Chapter Thirteen

Delaney

“Alright everyone, excellent job today. I’d like to commend Wilford and Delaney especially for really understanding the heart of this assignment— you all could stand to learn a thing or two from them. We’ll pick this up again next week when we start discussing ways to create little moments of intimacy when you’re surrounded by lots of other people.”

“Fucking pushover,” someone spits at Wil as they walk by us, exiting the classroom.

I’m proud of him; this week’s assignment had been about providing for your mate, and try as they might, nobody has been able to do better than Wilford. Every week, assignment after assignment, he consistently continues to prove that he would make the ideal mate.

I’m not saying it’s really hot, but…

What I’m saying is that it’s sexy as fuck that he’s so into proving how good at all of this he is. “Don’t listen to them. I feel like I’m flying by the seat of my pants trying to navigate this whole conduit business, and honestly, you’ve been a huge help. You’re helping me to realize there are ways to help my partners know I’m thinking about them in little ways, things I wouldn’t have thought to do before. You make this all look so easy.”

It's actually adorable how hard he blushes. “Don’t sell yourself short, Delaney. I might be doing well in this class, but that’s only because I’ve been obsessed with conduits most of my life. I think it’s riveting how you are all called upon by the goddess to build these bonds, and they’re such blessings. I can’t even imagine how wonderful that would feel to know that you had a whole group of people committed to making sure you were not only happy and healthy, but like you always had someone to hang out with, no matter the time of day. These are just silly assignments; you’re actually living it. You’re doing a pretty kick butt job I think, if the smiles on your bondeds faces are anything to go by.”

“You uh…you see that, huh?”

We start gathering our things up, and I find I don’t want to rush out of here because there’s something calming about being around Wilford.

“Delaney, everyone on campus sees you guys; you don’t do the whole conduit thing like anyone else. Then again, I suppose that’s to be expected since your mom shook everything up too when she was a student here. Do you think I could…you know what? Never mind. That was stupid of me. Can I maybe walk you to where you’re going next?”

“What were you going to ask, Wil?”

He stands slowly and runs his hands through his hair, disrupting some of the curls and making them frizz a bit. It’s hard to resist the need to smooth them down, and my fingers itching probably means something. He leans down to where I’m still sitting, barely just finishing zipping up my bag. “You cover them up a lot; and that’s not at all a criticism, I imagine they feel sort of...private? That’s how I’d feel anyway. I just wanted to know if I could perhaps look at your goddess marks.”

I whip off my sweatshirt, absolutely not missing how his eyes get caught in other places or how his breath gets heavier as he drags them to my arm. The tender way he picks my arm up to examine it like it’s something precious is such a weird thing to turn me on.

“You got a new one.”

I finally rip my eyes off him and look to my arm too, to where the headmaster’s mark sits high and proud on my arm. “Yeah. That one’s kind of complicated. It will probably be empty for a while.”

His demeanor changes in an instant. “Did someone turn you down, Delaney? I’m definitely not a fighter but maybe I could…talk to them. Surely there’s nothing more important than giving into a goddess-blessed bond.”

I stand with my bag hooked over my arm, which Jackson discreetly grabs from me. I flash him a smile before I carefully link my arm with Wil’s, feeling like it stabilizes me.

His eyes bounce down to the connection and he blushes even deeper, if that is even possible, but he puts his other hand on top of my arm, keeping it anchored to him. “I like this. So. Where are you headed to?”

“I have my weekly yoga class over in the athletic building. You don’t have to walk me all the way over there, I’m sure you have class to get to also.”

“I have about an hour to kill.”

“Don’t you want to study or get some homework done or something?”

He carefully drops my wrist and takes a slight step away from me. “I understand. You could have just said you didn’t want me to walk you, Delaney. I’m not fragile. I enjoyed our class today; let me know if you have…never mind. You won’t have any questions over the weekend because we haven’t gotten our next assignment yet. I hope you have a nice weekend.”

“Wait!” I wind my arm back with his again, linking my own hands around it this time as we finally exit the classroom and start heading down the hall. “I wasn’t saying that to get rid of you. I was only trying to offer you an out if you were busy. I don’t expect you to put me above your own studies. I love your dedication to this partnership, but you need to take care of yourself, too.”

He stops me out in the hall, looking nervous as all get out. “It’s not just for the assignments, Delaney.”

