Chapter 9

CHAPTER NINE

M y mates couldn't see the magic twisted around my ankle, but they knew something was wrong. They watched me like a pack of hawks every time I got to my feet, and it was no different when I got up to pee this time. Kai and Harvey were beside me in an instant, rushing to grab an arm each to support me.

"I can walk to the bathroom without serious injury," I drawled, giving them an annoyed look. It was sweet the first three times they swarmed me, but my patience had run out. I threw Emlyn a look for intervention, but his blue eyes were narrowed on me, watching my every move.

"Serious injury," Kai echoed, a fierce light in his red eyes. "I won't risk even minor injury, my rose. We're coming with you."

"To the bathroom," I repeated, so they knew just how bizarre they were being.

A memory flashed, my own voice sounding through my head.

Listen, Kai. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. You can come watch me pee with Harvey if you want, I don't care. Just tell me what you need, because I'm not going fucking anywhere.

I swallowed the sudden lump in my throat, deluged with memories of how my mates were wrecked after my death. How, deep down, I knew they were still wrecked even if we were safe here in this timeline.

It's not real.

Fuck you, Erebus, it's real to me.

"Wait," Wane said suddenly, jerking to his feet with Kaida in his arms, her delicate wing draped over his forearm. I blinked, and that forearm was scarred all over, my name carved into his bronze skin in a patchwork of pain and defiance and unending love. I blinked again, and it was unmarred. "What is that?"

"What?" Emlyn growled, the noise coming from deep in his throat as he shot to his feet, our casual evening falling apart.

"Around your ankle, itzaia. What is that?"

"Nothing," I answered quickly, hurrying out of the room and to the stairs. Fuck, why didn't we have a downstairs bathroom I could escape into? We'd had one in—in the safehouse Wyn took us to in Hell, before we went to break Renna out of prison. Was she safe? Or had she been killed by Cronus? Pain twisted in my chest, joining the agony in my ankle, and I knew my mates felt it because they cornered me by the staircase, blocking off my access.

Even in this fake timeline, they were good mates. Amazing mates. I sniffled, tears lining my eyes. "Don't," I warned them, unable to look anyone in the eye. "We'll lose everything. So just … forget what you saw."

My eyes went to Kaida in Wane's arms, and a tear rolled down my cheek.

"What's going on?" Harvey asked, a tremor going through his wings. "Haley?"

I shook my head. Please. I can't lose this life. I don't want to.

"It's not real, is it?" Verena's voice cut through the momentary silence, and I flinched like I'd been shot. This hurt as much as when Locke actually shot me. I couldn't take my eyes off Kaida, even if Erebus's words about Verena ran through my mind.

She was always meant to be ours, no matter what timeline we were in.

"None of this," she went on, her voice quiet, scared, "the house, the happily ever after shit, the safety. Probably none of you."

"We're real," I disagreed, and swallowed the lump in my throat. "Most of us."

"Shit," Emlyn breathed, and knocked Wynvail aside so he could wrench me into a viciously tight hug. My belly pressed against his, still swollen from carrying our daughter, and she wasn't even real.

Tears overflowed, carving hot tracks down my cheeks, and I knew Em understood because he swore again, soft and raw, and lowered his head to rest against mine.

"We've been here before, Hales," he said, so gentle that every word hurt.

"No," I argued, the sound coming from deep in my throat. "No."

"If it—if this place isn't real, it's controlled by—" He growled, unable to finish, the name wiped from his head.

But Wynvail remembered. "Cronus," he spat. "He put us here. He must have."

Verena sucked in a harsh breath, and her panic was about the only thing in any timeline that could have pulled Em and I apart. We reached for her at the same time, pulling her into a group hug.

"We're not safe. We were never safe," she snapped, her body trembling. "I hate this. I hate every fucking thing about this. Get off me!" She tried to extricate herself, but I held on tighter.

"We can stay here," I pointed out in a small voice.

"Stay and be at Cronus's mercy?" Harvey demanded, his hand shaking as he dragged it down his face. "No. We go back, and we find somewhere to hide."

