Chapter 16

Sixteen

When I wake, I roll over and reach out for Bran but find the bed empty beside me.

The windows are still shuttered so it’s impossible to tell what time it is.

I stretch for the bedside table and pat around in the dark for my phone. When the screen lights up, I read 4:00 p.m.

That’s early for Bran. Late for me.

My Pledge is in three hours.

I flop to my back, air rushing out of the thick pillows and surrounding me with Bran’s scent.

Today is the day when everything changes.

If all goes according to plan, by the end of the day, I will officially be a member of the Duval Vampire House.

I will be Bran’s and there will be no turning back.

My brain is telling me I should be freaking out. It’s a lifetime commitment. But my heart and my gut are telling me this is exactly where I should be.

If only there was a better way to guarantee my sister’s safety without her having to make the very permanent transition to vampire.

In the dark hush of Bran’s bedroom, my mother’s words echo in my head.

The things you did, Jessie…you were only a year old and it terrified me.

What could I do at such a young age to terrify my mother enough that she bound me?

And now that I’m twenty-one…

I place my hand over my beating heart and wish someone could just tell me these terrifying things I’m capable of.

Maybe if I knew, I could help protect my sister.

Because the fae gate has been closed since I was born, my knowledge of them and their abilities is minimal.

We are two days away from the new moon Rita said she needed to undo the binding, but…is it possible to weaken it?

I sit upright in bed as a thought comes to me.

Whenever my necklace is off, the taste of fae is much stronger in my blood. Bran said maybe when the necklace is off, the magic thins.

I toss the blanket back and click on the bedside lamp. I don’t hear much beyond the bedroom.

I dress quickly in jeans and a t-shirt, then slip on a pair of tennis shoes.

Out in the main part of the Anneliese, I find my sister in the kitchen making a cup of coffee.

“Hey,” I say. “How are you?”

She looks tired, but there’s a new glow to her cheeks.

“I’m okay,” she says. “You?”

I shrug. “Impatient for today to be over.”

She brings the mug to her mouth and breathes across it, stirring the steam. “You and me both.”

“Where’s Bran?”

“He and Damien are in the main house discussing strategy for today.”

I worry at my bottom lip, contemplating what I’m about to do. Bran will be pissed. But his anger is worth it if I can help my sister. I suspect I only know the half of what she’s done to protect me since Mom died.

“I’m gonna go to the main house,” I tell Kelly. “If you see Bran before I do, will you let him know?”

“Sure.” Kelly’s gaze is distant and glassy as she takes another sip from the coffee.

“Thanks.”

She doesn’t respond, which is just as well considering what I’m about to do.

Somehow, I make it out of Duval House without anyone questioning me. I find the Bimmer in the parking lot and drive off without any trouble at all. I feel a little guilty as Duval House fades in the rear-view mirror.

Since it’s mid-afternoon, I know I can probably find Rita at the coffeeshop.

I park outside and head in, the bells chiming above the door when I open it.

Rita looks up. “Jessie, hi. Happy birthday!” She frowns, then adds, “What are you doing here?”

“I need a favor.”

The frown deepens and aged lines appear on her forehead. “Why do I have a bad feeling about this favor?”

I scan the coffee shop and spot a few witches, none of them close allies of Rita’s house, the Bowens. “Can we talk in the back?”

“Sure.” Rita passes by Gwen and gives her a squeeze on the shoulder. “I’ll be back out in a bit. Let me know if you need me.”

“Will do.” Gwen smiles at me.

In Rita’s office, my skin crawls when I see the mess on her desk.

Don’t look at it. You’re here for a very specific reason and that reason is not to organize Rita’s office.

“Remember when I came here to ask about the necklace and the binding and you said we needed a new moon to undo it?”

Rita folds her arms over her chest. “Of course.”

“Whenever I take off this necklace”—I finger the charm hanging from the chain—“the magic is distant. I know that because Bran can taste fae blood when he bites me.”

Rita turns her office chair and plops into it. “What are you asking?”

“Is there any way to undo the binding early?”

“Well, sure, we could try, but a spell that old, I’d much rather err on the side of caution and do it right the first time.”

My stomach drops. I pace the small room. “Is there a way for you to take the necklace and help distance the magic? Like some kind of neutralizing spell or something?”

What I don’t say is—is there a way for me to tap into my terrifying power today ?

But I think Rita probably knows that.

Maybe not the terrifying part.

Rita thinks this over, her hands folded on top of a pile of crinkled receipts. “I suppose it’s possible, but…” She looks up at me. “Is this because of your Pledge and the rumblings I’ve been hearing about it?”

I bite at the corner of my lip, considering how much to tell her. I know I can trust Rita, but I’m not sure Cal wants everyone knowing he has a psychic.

“The Renshaw witches are working with Julian and we think they’re planning something for my Pledge and I don’t want anyone to get hurt in the crossfire.”

“You don’t even know what your power is,” Rita points out. “You wouldn’t know the first thing about using it.”

“But could I? With whatever spell you do? That’s what I need to know.”

If I could use the power when I was just a year old, then surely I can use it when I’m twenty-one. I just need to have access to it.

“I mean…theoretically, yes,” she says. “A binding is a current just like any other magic. So yes, I think I could dam it temporarily until we can really undo it. But Jessie...what you’re asking me is dangerous and extremely reckless.”

“All of this is happening because of me. I need to be an active part of this, Rita. Actively defending those I love.”

