Chapter 28

CHAPTER 28

Connor flung himself on his bunk with a groan. He wanted to go back in there and declare his feelings, all of them, beg her to be his–but he had promised her, not until after Perez. Fucking Perez. The morning couldn’t come fast enough.

He rolled onto his side and closed his eyes. He was exhausted, and he would need to be up before dawn to prepare for their second and hopefully more successful attack on the Esperanza. Best if he got some sleep now.

A second twofingers of scotch sent Callista back to bed after Connor left.

She woke to a knock on her door. Dragging herself out of bed and pulling on a banyan she muttered, “better not be you Irish!”

It wasn’t. It was Chen. Letting her bosun in she shut the door and with her arms wrapped tightly round herself she said, “What is it, Chen? More damage than we thought?”

“Sorry to disturb you, Captain. But there is a conversation I think you should know about.”

A cold shiver of premonition raced over Callista’s skin.

“What is it?”

Chen looked uncomfortable. “I hear Wade and Furness talking.”

“Yes?”

“About conversation between Furness and Mor.” She cocked her head in the quartermaster’s cabin’s direction. “Wade overheard it. She was threatening to reveal it to me. I waited until Furness went then I talked to Wade, got the full details.”

Callista waited, her heart thudding heavily in her chest and a sick feeling in her stomach. “Go on.”

“It was on the morning of the ballot. Furness tried to persuade Mor to drop out of the ballot. Furness accused him of-” Chen stopped, clearly uncomfortable.

Callista waved for her to continue. “Say whatever it is Chen.”

“He said Mor have hot pants for you. Said Mor is molly for you.”

Callista smiled ironically. Well Fury wasn’t so wrong about that, was he?

“Mor said no, he is wrong. He said ‘She wants me. I’ll have her eating out of my hand in no time, and when I do...’ Wade said he held out his hand palm up and closed it into a fist. And he said ‘The ship will belong to me’” Chen stopped, swallowing as if she tasted something bad.

Callista listened to the words, and they rang true even as they speared her heart. So, Mor had played her? Or thought he had? She swallowed the tightness in her throat and blinked the sting from her eyes. He almost did. He almost did. She almost believed that he loved her. She almost gave him her heart, poor broken thing that it was, in return.

“Thank you, Chen, thank you for telling me.”

“What you want me to do about Mor? Lock him up?”

She hesitated and then shook her head. They needed him for the boarding tomorrow. She’d deal with him after Perez. “No, I’ll deal with him myself thanks. Don’t repeat this to anyone will you. Not even Juana?”

“Aye Captain.” Chen bowed and left.

Callista walked blindly to the desk and fumbled with the decanter. She didn’t bother with a glass this time. She up ended the decanter and took two large swallows of the fiery amber liquid. She was tempted to finish the lot, but she had a job to do tomorrow and being hungover for it wasn’t an option. She put the decanter away and at the same time she turned the lock on her heart.

She had been right to be wary of Mor. All men were bastards. All men would let you down sooner or later. All men were liars and cheats. Manipulators, users, selfish, self-serving charming arseholes!You have been a fool yet again. When will you ever learn?

She leaned on the desk as a sob escaped her throat and she bent double with the pain. She slipped to the deck, curling round the leg of the desk and sobbed, trying to stifle the agonised sounds with her hand, the other clutched to her chest where the pain was so sharp it almost took her breath away.

Connor didn’t knowwhat woke him, but then he heard the muffled sound of sobbing. Coming from Callista’s cabin. He was up and through the door of her cabin almost before he’d formed the thought.

She was curled round the leg of the desk, wrapped only in a banyan, sobbing her heart out.

“Callista!” He crossed the room in two strides and pulled her up into his arms cradling her against his chest. “Love what is it? What’s wrong?”

She came to vicious life, twisting out of his embrace and slapped him hard with her open hand. “You bastard!”

She scrabbled away from him and got to her feet. She looked like a wild woman, her hair standing out in a tangled mess round her head, her face blotched and red from crying, her expression one of such hatred it hit him in the chest like a death blow.

“Callista what-”

“Get out!” she screamed at him. She dove for her locker and came at him with a knife.

Automatically he rose, bringing his hands up and grabbed her wrist, forcing her to let go of the knife with a grunt.

“What’s wrong? What do you think I’ve done?” he gripped her shoulders and shook her lightly trying to break through the madness that had her in its grip.

She panted, wiping her face. “You lied! All a lie! You thought you could seduce me and take the ship from me. You two-faced, lying, Irish bastard!” She beat his chest with her fists.

And he let her, staring down into her crazed eyes. Someone had told her about the conversation he had with Furness the day of the ballot. He felt sick remembering his cockiness, his confidence that he could seduce her and get control of the ship. It hadn’t turned out that way, had it?

“Yes,” said hoarsely.

She went white, except for the red blotchy bits. “You admit it?”

“No! I mean, yes, I said those things but -” I’ve realised since then I was wrong! So wrong! But he didn’t get a chance to say it.

She shoved him viciously hard in the chest and brought her knee up at the same time and got him square in the cods. The excruciating pain made him cry out and double over.

“Fuck, Callista!” he gasped.

“Get out!” she said again. “I’ll deal with you later!” She made it sound like a threat. He straightened, his groin on fire and not in a good way. Pulsing stabs of pain made him feel sick, but he ignored it, grabbing her hands and holding her just far enough away that she couldn’t knee him again.

“Callista, let me explain!”

“No!” she shook her head. “You can’t sweet talk your way out of this one! I won’t fall for your blarney again. You don’t get to let me down twice, Irish. You’re done after tomorrow. You’re lucky I don’t cut your cods off now and shove them down your fucking throat!”

“You wouldn’t!” He held her eyes with his, his mouth lifted faintly at the corners.

“I would!” She insisted, but her lips twitched.

“You wouldn’t,” he whispered and kissed her. She stiffened in his embrace, but she didn’t push him away. She didn’t kiss him back either. He broke the kiss reluctantly, and she sagged a bit in his arms. He pulled her close and murmured against her hair. “There’s an explanation Callista, I promise you.”

“I don’t want to hear it.” she said her voice dull and heavy against his chest.

“I’ll tell you after -” he stroked her hair.

“Perez,” she finished for him.

“You’ll listen then?” He pulled back to look at her face.

“I don’t know.” She avoided his gaze, she looked weary.

His heart cracked. God, I’ve hurt her. How to make up for it? What can I do or say to undo this damage? I can’t lose her, I just can’t.

“Go away Irish. I’m tired and I’ve got a villain to kill tomorrow. I need some sleep.”

He swallowed, fighting the instinct to insist she listen to him now. He’d make it worse if he forced her now. Once we deal with Perez, together, things will be better. God knows how dangerous tomorrow is going to be. I have to protect her.

He kissed her forehead. “Good night me love,” he said softly and left her.