Like Erebus told us to. No matter who was in danger or who Cronus threatened, we go dark and stay dark.

You could have everything you wish for, Halwen. You just have to shatter this timeline—and walk away from the fight.

But everything I wished for was here in this house with my mates and Verena and Kaida. We'd have to walk away from her, we'd have to—to give her up.

She's not real.

I shook my head hard enough that my brain rattled inside my skull. She was ours; it didn't matter if she was real. I'd died twice and come back to life; was I even real at this point?

"Say that again," Kai breathed, his voice as soft as a whisper but utterly lethal. His red eyes glowed, pinned on Harvey.

Harvey backed up a step, panic cracking through his soul. "We can't stay, Kai, we're at his fucking mercy."

Kai nodded, his breathing coming faster. "We should walk away from our daughter—that's what you're saying? We should, what? Leave her here to die?"

Wane held Kaida closer to his chest, his hand wrapped around her head and rage in his molten eyes.

"She's not real," Harvey whispered. He did nothing to stop Kai's fist sailing into his jaw. "Do you think this shit is easy for me? She's mine, too." When his voice broke, more tears flooded my cheeks. Em held me tighter. "But she's not real; she's a fucking trick, because Cronus knows how badly we want a baby. She's not real."

I flinched every time he said it. Kai punched him again, and Em stepped away to break up their fight, but they all froze when I said, "I carried her for nine months. That was real. You were there for every moment of it."

Verena hugged me so hard it hurt. She didn't say anything; there was nothing to be said.

"Can we—take her with us?" Wane asked, staring at the baby girl in his arms. "If we find a way out of this place and go back? We could go on the run with her; anything's better than fighting Cronus again. We were safe for years before Locke found us. We can be safe again."

Was that what Erebus meant by being able to have everything we wished for?

"Haley," Verena said, so quietly the guys wouldn't have heard her.

I glanced down at her, and my heart seized at the terror in her green eyes, at the fear that washed out her freckled face.

"I—I sensed it back when we were in Hell, but I didn't know how to tell you."

"Sensed what, love?" I asked, my own pain swept away for the briefest second.

She swallowed, looking so fucking young with her braids and the superhero t-shirt she wore with denim shorts. She was ours, in any timeline—she was our kid, no matter what. I kissed the top of her head, remembering the years we'd had with her even if those years hadn't actually happened.

They could have, if Wyn had betrayed Locke. This had almost been real.

"I think," she whispered, pressing closer to me, "I think you're pregnant. On the outside, in your real body. Maybe that's why Cronus did all this?"

I flinched so hard, letting go of her and shaking my head. Pain grew so cruel it crushed my chest. "That's a sick thing to joke about."

"I'm not joking," she said quickly, panicking. She swallowed, tears filling her eyes—her own grief at losing this peace, this family. "I don't know how I can feel it, if it's my sunlight or—or something else but I—"

"Enough," I choked out, shutting out the words, shutting out Erebus's hints.

No.

No.

"We'll take her with us," Emlyn said firmly. I knew he was falling apart, knew he was heartbroken. Knew they all were, even if they showed it in different ways. "She's our daughter; of course we won't leave her here."

"But how do we get out?" Wynvail asked, pulling at the roots of his hair, his stare returning to Kaida every other second. "Haley?"

"Erebus said I could shatter the timeline," I said in a dead voice, processing too much, too fast. My ears began to ring. Instincts tore me in two different directions. I needed to stay with my baby. She was so new, she needed me to keep her safe, to feed her and care for her and love her. But … if I was unconscious on the island where Cronus's prison sent us, and I was—and Verena was right … that tiny spark of life was so, so vulnerable.

Tears burned my eyes; I blinked, and they rushed free. I found myself wrenched into a bruising hug, wiry arms shaking around me.

"I can't do this," Kai confessed in a rasp. "My rose, I can't."

"I know," I whispered, curling my fingers around his shirt, my chest ripping in two. "I know, Kai, I know."

