Chapter 14

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

V ivian had left their mother's old BMW sitting on the street with the driver's side door open so Logan simply slid into the passenger seat as she raced around the front of the car and got in. His SUV was parked on a side street but it would be fine until he could return for it. He buckled his seatbelt as Vivian put the car in drive and practically peeled out.

He waited for his sister to say something, anything, but she was white-knuckling the steering wheel and breaking the speed limit so he figured now wasn't the time. Clearly she was upset which made sense given the circumstances, but he'd hoped she would give him a little more information on their mother's condition and their father's location.

He found it odd that Vivian hadn't said a word about the old man. She'd said she was looking for him. She'd said she came to find him when he hadn't answered his phone. But she hadn't said if their father was with their mom, if he was any worse now that his mate had taken a downturn, or if he even knew or cared.

When Vivian finally did speak, it wasn't at all what he'd expected from her.

"I guess all the research I've been doing on breaking a mate bond is useless now."

He blinked, "What? Why?"

"You're really going to ask me that?" She shot him a sideways glance. "I saw you two, Logan. When I walked into that office you were both red-faced and practically glowing, not to mention the smell of sex in the air. Pretty sure there's no breaking the bond now, big brother."

"We didn't…" He cleared his throat and his sister snorted. "The mate bond isn't sealed yet."

"You said yet."

"Yeah." His chest felt tight but he nodded. "I guess I did."

"So I was right. I can stop searching for a way to break an unsealed bond." Vivian sighed. "It would've been nice if you told me you weren't interested in breaking it anymore. I spent days in the pack library reading dusty old books when I could have been getting reacquainted with our pack or spending time with Mom."

The words inflicted the sting he knew she'd intended and he stared straight out the windshield, "I didn't know, not for sure. Hell, I'm still not sure we can make it work. She still hates me for what I can't tell her but the mating heat doesn't care about that."

"Is it just the heat driving you or do you actually feel something for her?" Vivian asked quietly and Logan blew out a rough breath.

"I don't know. I admire her for what she's overcome, for her strength and resilience. She's a fighter and she doesn't back down from a challenge. She's all fire and fury and it's sexy as hell." He caught Vivian shooting him a glance with eyebrows near her hairline and cleared his throat. "It's hard to know how much of that is the mating heat. Every time we're in the same room we end up arguing and fighting and then…"

"Don't finish that sentence." Vivian holding up a hand and cutting him off. "Please."

Logan groaned, Gladly. I don't want to talk about it. You're the one who brought it up."

"Because I was frustrated with you! First you say we have to leave town again so you can avoid the mating bond, then you decide we're staying but you want me to find a way to break the bond and now you're apparently accepting the bond despite all the reasons you yourself told me made it a bad idea. I'm trying to keep up, Logan, but I wish you'd make up your damn mind about what you want."

"I don't know what I want." he grumbled.

"Bullshit." She glared at him. "You know. You're just scared to want it because the last time you thought you knew what your life was going to be it all went to hell."

"That's not fair."

"Life rarely is. You taught me that."

Logan's throat felt tight and he stared at his sister as she turned up the driveway to the house, her eyes back on the road but her body still tense. He couldn't help but wonder for the millionth time if he'd made a mistake taking her away with him that night all those years ago. Maybe whisking her away from the only life she'd ever known had been unfair, maybe he'd sent her entire future veering off course and even if he'd thought he'd done it to protect her, he could acknowledge it had also been selfish. Because he hadn't wanted to be alone.

"I'm sorry Viv."

She shot him another glare, "Oh shut up."

"No, really, I'm sorry."

"Logan, I'm serious. I can't take your apologies or excuses or hear about your sudden epiphanies on life right now. Mom is dying and I promised her I'd get you to her before that happened. Just… just let me keep my promise, okay?"

"Okay." He nodded, hearing the break in her voice. He softened his tone, "Can you tell me what's happening with Mom?"

Vivian blew out a rough breath, "I was in my room getting dressed when Sunny rushed in. She told me Mom was awake and when I got excited she explained that it was likely one last surge before the end. It's a thing that happens, I guess. Patients on the verge of death sometimes have a last moment of lucidity where they seem to recover briefly before they die. I think I said something stupid, like I saw it on an episode of Grey's Anatomy, but I don't really know. I was just so happy Mom was awake and coherent."

"What about Dad? What did he say?"

"Nothing."

"Impossible."

"He doesn't know she's awake." Vivian shot him a sideways glance. "Sunny said Mom didn't want him to know. She said she only wanted to see us, that there was something she needed to tell each of us."

"And you already talked to her?"

"Yes."

"What did she say?"

Vivian chewed on her bottom lip, "That's between her and me. Sorry."

"So it's not the same thing she wants to tell me?" He frowned when his sister shrugged.

"I don't know. I just know she asked me to find you when I told her you'd already left for the day. She said it was important so I came to find you. I didn't even finish getting dressed, just tossed on some sandals, grabbed the keys from the hook and took off for town."

"And you think there's any way Dad didn't notice you racing out of the house?"

