Chapter 9

NINE

Before the Riests had shown up, Turi had settled into a comfortable routine in the fortress. She spent her mornings learning to read with Ellion, her afternoons exploring the library or trying her hand at cooking in the kitchen, and her evenings chatting with Ara or watching the stars from her bedroom window. The initial shock and fear of her abrupt change in circumstances had worn off, replaced by a sense of curiosity and a hunger to learn. She didn’t miss the settlement, but the only thing that always hurt was wondering and worrying about what happened to her friends.

Ellion was a patient and encouraging teacher. He never rushed her or showed frustration when she struggled with a particular word or symbol. Instead, he would simply smile and say, “Take your time, Turi. Learning is not a race.” She looked forward to their lessons, not just for the knowledge she gained, but also for the time spent with him. His presence was calming, and the deep timbre of his voice as he read aloud was addictive. She was reading advanced books, now, choosing science and astronomy, literature and history. There wasn’t a topic Turi didn’t want to learn about, and she soaked in everything, trying to make up for lost time when she wasn’t permitted to even look at written symbols.

After the Riests’ disturbing revelation about the settlement females, Turi took herself to the kitchen, attempting to recreate a dish Ellion had described from his travels. She played a tune in her head she’d heard Ara sing, to distract herself. The melody was foreign yet soothing. The kitchen was as messy as her mind, with ingredients scattered on the counters and utensils tossed about, but she didn’t mind. She found working helped her process this new knowledge about the conditions the females at the settlements now faced.

Also, there was that kiss she’d shared with Ellion. It hadn’t been one-sided. He’d kissed her and she’d kissed him back. It had been the most incredible and dreamlike thing she’d ever experienced. Part of her wondered if it really happened or if it was imagined. Kissing Ellion was a full-body flood of sensations. Surely, that wasn’t normal.

Ellion entered the kitchen, his wings folding neatly behind him as he leaned against the doorway. His scales lay flat and only noticeable in certain light, when it hit and they glimmered purple. He pushed back his dark hair and watched her with guarded eyes. He was just too handsome, too powerful, for someone like Turi. She was a small Terian who questioned everything and was, admittedly, a terrible cook. “Hello, Ellion,” she said.

“Something smells…interesting,” he said with a small smile.

Turi looked up from the lumpy dough she was kneading. “I’m trying to make those bread twists you mentioned. The ones with the seeds?”

He raised an eyebrow, impressed. “Need any help?”

She shook her head. “They’re going to turn out awful, but I don’t care. I just needed to keep my hands busy.”

Ellion pushed off from the doorway and approached the counter. He stood close to her, his arm brushing against hers as he reached for the dough. “I can keep your hands busy,” he said, lifting hers from the dough and holding them in both of his. His hands were strong and sure, and Turi went still, caught in the spell of…whatever this was between them. They had kissed . Sort of. No, they had. And during that brief moment, the world had fallen away and there had only been the two of them. No Axis. No settlements. Nothing.

But reality was back and so were feelings that were confusing and frightening. “About what happened in the library,” she said thickly. “It can’t happen again. You said the Axis don’t permit us to—to… do things.”

His dark glittering eyes gazed into hers. Light played on the tops of his high cheekbones. “And what sort of things would we do, Turi?”

“I’m well aware of what mates do together.” Her brows snapped together at the silky tone of his voice. If he thought he could break down her resolve with that low, gravelly voice, he was wrong. “We’re educated on that , at least, so we’re not surprised when our mate takes us into bonding. It wouldn’t work. We’re not even the same species.”

He raised one brow. “It would most definitely work, Turi, but I agree with you on one point.”

“What is that?” Her chin came up.

“The Axis don’t permit overseers to have relations with Terians.” He swallowed and his eyes lit with something new—vulnerability. “So if we decide to continue what began in the library, we need to be very careful that they don’t find out.”

She tilted her head. “How does that work? Do the Axis have spies here? Do they watch you?”

He reached up and rubbed a spot behind his ear. Through his thick hair, she caught a glimpse of something shining, like metal on his head. “They don’t have spies here, and I’ve found no surveillance equipment. They leave me alone as long as everything goes smoothly in the settlements.”

Her belly tightened. “But things are not going smoothly in the settlements. It takes a big crisis for Riests to make the trek to your fortress, and one of those Riests was from a settlement other than mine.” She squeezed his hands, feeling his rapid heartbeat beneath her knuckles. The urge to lean into him was so strong, she shuddered. “We can’t risk it.”

He closed his eyes as a look of agony crossed his features and he seemed to come to a decision. “You’re right, my wise female. We can’t. As much as I desire otherwise, I will not touch you again.” Still, he drew her hands up to his mouth and kissed her fingers. “I will not have you taken from my side, even if I must deny the feelings I have for you.”

It was a surprise to hear him put it so plainly. Turi drew in a breath, taking in his words and their meaning. He was confessing something, here. Something big. He wanted her with him, no matter what. And he wanted her as more than a friendly companion. The attraction she felt was shared. He wanted her, desired her.

He stepped back, releasing her hands and the break of contact left an ache that Turi gasped from. “It’s for the best if we not see each other,” she said, her throat tight. “I can read very well on my own, now.”

“Yes, you can.” He sounded like he was in pain. “If this is what you wish, I respect it. Knowing you are here in the fortress with me will have to be enough, at least for now. The library is yours, of course. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to tell Ara so she can inform me.”

She felt numb, lost, chest tightening around her heart like a shrinking cage. “Thank you. I will.”

He shifted away, toward the door. “Answer me one question.”

“Yes?” Her voice was breathless.

“If the Axis didn’t exist and we were free to do as we wished, would you still be sending me away?”

Turi closed her eyes. Just the thought of a reality such as that brought on tears of longing. Her answer was simple. Honest. “No.”

“I see.” His voice was edged with steel. “Thank you, Turi.”

And he was gone, leaving her with those words, which felt oddly unresolved. What did he mean by that question? The Axis did exist, and they would forever be at the center of their lives. They had always been up there, a swirling vortex in the sky, and they were not going anywhere. Neither were Ellion and Turi. Whatever may have started in the library was finished. Turi tossed the botched dough into the recycler and began cleaning up the mess she’d made. Cleaning up the mess of her heart would be another matter.