Chapter 30

Ifinished getting dressed for the swim meet. Anticipation and anxiety coiled in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't believe I was getting the chance to see my daughter compete in her swim meet.

I had always envisioned myself as an active parent in my child's life, coaching their sports teams and cheering them on from the sidelines. This was something I wanted. It was a little weird to be jumping in on the ninth inning of her life, but I was just glad I was getting the chance to be involved.

This was going to be somewhat awkward. I felt like a coward for avoiding the office for a second day. I just couldn't bring myself to look at Isadora just yet. I opted to communicate with her through text and email instead. I didn't want our first time seeing each other after the announcement to be in a professional setting where emotions could easily run high.

Eventually, we would have to confront the elephant in the room, but for now, I wasn't ready.

I also didn't want everyone in the office to know I had a secret love child with my assistant, even if the child had been born fourteen years back. That wouldn't go over well. If nothing else, it would be a pain in the ass to explain.

I had a feeling she was going to end up quitting. If she did, it would save the terrible gossip that would spread like wildfire if it got out. Weirdly, I didn't want her to leave. I just understood it would be easier for all of us if she did.

My phone rang, interrupting my thoughts. It was Sloane. She and I had been exchanging texts. She would randomly ask me questions, like did I like tomatoes or what my favorite color was. I understood. I had the same questions for her.

"Hey, Sloane," I answered.

"Hi. Uh, I was just wondering if you were still coming to my swim meet."

"I am heading to the car now," I told her.

"I was thinking, I mean, if it's okay, do you think we could go out for dinner after the meet?"

I couldn't help but smile. "If your mom says you can, I'd like that."

"I'll tell her."

"You'll ask her," I gently corrected.

She sighed. "I'll ask her."

"I'll see you there," I told her. "I can't wait."

"See you soon."

She was struggling with her mother's actions. Sloane loved her mom and Isadora loved her daughter. But even the best people make mistakes. It didn't make her a bad mother. She deserved respect, and even if I was angry with Isadora, I wouldn't encourage or support Sloane disrespecting her.

I took the Rover to the meet in anticipation of taking Sloane to dinner afterward. We had discussed her coming to my apartment one day, but that would require Isadora's approval. I knew I had rights, but I really didn't want to get all legal on her. If we could figure out this situation without involving lawyers, that was the route I wanted to go. I didn't want to make things messier than they already were, for all our sakes.

A million thoughts raced through my mind as I sat in traffic. Would Isadora talk to me? Or would she pretend I wasn't there, avoiding any confrontation like I had been doing? I wasn't sure which scenario I preferred. Each one carried its own set of challenges and uncertainties. I didn't want to distract Sloane, either.

When I arrived at the school where the meet was being held, I parked and made my way inside, purposefully avoiding looking for Isadora. I found a spot in the bleachers, feeling a thrill of excitement. Sloane and I had talked about swimming a lot. I gave her some pointers, hoping I didn't sound like an old fart.

My eyes involuntarily sought out Isadora. I spotted her the second she walked into the pool area. I couldn't help but notice the way she scanned the crowd, her gaze lingering on me for a moment before she made her way to the middle of the bleachers. Relief filled me as she deliberately chose a seat away from mine, sparing us both the awkwardness of forced proximity.

The swimmers filed into the pool area. I watched them stretch and talk to each other. I watched with bated breath as Sloane scanned the crowd, her face breaking into a radiant smile when she spotted me. My heart swelled with pride as she waved enthusiastically. I waved back, hoping I could bring her good luck.

I couldn't help but notice Sloane didn't wave at Isadora. My daughter's eyes never once strayed in her mother's direction. I knew that had to hurt Isadora. I felt guilty. She had that usual stoic look with her chin raised and her shoulders back.

She looked at me and I quickly looked away. I focused on the swimmers lining up on the starting blocks. Sloane was there, perfect form, ready to go.

The whistle blew, signaling the start of the race. Sloane dove into the water with elegance, her strokes powerful and precise. She surged ahead of her competitors. I felt pride watching her swim, her determination evident in every movement. The cheers from the crowd filled the air, but amidst the noise, I could hear Isadora's voice shouting words of encouragement to Sloane.

As Sloane reached the final lap, her lead was undeniable. The spectators erupted into applause, their cheers mixing with the sound of water splashing as Sloane pushed herself to reach the finish line. I was on my feet, heart pounding with anticipation. She hit the sensor on the wall, officially victorious. The pride and joy on Sloane's face made my heart swell, knowing that all her hard work and dedication had paid off in that moment.

