Chapter 51

The next morning, my soul was dragging on the floor when I went to Sloane's room to wake her for school. I had slept about ten minutes last night and I felt like my brain had been rolled in sand.

"Sloane, time to get up," I called out. "No rest for the wicked."

"I'm not wicked," she muttered. "Does that mean I can go back to sleep?"

"It means—" I stopped. "Well, actually, I don't know what it means. I might be too tired to figure out words right now."

"Sounds like you're beat." Sloane closed her eyes and nestled into the pillow. "Let's both go back to sleep."

I laughed and yanked the blanket off her. "Sorry, my love. It's time to make the doughnuts."

Sloane sat up and glared at me. "Why would you say that when I know for a fact you don't have doughnuts?" She smiled. "Unless you bought some this morning?"

I dragged my hands down my exhausted face. "Do I look like I've been doughnut shopping?"

My daughter sighed. "No, I guess not. What a disappointing morning. I can't go back to sleep. I don't have any doughnuts. Any other bad news?"

I froze. Yes, your father broke my heart again. I forced a smile. "Just that I haven't made coffee yet. A problem I am about to solve now."

I went to the kitchen to start brewing a cup. It would give me the jolt I needed to get Sloan off to school. Then I had to spend the day figuring out my ruined life.

Sloane swung into the kitchen on her crutches while I was sipping my coffee.

"Why aren't you dressed for work, Mom?" she asked, her brow furrowing with confusion. "Are you sick?"

"No, I'm fine," I said. "I'm tired but fine."

"Now hold on," she said. "You can't make me go to school if you're skipping work. It's a rule."

I laughed. "I've never heard of that rule."

"I'm not going to miss anything," she said. "Three of my classes are showing movies today. I think the teachers have checked out a little early this year."

"You still have to go."

"Please, I can't watch Frozen again. I don't want to build a snowman. Stop asking."

I smiled and shook my head. My amazing little girl surprised me every day with the young woman she was becoming. I decided to be honest with her.

"The reason I'm staying home is, I thought it was best if I started looking for another job," I said, my voice steady. "Now that you and Graham are close again, I don't think it's appropriate for him to be my boss."

Sloane nodded, seemingly accepting my explanation without question. "Sweet. Then I'll expect dinner promptly at five."

"Oh yeah?" I lunged at her and tickled her sides until we were both giggling.

She gave me a hug. "Get some rest. I'll see you later."

She headed off to school with a smile on her face. Without her lifting me up, my smile faded. She could never know the full extent of what had transpired between Graham and me. I didn't want her to bear the burden of knowing that her own grandfather had kept her from knowing her father. That was a harsh betrayal. The old man had gone too far.

I felt abandoned—by my father, by Graham, by everyone who had ever promised to love and protect me. And yet, as much as I wanted to blame Graham for keeping me in the dark, I knew deep down that we were both victims in this twisted game of betrayal and deception. My father had orchestrated this, manipulating two immature kids who didn't know any better.

He saw how heartbroken I was and said nothing. He let me have my daughter and go through those first years all alone. I struggled hard and he didn't care. He knew Graham would have wanted to be in Sloane's life, and he knew I needed help, and he still hid the truth.

I never dated seriously after Graham ran off. I didn't trust men. The whole miserable business had made me question my self-worth. After Sloane was born, I went through a period of depression. I worried there was something wrong with me. It turned out, the only thing wrong was having a monster for a father. I could never forgive him for doing that to me.

I wondered if my mom knew. The thought stung. Would she really do that to me? I wasn't that surprised by my father's cold-hearted schemes, but my mom? I refused to sully her memory by thinking of her as the type of woman that would intentionally inflict pain on her own daughter.

Graham hadn't asked to be targeted by my father either. His only crime was loving me—and maybe not using a condom properly. For that offense, my father had blackmailed him and sentenced him to fourteen years of secrets. Fourteen years with a daughter he could never get back.