"She's coming with us," Em repeated, like he could make it happen just by speaking it. "But we're all vulnerable here. We need to go back."

Wane shook his head, clutching Kaida closer. "No."

"Your—your wings," Harvey breathed, the blood draining from his face.

I spun, and the bottom crashed out of my stomach when I looked closer at my mate. He was my Wane, down to the scars and the blood and the shattered horns. Oh, god, the timeline was falling apart.

"I didn't do anything," I cried, leaning into Kai when he gripped me harder. "I don't want this. I want to stay."

"Don't leave me here," Verena gasped, her eyes blown wide with panic. She grabbed my arm desperately. "Please don't leave me."

"Never," Wyn swore.

He seized Verena's shoulder, pulling her close where she couldn't be ripped from us.

"This place is coming down around us." Harvey spun to look at our home, ghosts filling his silver eyes as he laughed bitterly. "We're losing another home."

"What happens if this timeline collapses with us inside it?" Kai demanded, a tremor moving through him into me. I gripped him tightly, every bond spiking with pain that cut deeper than I could bear. They were hurt, every one of them, and I didn't know how to fix it.

"Haley," Em said gently, snaring my gaze with love and calm. "It's okay. We'll be okay."

I shook my head, refusing to hear what he told me. We'll be okay no matter what happens. Even if we—if she didn't come with us.

"No," I growled.

But Verena shrieked when the roof ripped off the house, taking the second floor with it. Above the staircase there was only emptiness. Like the timeline had already unwound and was clinging on by its fingernails.

"Erebus did this," I spat, my whole body cold. "He intervened, gave me a dream. He's the reason this is happening."

But Harvey and Wyn glanced at each other, and Wynvail murmured, "We felt something … off yesterday."

"I did, too," Emlyn admitted.

Kai nodded.

I didn't want to admit I had, too. I wanted to stay here and be happy for the rest of our lives. But the fireplace crashed down in the living room next, and I sucked in a breath as its brick shattered into dust. We'd survived so fucking much; we couldn't be killed here. Erebus was right, that cruel bastard. We needed to get out of here, find somewhere to hide, and stay away from Cronus until he was dead.

"I don't want to leave," I confessed in a small voice.

But one glance at the fear on Verena's face, and I knew I had to. Not just because of what she suspected, but because she was mine as much as Kaida was, and she'd been through enough. She'd been tested and imprisoned and traumatised by Olympus.

"Please," Wane said suddenly, shaking his head at me at whatever he felt through the bond. He blinked and tears gathered in his eyes. He shook his head again, pleading. Begging.

My heart broke all over again, a wailing cry in the back of my throat. But it didn't stop me dropping into a crouch and digging my fingers into the wound around my ankle. It took worryingly little effort to grasp the vein of power. I gritted my teeth against the pain, ignoring the blood covering my fingers, and ripped the blue thread away.

There was no transition between here and there, no collapse of the timeline, no crashing of the rest of the house. I sat up in a rush, my heart cracked into eight pieces, and immediately drowned in agony. I gasped, unable to breathe around the pain in my soul.

Wane?

I twisted, my blurry vision enough to see this was obviously the island where we'd landed when we fell through the liquid shadow. Wane knelt in the grass a few metres from me; I stumbled to my feet and dropped down beside him, my knees weak and my chest unable to contain his pain. My head spun, lungs begging for air.

"Wane?" I rasped, my head pounding as his pain moved through the rest of my body, so vast my soul couldn't contain it. "What—?"

But I didn't have to finish; I knew instantly. He bowed over himself in the eerily still grass, brown hair hanging in his face as he stared at his empty arms.

Kaida. She wasn't here. She wasn't real.

"Such a shame," a smug voice taunted, as sharp and sudden as a whip. "You're prone to losing children, aren't you? Will you lose this one too, I wonder?"

I snapped my head up, and went completely still, even the pain freezing inside me at the sight of Verena with a knife to her freckled throat. And the bastard holding it there.

Iapetus—a titan, Cronus's brother, and the vile man who'd threatened to rape me.