Chapter 21

21

Lila (Nala)

" C ome on, Kari, it's time to go."

I begrudgingly grabbed our bags and opened the door of the motel. Kari walked out ahead of me as we made our way down to the front desk to return the key. When that was taken care of, we stepped out of the office, and went to the blacked-out Escalade waiting for us. True to his word, Ahmad had put a detail on us. He knocked on the door around ten last night to make himself known.

As we approached the truck, Ty, as he introduced himself as, opened the door and stepped out.

"Good morning, Ms. Lila. Ms. Makari."

"Good morning."

He reached for our bags then opened the back passenger door. While we made ourselves comfortable, he placed our bags in the trunk along with my crutch.

"Mommy, are we going back to Mr. Ahmad's?" Kari asked.

"We are."

She smiled and I offered one in return. The mention of his name almost made me want to cry. Watching her run to hug him last night made me realize just how attached she was growing to him and he was to her. He didn't fuss about germs when she showed him affection. It was the most relaxed I'd seen him.

His words rang in my head. Not once have I even thought about never seeing you again. I didn't mean to hurt him, but I hadn't thought about seeing him again after this was over. I thought he'd be happy to get rid of us so he could have his life back, especially after being shot because of me. Why would he want that burden?

The entire ride back to his home, I thought of what I was going to say when I saw him. I wasn't sure if he was expecting us to come back, especially since he sent a suitcase full of our clothes with Ty. Hell, I wasn't even sure we were welcomed back. Yet still, when we pulled into the yard, he was waiting on the front porch.

Kari's face lit up when she saw him. He made his way down the front steps. As soon as the car came to a stop, she was unbuckling her seat belt. When he opened her door, she jumped into his arms.

"Mr. Ahmad! I missed you."

She wrapped her tiny arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.

"I missed you too, Rabbit." He kissed her cheek and placed her on her feet. He slammed the door so hard that I jumped.

"He'll cool off eventually," Ty said, opening his door. "Let me help you."

I sighed. "Thank you."

He popped the trunk and got out to open my door. I took hold of the arm he extended to me and eased out. He grabbed my duffel and the suitcase while I grabbed the shopping bags. Ahmad was already inside with Kari. With Ty's help, I made my way into the house. I could tell I'd overdone it with putting pressure on it yesterday because it was killing me.

Inside, Ahmad had Kari seated at the table with a plate of breakfast food in front of her. She smiled and hummed softly as she tore into whatever he made her. Ty helped me over to the couch to sit down then grabbed a pillow to put under my foot.

"Better?" he asked with a smile.

He was handsome and his smile was beautiful.

"Yes. Thank you."

"No problem. Don't let boss's grouchy ass get to you. He can be a hard ass, but he's also a man. Even gangstas have feelings."

"You talking a lil too much over there," Ahmad said, not even looking in our direction as he fixed another plate.

Ty chuckled as he stood. "See. Have a good day, Ms. Lila."

"Thank you."

"Be easy, Play."

Ahmad remained quiet. Ty shook his head and laughed as he walked out the front door and closed it. I rested my head against the back of the couch and closed my eyes. The tension in the air was so thick that it was suffocating. I wasn't sure how long I could stand this.

"Here."

I opened my eyes to see Ahmad standing in front of me with a plate of food, a glass of orange juice, and my pain meds. Slowly, I took the contents from his hands.

"Thank you," I whispered. He didn't say anything, just glared at me before walking off. "Ahmad." He turned to me with a stoic expression. "Can we talk… please?"

"Ain't nothing to talk about."

His tone was cold… almost as cold as it was when I first met him. This shit was crazy. Fucking insane. Why the hell were we in our feelings? The man kidnapped me and my baby, and now we seemed to be in a waging war of feelings that should have never come to play.

Was I insane?

Was it Stockholm syndrome? There was just no way this was life right now.

I placed the plate of food on the table. My appetite was gone. After popping open the pill bottle, I took one and downed it with the juice. As I settled back onto the couch, I looked over at Ahmad and Kari. She smiled brightly and spoke a mile a minute as she gave him a rundown of our day yesterday. He listened attentively and didn't interrupt her.

Their interactions were cute, but it also made me sad for her. The only man she'd ever had as a father figure was my father and most of that was through FaceTime calls. Sure, they came to visit, but it wasn't the same as having him in the home with us. She didn't get daddy daughter dates like I did growing up. She didn't get to experience the joys of being a daddy's girl.

She didn't get to be spoiled by a man who would allow her to get away with murder because she was just that spoiled. When I first left Slim, I often wondered what kind of father he would have been. Would he have been active? Would he have loved her? Would her birth somehow change him?

Then I thought to myself, if a man wanted to change, he'd do it regardless of a child or any other circumstance. Slim was exactly the man he wanted to be. Kari's birth wouldn't have changed the way he treated me, and I never wanted my daughter to think love came from suffering or struggling.

It was pure and given freely. It wasn't rooted in how much she could take a man putting her through. It didn't depend on the strength she was forced to have because of any nigga. I gave her love in its purest form. Should I find a man who one day extended that to both of us, so be it. Until then, it was up to me to show her the way.

Again, I looked over at her and Ahmad. She playfully stole a grape from his fruit bowl. He tickled her, causing her to erupt into a fit of giggles. I smiled softly. Without even realizing it, he had allowed her to soften his heart. I started thinking about what would become of him when we were no longer together. It saddened me. Not the thought of what would become of him… but the thought of leaving him altogether.

