Chapter 28

TWENTY-EIGHT

MILES

T he beeping of machines keeps me company as I watch the rise and fall of Braxton's chest. He just got wheeled back from recovery after his surgery to close the wound caused by the Jackal's knife. He's breathing independently, and the doctors tell me that's good.

Aella bursts into the room, a frantic look on her face. I told her not to come, to stay at work to keep up the ruse. But tension leaves me in a rush when I rise and pull her into me.

"What happened?" She sniffles as she pulls back, looking up at me with her bloodshot blue eyes full of heartbreak. I hadn't thought of how tired she was. I called her as I rode in the ambulance with Braxton, holding his hand the entire way. As if that would keep him here.

"A Jackal came to deliver a message to Zeke's while we were all there drinking. "

She points to Brax, turning and looking him over. "And this is their message ?"

I sigh. "They want us to steer clear of them because they've got something illegal going on, and Braxton thinks he uncovered some of it. So, yes, this is their message."

Guilt waves in my stomach. I should've been out there with him. I'd have made him sit back down.

I shake my head at myself inwardly because, no, I wouldn't have. I can't make Braxton do anything he doesn't want to.

"I'm glad you're alright," she says, turning and kissing me quickly before returning to Brax. Dropping her bag to the ground, she sits on the bedside opposite where I have a chair.

I replace my ass down into it, holding his other hand.

"I'd rather it be me than him," I mutter.

She scoffs. "He wouldn't rather it be you. Don't say that."

"I told you to go to work," I tell her, and her brows knit together.

"No one tells me what to do. I called in through the proper channels and told them I had a family emergency," she counters, and the way my chest surges at the fact she'd referred to us as a family is surreal.

I clear my throat to speak, but Brax opens his eyes and groans. Just like the enormous brute he is, he tries to sit up, grasping at tubes and monitors as he does so, grumbling about things touching him.

"Hey, hey, hey," I tell him, pressing him back firmly. "You need all those tubes to stay alive, big fella."

He coughs and then winces in pain. "I'm like two inches taller than you, Miles."

I smile, but as soon as my hand moves, so does he. He tries his damnedest to sit up against my and Aella's protests.

She hasn't said a word but has her hands on him, trying to lay him back down. I don't think he even registered that she's here yet. His eyes have remained on me the entire time.

"Miles," he says, and my stomach tightens.

I try to flick my eyes to Aella to tell him she's here. I need to get him to stop looking at me and shift his attention because I can't do this with him. Not when everything is so raw. Not when I'm not in control of everything inside my chest. My heart.

"Brax, listen…"

He grabs the front of my shirt. "All those years that you saved your lips for me. All those lies about Mom being your last kiss. All the bullshit. Was it worth it?"

The room melts away, and I even forget Aella sitting beside us.

"I had to remember it…"

"We've wasted so much time pretending, Miles. I could've died. You can't tell me you don't feel the same. Miles, Aella is the first person I've seen you kiss since that night in my room. You didn't want to erase my kiss. Admit it."

My heart pounds in my chest.

"You still can't? Even now?" His eyes are pleading, and I know Aella's mind is whirring. I told her the same bullshit I told everyone else about why I don't kiss.

I close my eyes, trying to figure out what to say, and I feel his grip on my shirt loosen. He lays back in his hospital bed, and that's what jars me.

His hospital bed!

I open my eyes.

"It's all ridiculous. I knew I was stupid for hanging onto it all. You're too worried about what everyone will think. What they'll say when our backs are turned…"

I grasp the front of his hospital gown and tug him back up to me, crashing my mouth to his. The same red-hot passion is still there as if it had been waiting these years since that fleeting night when we'd let it all go when we were eighteen. When we'd had too many beers, let one too many guard walls down.

He groans and turns his head, the kiss deepening, and my tongue slips into his mouth. Blazing warmth skims through my body, dick hardening for him.

"Fuck, Miles," he says, breaking away only to dive back into me.

I grasp the back of his head, tugging his lips from mine, using his hair as a handle. "I've never stopped wondering if I was wrong for ignoring what's been between us all this time. I know I'm a stubborn fool, but I didn't need you to point it out in front of Aella."

His eyes sober, lust floating away from inside them as he turns his head to meet Aella's entranced gaze. She breathes out as I, too, turn my head. We're still embracing. I grip his hair firmly in my hand .

Her mouth hangs wide open as she looks between us, blinking rapidly.

"You alright over there, Bambi?" Braxton asks sheepishly.

"I—Well, you—" She fans herself and stands, adjusting her pants, and we both register it. Brax chuckles as she does, but then he grumbles in pain.

I help him lie back easily. "Yeah, you idiot, you're injured. Now really isn't the time to profess your love and make out with people."

"I didn't profess my love. I was trying to get you to," he groans, grabbing his incision wound to hold some pressure over it.

"Well, same difference."

Aella is standing now, her mouth covered as she watches the two of us calculatingly.

I clear my throat, and her stare pulls to me. "Want to go into the hall with me, Aella?"

