25. April

TWENTY-FIVE

APRIL

The awful cold had made its way through my system. By Friday, I was totally back to my old self. Steff's promise of never getting sick again had sweetened the pot on letting him claim and turn me. I was drained and worn out, and in dire need of some pampering. So, I called Chelsea to see if she wanted to go out for lunch and a spa day—my treat.

She'd agreed, but had seemed distant on the phone. When I picked her up, she'd been quiet and a little withdrawn. I drove us to the next town over. Since this was supposed to be a treat, I didn't want to take her to the salon where she worked, and going to the competitor just seemed weird. Plus, there was a fantastic Vietnamese restaurant in town to which I wanted to take her.

We sat in the service chairs beside each other, and while the technicians gave us each a foot massage, I finally asked her what was wrong. "Are you okay, Chelsea? You seem a little out of it."

She shot me a guilty look and twisted her hands in her lap. "I've got a lot on my mind. Sorry."

"Don't be sorry. You can tell me, you know. That's what family is for. What's up?"

Chelsea sighed, then smiled a watery, nervous smile. "Um… I'm pregnant."

I screeched in excitement and surprise. My technician jumped back and almost fell to the floor. I looked at her apologetically. "I'm sorry, so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you." I looked back at Chelsea and saw, with a sinking feeling, that the look on her face was anything but happy. "Why do you look miserable? Shouldn't you be excited?"

She sagged in her chair, looking like someone had just told her that her dog had died. Like being pregnant was the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone. I remembered the story Kellan had told me about how Aiden's mom had left, and I worried Chelsea was thinking the same thoughts she had.

Finally, Chelsea said, "Kris doesn't want kids."

It took a second for that to register. "Wait, what?"

She sighed and readjusted herself. "Back when we were dating, we decided that we didn't want kids. The responsibility of it all was too much. I think Kris saw how much Kellan struggled with raising Aiden." Chelsea started to cry. "And he thought it was more than he could handle. I agreed. We both love kids, but having our own seemed so intimidating. We dote on Aiden like he's our own, but it's different.

"Kris always talks about how he and his brother were hell-raisers and that if karma is real, he'd be in for it if he ever had a kid. He's always been very vocal about it. I thought I was too, and then I saw that positive test, and I freaked out. April, do I even tell your brother? Or do I go get it taken care of? In secret, I mean."

The technicians working on our toes did a good job of acting like they were ignoring our conversation, but I could see they looked like they wanted to be anywhere but right there. I didn't blame them. It was an uncomfortable conversation. I felt for Chelsea. It had to be tough to go through something like this without having someone to talk to. I couldn't imagine how stressful it must have been to keep this hidden from Kris.

"I know this is hard. I can't even start to understand how hard this is, but isn't this part of marriage? Kris is there for you. He's the one person you can talk to even when it's a difficult discussion, right? This wasn't part of your plan, but fate had other plans. Maybe if you talk it out, the two of you can come to another decision." I took a breath and asked the question that was screaming to be asked, "Chelsea, do you want to the baby?"

Chelsea's face crumpled, and she nodded so hard that tears bounced off her nose. "I didn't think I ever wanted kids. Ever. But when those two lines appeared on the test, and I knew a baby was growing inside me, I… I don't know. It was like a door opened that I didn't even know was inside me. I spent an hour imagining what it would be like to hold it, to hear it cry, to have its little hand grab my finger. I can't describe it. Then the shame washed over me when I remembered all the plans and decisions Kris and I had made. I mean, we've only been married for two years. It felt like I was betraying him by even considering keeping it."

I took Chelsea's hand and squeezed it. "I'll be there for you no matter what, but I know my brother. I don't, in a million years, think he'd abandon you or the child. It may not have been what he wanted, but things change. Maybe, when he finds out, he'll have a change of heart the way you did. There's only one way to know, though. You've got to tell him."

Chelsea nodded and wiped tears from her eyes. "You're right. Ugh, you are totally right. I knew it, but I was scared. I needed someone to talk me through it."

