Chapter 17

CHAPTER 17

A s Minna had suspected, Lorna was devastated. At first she had been anxious, then frightened, but after a few days of trying to keep her hopes up and fending off her fears, she had almost given up. She was terrified, too, that she would lose her home, since she no longer had employment as Minna's maid. However, Jamie was not interested enough in his sister's doings to even notice her existence, so Lorna merely kept to Minna's quarters and stayed out of his way.

She was unable to even ask about Minna's welfare for fear of giving herself away, so she sat for days fretting and worrying, making up dark, gloomy scenarios in her mind during the day and enduring nightmares in her sleep. When she had finally endured almost three days of this, she decided that she needed some fresh air and exercise, so she crept down the servants' stairs past the stables and made her way down to the long slope of grass that led down to the loch.

It was around midday, the wind had died down, and the clouds were giving way to a bright white haze that was neither cloud nor sunlight. Lorna had made her way down to the loch and was sitting by the side leaning her head on her knees. She had prayed until her knees were on fire and her head ached, but with no result. She told herself to accept the inevitable; Minna, her best friend whom she had served for years, was gone, probably at the hand of her vicious brother.

Lorna could not continue skulking in the castle for months, and she had nowhere else to go. Without Minna, she had nothing to live for. She laid her head down on her knees and sighed, seeing no hope for the future.

That was when Minna caught sight of her. "Lorna!" she cried joyfully. "Lorna!" She picked up her pace and rushed to her friend's side, then almost hauled her to her feet. "I am so glad to see you!"

For a long moment Lorna froze, completely astonished, then she cupped Minna's face in her hands, staring at her in disbelief, then kissed her. "Minna!" she cried, her eyes filling with tears, "Oh, darlin', I thought ye were dead!" She wrapped her arms around Minna's waist and burst into tears. "I thought I would never see ye again!"

By this time Minna was weeping too, and the two women clung together for a long time before drawing apart and looking at each other. Lorna shook her head. "It's well seen naebody has been lookin' after ye!" she said, smiling. "Your hair looks like a bird's nest!"

Minna giggled, then kissed her friend's cheek. "I am sorry, Lorna. I will try to do better. I have never been so happy to see anyone in my whole life. I am sorry you were so worried."

"What happened?" Lorna asked, mystified. "I was worried sick."

"I am sorry, Lorna, but it was truly not my fault," Minna replied. "Jamie pushed me into the loch."

"What?" Lorna's voice was high with disbelief. "You mean he wanted tae kill ye?"

"He ambushed me when I left you that day," she replied. "We had a great big fight and he pushed me into the water. I almost drowned."

"He what?" Lorna was furious. "Deliberate, like?"

Minna shrugged. "I don't know, Lorna," she answered, "but he has not sent anyone to find me. I almost drowned, but someone pulled me out."

"Who?" Lorna asked, frowning.

Minna paused for a moment. Should she tell her friend Gowan's identity? If she did, she knew that Lorna would keep his secret, but it could put her in danger.

Lorna saw her hesitation. "Ye can trust me hen," she said earnestly.

"I know," she replied, "but I don't want you to come to any harm over it. My brother knows dangerous people, and what you don't know you can't tell."

"Where are ye stayin'?" Lorna asked anxiously. "Did ye have a roof over your heid all this time?"

"Again, I can't tell you that, Lorna," Minna replied, shaking her head. "I will not risk any harm coming to you." Then she had a thought. "What are you going to do? Has Jamie not asked you to leave?"

"I think he has forgotten about me," Lorna answered. "I am stayin' as quiet as I can till he throws me out, because he will remember me in the end."

"We will have to make a plan." Minna thought for a moment. "And I must go and see Jamie."

Lorna was horrified. "No! Minna! He tried tae kill ye!" she cried. She took Minna by the shoulders and shook her. "Dinnae go near him!"

Minna scowled. "I have to, Lorna," she said grimly. "I might die in the attempt, but someone has to stand up to him. This can't go on."

"Then let somebody else stand up tae him!" Lorna begged. "Ye cannae throw your life away like this, Minna!"

"I will not be throwing it away, Lorna," Minna replied. "The one good thing my father did for me was teach me how to defend myself, and I can handle a sword as well as most men."

"But your brother is a big strong man, Minna!" Lorna reminded her. "He willnae have too much trouble disarmin' ye. Think, lass! He is a nasty cruel man, an' if ye fight wi' him ye will be throwin' your life away!"

"I have thought of that, Lorna," Minna said patiently. "And about what the villagers will do when I am gone. If the worst comes to the worst, I will not be around to help them, but you will."

"I will have naewhere tae live," Lorna pointed out. "I have nae family, ye know that."