I couldn't contain my excitement as I made my way down to the pool deck to congratulate her. My heart swelled as I wrapped her in a tight embrace. Maybe it was too soon, but I was just going with what I felt. Sloane hugged me right back.

"Sorry," she said, giggling. "I didn't mean to get you all wet."

"It's fine. Great job. You killed it out there."

She smiled. "Thanks."

"I'll leave you to celebrate with your team."

"Are you leaving?" she asked, her eyes worried.

"No, I'll be waiting. Talk to your mom. If she says you can go, we'll go get a burger, okay?"

She grinned and nodded. "Cool."

Isadora was walking toward us with a boy by her side. The boy quickly walked to Sloane, leaving me with the mother of my child.

"Who's that?" I asked.

"Todd," she said, smiling.

"Is that her boyfriend?"

"I think so. It's a new thing."

I nodded, deciding I was going to have a talk with the young man very soon. She had a father in her life now and I felt a certain obligation to look out for her.

"Can we talk?" Isadora asked quietly.

It was inevitable. I nodded and we made our way outside together. I braced myself for the difficult conversation ahead, knowing that there were no easy answers.

"I understand why you've been working from home," she started. "This has complicated things. I'll find a new job. I can stay until you find a replacement."

"That's not necessary," I said.

"Graham, it's fine." She smiled. "I've made it impossible for you to work in your own office. I'll get out of the way."

I shook my head. "I just need some time this week," I admitted. "But then I'll be back, and we'll be back to normal. I just need some time."

She nodded in understanding. "Okay, but I would understand if this is too much."

"It's not."

"We're both her parents," she said. "I want you and Sloane to have a relationship. We're coparents. You should have time with her. Do you have a room or bed for her to use on sleepovers? If you don't, that's fine, but I'm sure at some point you guys will want to have that."

I stood in silence as she spoke. She was laying out the options with a quiet determination that I found both admirable and unsettling. Then I realized she had fourteen years to prepare for this conversation.

She continued to talk. "I can get you a copy of Sloane's school schedule and we can work out weekends. Thanksgiving break and Christmas break we can split. I'm not sure what you do, but we can work it out. And summer breaks as well. Since we're in the same city, I don't think it would be too hard to split her time."

"I want whatever Sloane wants," I told her, my voice choked with emotion. "I'm willing to do whatever it takes but I don't want to pressure her into anything. Too much change all at once probably isn't great."

Isadora looked at me with surprise and gratitude. "Thank you, Graham," she said softly. "I know this is difficult, but I appreciate your willingness to work together for Sloane's sake. I'll make sure Sloane knows that she has options and that we're both here to support her. She's pretty mad at me right now, but I hope that gets better soon."

I felt like I needed to get a few things off my chest but not yet. There would be time for that later. For now, I needed to reassure her I wasn't going to turn tail and run.

"I always wanted to be a father," I confessed, my voice barely above a whisper. "Despite the circumstances, please know that I am happy about this."

I had made mistakes, there was no denying that, and part of me wondered if I would ever be able to make amends for the pain I had caused.

"I'm glad you're happy."

"That doesn't mean I'm not hurt," I said. "I wouldn't have left if I had known. I've missed so much of Sloane's life, so many firsts that I will never get back."

"I'm sorry," she said, tears welling in her eyes. "It was selfish. I see that now."

"I wouldn't have left," I said again. "I can't believe you thought you couldn't tell me. Did you think I was going to ditch my own baby?"

"You ditched me without saying a word. So you know, yeah, I figured you didn't care. When you disappeared, I assumed you and I were over. I wasn't going to force you back into my life with a child. I know it was wrong, but you left, and I had to figure things out on my own."

"I wish you had told me," I said, feeling a mix of frustration and pain.

Isadora reached out and touched my arm gently. "I know, and I'm sorry for not telling you sooner. But we can't change the past. All we can do now is move forward and do what's best for Sloane."

"I want that, too," I said. "I think Sloane does as well."

"She's barely even talking to me," she said. "She has asked about you."

"What did you tell her?" I asked. "Did you tell her I didn't want her?"

"No. I mostly just avoided the topic. I tried to ignore it as much as I could."

"She needs to see us talking," I said. "A united front and all of that."

Before I could say anything more, a kid burst outside. "Ms. Haskins, come quick. It's Sloane. She's hurt!"

My heart plummeted at the sound of those words. Without hesitation, we rushed back inside.