Chapter 5

5

Julie

Damn, that had been… intense. Far more so than she'd expected it to be. She was doing her best to keep her head on straight, even though her body and hormones were humming. Keeping her guard up usually wasn't that difficult, but right now, she was desperately trying to shore up her walls. She hadn't been sure if Connor would be able to truly let go, but he had and in spectacular fashion.

Did she want more with him?

Absolutely.

Did she think it was a good idea?

She wasn't sure.

A lot depended on how he reacted. Whether or not he could deal with submitting rather than being the one in charge. Just because he was submissive didn't mean he'd be ready to submit. Letting go like that could be scary. It put him in a very vulnerable position. One he might not want to stay in.

The fact he'd jumped right to taking care of himself at the end of the scene indicated he might already be trying to regain control over the situation. It could mean something, or it could mean nothing.

Don't jump to conclusions.

He might not want me.

But she wanted him to still want her.

Since he was still staring silently at her, rather than stammering or trying to excuse himself, she took the lead.

"I enjoyed that." It was always best to begin with a compliment. She smiled at him, so he knew she meant it. Her pussy was still humming from the aftereffects, though her stomach felt like it was roiling with anxiety. While it made her feel vulnerable to admit her enjoyment, he'd already made himself vulnerable to her, so it was only fair she returned the favor on some level. Especially since she was about to ask him to expose his emotions after being physically exposed. "Did you?"

It was hard not to let the need, the want, seep into that question, but she also didn't want to influence his answer.

Connor took a deep breath, dropping his gaze away from hers. Ashamed? Or just struggling to admit the truth because being so open was difficult? It could be either or both.

"Yes. I enjoyed it," he replied quietly. He lifted his head so he could look at her. "I would want to do it again."

Her smile widened.

"Good. Now, the next question is how you want to approach it. Scening again would mean seeing each other again. We could do it privately or at the club. I do understand the club would be more difficult for you." The idea of having to hide what she was doing twinged a little, especially since it would also curtail the amount she'd be able to talk to her friends. Connor had a right to privacy, though, especially as he made the transition.

"I don't mind telling people. I'm going to tell my friends, anyway. But… do we have to scene publicly?" The pained expression on his face tightened her chest.

It wasn't that he was ashamed of her, otherwise he wouldn't be willing to tell his friends, but just knowing he wanted it hidden brought up some triggers. She was self-aware enough to understand they had nothing to do with him and everything to do with her ex. Connor wasn't asking for anything unreasonable. In fact, he was offering quite a bit more than he had to.

"Absolutely not. Plenty of people don't scene publicly. That's what the private rooms are for." Though some did prefer to keep the doors and curtains on those rooms open, for voyeurs, Julie was perfectly happy to close them. She usually did so because she preferred privacy since most of the submissives she'd scened with didn't care.

"So, are we dating?" he asked.

Something inside her settled. That was more than she'd hoped for, but the truth was, she would like to get to know him better.

"Well, why don't we try a few dates and see how we feel." She patted his leg. "But we can scene together, regardless. There's certainly chemistry here, and if you'd like to explore submission, I am happy to be your guide."

"That sounds good to me." He relaxed completely, which helped her to relax, too. "I… I've liked you for a while."

"Oh, really?" she asked teasingly. "All the gifts you've been sending hadn't clued me in." She laughed as he blushed a beet red. He truly was incredibly cute, which wasn't normally an attribute she would think to describe for a man his size. "Trust me, I enjoyed all of it. Especially since Law was throwing such a fit. I assume you want to be the one to tell him you're my secret admirer?"

"I would rather he hear it from me," Connor admitted, giving her a sheepish look, seeming to understand that she'd be disappointed she wouldn't be able to be the one to do the big reveal. "So I can explain… everything."

Which was only fair. She and Law were friends, but not like he and Connor were. Besides, her desire was motivated by wanting to rub it in Law's face that not only had he been overreacting to the secret admirer thing but that the danger had been so lacking, it was actually one of his best friends.

