Chapter 18

18

" K eira." Murdoch leaned across the space between the two horses and caught her hand in his, then smiled at her. "I know you are worried about your responsibilities, but you need not be. We are safe now that your father is dead, and we are going to a place for us and all the others, somewhere we can not only survive but grow.

"Most of the guards have come with us, so we can protect ourselves, and even if we are ever besieged, there is plenty of food in the sea."

He looked down at the five-year-old little boy, Duncan, whom he was cradling in front of him as he rode toward the sea. He had been orphaned in the fighting, but Murdoch knew that he would not be an orphan for long because the community he would be living in would become his family. He would be in mourning for a long time, but he would never lack love.

The little lad was fast asleep, and Keira could not help seeing Murdoch as the father of the small boy whose fair hair was shining like gold in the fiery rays of the setting sun. It was exactly the same color as Murdoch's.

He would be such a good father, she thought. He was so gentle with the children, yet he was playful and made them laugh too. They had all stood in line waiting for him to give them rides on his shoulders when they stopped for a bite to eat. He rolled on the grass with them and let them ride on his back like a horse, too, and let them feed him with little spoons as if he were a baby. If one of them fell and hurt himself, they would run to him and he would give them bear hugs and make them laugh again.

Presently, the little boy turned in his sleep and mumbled something, looking as though he was having a bad dream. Murdoch turned the lad in his arms and nestled him into his chest, where he cuddled closer and resumed his sound sleep. Then he kissed the top of his head and hugged him a little more tightly.

Keira herself was nestling a little girl called Ailie in her arms as she rode along, and a feeling of great tenderness rose within her as she looked down at the little, round, innocent face. Perhaps one day she would be hugging her own child this way.

Murdoch wanted to marry her, and of course she wanted the same thing, but was she ready? Their immediate goal now was survival, hers and everyone else's. Yet if she was even going to entertain the thought of marriage, it would be to Murdoch, and she would only bear his children. However, there was much to be done before that happened.

She lapsed into silence, watching as the sky grew darker, wondering if they would have to camp for the night somewhere. The wind was strengthening, and clouds were gathering on the horizon. Then, suddenly, the landscape began to look familiar.

"We have arrived at the place I told you about," Keira said, smiling.

As they reached the brow of the hill, Murdoch was amazed to see that built into the hill was what remained of a castle, but it was not like any other she had ever seen. It was more of a fortress than a castle and seemed to grow out of the cliff face since the foundations of the structure reached all the way down to the shore, with the uppermost towering above the grasslands above.

The structure above was flat and featureless on the seaward side, but Murdoch could see that behind it was a multitude of towers and crenelated battlements, and as they rounded the curve of the bay, they saw the building's full crumbling splendor. It had been empty for many years, and the wind, rain, and snow had done their work of stripping away much of the smoothly carved stonework, rendering it pitted and worn.

The castle had no moat, just a deep pit and a tall iron railing that ran all the way around the structure. However, the pit was overgrown with native bushes, and the railings had not been painted in years and had been almost entirely eaten away with rust so that if anyone leaned against them, they would give way and disintegrate. It had already happened in several places.

The enormous gates at the entrance were standing open, and they could see that weeds were growing through the flagstones in the courtyard in abundance. Beyond that they could see that the ceiling in the atrium had caved in, allowing rain, snow, and dirt to form a pile of soil where a few little trees had begun to grow. Nothing more was visible after that. In terms of size, it was not a big building, but it was impressive nonetheless. The place must have been more than a hundred feet tall and must have taken years and years to build.

"I have heard that it was built by the Allens," Keira said, "but it is at least five hundred years old and nobody really knows for sure. I heard that it was once attacked and besieged, but I have no idea by whom or even if the story is true. Anyway, as I told you, it belongs to me now."

Keira suddenly felt a surge of pride.

"We must find a way inside it and then we can examine it, but first we must clear the way and build a drawbridge," Murdoch said, then he turned back to her, grinning. "With your permission, of course, milady."

"You may do so," Keira replied, her eyes twinkling.

Murdoch called two of the women to take care of the children he and Keira were both carrying, and Keira watched to make sure that they were being held safely.

"Dinnae worry, mistress," Maureen McMillan, a sturdy woman in her middle years, cuddled the little girl to her ample bosom. "I have five o' my own, an' now I have six. She wilnae want for love."

Tears pricked Keira's eyes as she watched both of the children being carried away to new homes and families. Before she had met Murdoch, she had told herself over and over again that she would never be married and have children, but as she watched the departure of the orphans, she realized something: how much her life had been blighted by seeing the death of her mother.