My father had supported my decision not to tell Graham about his daughter. Now I understood why. That was what he wanted all along.

Still, I couldn't bring myself to feel sorry for Graham. He should have told me the truth, should have given me the chance to make my own decisions about my life and my future.

Everything could have been so different if I had known what my father had done all those years ago. Maybe I could have found a way to forgive Graham for his part in it all. A single phone call from him could have saved us all a decade and a half of heartache.

For now, I had to focus on taking care of Sloane and doing what was best for both of us.

Taking a deep breath, I dialed my father's number and waited for him to answer.

"Isadora," he said. "I assume you talked to Graham."

"I did. Thank you for finally leading me to the truth."

"I knew you'd want to know," he said with a smug satisfaction that left me clenching my jaw.

"Yes, the truth is always good to know. I'm not coming back to work at the company. And I quit working for Graham. Congratulations, you almost got what you wanted."

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line. "This isn't about what I want. It's what's best for you."

"You don't know what's best for me. You don't know anything about me. And you're a real son of a bitch for taking Sloane's father away from her."

He sighed. "You've made your point. We'll make you the head of a department. Just stop pouting and come back."

"You've learned nothing from all this," I said firmly. "I'm not working for you. I'm done. I'll find my own way forward. And as for you, I never want to hear from you again. Neither does Sloane. You lost the right to be my father and her grandfather when you paid my boyfriend to leave us. That's unforgivable. And not that it matters now, but seriously, twenty grand? That's all I was worth to you? You're a bad person and a cheapskate. Goodbye, Dad. I hope it was worth it."

Before he could respond, I hung up the phone, cutting off whatever poisoned response he would try to give. He was a master at manipulating people, and I wanted no part of it. This was a moment of liberation, of reclaiming control over my own life.

I sat down at my desk and started searching online job postings again. This was becoming a habit. Not even a good habit. Just like last time, there wasn't anything all that exciting. I sent out a few resumes to potential employers anyway. I was determined to find a new job, one that didn't come with the baggage of working for my father or the father of my baby.

I sent a text to Holly, telling her that we needed to have a business lunch, which was code for regular lunch but with alcohol. There was something I needed to tell her—something big. She texted back and said she could meet in an hour. If I was going out in public, I needed to shower and try to make myself look less like the walking dead.

When I got into the shower, a rush of emotions flooded over me. It took me back to the days when Sloane was little. Back then, I had cried in the shower so she would never know how sad and alone I was. I couldn't believe the extent of the lies and manipulation that had been woven into the fabric of my life for so long. My father, the one person who was supposed to protect me, had been the mastermind behind all my pain and suffering. In one fell swoop, he had changed so many lives.

I met Holly at one of our favorite cafés. She was sitting at a booth with a frosty pitcher of margaritas. I joined her and she poured us both a drink.

We clinked our glasses together. "To business lunch," we said and drank.

Her glass came to rest on the table way before mine.

She looked me up and down. "What is going on? You're not dressed. Is it casual Monday at the office?"

"No, and I'm dressed fine, thanks."

"So, what's going on?" Holly asked, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. "What's this big news you wanted to tell me?"

I took a deep breath. "I quit my job," I said, deciding to get straight to the point. "And I cut ties with my father." I raised my glass again and drained the rest of it.

Holly's eyes widened in surprise. "What happened?"

Feeling loose, I proceeded to fill her in on everything that had transpired—the confrontation with my father, the revelation about Graham's past, and my decision to sever all ties with both of them. As I spoke, Holly listened intently, her expression shifting from shock to sympathy to understanding.

"I can't believe your father would do something like that," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "To think he would control your life like that? It's disgusting."

I nodded in agreement, feeling a surge of anger and resentment bubbling up inside me. "I know," I said, my voice trembling with emotion. "But what hurts the most is that Graham kept this from me all this time. He knew what my father had done, and yet he chose to keep it a secret."

