in tow.

"Wait!" Eric called. "Don't go alone."

"I'm not." I carried on, picking up my pace until movement stopped me in my tracks.

Fuck. Here came the next piece of poop.

Its white eyes burned in the dark, the rest of its body wreathed in shadows beyond the light of a lamppost.

The two agents joined me, guns drawn.

"Freeze!" Eric barked.

The demon held something in its right hand. Something bright. A small storm in a jar.

"Roman. I…" Xavier's voice knocked me for six.

"What the hell?"

Xavier stepped into the light, holding the jar of time.

I lost my balance, falling to my knees. The shock reached the device, sparks battering my ribcage.

"What happened?" Michelle cried.

It was one thing seeing Xavier alive yet trapped in the past with the younger version of me, but this hit differently. My eyes grew hot, relief and anguish colliding inside me, ready to come out in a banshee's scream.

"You're here," I managed to say instead of wailing.

"I'm not the correct Xavier, but I am here."

Anger dragged me back to my feet. "You're here?"

He came a step closer.

"We said freeze!" Michelle bellowed.

The past Ismael-loving Xavier seemed different. Kind of defeated, kind of sad, and maybe even chastised.

"I want to…help." His voice was a rasp, reflecting the confusion on his face. "I can't let him do this."

I moved closer, reaching a numbed state of mind. I was shocked to see him like this, but wary of him at the same time.

He's still Xavier…

"You left Ismael?" I asked.

His lips curled back into a snarl. "Because of you." He tapped his head with a finger. "You've tainted me." Hate flashed in his white eyes, his free hand now balled into a tight fist.

"Who is this demon?" Eric questioned.

"My lover."

"Your what?"

"I killed him and my best friend because of what's inside me." The words just fell out.

Somewhere inside this Xavier, his two hearts still called to me. Had he connected with his other selves? Did he feel what I felt looking at him?

"God…" I whispered.

Him being the meaner version of Xavier didn't change my desires. My feet itched to launch me into his arms. To kiss him, to sob every shred of relief into his chest. Seeing his face brightened my world, making the sun look like a low wattage lightbulb.

Xavier came closer, holding up the jar. "Make it right."

I took a few beats to pull myself together, every inch of my skin hot. "What if he's come after you?"

"I'll deal with him," he answered curtly.

"Can you trust him?" Michelle asked.

"I…" Did I? "We have to open that jar."

I moved closer to him, fear slowing my steps. If this was a trick, there wasn't a thing he could do. He'd already tried hurting me. But he could slaughter these agents.

"What changed your mind?" I asked.

"My love for you." He tried unscrewing the lid.

It didn't budge.

Typical.

"He loves you more than anything," Past Xavier continued. "I felt it when I connected to him. I hate that we love you, that Ismael isn't my one and only. But this is the way of things. My sweet Ismael died when he gave in to the darkness." He closed his eyes. "I cannot follow him into a blood-soaked life."

Man, that desire to hold him flared so strong. "Xavier…"

"Butterfly said he thinks the jar will open at the right moment, that all threads connect to you." He glowered at me. "Which makes you dangerous to Ismael." He shook his head. "His Majesty wants to destroy it. Butterfly kept trying to open it and came to this conclusion." He growled. "I really hate the purple-haired wanker."

"Wanker?" That was a word my Xavier used.

"Picked it up from…myself." He tapped the side of his head again.

I couldn't quite get there with trusting him. "What happens now?"

He raked a hand through that gorgeous platinum blond hair. "I'll join you. I can't go back to Ismael now."

There was movement at the dark edges of the street, soft laughter drifting toward us.

Goosebumps rippled across my skin, the hairs on the back of my neck standing to attention.

"No. You cannot come back to me, my love."

Oh shit.

Ismael was here.