All of a sudden it became blindingly obvious, and she felt a weight lift from her shoulders as the shadow of her father retreated behind her. Why should he dictate her life from the grave? Why should she not fall in love, bear children, and live a lifetime of contentment? Why should she deny herself all that because a cruel, selfish man had taken her life away from her? She was free of him now, free to live and love as she wished—with anyone she wanted.

She looked across at Murdoch, who had called a group of men to help him. They were all looking down into the pit, forming a plan to get rid of the vegetation and lay a bridge over the gap to get to the castle.

"Doesnae look like much o' a job," Rory Galbraith remarked, kneeling down beside the edge of the pit. "Hack away these bushes, chop down a tree, saw it intae planks, an' lay it over the the hole."

Murdoch cast his eyes heavenward. "Rory, do you know how many thistles and how much gorse is in there? You will be ripped to shreds!"

He pointed into the pit, where the beautiful lemon yellow spiky blossoms of the gorse bushes shone innocently from amongst the other foliage. The thistles were not yet blooming, but they were equally deadly. The other men stood laughing amongst themselves.

"Aye, an' thistles dinnae let go o' ye very easily," Rob Brown told him.

Rory looked down into the spiky mass, nodding slowly. "We will have tae set fire tae it then," he said, sighing.

This was not an enviable task since the damp, burning plant material would smoke for a long while and make everyone in the area cough and splutter for days. However, it had to be done.

First, though, they had to eat.

Keira had gone to find Adaira, who was having a cooking lesson from Ada Johnstone, the butcher's wife. She had just shown her how to pluck, skin, and joint a pigeon, and she had discovered that preparing the food that she always received on a porcelain plate was not as easy as eating it. Disemboweling birds was not a task for the faint of heart, but she managed to hang on to the contents of her stomach. However, it took a heroic act of will to do it, and she felt as though she was turning green.

Keira was fortunate in having been given some basic cooking lessons, so she was not quite as helpless as her friend.

"Come, let me help you," she said fondly. "You will have to accustom yourself to all this because you will not have any servants as a member of the working class!"

Adaira laughed. "No more ceilidhs at the castle, then? No more fine wine and whiskey?"

"Is that bird no' ready yet?" Dougie's voice was teasing as he came up behind Adaira and looked over her shoulder. "I heard what ye said, Addie. The laird is dead, an' he doesnae spread his evil in the castle anymore, so it can be used for more useful things than havin' parties an' keepin' him in fine style. Nay guards will be needed. I will become a crofter and a fisherman."

He smiled at the two women, but his gaze lingered longer on Adaira, and Keira smiled as she thought of them together.

"When I was leader of the rebels, they stood over my shoulders and forced me to do this!" she laughed. "I cannot tell you how many times I nearly chopped my fingers off slicing turnips! But you must learn to cook. It is a most useful skill, and not just for women."

Adaira looked up at Dougie as if for his approval, and he nodded. Then he turned and walked away, but Keira did not miss the way Adaira's eyes followed the tall, broad figure. Then she turned back to Keira, looked at the pigeon, covered her mouth, and ran away to the edge of the forest, where she was violently sick. When she had wiped her mouth, she walked back to Keira's side, but the sight and smell of the bird made her retch again.

"Are you quite well, Addie?" Keira asked worriedly. "You look very pale. Are you sickening for something?"

"No." Adaira shook her head firmly. "I am just not used to the sight of raw meat, but I must become used to it if I wish to live amongst ordinary folk, and I really want to do that, Keira. I cannot tell you what a pleasure it is to be with honest, hardworking people who do not care if you always look impeccable, who tell you the truth and accept you for what you are.

"You know what things are like in our world. People say one thing to your face and another behind your back. You never know where you stand. But these folk accept me for what I am and help me to fit into a society which I am still finding a little strange. No one has judged me at all, even though I am a member of a set of people who mostly look down on them, as I am sorry to say that I used to." She shook her head in disbelief. "I am so happy to be here among ordinary, common people, where I know I belong. I will have to work hard, and perhaps I will not always enjoy it, but I will be better for it."

"I am so glad!" Keira smiled at her. "I feel that way too." She looked down at her hands ruefully. "I would hug you, Addie, but my hands are covered in blood."

"Then I will hug you."

Adaira threw her arms around her friend, but in doing so, she smelled the pigeon blood again. It was time for another trip to the woods!