His voice is so quiet I have to have to lean forward to hear him. “It’s not?”

“I know I’m not good at…sending hints or showing you things, and I know you’d never actually consider courting somebody like me, but you must know that I’m working so hard in this class because I want to impress you.”

“Really?”

He rolls his eyes at himself. “I told you, I’m not good at this stuff. I’ve never really had anyone I truly wanted to impress before. I know how busy you are trying to figure out all these new bonds and balance school and…I don’t expect anything, you know. I just wanted to let you know that I a-a... I a-ad…I admire you. A lot. You’re always kind to me when everyone else just ignores me or makes fun of me. I’m not cool like Cory and Adam, I’m not big and strong like Jackson and August, and I certainly don’t have the credentials of Professor Wilder, or any of the intrigue of your gargoyle, and I don’t even know if you have any intention of courting anyone else, but in another life I would be honored to entertain the idea. I think…if the circumstances were different, I could be really good to you.”

I think I feel my heart breaking. “Wilford, do you have any idea what a catch you are?”

He’s about to open his mouth to speak when someone I absolutely do not want to speak to rounds the corner.

Panicking, I pull Wil into the nearest women’s restroom and lock the door behind us, because I don’t want to humiliate him any more than everyone else already has by abandoning him.

“Delaney! What are you doing? I am most certainly not permitted to be in here! What if there was a woman in here…changing a tampon or something?”

I can’t even suppress the giggle that erupts out of my mouth, nor do I want to.

Realistically I know that Headmaster Aspis will see August and Jackson out in the hall and assume I’m in here, but that’s all fine and well because it still means I don’t actually have to face him. I’m not ready to do that. Not sure I’ll ever be actually after our last disastrous interaction. “Wilford, if there were any women in here, they’d be behind a stall, with complete privacy, but there’s not. Look, all the stalls are empty. Besides, women come into bathrooms to talk all the time. We talk while we’re peeing, too, It’s not weird.”

He looks positively horrified. “You what?”

“Talk...in bathrooms? About…stuff?”

“You...while you…women are so mystifying! I could never! Aren’t you embarrassed when your tinkling is audible?”

Oh my gods. That just makes the giggling a thousand times worse. At least my bodyguard babes will know I’m perfectly well in here, because I know the doors are hardly soundproof. “You haven’t been around many women, have you?”

“Pickles, no. You are the first I’ve been even slightly familiar with. I was raised in a very strict environment; sexes were not to mix unless they were courting. In fact, I am breaking so many rules right now, Delaney. My mother would faint if she knew the position I just put myself in.”

I wipe the tears from my eyes, but then I do feel sort of bad. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just saw somebody I didn’t think I could handle talking to at this moment in time, and it seemed easier to hide than deal with him. Also, I thought if I up and disappeared like a magician’s assistant in the middle of a conversation, it would go against what I had just been saying to you about wanting to spend some time with you.”

“You…enjoy spending time with me? Truly?”

“Yes, Wilford. I think you’re refreshingly sweet.”

“And you don’t mean that…ironically?”

I step into him and wrap my arms around him, giving him a proper hug. “I’m not one to say things I don’t mean. I would never tell you something if I meant something else.”

“May I ask why you did not wish to speak to whomever was walking towards us? I must admit that I was so wrapped up in you that I hadn’t even noticed who was around us.”

“There you go again, being casually heartthrobby. How has no one snatched you up?”

“Because I’m hardly an ideal partner, Delaney. Please, distract me with your woes.”

“One of these days you’re going to see yourself clearly, I will make sure of it; in fact you just wait until the middle of the semester when things switch around and it will be my turn to woo the pants off of you and make you feel special. You’re going to be pants-less for weeks. Okay, you really want to know the tea? I think it might cause you some sort of heart-related harm. Do you have a history of heart attacks in your family?”

“Certainly, it’s not that bad.”

“I didn’t want to see them, or speak to them, because the last time we were talking, I barged into a room they were in, unannounced, tripped, and somehow managed to fall perfectly on top of them with their bare dick in my mouth. I sucked them off without their permission and we were both completely mortified and horrified and lots of other things. I absolutely do not think I could look them in the eye and speak to them. I need probably ten years or so to get over how perfectly choreographed that catastrophe was.”