"He's never noticed me before." Vivian pulled into the circle drive and came to an abrupt stop. "But there's only one way to find out."

Vivian killed the engine and pushed her door open so Logan followed her lead and got out of the car. He jogged towards the house, not wanting to waste another minute. He stepped through the doorway and was immediately greeted with a scowling, red-faced, sickly-looking version of his father. He pulled up short to keep from running him over when he blocked the stairs and Vivian ran into his back.

"Move." Logan demanded but his father only sneered.

"You're not going up there."

"The hell I'm not."

"Your mother is dying. I'm trying to help you, son. You don't need to see that."

"You're the one she doesn't want to see and we all know why." Vivian snapped from over his shoulder and Byron growled at his daughter, but she wasn't the same scared little girl he remembered. "You did this to her. You made her sick and then you moved her to the guest room upstairs so you wouldn't have to watch her fade away. Well you got your wish because she doesn't want you anywhere near her."

"You don't know what you're talking about, little girl."

Logan stepped forward, putting himself right in his father's face, "I'm going up those stairs to see my mother before she passes on. You can move or I can move you. Your choice."

He steeled himself for a blow or at the very least more threats. His father stared at him for a tense moment but ultimately stepped aside. Logan's eyes widened in surprise but he took the win and pushed Vivian up the stairs ahead of him to keep her out of their father's firing line, just in case.

He noted the surrender and felt a surge of power that came with knowing his father's hold over them was lessening. He never would have stepped aside if he thought he could take Logan in a fight. Never. He wondered if it had something to do with the bond. If his mother was truly dying because of something her husband did then he hoped the old bastard could feel every ounce of fear and pain that she must be feeling as the end came for her.

At the top of the stairs, Logan paused, glancing down the hallway opposite his and Vivian's childhood room. The door to the guest room was shut but he knew what waited on the other side. He took a deep breath, trying to steel himself to see his mother again, knowing it would be the last time more than likely.

"You can do this." Vivian reassured him with a gentle squeeze on his shoulder.

"You're not coming in with me?"

She gave him a small, sad, smile, "No. I already spoke to her and said my goodbyes, just in case. It's your turn."

Logan swallowed hard but straightened his spine and reminded himself that he was a grown man now. He wasn't a child. He wasn't a teenage boy. He was the heir to the pack, the eldest son of the Alpha and the Queen. He could handle whatever it was she had to say to him because he had to. That was his birthright.

He opened the door slowly, pausing when he saw Sunny sitting by his mother's side again. The pretty blonde stood at the sight of him and moved towards him. She paused at his side and gave him an apologetic look.

"She's fading fast. I'm sorry."

His gut clenched, "Is she…"

"She's still awake but she's not as clear headed as she was earlier. She's short on breath so she speaks slowly and it doesn't always make sense." Sunny winced, "I'm sorry. I know you'd have liked to talk to her the way Vivian did but…"

When she trailed off Logan gave a brisk nod, "It's okay. I'll take whatever time I have left with her."

"She doesn't have much longer, Logan. I can sense that death is close." She gave him a meaningful look and then turned and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

He stood there in shock and wonder. Today was just full of revelations. He'd heard about healers with the ability to sense death, to know when it was near, but he'd never known one with the special gift. It was a legend among their kind more than anything and he'd always assumed it was a myth but the way Sunny had said those words, the way she'd looked at him, he was certain she knew what she was talking about.

A moan from the woman in the bed forced him back into the moment and he quickly moved to the bedside, "Mom?"

Dark lashes fluttered and her gaze seemed to focus in on him for only a moment before her lids drooped again and she lost focus. He found her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She was skin and bones and he felt like if he touched her too hard she'd fall to pieces. He took the chair Sunny had pulled up beside the bed and leaned close.

"Mom, I'm here."

"Logan." she said his name softly, not a question but he nodded anyway.

"I'm here."

"My boy. But not a boy. Too long."

He winced at her half-finished statements but he understood what she was saying and nodded, "I know. I was gone so long, too long, but I'm back now. I'm here and I'm all grown up so whatever it is you need to tell me, I'm ready to hear it."

"Tell… you?" she sounded confused and a rattling cough escaped her. "Love you. Always."

He felt tears well behind his eyes but blinked them back, "I love you too, Mom."

If that was what she'd called him back home for in such a rush, it was worth it. Even if he didn't get his answers, didn't get some important message he'd been expecting, this was enough. His mother loved him and had taken the time and energy she had left to tell him. It was a gift even if it threatened to break his heart.

She wheezed, drawing in ragged breaths, "Never showed it well. Your father…"

Logan frowned when she trailed off, "What about Dad?"

A moment passed that felt like an eternity and he'd almost convinced himself that whatever she'd meant didn't matter. She was struggling to breathe, and he didn't want her to stress her body any further. She gave a small squeeze of his hand and he glanced up to see her eyes had momentarily cleared again.

"He's not who you think he is, Logan." she whispered.

