Chapter 41

Chapter 41

T he arrow thrummed through the air, the weapon still vibrating in Sebastian’s hands.

Thwonk .

“That was terrible.”

Sebastian frowned. “Thank you, Matheo. Encouraging as always.”

Matheo shrugged. “You missed the target by six inches.” He raised his weapon, drawing the string as he took aim. His shoulders lifted on an inhale, and as they dropped, he loosed his arrow.

It struck the center of their target … six inches below Sebastian’s arrow, buried in the same tree trunk.

“You’re distracted, Seb.” Matheo slung his bow over his back as he strode for the tree. He ripped the arrows from the soft wood before facing Sebastian with an expectant grin.

Sometimes, Sebastian really couldn’t stand having his actual blood brother bound to be his brother-in-arms for life.

“There are a lot of distractions right now.” Sebastian ignored Matheo’s raised brow and notched a new arrow. “Things are very … distracting.” He gritted his teeth. His arms burned as he drew back the string, an exhale whistling between his teeth as he released the arrow.

It missed the tree entirely, soaring past the wide oak and disappearing into the brush.

Sebastian groaned. “ Fuck. ”

“I’ve never seen you this bad, brother.” Matheo clasped a hand on his shoulder. “And what distractions? The pirates are gone, the allume seems to be fixed, and most importantly, Mariah is back . Things should be easier for you now, not harder.”

Matheo was right, in a way. The issues that had plagued them just a few weeks ago were gone.

But that didn’t mean Sebastian no longer had anything to worry about.

Sebastian also wasn’t in the mood to discuss any of it with his brother.

“Just take your shot so I can go find my arrow.”

It was a game they’d played since they were boys, running wild around their parents’ manor house in Sacale. They each had a single arrow, and whoever shot poorly enough to lose their arrow first had to do the other’s laundry for a week.

It was how they’d each become so skilled with a bow. It didn’t take long for most matches to end in stalemates, their games called off only when their mother summoned them for dinner.

The game was much the same now, except it was their duties summoning them away instead of their kindhearted mother.

“ If you can find your arrow.” Matheo smirked as he notched his bow. “My laundry desperately needs attention. It’s getting warmer out, and my socks are getting particularly ripe.” His bow snapped, and the arrow, again, struck the center of the target.

Sebastian groaned. “You’re disgusting.”

“I learned from the best.” Matheo propped his bow against his hip. Sebastian set his own weapon down, unhooking his leather bracers.

He had to find that fucking arrow.

“I’ll make you a deal.”

Sebastian glanced up at Matheo. “A deal?”

“Yeah,” his brother said. “I’ll let you off the hook from laundry duty … if you tell me what’s really going on. Particularly with a certain blonde-haired lady.”

Sebastian stilled. He’d ventured into the city with Ciana yesterday, joining her for that beer he’d promised her. But was that really the reason he was so distracted?

“There’s nothing going on,” he answered gruffly, dropping a bracer on the ground. “She’s just a friend and wanted to grab a beer. That’s all.”

“Right.” Matheo drew out the word, mischief twinkling in his hazel eyes. “That’s why you’re blushing. Because you got beer with your friend .”

“I am not blushing , you asshole.” The heat burning down his neck called him on his lies.

Matheo’s grin widened.

Sebastian sighed, slumping against a nearby tree. “Alright. Fine. Whatever. It was nice to get out of the palace for a bit and do something other than be an Armature.” He slipped off his other bracer, and it landed on the grass next to the first with a dull thud. “She makes me feel … I don’t know, normal. Like I don’t have to be perfect all the time and can just be me. ”

His brother made a low noise before turning and striding to their target tree. He pulled his arrow free, tossing it between his hands as he walked back.

“You don’t, you know.” Matheo leaned against the tree beside Sebastian. “Have to be perfect, I mean. No one expects that—you should know that by now.”

“ I expect it of me,” Sebastian murmured. He glanced up as the wind brushed through the trees, rustling the branches overhead.

That strive to be perfect … It had always been his struggle. It came so naturally to him as a boy and as a young man, especially when all he had to do was follow orders and obey.

But now that he was the one giving them? His stomach twisted into knots.

He’d failed his biggest test as an Armature. And even though Mariah was back, he still wasn’t sure he could forgive himself.

“I’m happy for you, brother.” Sebastian dropped his gaze to Matheo. “I’m happy you have someone you feel normal with.” Matheo’s lips twitched. “Are you interested in her being maybe more than just your friend?”

Sebastian’s heart plummeted from his chest to rest beside his bracers in the grass.

Of course, he’d thought about it. From the moment she’d stepped foot through the palace gates, Ciana had been a ray of sunshine—warm and vibrant and full of life. It was impossible not to feel drawn to her, even when she stood beside the planetary force that was their queen.

But …

“She wouldn’t want that. Not from me. Nor am I interested in her in that way, either.” He tacked on his last sentence hastily.

He loved his brother, but Matheo was the biggest gossip of them all. And the last thing Sebastian would ever want was word of this conversation to reach Ciana.

Because beneath all that sunshine dwelled monsters darker than the shadows of Enfara. He couldn’t put that sort of pressure on her, not like that. Her words from the bar flashed back through his mind. How the way he’d controlled her had reminded her of her nightmares. He refused to ever again be compared to those evil men from her past.