Wil puffs up his chest and tucks his thumbs into his pockets, trying to look cool and collected. “That’s okay, Delaney, it’s happened to the best of us. I’m sure they don’t hold it against you.”

My jaw drops. “You’ve accidentally sucked somebody’s dick too?”

Of course, at that moment somebody starts pounding on the door. “Let me in, you freaks! Find somewhere else to do your disgusting oral activities!”

Wil blanches. “Is that Shelly?”

“Ugh. Yeah, sounds like it. Sorry, we probably could have gotten out of here sooner. You’re just so entertaining. I really do need to get to class.”

He unlocks the door to see a small collection of guys and girls leaning against a wall directly across from us, andShelly in our faces taking a picture of us. Everyone clearly thinks we were in there doing something sexual, but I don’t need an interaction with Shelly right now.

“Ignore her, Wil. She has no impact on us or our lives.” I pull him by the hand down the hall, away from the gawking, but I can’t help but look back to the small crowd still waiting around, Wil glancing awkwardly to them a few times as we disappear down the hall.

“I got you in trouble, didn’t I?”

He squeezes my palm but quickly retracts his hand to tuck it into his pocket. “It’s my fault if you feel comfortable enough around me to pull me into clandestine meetings.”

I giggle again because everything he says just seems to set me off. But I stop cold when I realize he’s wincing instead of smiling. “Hey. Talk to me?”

“Do you think you could get your mates here to walk you the rest of the way? I need to go smooth things out with my friends before someone reports something back to my parents.”

“They’d…do that? Those were your friends? I’m sorry, Wil. Truly. Fuck. I feel stupid. I haven’t really been very thoughtful about your boundaries. You’re just easy to be around.”

“That’s a high compliment, Delaney. Especially from you. Please ease your conscience, you’ve been wonderful. What is it the hip kids say? No regrets?”

“Well good luck, then. If you need me to corroborate your story at all, let me know. Can I text you this weekend?”

“If you'd like.”

With that he places a kiss on the back of my hand and strides back down the hall, leaving me feeling off kilter.

“That kid has no idea how much game he has,” August says into my ear as he covers my back. “I think you have a little crush. And what happened to not telling anyone about what happened with…you know who?”

“I didn’t mention who it happened with, just that it happened. He just needed some sort of explanation for why I pushed him into that bathroom suddenly.” I pause for a minute, considering. “I’m sort of scared to say the thing out loud though. I do think I’m crushing on him, which is ridiculous considering how many of you I already have on the hook, but there it is. If I say it and he’s not, then I’ll have to tone things down. But if I say it and I get a mark…am I ready for another one?”

“I don’t think whether you’re ready or not is really a concern we can control. Sometimes…we just have to trust that the goddess has our best interests in mind and knows what she’s doing. If she only gave out bonds when she thought we all felt ready, I doubt we’d have as many bonds to witness in this realm. If Wilford is meant to be yours, you’ll be ready for him. Because that would mean that he’s got a part of your soul, and you will be far happier with him your life than trying to live apart.”

I blink at Jackson, surprised by the passion flowing through his words. “You feel pretty deeply about that, don’t you? We’ve never really talked about this kind of stuff before.”

We start heading to class, their favorite one I have because they get to take turns staring at me contort myself in different positions in yoga pants and a tank.

“I might have gotten more pious since you were given to me, Delaney. Once I trusted the bond the goddess intended for us and I allowed myself to take what I knew deep down I really needed, my life changed dramatically. It's difficult to refute the claim of the goddess when there are so many things that don’t make sense otherwise. All the random ways your mates meet you, all the weirdly perfect ways your mates mesh together and find harmony... I can’t even pretend to want to be in control of any of that because I know I’d fuck it up. Not saying you would, but if he’s yours, he’s yours whether you find out now or three years from now. It’s not changing.”

I squeeze Jackson’s hand, feeling warm fuzzies inside. “That’s nice to think like that, actually. Takes some of the pressure off of me finding everyone. And in case you were wondering, I obviously put a lot of stock in the goddess; it’s just hard sometimes when I’m in the eye of the storm to remember that I can’t see the whole picture. I’m sort of feeling overwhelmed with all these relationships I’m supposed to be juggling. But you're all meeting me where I am and that makes the journey so much smoother. It just feels like there’s never enough time in the day to spend time with everyone in a way I really feel I need to.”

