17. Sage

17

Sage

“ A re you sure you’re okay with hanging out at Mrs. Bronson’s house while I’m at work?” I asked Avery for what had to be the fifth time.

“Yes, Mama. I like hanging out with her,” she said, like the two of them were best friends.

I pulled to a stop in front of the white farmhouse, turning the key in the ignition. I grabbed Avery’s backpack off the passenger seat and got out, handing it to her where she stood.

I’d taken Callan up on his offer for his mother to watch Avery, but today was the first day, and possibly the last. I didn’t want to inconvenience Charlotte in any way—she had to be busy with the rescue. I considered today a test run, though I was well aware she’d insist it was fine. She’d been more than eager when I called her a few days ago to set this up .

“I packed you snacks and your art supplies. There’s also a few ponies in there you can play with,” I told her.

She stepped forward for a quick hug, her voice muffled in my shirt when she said, “Thanks, Mama.” She let me go, then smiled and waved at something—or someone— behind me. “Hi!”

“Hey, Avery.” That voice. God, I hated how it made me buzz with awareness. Hated how just two words from him could make me want to fix my hair and double check that I didn’t have any crusted bits stuck to my eyelashes.

Avery turned, bounding up the steps to the porch as I swiveled, finding Callan walking in my direction.

He came to a stop a few feet away from me, but I wished he’d step closer. It felt like forever since he was at our house, and while yesterday was my day off and I tried to be as present with Avery on those days as possible, it was extremely difficult when I kept remembering him standing in my kitchen, or playing in Avery’s room, or cleaning the counter. This man had been to my house one time and I was daydreaming of him coming back.

What was wrong with me?

“Are you heading to work?” Callan asked. He was wearing a navy blue striped button up tucked into blue jeans. His boots looked so worn, I swore there had to be holes in the bottom.

“For a few hours. Charlotte’s watching Avery until I’m off. I figured you’d be working, given the time.” I wasn’t sure how he expected to help watch Avery when he worked similar hours to myself, but since he was technically self-employed, I didn’t really know what to expect out of his set schedule. That, and I also felt bad asking him.

“Yeah, no, I am. I’m in between lessons right now,” he replied, reaching up to rub at the back of his neck, which was shaded by his cowboy hat.

“Do you typically work all day?”

“Sometimes. There’s a couple days a week that I have a chunk of free time during the afternoon, and I give myself two days off. I’d work all seven, but my mom insists her kids take a break.” He dropped his hand back to his side.

“It must be nice being able to make your own schedule.”

“It is.” His cheeks flushed as he shifted on his feet and reached up to take his cowboy hat off, running his opposite hand through his hair. “I had a question. And before I ask, let me preface by saying you can say no if you don’t want to. I just, uh…” He glanced at the ground, kicking at a rock with his boot, then pinned those hazel eyes back on me. “I’ll just outright ask. Sage, would you maybe want to go on a date with me?”

My eyes widened as I was unable to hold back my reaction. Did he just… He just asked me on a date.

Callan Bronson just asked me on a date .

“Me?” He couldn’t have meant that.

His lips pursed together, concealing a smile as his cheeks turned a deeper shade of crimson. “There’s not anyone else around, Sage.”

“Right.” A date didn’t mean we were going to get any further than just one date. It was one date. There wasn’t any harm in that. Yet here I was, overthinking it, and he’d just asked me not even a minute ago. “Are you sure?”

He let out a small chuckle, nodding. “I’m sure.”

“It’s just, I’m a mom and I have Avery—”

His brows furrowed. “What does that have to do with me asking you out on a date?”

My lips parted in slight awe that he didn’t care that I was a mother before I replied, “I have a kid.”

“I’m failing to see your point here,” he said carefully.

“Why would you want to date a mom?” I blurted.

We weren’t even on said date yet and I was already blowing it.

He shook his head. Any nerves there before were now gone from his gaze. “You’re not just a mom, Sage. You’re a beautiful woman who, despite whatever odds were thrown at you, made it through and are doing your best to take care of yourself and another human. That takes guts, and I admire that about you. I want to get to know you , outside of being a mom and a barista or whatever you call your position at the cafe. You . I would like to go on a date with you.”

I stared at him as he stared right back, my mind reeling as my heart hung on to every word he spoke. I didn’t know how long passed, but my mouth finally decided to work, despite every other part of me still trying to comprehend his words. “Yes.”

“Oh, thank God.” He let out a relieved breath, his rigid shoulders slumping slightly with the release. He gripped the top of his hat before setting it back on his head. “You had me scared there for a minute.”

“Scared?” I asked, the corners of my mouth twitching.

Behind him, a car pulled up the driveway, slowing to a stop near the white barn. Callan glanced at it before turning back to me.

