19. Callan

19

Callan

T ouching Sage was a bad idea.

My arms ached to reach out to her, my hand itching to feel her soft skin against my palms again. I shouldn’t want her like this. I hadn’t wanted anyone like this in…well, since my ex packed up and left.

So four years.

But even when I was with her, she didn’t stop my heart like Sage did. She didn’t steal the breath from my lungs, make my cheeks heat, just from being in the same room as her. Sage’s presence could never fly under the radar. Her whole being demanded to be seen like the north star in an ink black sky.

You could look away, but you’d still feel her around you.

Sage McKinley was a fucking heart-stopper .

I didn’t know the story behind Avery’s father other than I knew he wasn’t in the picture. For Sage to raise Avery all on her own while maintaining a full-time job absolutely blew my mind. She was so strong, and I had the feeling she didn’t think of herself that way, but she should.

The tall grass brushed together as we walked through it, the field moving like ocean waves as a slight breeze ruffled the blades. Avery was skipping ahead of us as Sage and I followed, heading in the direction of the pond. Sage’s pace was slow to cater to her still-healing knee, so I matched it, not wanting her to rush. She’d said the bruise was almost gone, but I should have driven them out here instead of walking. The pond wasn’t too far out on my parents’ property, maybe a fifteen minute walk, and the day was perfectly warm with the wind. Her knee still had to be somewhat sore, but she wasn’t complaining, so I took that as a good sign that it was healing well.

“Are you going to tell me what all this is for?” Sage asked, glancing at the basket swinging from my hand, along with the fishing pole slung over my shoulder.

“Nope.” She’d have to wait a few more minutes until we got there.

“If you think I know how to fish, you’re out of your mind,” she said.

Taking my eyes off of Avery in front of us, I faced Sage as we continued walking. “I’ll teach you.”

Sage snorted and I couldn’t help the smile on my face at the sound.

She opened her mouth to reply, but stopped short when she saw my grin. “What’s that look?”

“You snorted.”

Her nose scrunched. “So?”

I turned my focus back to Avery to be sure she didn’t get too far ahead. “It was cute.”

From my peripheral, I saw Sage’s mouth pop open, then snap shut again.

“Cat got your tongue?” I teased.

“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m currently cat-less.”

A soft chuckle escaped me. “Touché.”

Minutes later, we emerged from a row of trees, coming out right on the shore of the pond. Beside me, Sage stopped in her tracks, but ahead of me, Avery was already close to the water, picking up stones.

The two of them were already pulling me in separate directions.

I set the picnic basket down, pulling out a blanket and laying it on the grass. Setting the fishing pole beside the blanket, I reached back into the basket, grabbing what had me most nervous about this date.

Before I could stand up, Sage spoke up from behind me, where she was still frozen in place. “Is that…”

“Sage,” I finished for her.

“You brought me a bouquet of sage? ”

My cheeks instantly lit up like a fire was burning in my skin, and I wanted to shrink into myself. Did she hate them? I knew this was too much.

“Callan.”

I looked up at her, the sun shining behind her, casting her silhouette in a bright glow. Her eyes searched mine for a moment before she took the two steps to the blanket and lowered herself to my level, taking the bouquet from me. I’d picked them myself, the bundle smaller than one from a floral shop, tied with an ivory ribbon at the stems.

“I love them. Thank you.”

The vibrant purple of the flowers looked pale in comparison to the light that Sage held in just her physical appearance alone.

“You’re welcome.” I turned back to the wicker basket to hide my face, knowing my cheeks were as red as cherries, but also to dig out the snacks I’d brought along.

I set the water bottles on the blanket, then laid out the wrapped sandwiches, chips, and fruit. I’d brought Avery her own Tupperware of string cheese, applesauce pouches, gummy bears, and graham crackers. I wasn’t really sure what she liked or if she was picky, so I’d packed what I’d seen other parents bring their children as a snack after lessons in the past.

“This is for Avery,” I said, setting the container down on the blanket.

Sage stared at it like it was going to sprout teeth and bite her.

“What’s wrong?”

“You packed Avery a lunch? ”

I nodded hesitantly. “Yes… Is that okay? Is she allergic to anything?” I should’ve asked before I packed it.

Her gaze snapped to mine. “No.” She shook her head. “I mean, no, she’s not allergic to anything. Thank you for thinking of her.”

I studied her for a second, wondering why this was a shock to her. “Well, I did include her.”

“I know. It’s just…I thought you had her come along because there was no one else to watch her.”

My brows pulled together. “No. I wanted her to come.” Besides, if that was the case, I was sure my mom would have been more than eager to hang out with her for an hour or two.

Sage shook her head in disbelief.

“Is there something wrong with that?” If there was, I wanted to know.

“Not many guys would invite someone’s child along on a date willingly… Let alone pack them their own separate lunch.”

“If it’s overstepping—”

“It’s not,” she interrupted. “I’m sorry. I really appreciate all of this. I’m just not used to…dates.”

