Chapter 27 Captain Clarke

The day before their day trip to St. Lucia, Westly met Brock for lunch at their favorite bar. He told Luka to invite Charlie over and to order lunch for them. Luka didn’t seem bothered he couldn’t have lunch with him today. He’d looked relieved, but he also acted cold and standoffish. Last night, Luka told him he had a headache, and he wanted to sleep on his side. Alone. That was a big, red flag demanding Westly’s attention. As he looked around, Westly couldn’t shake the nagging feeling something was off. Hopefully, Luka would stick to his decision to explore the island and share the delicious cuisine in St. Lucia with him. But he feared Luka would come up with an excuse not to go.

When Westly walked into the bar, Brock waved him over to the table. He sat across from him.

“I ordered us fish and chips with sparkling water since we’re working.”

“Thanks. I need to talk to you about Luka.”

“What’s going on?”

“He’s acting like he doesn’t want a relationship anymore.”

“Are you being honest with him about everything?”

He sighed. “No. I need to tell him something really important, but I’m afraid our relationship will end.”

“I can’t help unless you tell me what information you’re holding back from him.”

“His lawyer called and said Luka is free to return to California. He got off on a technicality. If I tell him he’s free, he’ll leave.”

“You can’t hold him! That’s kidnapping! What the hell is wrong with you? Tell him before you go to Saint Lucia. If he wants to go home, then he leaves from there. If you really love him, you’ll set him free.”

“You’re right. I’ll tell him tonight. If he wants to leave, he can fly from Saint Lucia to LAX.”

“I don’t think he’ll leave. Speak to him from your heart, not your head, and be completely honest.”

“I will. He’s so important to me, I lost my mind. I just didn’t want him to leave now that he can. I thought we’d have a year to form a bond strong enough for him to stay.”

“Do the right thing. That’s all you can do.”

When it was dinner time, Westly picked up Luka and instead of going to the Captain’s Dining Room, he led Luka to the top deck of the ship. Westly found a secluded table under a bright rainbow umbrella, its cheerful shades a stark contrast to the turmoil in Westly’s stomach. Settling into the plush chair, Westly stole a glance at Luka. His smile, usually as bright as the Caribbean sun, was dimmed with a shadow of worry. This is it. Time to confess.

“There’s something I need to tell you about the court case,” Westly blurted, the words tumbling out before he could form a proper sentence. Luka’s smile vanished completely, replaced by a guarded expression. “The lawyer you hired, he…” Westly took a shaky breath, the words sticking in his throat like sand. “He got the charges dropped. You’re free to go back to California.” The last part came out in a rush, relief battling with a growing dread.

Silence stretched between them, heavy and suffocating. Westly stole another look at Luka, his eyes a stormy mix of confusion and betrayal.

“When did he call you?” His voice was a low growl, laced with a hurt that echoed in Westly’s own chest.

“Before we stopped at Sint Maarten. I should have told you as soon as I found out.”

“Why didn’t you?”

Shame burned a fiery trail down Westly’s throat. “I…I was scared,” he confessed, his voice barely a whisper. “Scared you’d leave if you knew you could.” The words hung heavy in the air, a pathetic excuse for Westly’s actions.

Luka’s face hardened further. “So, you kept me prisoner? Even after you knew I was free?”

The sting of Luka’s words was a harsh reminder of Westly’s stupidity. “No, no, that’s not it! This whole thing…it brought us closer, Luka. Made me realize how much I—”

“Don’t,” Luka cut Westly off. His voice was tight with barely contained fury. “Don’t say it, Westly. Not now.” He rose from his chair, his broad shoulders tense with suppressed emotion. “I need some time alone.”

A wave of despair threatened to topple Westly. I messed up, royally. But I can’t let him leave. Not now, not when I finally understand how much he means to me. Westly pushed himself up from the chair and followed Luka, determined to fight for the future he’d almost thrown away.

Westly followed Luka down the stairs and to his cabin. Luka unlocked his door and Westly shut the door after he was inside.

“Luka, wait!” Westly lunged after him before he went to the balcony, grabbing his arm. He spun around, his eyes blazing.

“What, Westly? What more could you possibly have to say?”

Westly took a deep breath, his voice hoarse. “I love you, Luka. More than anything. That’s why I…I didn’t want to lose you.” The words tumbled out, a desperate plea.

He stared at Westly with dark, haunted eyes, but his face was unreadable. Then, slowly, the anger seemed to drain away, replaced by a flicker of something softer. Westly hoped he would forgive him yet again for what he had done. Brock had called his behavior kidnapping. Did I kidnap my beautiful lover to keep him here? Was he my prisoner? Was I still punishing him for being involved with my house burning? I’m incapable of loving another.

“This isn’t love. If you loved me, you’d have told me the truth and set me free. How could you keep me as your prisoner?”

“I’m sorry. So sorry. I told you I don’t know how to do relationships. I know that is a bullshit excuse to keep your freedom from you. I just couldn’t bear you leaving me. I don’t know how to show you how much I love you. I feared you’d leave me. I need your help.”

“That’s what you said the last time you didn’t tell me about who you were.”

“You’re right. I did say that before, but this time the situation was so much more serious to me. You could leave and still can.”

“That’s right, I still can.”

“Let me make us a drink and we’ll talk more.”

“I need a drink, but talk more to you? I don’t know.”

“Please, Luka. You’re very important to me.”

Luka nodded and followed Westly to his side of the cabin.

“What do you want to drink?” Westly asked.

“Scotch on the rocks.”

Luka went to the balcony to wait. He doesn’t want to be in the same room as me. I don’t blame him. I fucked up! And now I’m going to lose him all because of my fear of him leaving.