"Just tell me one thing… was he part of the reason you knew when to send the gifts?"

The sheepish expression on his face grew even more so, but there was also a glint of mischievousness in his eyes. Oh, there was a little bit of a brat hiding in Connor's hulking exterior. That was good to know. Something to watch out for in the future.

The future being something she was suddenly very excited about. She wanted to know what made him tick. What he liked and didn't like. Where his boundaries were. All things that were going to need to be explored. She would definitely be pulling his file from the Dom class to go over what his responses had been.

Of course, it wouldn't be as thorough as if he'd taken the submission introduction course, but Master Patrick insisted the Doms experience as much of what a submissive went through physically as they could—everything from implements to plugs. The idea of pegging Connor…

Don't jump ahead of yourself. You've barely taken the first baby step with him. That might not be something he's into at all.

Though she didn't remember him protesting the plug the way some Doms did. Yes, she was definitely going to need to go back through his file.

Connor coughed.

"I, uh… yes." He shrugged. "Law would tell us what was going on at work, then I'd know where you were."

"I knew it." She pumped her fist in the air as the feeling of triumph suffused her. That made him laugh, which made her like him even more. There had been far too many times with her ex where he hadn't liked her shows of exuberance, even telling her that being occasionally silly diminished her and made him not want to submit to her. John had had a very specific idea of how a Domme should act, at least, a Domme he was willing to submit to. Though, no matter how poised and proper she'd been, he still hadn't wanted anyone to know he was submitting to her, so she wasn't sure why it had mattered. Or why she was thinking about him now.

She pushed him straight out of her thoughts as she grinned at Connor.

"You know Law is going to explode, right? Would you mind videotaping?"

That made him laugh again.

"I'm pretty sure that won't help at all." Connor shook his head, but that mischievous glint was still in his eyes.

"I'm not trying to help; I'm trying to be entertained."

She really, really liked making him laugh. She wished she could have kept entertaining him all night, but they both had to get going. The dining room needed to be cleaned.

Connor walked her out to her car. She thought about pulling him down for a kiss goodnight but decided against it. They exchanged numbers so they could try for another date and agreed to meet the next Friday for another scene.

One of the perks of working at Marquis, she happened to know there was a room free and was able to reserve it. Since she was teaching the classes, she could reserve an overnight for free whenever she wanted. A perk she'd never taken advantage of before, but it made sense now.

Of the two sister clubs, Marquis was far more private. If they were at Stronghold, eyes would be on them from the moment they walked through the door. Also, if they stayed at Marquis, it wouldn't feel quite so much like she had to hide what she was doing with him. Privacy was part of the package, not something that had to be deliberately set into place… which would be easier on her than feeling like he didn't want to be seen with her.

She wasn't sure where this would lead, if anywhere, but she was looking forward to finding out.

Connor

"You look happy."

Blinking, Connor gave himself a little shake. His mind had wandered off again in between clients, going back to the night before with Mistress Julie. The woman looking up at him now was a little taller than Mistress Julie and a little curvier, but she had a very similar expression. Searching, scrutinizing.

He'd been working with Sandra for about three years now, and he was used to the tiny whirlwind, also known as his work wife. She was happily married, and he got along well with her husband Marcus, but at work, she bossed him around as if he was a henpecked husband. In fact, he was pretty sure she didn't boss Marcus around nearly as much as she did him.

"What?" he asked, sidling away from her intense stare.

"I said that you look happy." Her gaze narrowed.

Damn, she really looked like Mistress Julie when she did that. Not that he'd ever want to say that out loud. He didn't think all Asian people looked alike; it was just true that these two particular Asian women looked alike. The main difference was that he was attracted to Mistress Julie whereas he could acknowledge that Sandra was an attractive woman, but he'd never been attracted to her.

"Doesn't he look happy, Aubrey?"