“Takes a lot of guts to ask a pretty woman like you on a date.” He slowly started walking backwards. “I’ve gotta run, but I’ll text you,” he said. His cheeks were still red, and whether he knew it or not, he didn’t seem to mind. The man wore his nerves on his cheeks, that much was for sure. Never in my life did I think I’d ever see a man blush, especially about me, but there Callan Bronson was, walking away from me after asking me on a date with his cheeks as red as roses.

I got the feeling mine were the same shade.

He was like a boy on Christmas, and my “yes” was on the top of his wishlist.

“You think I’m pretty?” I called before he turned around.

His teeth flashed with a smile. “I called you beautiful, didn’t I?”

I guess he did.

I couldn’t get this damn smile off my face, but neither could he.

He shot me a wink and turned, and I stood there watching him walk away before he disappeared. After a minute of attempting to process what just happened, I got in my car, heading toward town.

Callan Bronson just asked me on a date and I said yes .

Any moment now, I’d wake up and this would all be a dream.

After I had Avery and her father was arrested, dating never even crossed my mind because I didn’t think any man would want me after having a baby.

Sure, Callan liked me now, but when it came down to it, I didn’t feel beautiful enough to be loved the way other women were. I had a C-section scar, stretch marks—nothing about my body was the same from before I had her. And while I loved my body for growing and birthing my baby, it didn’t stop my thoughts from spiraling.

From the fear of rejection from kicking in.

From my insecurities shining through, despite being told I was attractive or beautiful.

Because in the end, when I rarely looked in the mirror and saw my body for what it was now, all I had were my thoughts. And those thoughts weren’t always on my side.

***

I’d been at Bell Buckle Brews for thirty minutes and was already told by Gemma twice that I needed to dial back on the “ cheeriness .”

Was it a crime for a girl to be happy?

I wasn’t sure about Gemma’s love life, but I thought she needed to be asked on a date. Maybe then she’d lighten up a bit .

Avery was in good hands, I was going on a date with Callan in the near future, and for once, my mind wasn’t spiraling with my mental to-do list of grocery shopping, cleaning the house, or thinking about Pudding.

The cat still hadn’t shown up, so I’d bought Avery a few more cans of wet food for her to replenish the bowl every night. She sat on the porch last night and read her book out loud in the hopes that Pudding would hear her voice and come home. It hadn’t worked, but I wasn’t giving up hope. Pudding was out there. We’d find her.

My grandmother always told me to keep the faith, so that’s what I’d do.

“I’m heading out,” Gemma said, her purse already slung over her shoulder.

I looked up from the cookie I was decorating. I’d been practicing a bit at work for Avery’s birthday coming up soon. She wanted My Little Pony sugar cookies for her party, so I was doing my best to perfect them well before the event.

“Don’t you have another thirty minutes?” I asked, setting the piping bag down.

She shrugged, chewing that ridiculous bubble gum she always smacked on. “I want to go home.”

“Can I ask you something?”

She not-so-discreetly rolled her eyes. “What?”

“Did I ever do anything to you to make you hate me?”

Her chewing paused for the briefest moment, the only indication that what I said took her off guard. “No. ”

I pressed my lips together, doing my best to ignore the obnoxious noises that resumed coming from her mouth. “Is there a reason you don’t like me, then?”

She shrugged. “No.” Her tone suggested she was bored, wanting nothing more than to leave right this minute.

Talking to her was like pulling teeth.

“Alright.” I picked the piping bag back up, turning back to my cookie.

“Finally,” Gemma muttered under her breath, walking around the counter and out the door.

A pent-up breath escaped my lips as my phone buzzed on the counter. I glanced at it, keeping my hand hovering over the cookie.

Callan: Forget I said I’d text you about the date

My heart sank. I knew it was too good to be true.

I went back to practicing with the pink icing when my phone buzzed again.

Callan: Sorry Ace hit my elbow and I accidentally hit send too early. I meant to add - it’ll be a surprise. Avery can come

I set the bag down next to the cookie, grabbing my phone to reply.

Me: Ace ?

Three dots appeared as he typed his response, my eyes glued to them the entire time.

Callan: My horse. You’ll love him

The corners of my lips inched up.

Why did meeting his horse feel like meeting someone’s parents, or their child?

Like it was some kind of next step?

Stop it. I haven’t even gone on one date with the guy and here I am trying to play house with him.

It wasn’t only my feelings I had to think of, it was Avery’s, too. Callan seemed like a nice guy, but I couldn’t be too sure. I had to take this slow, for both our sakes.

I bit down on my bottom lip, sending my response.

Me: I think I will.

But my brain feared it wouldn’t only be the horse that I’d love.