Logan fought the urge to scream. They couldn't be doing this again. He couldn't do it right now. He wouldn't argue with her as she lay dying, not when it was the same old fight they'd had throughout his teenage years. As he'd grown up and begun to figure out who his father truly was, he'd confronted his mother with the rumors and with the information he'd found, but she'd never wanted to hear the truth. She'd always defended her mate and now she was dying and she was still trying to change Logan's mind.

"Mom, don't. Please."

"Lo, Logan." She coughed again. "It's him."

"What?" He frowned, unable to put together her thoughts for her this time.

"He's… the… sickness."

"I know." He brushed her hair back gently, "I know you're sick because of him, because of the bond, because he's sick too."

"No." she moaned as if she was in pain and squeezed her eyes shut. "Not.. the bond. Others."

"I don't understand."

"Others. Sick." She grit her teeth and he shook his head.

"You're saying others are sick too?"

She didn't answer because a coughing fit overtook her. They wracked her body, making her shiver and shake until he was certain she was going to break her frail bones. When the fit ended she lay back against her pillow with her eyes shut and breathed, loud and raspy, trying to catch her breath again.

Logan had once hated his mother for never being there for him, for always taking his father's side, for never standing up to the bastard, but he never would have wished this torment on anyone. He loved her despite all her flaws. He still blamed her for what they'd all become but he could also see that Vivian had been right. Their mother was as much a victim of Byron's selfish, narcissistic, insatiable need for power as the rest of them, only as his bonded mate she couldn't leave him.

Knowing this was his last chance to figure out what she knew, what Darren seemed to think she knew, he forced the questions that he needed answers to and prayed she could and would answer them for him.

"Mom. I need to know what he's up to. How long has he been sick? What is it? Why are you sick from it too but worse? Is he really dying too? Why did he bring me home now? What does he want from me?"

Her lids slowly opened again and a defeated grimace twisted her once pretty face, "Legacy. You're his… must protect it."

Logan scowled, "No, I won't protect his legacy. As soon as I'm free of him, I'm going to tell everyone the awful things he's done."

Small fingers squeezed his hand as her eyes drifted shut again, "Good boy. Always such a good boy. You'll do better than us."

"I will, Mom. I'll take care of the pack. I promise."

Her eyes seemed to dart behind her lids and she suddenly squeezed his hand so tight he felt a twinge of pain, "The pack.. The sick. Dead. Dying. So many gone. You have to help them. Have to find them."

He tried to piece together the bits of information she was giving him, knowing they were important, somehow knowing this was the reason she'd wanted to see him. This was what she'd wanted to tell him. But what did it mean?

"I have to find who?" he asked. "The ones who left?"

He was surprised she even knew about that. From what he'd gathered it had been a slow but steady steam of members abandoning the pack. His father had never included his mate in the business of the pack so Logan couldn't imagine he'd revealed his master plan to her. But someone must have or else, how would she know? Sunny maybe? But why?

"Logan." Her grip on his hand loosened and he glanced up to see her eyes had focused on him again. "I have to tell you something."

"Okay." He leaned closer when she let out a raspy whisper. "What?"

"They didn't all leave." She held his gaze, trying to tell him something more than what he was hearing, but he didn't understand what she meant. "You have to find them. Find them. Destroy him. That's the legacy he deserves. Promise. Me."

"Okay. Yeah, I promise."

He said the words quickly and without thought even though he had no idea what he was promising. To find the pack members who had left or to be there for the ones who had stayed? It didn't matter. He would figure it out.

The grip on his hand loosened and Logan's heart kicked up in panic as the machine that had steadily been beeping went quiet. No . He sucked in a gasp as pain ripped through his chest. No, she couldn't be gone that quickly, not that fast. She had just been talking to him.

The machine beeped again and he blew out a rough breath.

It was okay. She was alive still. Her breaths were just coming slowly now.

"Mom?" He squeezed her hand, but it was limp in his own. He felt the tears try to come again but swallowed them down. "It's okay, you sleep now. I'm here. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

Logan sat by the bedside and watched his mother's chest rise and fall. Shallow, raspy, rough breaths that seemed to take an eternity between each one. But he didn't move. He didn't get up. He didn't release her hand. He sat beside her in the quiet, listening intently for each beep of the machine that told him she was still there, with him, even if he already felt alone.

He wasn't sure how much time passed or just how long the room had been silent before he realized the beeping was gone. There was a steady hum now and it took him a moment to place it. The red lights on the machine didn't jump anymore. They scrolled in a solid, flat line.

She was gone. And the tears he'd been holding back finally started to fall.

For the loss of his mother. For all that had been taken from her, from them. For all the years he'd lost with her. And for the last words she'd spoken to him that now, in death, seemed to make a horrifying and blood-chilling sort of sense.

He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned, seeing his sister through the dampness of his tears. She leaned down and hugged him and they held onto one another as Sunny moved around the room, unplugging the machine so that it would stop its incessant hum. He let his thoughts about his mother's words slip to the back of his mind for now.

He would have to deal with that later but for now all he could do was try to hold it together, just like he'd been doing for the past six years.