Chapter 4

I felt naked walking through the marketplace, so sure that someone would recognise me and point and shout, declaring my disgrace to all and sundry, but no one did. People were too busy going about their own business to notice an errant princess and her saviour. I found myself noticing him. When Arik snaked an arm around my waist as he walked us out of the castle, I'd nearly jumped out of my skin, but the guards barely looked our way when they saw a warrior and a maid going for a walk. He'd been forced to let me trail behind him as we surged through the crush of the marketplace, but his hand had held tight to mine the whole time, pulling me forward until we came to the docks.

The Tellene River snaked along the border between Khean and Matteau, keeping the two mighty kingdoms from being at each other's throats, while also bringing trade to our port. The stink of rotting wood, fish, and harsh tar assaulted my nose, but as we walked along the waterfront, which was much less densely packed than the marketplace, I felt a thrill of excitement.

I was going to get away with it.

I would use the gold I got from selling the pearls and crown jewels to book a secure passage on a riverboat. Perhaps I would head to one of the goddess-blessed lands far south of the three kingdoms, where apparently women ruled, not men. The tales of their savage religious rites, that included the ritual self-castration of some of their male devotees, were discussed with a mix of horror and titillation at court, but still… Surely, they would take in a refugee, fleeing from certain death if she—

"Now…" Arik pivoted on his heel to face me. Wrapped up in my thoughts, I almost collided with him and had to plant my hands on his chest to stop my progress. He smiled softly and took those hands of mine in his, rubbing his thumbs across the back of them. His touch was comforting and… something else, as well. His expression turned serious, and I drew in a breath, readying myself for whatever he might be about to divulge. "This place we're going to is not somewhere a gently-bred lady would frequent."

"And that suits me fine," I replied crisply, relieved he was neither suggesting I wait for him elsewhere while he carried out my business, nor was he telling me he had changed his mind. "For, if we were to go to any of the reputable jewellers in the capital, they'd report back to my…" Arik's eyes sharpened as he looked more closely at me. "…husband of what I intend, and that must not happen." My hands shifted in his so that I could clasp his fingers in mine. I tightened my grip to impress my point upon him. "I need the utmost discretion, Master Arik. It's vitally important."

"Oh, you'll get discretion in The Siren's Call," he said, nodding toward the worn wooden sign hanging over the door of a dingy-looking inn. "Not many of the folk who frequent the place want their actions reported back to those that matter. So that means you'll need to keep your head down and your eyes to yourself while you're in there. And you must stay close to me, because any woman that enters a place like that … Well, she might be there for any number of things, but none of them are respectable."

At that, the warmth in his touch took on a whole other meaning and I wasn't sure if I wanted to lean into it or pull away. I knew what he spoke of: I'd heard lectures delivered at court, near daily, about proper womanly behaviour as well as a recitation of the subsequent ruin of those women who did not adhere to it. We unmarried noblewomen received lesson after lesson on what we were not supposed to do, from showing a little too much ankle due to your dress being cut a whisper too short, to touching the arm of any man who was not your father or brother.

And to what end?

I frowned slightly, for the first time questioning the world I had grown up in. And, also for the first time, feeling the weight of the expectations of all those around me—my parents, the royal court, my country—as a burden. But I was determined that it would be one that I would shuck off if I went through with this plan. I shook my head, shaking off any temptations to hesitate or defer this, then met Arik's intent gaze.

"Take me to The Siren's Call, Master Arik, and…" My gaze slid down to his lips, and for a moment I was transfixed, as though I'd suddenly discovered the need to commit their curve to memory. I flicked my eyes back up to meet his and found the nerve to finish what I had started to say. "…you'll find me most appreciative."

"Very well, lass."

Warmth filled Arik's eyes and he nodded at me. As he turned toward the inn, he drew me to him with one hand and tucked me into his side before he wrapped his other arm around my shoulders, pressing me more firmly against him in a protective and blatantly possessive action. An action that made my heart swell in my chest as conflicting emotions threatened to overwhelm me.

Tears filled my eyes although I did not allow them to fall. Arik's almost courtly gesture had, unwittingly, made my already overwrought mind snag on the realisation that all I'd wanted in a marriage was the simple pleasure of being seen, cared for and cherished for who I was. That was what I'd expected I would find with whoever my father deemed worthy of marrying me. I'd been prepared for my husband to be older, stouter, or to snore in his sleep. Plenty of the married noblewomen at court had told me that while their husbands did one or all of those things, they were also loving spouses. The reason I'd been so excited about that wedding dress was not simply that it was a stunning creation, but because wearing it acknowledged that I would be leaving my father's protection, to be given to a worthy man who would care for me.

But the King of Khean was no worthy man.

If today had shown me anything, it was that my father valued me so little that he had willingly signed my death warrant. And then he'd commemorated the occasion with a white dress to signify my innocence, my purity, my naiveté. I'd been the perfect victim, one who he'd trained to docilely accept her fate. I had trusted him, thought I was in safe hands, but I couldn't have been more wrong. So why not put myself into the hands of a stranger? Arik couldn't treat me any worse than Father had and, anyway, this was a transaction. I'd ensure Arik was well paid for his troubles and then I'd be on my way.

"Come with me, then, if you're determined," he said, squeezing my shoulder, and I answered him the only way I could. My arm went around his waist, pressing myself more firmly to him. I'd played the role of diligent daughter most of my life, I could be Arik's doxy for a few hours if that's what it took.

And after?

I'd do the one thing women were rarely able to. I'd determine my own fate, find my own way in this world, and discover who the hell I was under all of these layers of expectations, rules and, regulations.

"Lead the way, Master Arik," I said, giving his body a squeeze.