Chapter 8 Kelly Kaplan

Dealbreaker

Three Weeks Until Christmas

He was sweet enough to walk me to my door, but then he tried for a kiss, as if I gave him any indication whatsoever that I was interested in kissing him after we barely even got to know a single thing about each other.

I pretended I didn’t see him move in as I turned to unlock my front door, and I bid him goodnight before he could ask to have one more drink as a way to try to get into my pants—I mean into my house .

Yeah…no. Not happening, Cockshot.

I lean against the front door after I close it, and I draw in a deep breath.

The television is blaring a commercial in the next room, but I need a second to brush off that date.

If that’s what’s out there, I’m definitely not ready to move on. Whatever message I was trying to send to Austin doesn’t matter. We definitely have some sort of situationship, and the fact that I couldn’t stop thinking about him when I was out with Max tells me I never should’ve agreed to a date in the first place.

In fact…I think it might’ve done the opposite.

Austin Graham gives me tingles, and he’s made enough passes at me for me to know he’s still interested.

But I’m scared.

I know this is my trust issue speaking out, and that’s something I have to deal with. But his track record is proven. As little as a few months ago, I found out he’d been working with a guy on defense to make life harder on Ava’s brother-in-law, Asher.

The Nashes are as good as family to me, too, after the opportunities they’ve given me. Ava and Grayson took me in and gave me a healthy compensation package at the bakery, and I’m forever in their debt. So it was one more strike against Austin. One more reason not to trust him.

I shake the thoughts out of my head as the sounds of Paw Patrol in the family room register. Is Mia still awake? I glance at the clock hanging on the wall—it’s only nine, but she should be asleep by now. Are they watching television together?

I push off the door and walk through the house, and that’s when I spot them.

A father asleep on the reclining chair of the couch, his little girl perched on his chest—also asleep. His arms are holding her close, and his lips are planted on the top of her head as Chase barks about saving Santa on the television.

My heart swells in my chest as I stare at them.

It’s possibly the most adorable scene I’ve ever witnessed in my life, and I quietly wrestle my phone out of my purse to take a picture of the two of them so I can stare at the sugary sweetness of it any time my heart desires.

I slip my phone back into my purse, and I locate the remote. I click the television off, and that’s when Austin jolts a bit and comes to.

He doesn’t dare move so as not to wake Mia, but his eyes move to mine. “Sorry,” he mouths.

I can’t help when a soft smile lifts my lips.

His eyes move down my dress. “What happened?” he whispers.

I chuckle. “Long story,” I whisper back. I nod to Mia. “May I?”

He nods, and I lift her off of him and carry her to her bedroom. I kiss the top of her head and set her in her crib, and I sing a quick version of “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.” I feel sad I missed her falling asleep even though I know she was in good hands with her dad.

I’m startled when I turn and find him leaning on the doorway watching me.

I jump a bit, and he whispers another sorry .

I sneak past him, our arms brushing on my way by. “I’m just going to go change.”

“Need any help?”

I press my lips together and eye him warily, and then I head to my bedroom.

I mean…it’s not the worst idea, is it? I could just not change and walk back out to the family room naked.

I don’t.

I slip on a pair of pink fleece reindeer pajama pants and a green Santa shirt, and I’m about as unsexy as it gets as I carry my dress in my hands to deposit it into the big garbage can in the kitchen.

He’s sitting in the same seat where he was sleeping only moments ago, and he doesn’t look like he’s going to leave anytime soon.

I don’t really want him to go.

I find myself not wanting him to go a little more each time he’s here. Usually on Tuesdays, he takes Mia for the day, and he returns her after dinner time.

This is different.

It’s something I feel like I could easily get used to, and part of me is trying to remember why that’s a bad thing.

“So, what happened to the dress?” Austin asks.

I clear my throat. “My, uh… date knocked over a glass of wine, and my dress took the brunt of it.” I shrug as I head to the garbage can and toss it in.

“How was the date?” he asks, and I hear the caution in his tone.

I walk over and plop down onto the couch beside him, and I set my feet on the table in front of me before I answer. “Safe to say there won’t be another.”

“Because he ruined your favorite dress?”

How’d he know it’s my favorite?

Because I couldn’t stop thinking about you .

I shake my head. “No chemistry.”

He reaches over and squeezes my thigh a little. “Sorry. But honestly…yeah, no. I’m not sorry.” He doesn’t remove his hand, and the spot on my leg where his hand rests burns, as if all the nerves in my body are reacting to his touch and all the blood is rushing to the spot where his hand is.

I lean my head over onto his shoulder as I huff out a chuckle. “Plus, his last name is Cockshot.”

“Deal-breaker.”

“At least if I plan to change my name, it is.”

“Are you?” he asks. “When you get married someday, I mean.”

I lift a shoulder. “Probably.”

Kelly Graham has a nice ring to it, not that I’ve thought about it. Or I did, I guess. Back when we were dating.

I straighten and glance over at him, and his eyes are burning into mine.

What changed?

It’s like suddenly he’s irresistible to me. I mean, sure, I’ve always liked him. I’ve always been interested. But I have the strangest urge to lean over and kiss him.

“Are you ready to give this another chance yet?” he asks quietly.

Heat burns between us.

I’m getting closer, but I’m too scared to admit that to him.

I give him my standard answer. “Not yet.”

“It’s getting late. I guess I should head home,” he says, finally moving his hand from my leg and leaving a cold chill in its wake. He moves to stand, and I stand, too, so I can walk him out.

We head down the front hall, and I keep thinking I should come up with something—anything—to get him to stay, but I’m coming up short.

He stops when we get to the front door, and he sets his hand on the handle. Before he pushes it down to open the door, though, he turns back around to face me. “I had some news I wanted to share with you earlier.”

My heart skips a beat at his words. Is he about to tell me he’s seeing someone?

It surprises me that’s the first thought that runs through my head, but there it is.

“What is it?” I ask, my voice hoarse as I wait with a bit of anxiety.

“I’m starting on Sunday,” he blurts.

“Oh my God, Austin! Congratulations!” I squeal, and I toss my arms around his neck. I know how much he’s wanted this. I know he’s been working for it.

He laces an arm around my waist as I hug him, and I pull back but not out of his arms.

“And before you say anything, I want you to know I worked my ass off to make it happen. I didn’t sabotage anyone, didn’t bribe anyone. Just good, old-fashioned, hard work.”

“I’m so proud of you,” I say, my voice low.

His eyes flick to my lips. “I can get you a couple of tickets if you’d like to come.”

“I’d love to.”

He drops his head a few inches, and my heart thunders as his lips move to mine.

God, after all this time, he still affects me. Deeply. Wildly.

His lips brush across mine, and it’s just the softest breeze of a kiss, but it’s still a kiss.

He pulls back, letting me out of his embrace even though it’s not really what I want, and he turns to open the door.

“Good job, Graham,” I say, and I’m not sure if I’m talking about getting the chance to start, doing it the right way, or that kiss.

He turns back toward me, and he grins. “Back at you, Kaplan.” He winks, and then he walks out the door.

I close it behind me, and I lean on it like I did not so long ago when I arrived home. Instead of doing it to compose myself after a not-so-great date, though, I do it to compose myself after that heated little exchange.