She pursues her lips, breathing out heavily through her nose.

“Bran will probably kill me,” she says with a weary laugh.

“Let me handle Bran.”

She arches a brow. “Well, all right. I suppose you want to do this now?”

“My Pledging is in three hours. It needs to be now.”

Out in the shop, the steamer hisses as Rita gets up. She goes to her shelves and slips her reading glasses on, scanning the jars that are haphazardly arranged. She finally selects one that is full of a mixture of dark herbs and what looks like crushed crystals.

“Take off your necklace,” she says as she brings the jar down.

I undo the clasp and the chain tickles my skin as it slides off my neck. When I hold it out, the charm spins from the end.

Rita takes it and then pops off the lid of the jar, placing the necklace inside. “I’ll need some blood. Not a lot.”

“All right.”

She sets the jar on her desk and pulls a jeweled dagger from a drawer. I hold out my hand for her and she drags the blade over the palm of my hand, biting into my flesh.

I hiss and instinctively want to pull away but hold my hand steady in her warm grip.

Once blood wells in the wound, she turns my hand over to the mouth of the jar and several drops patter into the herbs and stones and covers the binding charm.

“That should be good,” Rita says and nods at a box of tissue on the filing cabinet.

I pull a few out and press them to the wound as Rita whispers to herself, holding the jar in her grip.

A flame immediately ignites inside, tendrils of smoke and fire dancing over the rim.

Rita whispers one final word, then clamps the lid on, snuffing the flame.

My skin tingles.

A shiver creeps across my shoulders.

I lick my lips, still tasting the bite of Rita’s magic on the air.

“Is that it?” I ask as blood soaks through the tissue.

“That’s it.”

“Did it work?”

“I don’t know. Only you will.”

“I don’t feel different.”

Though I do feel naked without the necklace. I’ve rarely taken it off since I was a kid.

“I should go,” I say. “Bran will be wondering where I am soon.”

Rita nods. “I’ll be at your Pledging, just in case. You have me and the support of the entire Bowen house. Just so you know.”

“Thank you, Rita.”

I hurry to her side and wrap her in a hug. Beyond the magic, she smells like coffee and tea and warmth and familiarity.

“I really, really appreciate you.”

When I pull back, her eyes are glistening. “That’s very sweet of you. Now go on. Before I have a cantankerous vampire breathing down my neck.”

I laugh as I leave. “I’m definitely going to use that someday. Bran’s going to love it.”

I keep checking my phone all the way back to Duval House, half expecting to find a barrage of texts from Bran admonishing me for leaving.

But there are none.

I think he’s distracted. I think he and Damien are probably trying to plot for every contingency.

When I get back, I hurry in through a side door and avoid looking any of the vampires in the face as I pick up the pace for the Anneliese.

The house is empty when I walk through the front door.

I decide to shower and get ready. The earlier the better, I suppose. And I need the distraction.

What if Rita’s spell didn’t work? What if we try the unbinding on the new moon and it fails too? What if I never know who I am and what I’m capable of?

I suppose my mother warned me not to go down this road anyway.

I linger in the shower, soaking up the heat and scrubbing the blood from my hand.

I’m not sure if I should be surprised or relieved when I find the cut on my palm has vanished.

I’ve always healed quickly, but not that quickly.

The tingle returns, racing down my limbs, lifting goosebumps on my arms despite the intense heat of the water.

When I finish, I wrap a towel around myself and step out and find Bran waiting.

“Good morning, little mouse,” he says.

“Afternoon,” I correct.

“You start living with vampires, you’ll realize soon enough that afternoon and morning are interchangeable.”

He straightens as I come over to the vanity.

I sense his eyes on me.

“Where is your necklace?” he asks.

Inwardly, I groan. Of course he noticed. Nothing escapes Bran.

“I took it off.”

“Mouse.”

“Oh, don’t Mouse me. I’m allowed to take it off.”

“Where is it?”

“Not here.”

“Now is not the time for surprises.”

I want to help. I need to help.

If only I could figure out how to tap into this well inside of me. The one my mom said terrified her.

What can I do?

I meet my gaze in the mirror and try to dig up my secrets. I can’t sense magic inside of myself. I don’t even feel fae most of the time.

Who am I?

Who am I?

“Put the necklace back on,” Bran orders. “Right fucking now.”

I turn to him and clutch at the towel. “No.”

“Mouse.”

“I don’t have the necklace,” I say, anger tightening in my chest. “So I can’t put it back on.”

“I have vampire speed. I can retrieve it in ten minutes, tops.”

“I’m not putting it back on.”

“This was not part of the plan.”

“You didn’t let me be part of the plan. So I made my own.”

His eyes narrow, jaw flexing. “What do you know of war and strategy, little mouse? Nothing.”

“I’m not putting it?—”

The bedroom door opens and there’s a current of air as Jimmy appears in the bathroom doorway. She sees me in a towel and apologizes.

“It’s okay,” I say.

“What is it?” Bran asks, his words biting.

“The pack is here.”

“Which wolf is it? The Alpha?”

Jimmy cants her head and her chain earrings swing. “You’re not listening to me. I said, the pack is here. As in, the entire pack .”

The surprise on Bran’s face is a delight. It takes a lot to catch him off guard.

“For what?” he says.

“The Alpha said he’s giving Jessie a personal escort to her Pledging.”

Bran scowls and starts for the door. “The fuck he is.”