17. Miranda

I hold Declan's body,still trembling from the aftershocks of his orgasm, against mine. His weight is comforting, not crushing. Wow. I can't believe what we did. I had sex—made love—with Declan Makenzie. He loves me, he wants to marry me and have children and make a home. I will finally have a home I won't have to leave. Tears slip from my eyes, and one must drip onto his face tucked against my neck because his head pops up.

"Oh, Miranda, I'm sorry. Please don't cry. I'm sorry." His beautiful blue eyes are sad and breaking my heart.

"What? What's wrong?" I ask.

"You're crying. Did I hurt you? I'm sorry I didn't last longer."

Oh, this dear man. I pull his face to mine and press a kiss to his lips. He sighs and kisses me back and slowly lifts his head. His eyes are a little less sad. That's a win.

"You didn't hurt me. I'm crying because I'm happy. I never thought I'd have this with you. This is everything I've ever wanted. I love you. This was perfect."

The skeptical look on his face makes me giggle.

"It was perfect," I insist.

"You didn't come."

"We were both virgins. The first time is awkward for everyone. Anyone who says differently is either lying or a character in a romance novel."

We both start laughing and Dec rolls to my side. Uh…

"Next time we do this," I say.

"There's going to be a next time?" Dec says hopefully, nuzzling my ear and kissing a spot behind my ear I didn't know connected to my girly parts. I tilt my head to give him more access.

"Yes. Oooh, that feels good. But not tonight. Yeah, feels good." I close my eyes and enjoy the sensations. I roll to face him and remember what I was talking about.

"Next time, we should use condoms or figure out better logistics."

"Miranda, love, we're in bed, naked. Why the hell are we talking logistics?"

"Because, my dear Declan, I'm lying in a wet spot and your stuff is leaking out of me and I'm sticky and icky."

He looks confused, but the light dawns. "Oh, oh. Um, yeah."

Jumping out of bed, gloriously naked, he rushes to the bathroom, and comes back with a wet washcloth and a towel.

"Okay, here's the plan." He turns on his bedside lamp and sits on the edge of the bed.

We had done everything by the light of the moon, and to have more light is jarring. All of those muscles and taut skin were touching me moments ago. I peek at his cock. Even soft, it's impressive. Not that I have anything to compare it to, but…yeah…wow. It twitches and I startle.

"If you keep staring at him, he'll wake up," Dec says.

When my gaze darts to his face, he winks.

"Here's a cloth in case you want to wipe off or whatever. I figured we could take a shower and then sleep in your bed?"

I nod.

"How about you go start the shower and I'll join you in there?" I ask. I know we just had sex, but to do this with him here is way too intimate.

He gives me a sweet smile. He gets it. "Okay. See you in there."

Being in locker rooms all the time must have made him comfortable being naked. Of course, if I looked that good without clothes, I'd strut my stuff too. He pushes the door partially closed to give me privacy and I quickly take care of what I need to. I'm not as comfortable walking around naked as Declan is. I need to wrap up in the towel to enter the bathroom.

The shower is running, and steam is filling the room.

"Be right there," I tell Declan. "I'm gonna go in there," I say, gesturing toward the toilet room.

Handing me the soap when I join him in the shower, he says, "If you wash my back. I'll wash yours and your front. And everywhere else."

Giggling, I take the soap and motion for him to turn around. I run the bar between my hands to get a lather going. I inhale the crisp, clean scent that reminds me of my favorite field after a fresh rain. And then run my hands over his shoulders and down the glorious muscles of his back. I can't believe all of this is mine. I'm free to touch it, caress it, kiss it, and have it next to me in bed, holding me from now on. I'm afraid my alarm is about to go off and prove all of this was a dream. But, for now, I'm going to enjoy this. I want to remember it for the future.

Once I'm done with Dec's back, he takes the soap and winks.

"Your turn, my beautiful Daisy."

My heart melts at the use of my childhood nickname. The shower is equipped with rainfall shower heads. The warm water is streaming over both of us. Before he can get started soaping me up, I grab his left arm and turn it over in order to clearly see what is there on the inside of his wrist, normally hidden by his watch band. It's a small white and yellow daisy bloom.

My throat tightens, and I cough to clear it. "When did you get this?" I ask over the sound of the water raining down on us.

"After you left for New Zealand. I wanted to have you with me."

"Wanna know one of the first things I did when I got to New Zealand?"

When he nods, I hold up my right wrist, showing him the small tattoo of the blue bloom of a forget-me-not flower. The blue is the same shade as his eyes.

"I got this done to remind me of you. Your eyes are the same shade of blue and it reminds me of the field we would play in as kids. Those were the best times of my life."

"Your life thus far," he says. "There will be even better days ahead."

He pulls me to him and kisses me deeply as the water streams over us.

"Miranda, love," he says. "I want to make you feel as good as I do. Will you let me?"

My eyes widen, unsure how this is going to work. I've pleasured myself in the tub plenty of times. But, well, I know what I'm doing.

"Oh…okay," I stammer. Of course I want an orgasm, what woman doesn't? But I don't want any broken bones or concussions for either of us. No orgasm is worth that.

His low chuckle is sexy. Okay, every last, glorious inch of him is sexy. But the vibration of his chuckle against me, well, it's almost as good as Mr. Buzzy living in my nightstand drawer.

"Trust me," he murmurs as he presses a kiss behind my ear. I shiver at the sensuality of it.