“Maybe we should shut ourselves in this weekend and spend some time group bonding. It’s a long weekend, what do you say? No classes the next few days. A lot of what goes down in that conduit bonds class feels a bit silly, but your professor does have a few good points. We all need to put more into the relationship if we want to see what it can really do.”

“I’ll agree to that only if we can look online to find information about goblin hearts. I haven’t really had the time to do any research; Leo is waiting for me to rescue him.”

“You’ve got us too, babe,” August replies. “We can all help you. We’re planning on helping you. Ash is already on it, in fact.”

“He is?”

“I think he’s really trying to impress you. Did you see the way he put cute little notes on the mirror yesterday before he left for work?”

“I did,” I tell August. “You don’t think it would be silly of me to…give in? Don’t I need to make sure a little longer that he’s serious?”

“I don’t know what sign you’re waiting for love,” Jackson says quietly as we approach the doors for the athletic building, “but from where I’m standing, he’s been giving plenty. I got up to get a glass of water last night and he was crying, on the couch where he’s been sleeping. He hid it well from me and pretended to sleep, but I could practically feel his emotions from the kitchen. I’m not saying that to guilt you into anything, but I think he’s really been doing some self-reflecting and I don’t think you need to worry about looking silly actually bonding with one of your soulmates.”

With that truth bomb, I give them each a quick hug and kiss before I have to go change in the locker room, startling when I find a dark blue jewelry box resting in my locker. I pull the note out from under it, handwritten with what looks like a real calligraphy pen on thick ivory cardstock.

To my beloved,

Forgive me for all the subterfuge, but I am not always able to pull my owns strings. If you don’t feel comfortable wearing this yet, I understand. As a show of good faith, I will tell you how you can save your gargoyle.

I truly mean you no harm, but I am nearly as stuck as he is.

Maybe you’re frightened of me, and maybe you have every right to be, but I promise you know me. We were so good together then, and I fought against everything in me to pull myself from you and wait for the timing to be perfect.

Is it creepy if I admit I’ve been watching you? You’re so beautiful; you always were.

I have a lot less to do with this arrangement than you’d think, and I am just trying to make the most out of our duty. I hope in time it will not feel like a duty to you, however.

I’ll know when you’re ready to confront me.

Rush

Against my good and bad judgment, I flip open the jewelry box and gasp at the stunning ring nestled inside. Front and center, there’s a large oval cut amethyst in a shade of purple that’s eerily similar to the color of my eyes. It’s nestled into what might be silver or white gold, the actual band constructed of thin vines with little diamonds nestled into where the leaves would be. The whole thing is very nature inspired and stunning, unlike any ring I’ve ever seen.

I look back to the note as I fidget with the ring, getting caught on the words ‘ I promise you know me.’

My hands shake as I look to the back of the note, seeing a long, detailed list of instructions on how to put the goblin heart to use to break any and all curses. I don’t want to risk losing this because it feels like this is the lifeline I’ve been waiting for. If I can get Leo to me, I feel like a lot of my problems will be solved. I’m not even sure if these instructions will do anything, but the flashy engagement ring kind of says it might.

Realizing I’m the last one in here, I change quickly and shove the notes into the pocket on the side of my pants, sliding the ring onto my finger to keep it safe more than anything. There are always stories of people getting their lockers broken into, and this is far too valuable and pretty to just leave laying around.

I slip by August and Jackson as I walk into the room my class is held in, slipping the whole note into their pocket to keep it safe. They catch me by the hand and stare at me, silently asking about the gorgeous ring on my hand, but it’s not on my actual ring finger, and it is really pretty. “Read the note. I’ve got to get out there and get a mat.”

The class goes by very blurrily; I know I’m going through all the motions and doing the stretches and strengthening my muscles, but my mind is full of ideas and hopes, lots of trepidations too.

“Pretty ring,” one of my classmates says as they walk by when we start cleaning up after class.

“Thanks,” I say quietly.

As soon as I have my things put away and I’m officially done with classes for the day, August and Jackson pull me to the hallway and grab my hand, holding it up to see the ring from all different angles.

“Well, if this is from the demon he doesn’t seem like he’s too scary,” August finally announces.

“It sounds like you know him. You sure you don’t know him?”

I shake my head at Jackson’s question. “I can confidently say I’ve never met anyone with blue skin or that identified as a demon, unless they were changing their appearance like Cory guessed. If that’s the case, then it could have been literally anybody I’ve ever had an interaction with.”