"I get why you're upset," she said calmly. "But I think you might be cutting off your nose to spite your face by taking this out on Graham. You love him, right?"

"I loved him," I said. "I thought I did."

"I'm not a love expert," she said, smiling. "But I think it's impossible to stop loving a man in an instant."

"He took money to stay away from me," I reminded her. "Chump change, at that."

Holly poured me another drink. "Graham made a mistake, yes, and he definitely should have haggled over the price, but he's not the one who ruined your life. Your father did. Graham was a broke-ass college kid. You can't really say you understand what he was going through. You've never been broke. And hey, neither have I. I mean, eww, right? But he has. Twenty thousand dollars is a day at the spa for us, but can you imagine if you never had more than a couple hundred dollars in your bank account? Can you imagine having to check the price tags on things? Talk about a nightmare." She took a long drink with a somber look on her face. "There but for the grace of God go I."

Holly could give Sloane a run for her money when it came to being dramatic, but she made a good point despite herself. Deep down, I understood that Graham's actions, while hurtful, were not the root cause of my pain. Rationally, I understood it but letting go of that anger and resentment was easier said than done.

"I'm just so angry, Holly. Angry at my father for what he did, and angry at Graham for keeping it from me. I'm angry that the two most important men in Sloane's life actively worked to hurt her."

"It's okay to be angry," she said. "But don't let it blind you."

"You sound like a fortune cookie."

"Yeah, because I'm wise." She laughed. "I'm just saying, take all the time you need to heal, but don't shut Graham out completely. He loves you. And he's hurting too. Try and imagine what he went through back then."

I knew she was right, of course. Despite everything that had happened, I couldn't deny the love I had for Graham. But forgiving him seemed impossible. How much time would it take?

"I'll try," I said, forcing a small smile. "But right now, I just need some space."

Holly nodded with understanding. "I'll be here for you, no matter what."

"Thanks." I took another sip.

"Does Sloane know about you and Graham?"

"No. Definitely not. I told him I was glad she didn't know."

"You know, secrets have a way of coming out eventually," she warned. "I think we had this conversation before."

"I know, I know."

"It might be better if Sloane hears about it from you rather than someone else."

"I just don't want to hurt her," I admitted. "There is no way I'm going to let her know her grandfather paid her father to go away."

"She's stronger than you think," Holly reassured me. "And she deserves to know the truth."

"That's just hurtful," I said. "I'm not going to hurt her."

"Fine, but what about Graham?" she asked. "Will he tell her?"

"He better not," I muttered.

"Do you think your dad will really cut you off?" she asked.

"I cut myself off," I said. "I have money. Not dad money, but I have enough. He can take his money and shove it up his cornhole."

"I still can't believe he'd do that," she said, shaking her head.

"Believe it," I replied bitterly. "I'm just another business transaction to him."

Holly was quiet for a moment. "Maybe he didn't mean for things to turn out this way," she suggested.

"Maybe not, but it doesn't change what he did. He thought if he hurt me bad enough, I would never talk to Graham again. That's why he was freaking out when he found out I was working for Graham. He knew his little secret was going to come out. When he realized he couldn't break us up, he used the secret as a weapon, not thinking it would backfire on him."

"What do you mean backfire?" Holly asked, a note of intrigue in her voice.

"Just that," I replied. "He thought he'd drive a wedge between Graham and me by exposing his dirty little secret. Instead, it's my father I'm totally done with. He's revealed himself for what he really is, a stone-cold manipulator. Graham told me he didn't like my father. I get it now."

Holly frowned. "But there must have been some reason he didn't want you with Graham."

I scoffed. "Oh, there were plenty. But none of them had anything to do with protecting me, if that's what you're implying. Graham was poor. Period. He didn't have the right last name or the right familial connections. He wasn't good enough for my dad."

"I'm sorry."

"I know. Let's get some food before I wind up on the floor. Technically, I don't have anything else to do today but I have to be sober by the time Sloane gets home."

Holly laughed. "I love business lunch."