I nodded in understanding as she adjusted herself on the blanket, setting the bouquet beside her.

“Do people swim here?” Avery asked from the shore, staring down at the small ripples in the water.

“Sometimes,” I told her. “It depends on the season. In the winter, it ices over, but in the summer, it’s the perfect temperature.”

Avery looked over at us. “Does that mean we can swim?”

“Maybe another day, Aves,” Sage answered. “You don’t have your swimsuit.”

“We’ll make time soon,” I added once I saw the deflated look on her face.

From my side, Sage turned to me. If shock and confusion were a picture, that would be it. I wasn’t sure why she was so surprised I was willing to include Avery. Sage was a mother, and I had no problem accommodating that. Plus, from what I’d seen, Avery was far from a handful compared to the other kids that have come through this ranch for lessons.

Sage reached for Avery’s Tupperware as she said, “Why don’t you come over here and have something to eat? You can get all messy in the dirt after.”

Avery strode through the grass, which was shorter around the pond, and sat next to her mom on the plaid blanket.

“I wasn’t sure what to pack, but there’s those applesauce pouches with the fancy tops,” I started.

“Those are my favorite!” Avery squealed, reaching her hand into the container once Sage had the lid off.

Sage let out a small laugh. “Have at it.”

Avery took the container from her, digging through the contents. You would have thought I’d gotten her a pony or something by the look on her face.

“I brought her a sandwich, too, just in case,” I told Sage.

“Thank you. She might not eat it, given her current infatuation with the other things you brought her, but she appreciates it. We appreciate it.”

I nodded, unwrapping my sandwich. Sage picked one up, doing the same.

We sat in silence, listening to the birds chirp in the pine trees as we ate. Even Avery was quiet, looking out at the pond. An occasional dragonfly would swoop down for water, then flutter away.

Nature calmed a wild mind, its presence drawing even the most stressed person to a point of relaxation. You couldn’t help but feel content out here, which was why I frequently visited. Sometimes, when life was too much, sitting outside with only the sounds of the countryside was the one thing I needed.

My fears, my nerves, they all disappeared when I was out here. Whether it was on horseback or foot, this was the only medicine I needed. And here I sat, sharing it with the two girls who came into my life unexpectedly.

While it was different, sharing this peace with them, I wouldn’t change a thing.

That should scare me, make me run to the hills and not look back, but it didn’t. Ever since my ex instilled such a huge self-doubt in me, I hadn’t wanted to share any parts of my life with someone else. But yet, here I sat on a date that I’d put together with the two of them.

I just hoped I was making the right decision.

** *

“This is too hard,” Avery complained from my left.

“Maybe you just need a smaller pole,” I told her. I should have brought a kids’ pole, but I hadn’t been thinking.

I was already fucking this up.

“I don’t have one of those,” she said while reeling in the line. The hook had already caught on a rock, a tree limb, and now grass under the water.

I watched the line come in, sending ripples through the pond. “I’ll get you one.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Sage said from the rock she was sitting on a few feet behind us.

I cast a glance over my shoulder at her. “Fishing takes practice, and—” I turned back to Avery just as the hook reached the tip of her pole. “—you need practice.”

“What if I’m just never going to be good at fishing?” Avery asked, a slight quiver to her voice.

I knelt beside her so we were eye level, setting a gentle hand on her elbow so she’d face me. “You don’t have to be good at everything, but don’t expect it right away.” I looked at a tree behind her, trying to think up an example, then brought my eyes back to hers. “Remember your first day of lessons? When we went over the small details, like leg pressure and how to hold the reins?”

Avery nodded .

“Well, think of fishing like that. Right now, you’re just getting used to the pole, the same way you got used to the horse. Once you’re comfortable with the pole, then you focus on the small details. Like aiming where you want your hook to land or how long you want your bait in the water.” I dropped my hand from her elbow, then wrapped it around hers on the pole, giving a reassuring squeeze. “You don’t have to be a pro at everything the second you start, right?”

She shook her head. “But I want to be good at it.”

I dropped my hand to my knee. “You will. I’ll help you.” Rising, I kept my eyes down on her. “But that starts with a fishing pole meant for your size. Next time we come out here, I’ll make sure you have one.”

“Next time?” Avery and Sage questioned in unison.

I gave a stern nod. “Next time. Now why doesn’t your mom give it a shot?” I turned to Sage.

Her eyes widened. “No way.”

“I promised I’d teach you.”

Sage crossed her arms. “I think Avery wants to keep trying.”

Avery held the pole in her mom’s direction. “You can have a turn.”

Sage gave a tight-lip smile, clearly wishing Avery hadn’t said that. “Are you sure?”

Avery nodded. “Super sure.”

Sage stood, coming forward to reluctantly grab it from her. “Alright. ”

Avery ambled over to the blanket where she had a pile of rocks she was collecting and sat, sifting through them.