August is checking up and down the halls like he’ll be able to spot the demon himself. “Maybe this is one of those times we trust the goddess?”

I scoff. “You don’t have to sound so happy about that.”

Jackson picks me up, forcing me to wrap my legs around his waist as he walks me to the entrance of the locker room. “We’ll figure it out. It’s the end of your school week. Why don’t you get changed so we can grab dinner, and then we can go relax and talk to everyone else and see what to make of it.”

“What if I free him and it’s not the same? What if he doesn’t want me after that?” It’s a stupid confession to make but it’s still sitting in my heart, rattling around. “Knowing I have the knowledge to free Leo feels like I have to. If I wait and he finds out I had it earlier, there’re going to be problems. But if I do it right away…”

Jackson’s kiss is a great way to get my brain to refocus itself. “You’re not alone in this. No matter how many times you need to tell yourself that, do it.”

“I think I’m just going to throw a hoodie on and call it a day; I don’t really want to change right now. Let me just grab my backpack and we can get out of here.”

One of them slaps my ass as I drop to my feet and head into the locker room, passing everyone that’s in some sort of in between state of getting re-dressed, others on the way out and choosing to remain in the comfy clothes like me.

“Was that your locker?” a girl I was stationed next to today asks, pointing.

“What the fuck?”

“Hopefully you didn’t have anything important in there. I’ve heard that there are some assholes that like to break into lockers occasionally, but I’ve never seen it look so…angry.”

My locker is busted wide open, nearly hanging off its hinges. All my shit is spilling out of it, backpack upside down on the ground. “Uh, no I didn’t have anything important in there,” I tell her with my heart speeding through my chest. I feel completely obligated to send a prayer of thanks up to the goddess for giving me the urge to wear my ring and take the note from my demon.

“Here, I can help you. This is really messed up.”

She kneels next to me and starts gathering papers up, straightening them before handing me the pile. “I’m Violet, by the way.”

I reach out and shake her hand. “Feels silly to be introducing myself when we’ve been in this class together for weeks, but I usually keep to myself. Delaney.”

“Hey, you don’t have to explain yourself to me. I’m a conduit too; it’s overwhelming sometimes trying to figure out how to handle the myriad of relationships we’re expected to find and develop, sometimes interacting with anybody else is too much.”

“Oh my gods, that’s exactly it. It’s not that I’m like, unfriendly, I just always have so much going on.”

“You’re across the dormitory hall from me, aren’t you? You’re that weird retro room on the end, right?”

I get everything back in my backpack and zip it up, pulling it onto my shoulders only for everything to fall right through the bottom of it when I stand up. “Motherfucker!”

“Ouch. Whoever did this must not like you; there’s a big hole cut through the bottom of your backpack.”

“Fucking perfect.”

“Um, that sucks. I’m really sorry. You sure there’s nothing missing?”

“If there is, it’s only assignments I’ve gotten back already. I turned in all my assignments today, and I see all my textbooks. I think one of my mates has my phone because he likes to hold it when I’m busy.”

“That’s lucky, then. I wonder what they were looking for?”

It’s way too soon to trust her, and who knows if she actually had anything to do with this. I’m not about to spill the deets on the ring and instructions I just received right before class, but I do twist the ring so the gems are facing my palm and therefore less obvious. “Who knows. I better go let our instructor know about the locker damage. Thanks for helping me.”

“You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be good. Like I said, some of my mates are outside so they’ll be able to help me carry all this.”

“Okay, well feel free to come say hi this weekend if you get bored. I just got this awesome new coffee maker, and we could make some lattes and chill if you feel up to it. My door is the one with the stupid stickers all over it; I have a mate that thinks he’s funny.”

“That’s—" it’s on the tip of my tongue to deny her, but then again, maybe befriending someone that knows what I’m going through would be helpful. “That might be really nice, actually. I’ll stop by some time tomorrow when I’m free and see if you’re around.”

“Cool. See you then!”

She walks out while I seek out the fitness instructor’s office over in the corner and give her a quick report of the broken locker, getting assigned a different one and a new lock before I can leave the locker room finally and tell August and Jackson about the shitshow I just experienced.

I’ll be lucky if I’m allowed to change in the locker room anymore or store any of my stuff in there from here on out.