Her look gets a little sharper, and I bristle at it. She's mad at me, I realize.

"I'll stay here, thanks."

I have to wonder if she's mad at what she just saw or if her feelings will change between us.

No one knows what happened between Braxton and me, and I thought I'd always keep it that way. Keep my lips for only him; it would remain that way for the rest of my life. But I didn't realize how much I was punishing us for something out of our control.

Aella sits on the side of the bed, and I decide to table it. There's too much happening in her world right now, and I don't need to add to it with my bullshit, even if I'm dying to know what she thinks about what she just witnessed.

Braxton is finally asleep, and Aella stands and stretches. The afternoon was only slightly awkward. Aella doted on Brax, feeding him and getting everything he needed. When the doctors wanted him up and moving, I helped him to the bathroom and around the room.

There's tension between the three of us, but for different reasons.

It's not what we should be focused on right now. The Jackals are likely planning their next move. Aella's father could grow suspicious of where she is right now, and there are tons of worries rumbling around in my mind that I need to deal with.

But neither of us seems to be locked in on any of that. I catch her stare every so often, and she catches mine.

Brax has been looking at us like he's exasperated with the both of us all day.

Aella comes toward me, and my heart beats a little quicker. She slides into my lap and wraps her arms around my neck, and I'm surprised.

"I'm not mad at you for kissing him," she says.

It's like she only needed time to process. And now that she has, she's ready to discuss. Brax is that way, so it's something I've gotten used to. Honestly, the longer I've known him and how he operates, the better it's for me not to react in the moment, too.

"You're mad because I lied."

She nods, but her eyes are soft and forgiving. "I get why you did, though. Now that I've had time to think about it. Don't think for one second I don't condone the love between you two. Because I do."

I nod at her words, swallowing past the lump in my throat. "I don't know how what just happens factors into us. The collective us, I mean," I tell her.

She smirks. "The collective us. I like that."

I shake my head at her. "Of course you do, greedy princess. Can't have too many princes, hm?"

She laughs and then remembers Brax is asleep, so she covers her mouth.

"No. A girl can't have too many princes. There's no such thing. There aren't any rules to say who you can and can't love, nor how many people you're allowed to love, either."

I breathe her words in, letting her acceptance fill me. "Aella, I want to tell you the truth, and I'm sorry I lied."

She cups my face. "It's okay. I know why you did."

"One night, when we were younger and more foolish, we had too much to drink. That's not to say it's why it happened, but it's why inhibitions slipped away. Far away. The way he kissed me, Aella. Like I was the only person he wanted on the face of the universe. The only one he'd ever love."

She nods with a knowing grin on her face. "I know the feeling. It's how he kisses me. It's so consuming."

My face softens, a breath leaving me. "It's fucking addictive."

"How far did things go that night?" she asks, and I smirk.

"You little fiend, don't pry."

She giggles again, minding the volume so we don't bother Brax.

"It didn't go further than the kiss. But the next day, when the world came crashing back around us, I knew I'd never kiss another that same way. I knew no one would accept us, too. I vowed to kiss no one but him again. It took a while before he realized I wasn't kissing any women I took to my room. I know he knew he was the reason. But a few weeks later, he confessed his feelings to me, and I couldn't do the same. Not that I didn't feel them; it's just that I wasn't ready to feel them. To admit them. To let anyone else know what was inside me…"

"Stubborn man," she says, leaning in and kissing my cheek.

"I was raised to think a certain way. So was Brax, but he's always been so fluid with how he views the world, and I'm not. You know? It's hard."

She shakes her head. "You need to just get out of your way; that is what you need to do."

I narrow my gaze at her. "So, this is something you're willing to be a part of?"

I recall how she shifted as she stood up from the bed after Brax and I kissed, how her cheeks had flushed.

"Who am I to impede love? It makes no sense for me to stand in your way when I'm sharing the both of you. "

"Mmm, and it has nothing to do with how hot you thought us kissing was, hm?"

Her cheeks heat, and she slaps my shoulder. "Don't pick on me."

"Or what?" I tease, poking her side.

"Or I'll get Brax to beat you up. He is bigger, you know."

I laugh, and she shushes me.

"She's right. I am. Don't pick on her," Brax murmurs, shifting on the bed.

"You're supposed to be resting," I taunt as Aella moves off my lap and gets into bed with Brax, coiling around him for warmth and comfort. His face turns, and he kisses her forehead.

Looking at the both of them together, both of the people I've ever cared for, nuzzling into one another, means more than I can ever express.

"Go get us some dinner, peasant," Brax commands, and Aella lifts her hand in approval.

"Yeah, mush, mush!" she adds, and I shake my head at the both of them.

Aella closes her eyes and snuggles closer as Brax turns into her and does the same.

"Alright, alright. I'll get food. I'll be back."

Both murmur as I move closer and kiss Aella on the cheek. I hover momentarily, hesitating for a second before doing the same to Braxton.

The world has gone topsy-turvy, so why not let the chips fall where they may?