Sage held the pole toward my chest. “Teach me, ol’ wise one.”

I cocked a brow. “Wise one, huh?”

She shrugged, pink tinging the apples of her cheeks as a small smile played on her lips. “You seem to be very knowledgeable in a lot of areas.”

I wrapped my hand around hers on the pole, pulling her toward me and then spinning her so her back was to my front. My other hand grabbed the one she didn’t have on the pole and led it to the reel so she could get a feel for it before casting out. But instead of telling her what each part did and how to use it, I did the most ludicrous thing I possibly could have done.

I held my chin just above the shell of her ear, the both of us looking out at the water. “I can teach you a lot of things, Sage,” I murmured.

Her chest rose and fell as her breathing deepened. “Can you?” she asked breathlessly.

Her hair brushed the stubble on my cheek. “Like you said, I’m knowledgeable in a lot of areas.”

What the fuck was I doing?

Playing a dangerous game of how far can I go was not how I had planned this to turn out. But here I was, standing behind Sage, hoping like hell that my boner wasn’t touching her ass, all because there were a lot of other things that popped into my mind the moment she said that.

I should definitely not be thinking of her this way. Especially on our first date.

Blinking the thoughts away, I adjusted her hand on the pole. “You hold the bail as you cast, then release it when it’s out. It’ll stop your line when you’re ready. Then wind here—” I moved her hand to the handle on the reel. “—to bring the line back in.”

She studied the reel for a moment. “This seems too easy.”

I took a step back, gesturing to her. “Have at it, then.”

She tested her hands, trying a few different positions to get comfortable with the feel of it, then slung it over her shoulder carefully, eyeing the hook. “It won’t bounce back and stab me, will it?”

The question was cuter than it should’ve been. “No, Sage, it shouldn’t.”

She nodded, looking back out at the water. I could tell she was hesitant to cast, so I came back behind her, wrapping my arms around her to fold my hands over hers on the pole. “Like this.” I slowly swung it behind us, setting a finger on the bail, then cast it out, her arms easily moving with mine. When the hook hit the water, I released the bail, letting the end of the line sink a bit. I tugged on it gently, mimicking the movements of a fish with the bait, and slowly reeled it in with my hand still placed over hers.

She let me have complete control, watching each movement like if she didn’t memorize it, she’d fail the test. She didn’t have to know how to fish or ride a horse for me to be entranced by her. Opposites attract, right? And though Sage wasn’t my opposite in every way, she didn’t have to know everything I did for us to have fun or get along.

I got the feeling she’d been through a lot more than I had in life, and that was fine. I’d take Sage for who she was, and if she wanted to learn things, I’d show her. But I wouldn’t mold her into someone she wasn’t.

I stepped back, letting Sage try her hand at it on her own. Taking a seat at the rock she was sitting on previously, I watched her get a feel for the weight of the pole and how to get the hook to land where she wanted it to.

I glanced over at Avery, who was making some kind of tower out of her rocks, but it kept falling over when it got too high. Scanning the ground, I found a few flat rocks and made my way over to her, taking a seat next to her on the blanket.

“Maybe these will be easier to stack,” I told her, placing the rocks next to her pile.

She picked one up, studying it like the shape of the rock was the difference between life and death. “This might work.”

She began her stack again as Sage’s phone buzzed on the blanket next to the basket. I shouldn’t have done it, but I glanced at the screen. Whoever had texted her, the number wasn’t in her contacts.

“Do you think we can come back here after my next lesson?” Avery asked, keeping her focus on the rocks as she balanced another on top.

“You’ll have to ask your mom. But if she’s okay with it, I’d love to.” Maybe I could teach Avery how to skip rocks next .

Stop it.

Avery was a student, and Sage was her mother. Thinking of future plans with them was not what I needed to be doing. It was one date, and chances were, Sage wouldn’t want to continue whatever this was.

This could very well be nothing, though.

One date didn’t mean jack shit, yet here I sat, my unforgiving brain growing attached to something that didn’t even exist.

Lost deep in my thoughts, I didn’t hear when Sage walked up to us in the grass.

“We should probably head back,” she said.

My eyes shot up to hers, then I quickly pushed to a stand. “Right. I’ll pack all this up.” The way Sage said it made me sure she wouldn’t want a second date. What the fuck was I thinking? I was stupid for even asking. Stupid for letting my brothers talk me into this. All that talk about Lettie and Bailey’s wedding had messed with my head, and now here I was, envisioning a future with someone I’d just met weeks ago.

I got to work putting everything back in the basket as Avery put her rocks back on the shore.

“Thank you for today,” Sage said quietly.

My hands slowed as I was rolling up the blanket. “Of course. I hope I wasn’t overstepping in any way.”

Her brows pulled together. “What? No. This was so thoughtful, Callan. Avery and I had a lot of fun.”

I nodded.

Fun .

That’s all this was.

But why was it so hard to get that through my fucking head?