Later That Night

The house was quiet. Kari had fallen asleep about an hour ago. I'd taken my shower and slipped into my robe. It was raining cats and dogs, and while I should have allowed it to lull me to sleep, I was prepared to go plead my case. I made up my mind that I was going to make Ahmad talk to me one way or another. After kissing my baby goodnight, I slipped out of the room, softly closing the door behind me. I walked down the hall to his room and knocked.

No answer.

I knocked again.

No answer. Taking a chance, I twisted the knob and pushed the door open. The room was empty in its pristine condition. With a heavy sigh, I closed the door and headed for the stairs. At the bottom, I found Ahmad sitting in the middle of the living room meditating.

He was shirtless and a light fire rolled in the fireplace. The temperature had dropped significantly, and it added a warmth to the space. Slowly, I walked over to where he sat with his eyes closed.

"What?" he asked grumpily.

"Ahmad."

"Don't come down here fucking up my peace."

"Can you look at me… please?"

A frustrated growl purred in his throat as his eyes slowly opened. He looked up at me. Though his eyes were angry, I could tell there were so many emotions behind them. Being vulnerable was a crutch to him. It was like it left him exposed and being exposed could lead to him being hurt.

I didn't want to hurt him… I swear I didn't.

I stood in front of him then lowered myself onto his lap.

"Lila, stop."

I placed a finger to his lips as I came eye level with him. He refused to look at me. Gently, I cupped his face and turned his head to mine.

"I'm sorry," I whispered before pecking his lips.

"You need to move," he said in an almost a pained voice.

I could feel his manhood growing beneath me. No matter how upset he was with me, his attraction couldn't be denied.

"I'm sorry, baby," I whispered again.

I pressed my lips to his, kissing him sensually. He hesitated for a moment before kissing me back. He tried to rush it, but I stopped him.

"No," I said, looking deep into his eyes. "Slow."

I didn't give him a chance to protest before I resumed kissing him in the manner I wanted to. With my body pressed against his, I slowly wound my hips. His hands came to my sides and slowly dropped to my thighs. The pressure of his fingers digging into my skin only heightened my arousal.

Reaching between us, I slipped my hand into his basketball shorts and pulled his dick out. The stickiness of his precum lightly coated my fingers as I stroked him. Lifting my hips, I slowly eased myself down onto his shaft.

"Shit!"

He hissed as he sank into the wetness of my warm walls. His eyes remained closed as I glided my hips up and down. I wrapped an arm around his shoulder and cupped his face.

"Look at me," I commanded.

His grip on my thighs tightened, but his eyes were still closed.

"Ahmad…" I panted heavily as the rise and fall of my hips became steady. "Look at me, please…" His eyes finally opened, and he peered into mine. "Tell me you forgive me."

"You… Shit! You got me fucked up, Bunny. You wanna take this away from me? You wanna take you and Rabbit from me?"

"No… I—oh God! I don't wanna take anything from you. I—"

My words hitched as he began thrusting upward. My head dropped back, and his lips immediately went to the sensitive spot on my neck. He pulled the sash on my robe and it fell open, exposing my breasts and hardened nipples. The sensation of him latching on to one caused me to whimper. I cupped the back of his head and watched as he devoured one then the other.

"Ahmad…" I moaned his name loudly. "I want you."

"I want you, too, baby."

His hand moved from my thighs to grip my ass. I stared down at him and he slowly guided me in riding him. This was fucking insane. He was the last man I should ever profess my longing for, yet he was the only man I'd said those words to in years. He was the only man to grace my body in all this time. This was nothing like all the other times we had sex.

This wasn't fucking… We were making love. Sweet, mad, passionate love. Moans poured from both of us, filling the empty space as rain, thunder, and lightning drowned them out. I clung to him as he clung to me until finally, we came together in beautiful synchrony. Our eyes met, then our lips. His hands came to the sides of my face, and he kissed me with so much passion.

Abruptly, he pulled away and looked at me seriously.

"Don't ever dip outta here like that again, you understand me?"

"I understand."

"If something had happened to you or Makari before I could get to you, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself. I want… I need you safe. Both of you. I don't know what the fuck you did to me, Bunny. Shit wasn't supposed to be like this. It's hard."

"You think it's easy connecting with the man that kidnapped me? You think it's easy watching my daughter get attached to you, Ahmad? It's not. Nothing could have prepared me for this shit."

We stared at each other for the longest time, neither of us saying anything. What could we say?

Ahmad's face softened. "I want to see you when this is over," he confessed. "I wanna take you out on a date. I wanna get to know your stubborn, petty ass and I wanna know Rabbit."

"How are we gonna do that? I don't know where I want to be when this is over. I wanna be close to my parents, but Georgia is full of terrible memories for me. I feel like I'd be looking over my shoulder at every turn and that's no way to live. I like Cali. Kari and I have built a nice life together there. I have a job doing what I love. Kari loves her school, and she adores her nanny. How am I supposed to give up the peace we had once this is over? And then there's you. I don't even know where you live."

He chuckled. "I live in Cali."

My eyes widened. "You do?"

"I do."

I punched him in the chest. "Why the hell wouldn't you tell me that!"

"It never came up."

"When you were mad at my comment would have been the perfect time to say something, Ahmad."

"You'd already pissed me off. I wasn't saying shit."

I shook my head. "I see we will have to work on communication skills."

"Give me some grace. This shit is new to me, a'ight?"

He pulled me back into his chest and kissed me again. My heart softened when he pressed his forehead to mine.

"I won't get everything right… but I'll try. I promise."

I nodded. "That's all I ask."

We shared yet another sensual kiss that had his dick bricking up inside me once again. In no time, I was on my back, and he was digging in my guts. I wasn't sure where this was going to go, but we were already this far in into craziness. We might as well go full throttle.