After getting such huge news off her chest, Chelsea was a little more like her old self. We spent the rest of the appointment talking about more banal things—TV shows, music, books. It was a relief to talk about something less intense and serious. Still, even as we talked about everything but the baby, my mind kept going back to it.

It stayed on my mind all day, all the way into my date that night with Steff. He'd rented an entire corner of Bernard's Seafood Bistro, which was the closest to fine dining you could find without going all the way to Denver. It was the go-to place for high schoolers on prom night in and around Lilly Valley. He'd even had them put candles and a single rose on the table.

I was picking at the crab cake appetizer and staring off into space, when Steff reached over and took my hand. "You seem somewhere else. Is everything okay?"

I cursed myself. I was terrible at keeping stuff hidden, which made me an awful liar. "I'm sorry."

I looked up at him and was struck by how fucking delicious he looked. There was a flash in my mind of sliding his cock into my mouth. I blinked it away and tried not to blush. Apparently, I wanted to eat him instead of the food. Steff raised an eyebrow, and a low growl sounded in his chest. A grin spread across his face, like he'd read my thoughts.

"Can shifters read minds?" I asked as I failed to keep my face from flushing.

Steff shook his head. "No, but we can scent a shift in pheromones. Whatever you were just thinking aroused the hell out of you. I liked it." He wiggled his eyebrows. "You'll need to wait to tell me about it though. Most restaurants frown on sex on the tables during operating hours."

That made more images and thoughts erupt in my mind, and a warmth grew and spread between my legs. Steff's eyes blazed harder. Thankfully, he eased himself back into his seat and popped a shrimp into his mouth. "What's really on your mind? I doubt thoughts of our sweaty, naked bodies could make you zone out like that."

I chewed on my lip for a second, then finished the last bite of my crab cake. I wiped my lips with the napkin, and cleared my throat. "Do you want children?"

Steff had put his glass to his lips to take a drink of water, and he nearly choked on it. He sputtered and coughed, which made me wince.

He held up a hand and finished coughing. "It's fine, sorry. You only surprised me, is all. To answer the question, yes, I'd eventually like to have kids. For the longest time, I didn't think I ever would. After being kicked out of my pack, I was on my own. There aren't many bear shifter ladies around, and shifters can only have children with their own kind. Like, I could go on a date and be with a wolf shifter or something, but we can't have babies together.

"I thought of finding another bear pack to join. Especially when I came back home, but I'll be honest, the thought of mating with anyone but you never sat right. I don't think I could have done it. I could have forced it and pretended, but that wouldn't have been to the woman I chose. It wouldn't have been fair to myself. So, instead of finding joy in a woman, I found joy in coaching the game I love. That and hanging with my friends. What about you? Did you ever want kids?"

"Not really. Not while modeling at least. I always assumed that, eventually, I'd meet the right guy. We'd settle down and have kids." Steff growled at the mention of another—fictional—man. "Easy, big guy. I clearly never met anyone I ever wanted to start a real life with. I'm pretty glad about that. It would have made this," I gestured at both of us, "even more complicated."

"So," Steff said, "what brought about this baby talk?"

"Chelsea."

Steff's eyes widened. "No way."

"Yes, way. She's really freaked out. Apparently, back when they were just dating, she and Kris decided that they never wanted to have kids. She's pregnant and hasn't told Kris yet. She wants to keep it, and she's crazy worried about what Kris is going to say."

"Oh, shit. Sounds stressful."

"To say the least. I wanted to have this conversation now, so if there happens to be a surprise later on, we each know where the other stands."

Steff took a drink and went back to his food. "I'll give you as many babies as you want. And if we end up not wanting any, that's fine as well."

"I kind of wish we'd had this conversation a long time ago."

"Well, we were both kids back then. Even if we'd had that talk, I don't think we were mature enough to really make a decision. Plus, as you've seen, there were bigger things to discuss instead of whether or not we wanted kids."

I had to agree with that. The whole I'm-a-magical-creature talk probably did take precedence over the do-you-want-kids talk. Still, it was good that we were having this conversation. Now, matter what happened, we knew where the other stood.