From behind the front desk, Aubrey looked up from whatever paperwork he was doing and inspected Connor's expression. He seemed to be having a good day today, which Connor was happy to see. He had a chronic condition called Arnold Chiari disease that sometimes gave him terrible headaches, but he liked being at the front desk of A2Z Physical Therapy and getting to interact with everyone coming in and out. The patients and all the PTs loved him.

"I look the way I always do," Connor insisted, rubbing his hand over his face, as if he could rub away whatever it was they were seeing. Sandra was nosy as hell, and she was going to want all the details if he gave her an inch.

"No, she's right. You look extra happy," Aubrey said, tilting his head and grinning up at them. His hazel eyes sparkled with mischief. "You're normally more… stoic."

"I don't know what either of you are talking about." Except that he did. He was happy because Mistress Julie had not only shown up, but she'd sat with him. Showed him what was possible.

He was still nervous as hell about telling his friends, but… maybe he could practice now. Sandra and Aubrey didn't know the details about the kink stuff, so they couldn't be mad at him for hiding anything from them. Both of them were staring at him now, letting the silence draw out, waiting for him to fill it. He sighed.

"I had… a date last night."

"And it went well!" Sandra squealed, bouncing up and down as she clapped her hands. "It went well, right? You wouldn't look happy if it didn't go well. What's her name? How old is she? Where'd you go?"

"No, no, and no." Connor pointed his finger at her. "I do not need you looking her up online."

"Just a first name then." Sandra smiled innocently at him, but he knew better than to believe that. He knew exactly why she wanted some of those details.

So did Aubrey.

"Don't trust her, man. She found Riley's new boyfriend with nothing more than knowing his name was ‘John.' I still don't know how she did it." Aubrey shook his head. "Do you know how many Johns there are in the world?"

"You're forgetting the part where I also saved her from dating a man with a wife and two kids he forgot to tell her about." Sandra put her hands on her hips, sniffing with annoyance at their lack of appreciation.

"She's not married, and she doesn't have kids," Connor said firmly.

Sandra's eyes lit up.

"You already knew her from somewhere. Okay, I can work with that."

"Sandra!"

She was already bustling away, reaching into her pocket to grab her phone, probably looking for some corner where she could start internet sleuthing. Connor sighed. Aubrey shook his head.

"You gotta choose… either information blackout, or you might as well just tell her everything. You know she's going to take this as a challenge now." Shaking his head again, Aubrey got back to his paperwork. "Also, you need to get ready. Your first appointment is Mrs. Mavity."

It wasn't just that he needed to prepare his station; he also needed to get ready to have his butt pinched. Mrs. Mavity was five feet of sassy grandma, and she'd had no hesitation about telling him how much she liked his butt during her first appointment with him. She had asked permission before pinching first, and he'd automatically said ‘yes' without thinking about it, and it had made her so happy that he hadn't been able to bring himself to change his answer during any of the sessions since.

Sandra had offered to tell her, but really… she was only there for ten sessions. He could stand having his butt pinched ten times. It really did make her happy, and she only had two more sessions to go.

Sighing—far more concerned about what Sandra was doing with her phone than he was about Mrs. Mavity's butt-pinching propensities—he headed over to his station. Sandra was at hers, head down, finger gliding over her screen. When she saw him out of the corner of her eye, she looked up, gave him a little finger wave, and went right back to looking at her screen.

"I'm not going to tell you anything more unless you stop looking," he called to her.

"I don't need you to," she called back without looking up.

Well, he'd tried.

Strangely, he felt a little better about telling his friends tonight. Sandra and Aubrey were excited for him. Maybe the others would be, too, even though he'd have to admit that he wasn't who they thought he was.

Well, Law might not be excited, but Mistress Julie was excited about Law not being excited, so that was good enough for him. He knew she'd be telling Olivia and Camille at brunch today, so that meant he needed to tell his friends when he saw them tonight. He'd much rather they find out from him than from club gossip.