"Mmm…"

Recognizing my murmur for the agreement it was, he guides me back to sit on the wide shower bench. This shower is incredible. It is huge, with more than enough room for a giant like Declan to move around easily. The rainfall shower heads are mounted high enough for him to stand under them. There are jet nozzles built into the walls if you want to direct the stream to aching muscles, and there's a handheld sprayer Dec grabs and fiddles with to get a strong pulsating stream flowing from it.

He kneels in front of me with the water streaming over him and catching on to his long, dark eyelashes, making them spiky over his mischievous blue eyes. With a wiggle of thick, dark brows, he uses a hand to nudge my legs apart, opening wide and exposing my most intimate part. I know we made love earlier, but that was in the shadows. I feel too exposed with him looking at me. I keep things trimmed and tidy down there but maybe I'm too furry? He's a shifter, though. Maybe I'm too bare?

Maybe he sees the apprehension in my eyes because the sweetest, sexiest smile appears on his kissable lips and the blue of his eyes darken with what I'm pretty sure is desire.

"I'm admiring the view. You're beautiful. Everywhere."

I remember I need to keep breathing if I'm going to live long enough to enjoy whatever he has planned. My inhale is shaky—from anticipation, not trepidation—and I try to exhale slowly. That effort is a lost cause when he runs the handheld sprayer up the inside of one leg, stopping just short of the goal, and then back down, repeating on the other leg. I'm quivering at the sensations the strong pulse has on my sensitive inner thighs. I can't wait to feel what it does to my clit.

As if reading my mind, he starts the trek up my leg again and this time hits the target. I yelp at the jolt of pleasure shooting through me at the contact of the pulsating jet. I've been shortchanging myself all these years, limiting myself to the tub and toys. Of course, my rentals never had state of the art handheld shower heads either. When I finally buy a house of my own, that will be one of my first purchases.

Again, his low chuckle causes things to tighten and flutter inside of me.

"You like that, Daisy?"

I nod, gasping for breath. He turns the head to another setting and the pulsating stream is another rhythm. If I knew Morse code maybe I'd know it was spelling out something like, I own your pussy, because it does. The pressure and pulse on my clit are making me writhe and squirm and use the Lord's name in ways our parish priest back home would frown upon, but I don't care. I'm about to shatter when suddenly the stream of water disappears. I whimper because I was so close to coming.

"Can't let the shower head do all the work, can I?" Declan asks as he scoots forward on his knees after turning off the shower head and leaving it to dangle. Speaking of dangling, his cock is hard and long and bouncing against his belly as he moves. Wow. I'm glad I didn't get a good look at him before we made love because I would have been even more nervous. I assume we are going to have sex again but Declan surprises me by dropping his head and giving my clit a long lick. He pulls my hips forward, perching me on the edge of the wide seat and wiggles his shoulders under my thighs. He licks, nibbles, and sucks my clit and upper thighs, holding me in place so he can feast on me. Judging by the mmms, grunts, and groans, feasting is definitely what he's doing. I'm helpless to do much of anything other than lean back against the tiled wall. I should probably be thinking practically about if our roommates are here and can hear me, but I can't. The rasp of his tongue is magical. His hot breath on my center causes shivers to rush through me. His wet hair I'm grabbing to help keep him right where he is licking me, is slick and soft. I have always loved the slight curl he gets in the back. After tonight I never want to sleep without Declan at my side again. Any thoughts of road trips, hockey, or even my own name fly out the window when he releases his hold on one of my hips and pushes inside with one long, thick finger. His cock was bigger, of course, but it didn't curl to hit that spot.

"Oh yeah, right there." I realize I'm chanting those words aloud, not thinking them as he pumps first one and then two fingers inside me. Curling to hit my g-spot while he continues to lick and flick my clit with his magical tongue.

I will never be able to go get an ice cream cone with this man without spontaneously orgasming watching his tongue lick it and wishing I was the sweet treat. I'd giggle at the thought but suddenly I'm coming like never before. It's like riding a giant wave and you've reached the crest and now you are coming down the other side with the water crashing around and stealing your breath.

"Oh my god, Declan. Oh, oh," I cry, trembling as the waves of ecstasy wash over me. I think I'm crying but with the water raining down on me, I'm not certain what are tears and what is the shower. I have never felt like this before. Connected to someone but also like I'm floating away. It's incredible. I can't do anything but gasp, trying to catch my breath. With a last kiss to my upper thigh and a self-satisfied smirk, Declan gently lowers my legs until my feet touch the tiled shower floor and stands. His cock is at eye level, and I reach out to return the favor, but he steps back.

"I'm okay," he says, his voice gravelly and a bit breathless too. "It's going down. Watching you come apart was the sexiest thing I've ever seen, and I popped my cork when you did." He looks down, maybe embarrassed to admit to his lack of control, but it makes me love him more. That a man as big and strong as Declan is comfortable enough, trusts me enough, to be honest and vulnerable with me lets me know I am safe with him. I can trust him with not only my body and my heart but with my dreams too. I have a home. Declan Mackenzie is my home.

Eventually, we both are fully clean and I'm grateful Carter invested in a high-capacity hot water heater. Declan gently towels me dry after our shower, and then carries me into my room and carefully places me on the bed because my legs are still wobbly after my mind-blowing orgasm. Walking into our shared closet, he grabs me a pair of panties and the Cornell t-shirt I like to sleep in and helps me put them on. He pulls on a clean pair of boxer-briefs. When we are under my covers and I'm wrapped in his arms with my head resting on his chest, I silently thank everything in my past that has brought me to this point. I have never felt safer or happier. Happy New Year to me.