When we got home, I could tell by the bulge in Steff's pants that he hadn't forgotten about our steamy little moment in the restaurant. Before I could even get my shoes off, he came up behind me and wrapped an arm around my waist. He leaned in close, his lips barely touching my ear. "Tell me exactly what you were thinking about back in the restaurant."

I took a trembling breath, already getting wet. "Um… I was thinking… about sucking your cock, if you must know."

Steff growled and his hands slid from my belly to my breast. He played with my nipples through the fabric. I sighed and pressed my ass back into him, feeling his hardness through his jeans.

"What else?" His voice was barely above a whisper.

"I thought about you inside me. Fucking me." I was trembling, already wanting him. Wishing we were already naked.

"Is that what you want? Do you want me to fuck you?"

"Yes."

"Do you care about this shirt?"

"What? No. Huh?" What the hell was he asking?

Without hesitation, he grabbed the fabric on both sides and yanked it open. Buttons flew across the room, fabric tore, and then my breasts were free. It was one of the hottest things anyone had ever done to me. "Holy shit."

We rushed to the bedroom, tearing at each other's clothes. Steff knelt between my legs, kissing my stomach as he kneaded my breasts. My breathing was erratic, almost too excited. Pushing me to the bed, he climbed onto the mattress beside me. Steff massaged my breasts and kissed me before he lowered his head and pressed his face between my legs. I gasped as his tongue slid inside of me.

His lower body was up near my face, ready to sixty-nine, and I didn't want to disappoint. I slid my hands across the muscles of his back and flank. He sucked at my clit, and my eyes rolled back in my head. It felt incredible. I grabbed his cock and slid it into my mouth, working him as he fucked me with his tongue. I caressed his ass as I slid my tongue and lips across his length. Soon, his groans of pleasure mixed with my own.

I pulled my mouth away, gasping for breath. "Fuck me, Steff."

"I thought you'd never ask."

He sat up, turned, and moved between my legs. I lifted my hips toward his, desperate to have him inside me. I watched as he grabbed his cock and slid the head back and forth across my clit. Our eyes locked as he teased me, and my body grew tense as I neared orgasm.

Without warning, he slipped into me, and it was like his entire body was sliding into my pussy. I arched off the bed, digging my nails into the hard muscles of his back. He leaned in and kissed me, deeply and passionately, his hands twining in my hair. His tongue slipped into my mouth, matching his thrusts.

His movements grew faster, hungrier, and the delicious tension between my legs built, increasing in pressure. Tingles and waves of pleasure radiated out into my arms, legs, and stomach. I was close.

Jesus, so close .

Steff buried his face in my neck, his lips and tongue stroking the flesh between my jaw and collarbone. The muscles in his back tightened as his hips moved faster. His teeth brushed against my skin. Before I could even think about the fact that he was about to bite me, the tension exploded and my head snapped back into the pillow. I jerked and twitched as wave after wave of ecstasy washed over me. He could have done anything he wanted at that moment.

He was still slamming himself into me, sending bursts and explosions through me. The orgasm seemed never-ending. I groaned and gasped for breath. Steff's back arched, and his hips spasmed into me as he came. He hissed a curse and lowered his face to my neck, and instead of biting me, I heard his teeth sink into the pillow next to me. I lay there under him, soaked in sweat, running my hands up and down his back.

"I didn't bite you. I promise," he gasped, breath heaving out of his chest.

"It's okay. It's okay. I know you didn't."

"I held off. I want you to know. I want you to ask for it. I'm not going to do it without your blessing."

"I'm getting close, babe. It won't be long. I'll be ready soon."

Steff rolled off and collapsed beside me. "You know," he said with a smile, "we may not be ready for kids yet, but it sure is fun as hell practicing."

I burst out laughing, and like a contagion, Steff laughed along with me. We laughed until we cried, until our stomachs ached. As our laughter finally subsided, we cleaned up and pulled the covers up, wrapping ourselves around each other. I rested my head on his chest, and the last thing I thought before drifting to sleep was, am I ready yet?