"The people of Cairndene will take you in," Minna replied. "I made a plan a long time ago in case something like this happened. In my chamber, you will find a secret drawer in one of my bureaus with a pouch with a few sovereigns in it. I was keeping them for a dire emergency, but I think this may be it, so perhaps this is the time I should tell you where it is."

Minna took Lorna's hands and looked into her eyes. "I love you, my sweet friend, and if anything happens to me I want you to sell all my dresses, all my jewelry, and anything else that will bring money in for the villagers and the farmers here.

You will find the minister in the church, Reverend Patterson, very helpful in this regard. There are many hypocrites out there, Lorna, but he is not one of them. He is one of the most truly kind and honest people I have ever met, and before he became a minister he was a bookkeeper, so he knows exactly what he is doing." She paused and took a deep breath. "I know that this is hard for you, but I want you to go back to the castle and begin to pack up my possessions."

"But Minna -" Lorna began, before Minna put a finger to her lips to silence her. "You will not change my mind, my friend," she said gently, then smiled. "Go now and don't let Jamie see you."

Once more they put their arms around each other and hugged for a long time.

"Is there nothin' I can say to make ye change your mind?" Lorna said.

Minna shook her head. "It is made up, Lorna. I will not change it."

Lorna saw the determination in her eyes.

"Take care, lovie." Lorna said softly. Then she ran towards the castle, not looking back.

Minna turned to the loch again. It used to be so beautiful, she thought, and now it was a place of horror for her, but she reasoned that if she faced it enough the feeling would go away. However, she could still not venture close to it. ‘You must always face your fears,' she thought, then a bolt of terror shot through her as she remembered what she would be doing in a little while.

Suddenly she felt a heavy hand on her shoulder, and started in fright, then she looked up into Gowan's dark eyes.

Gowan came back to the cottage carrying a brace of rabbits and a little sackful of wild mushrooms, expecting to find Minna there. However, when he walked into the cottage there was no sign of her, and he looked around, baffled. The structure of the locks was such that she could not leave once the outside lock was bolted, but she had evidently managed it somehow. ‘I should have known.' he thought wryly, shaking his head. He knew, even on short acquaintance, that she was not only beautiful, but fearsomely intelligent.

Gowan dropped his catch on the floor and put the hood of his cloak up again. He was ravenous, and had wanted to begin skinning and eating the rabbits straight away, but he had more pressing matters to worry about now. Where was Minna?

He left the cottage again and began to sprint through the woods, heading for the castle. It did not take long to find her. Instead of walking towards the castle, Minna was sitting thoughtfully looking at the loch, her arms wrapped around herself, seemingly mesmerized.

"What are you doing here?" he asked angrily, putting his hand on her shoulder as he knelt down beside her. "Your brother's guards could come and drag you back to him at any moment."

"Take your hand off me, please!" she replied, batting it off her shoulder angrily. "I am going to face my brother! His evil can't be allowed to continue, and I will do my best to put a stop to it!"

Gowan stared at her in disbelief, shaking his head. "But you can't do that! Are you mad? I thought when you told me this before you had listened to my advice, but now I see that you are just as misguided as before. You will be committing suicide!" He looked down at her and realized that he would be bereft if anything happened to Minna. He had only known her a few days, but already he had begun to care about her.

Perhaps it was because she had she had assuaged his loneliness, or perhaps it was because she attracted him so much on a physical level, but he did not want to see any harm come to her. She was in particular danger because her monstrous brother, who should have been protecting her, was her enemy. He growled inwardly. Why would she not see sense?

"You are a coward," Minna said contemptuously, her voice throbbing with anger. "You lived like a hermit for years rather than helping your clan! I don't wish to speak to you any longer! Get away from me!" She gave him a firm push and he took a step back towards the loch, but he was too far away to fall into the water.

Gowan reached forward and grabbed her hand, then looked down at her, his eyes begging. He could not leave matters like this. In one last desperate attempt to make her stay he kissed her, almost savagely.

Minna tried to resist him for all of a second, but her efforts were futile. She was furious, but her anger only seemed to fuel the passion inside her, and in a few more seconds their bodies were fused together again, lips locked in a desperate kiss.

Gowan wanted it to go on forever, but it could not, and when Minna broke the kiss he felt a plunging sense of disappointment which fled as soon as the flat of her hand hit his cheek.

"I am going to see my friends - they have more respect for me than you do!"

Minna gave him a glare that would have felled a lesser man then walked away. She glanced over her shoulder once to make sure he was not following her, but Gowan was standing in the same spot, immobile, watching her but doing nothing.

Minna broke into a run. She was using her fury as a weapon, because she did not wish to think of what could have been had she stayed with the man she had just left. It was simply not meant to be, she told herself, and that was the end of it.