Despite his words, Matheo still grinned at him conspiratorially. “Alright then, brother. Whatever you say.” He slid his arrow into his quiver. “Is there anything else? Didn’t I hear you had an odd confrontation with a crazy man down in the city on the night the allume went out?”

Sebastian really needed his brother to stop asking questions he didn’t want to answer.

“Oh … yeah.” He shrugged, doing his best to feign nonchalance. “Like you said—he was crazy. Yelling nonsense about the sun. It was gibberish.”

Thankfully, Matheo didn’t push it. He merely answered with a shrug of his own. “Bizarre. Wish I had been there.” Picking up his arrow and quiver, he nodded to Sebastian. “Alright—that was enough. I’ll let you off laundry duty this time. But get your shit together, brother! We can’t have a Riqueti man wandering through Onita unable to hit a simple target on a tree. What an embarrassment.”

As they laughed together, walking back through the game park to the palace, Sebastian couldn’t stop thinking.

Not only about Ciana but the words that man had said to him.

“The moons are setting, and the sun will rise.”

He’d told himself he would share it with Mariah, but he hadn’t. He hadn’t shared the truth with anyone.

And he still wasn’t quite sure why.

“Alright, brother. It’s your turn.”

Matheo turned to Sebastian, brows lifted. “My turn? For what ?”

Sebastian grinned, stepping over a branch on the forest path as he adjusted his bow across his back. “I shared a bit about Ciana. Now it’s your turn. Is there anyone who happens to be on your mind?”

“You shared ? You hardly gave me anything!” Matheo scowled, even as blood slowly filled his cheeks.

Sebastian’s smile widened.

“Oh, c’mon, Matheo.” He bumped his brother with his shoulder, earning him another glare. “There has to be someone.”

Matheo shrugged. “Honestly … no, not really. But I’m okay with that. I like my life of training and fighting and guarding. I don’t really want any complications.”

Complications . Sebastian’s smile faltered. He’d never once viewed Ciana—or Mariah, for that matter—as a complication, but in a way, he supposed it was true.

Before their court, life had been simpler. More monotonous and repetitive, but predictable. But for Matheo to prefer that life?

“I always thought you craved a bit of adventure. You were always the one inventing wild stories of heroics while I refused to leave the libraries.”

Matheo smiled sadly. “Did you ever pay attention to the roles I gave myself in those campaigns?”

Sebastian hesitated, sifting through his memories. But for some reason, he came up short.

Matheo shifted his bow. “I was always the warrior. The guardian. The knight. While you read about great adventures and imagined yourself as the prince or the king or the captain, I was busy playing in the yard as the protector who served without hesitation.” His fingers clenched around the rowan of his bow. “I was the second son. Never cared about leading or about adventure. I just wanted to belong.”

The blood rushed from Sebastian’s face, and his heart thrummed beneath his ribs.

“Matheo.” Sebastian halted on the path, staring at his brother’s back. His eyes burned along with his chest.

He never imagined that he’d read his little brother so wrong . For their entire life, Sebastian had misinterpreted everything about Matheo Riqueti.

Slowly, Matheo turned, meeting his brother’s gaze with a guarded look.

Something cracked further in Sebastian’s chest.

“You will always belong, Matheo. You have a place here. Even the gods themselves have made it known.”

Matheo smiled. “I know. And I will forever be grateful to the gods for giving me the purpose I desperately wanted. But … it’s always why I’m just not interested in anything else. I have everything I’ve ever wanted. Why would I risk that?”

Sebastian met his brother’s stare for a long moment. Slowly, he nodded and took the three strides to stand before Matheo. He grasped Matheo’s shoulder, squeezing just slightly.

“I understand,” Sebastian murmured. “And I’m sorry for pushing.”

Matheo shrugged. “Eh, it was only fair. I did push you first.” He grinned. “I can’t wait to tell Trefor and Quentin how right we all were about your crush.”

“By the gods, Matheo.” Sebastian tossed up his hands, exasperated, before continuing down the path. “I thought you took this job seriously?”

“Of course I take it seriously. That doesn’t mean I can’t also have a little fun.”

Sebastian grumbled to himself, just as the palace stables appeared out of the tree line in front of them. “Annoying little shit.”

Matheo chuckled as they passed out of the game park and into the back aisles of the palace stables.

This part of the stables was rarely occupied, only used when the palace was hosting guests and every available stall was needed. Today, it was as quiet and empty as they expected it to be. Only their boot steps on the swept packed earth joined them.

Until something rustled up ahead and hit the wall with a rumbling boom.

Sebastian halted, senses roaring to life. His hand landed on the hilt of his dagger, just as Matheo unslung his bow in a single smooth movement.

The brothers shared a glance. Matheo nodded.

“Who’s there?” Sebastian called, voice low but reverberating off the hall.

The rustling paused just before another thump struck the walls, followed by a low groan.

“ Keep quiet! ”

Another groan. “ They’ve already heard us .”

Sebastian whipped his head to a stall on his left. The door was closed, and the lights off, but … He shared another nod with Matheo. The intruders were there.

“If you don’t come out in the next ten seconds, we will show substantially less mercy than we are currently inclined.”

“Wait! Fuck—Sebastian, it’s me. It’s Drystan.”

Sebastian’s jaw slackened, just as Matheo’s bow sagged.

That was, indeed, Drystan’s voice.

“Drystan?” Sebastian took a hesitant step toward the stall. “What are you?—”

The stall door swung open, and out tumbled a rather rumpled looking Drystan, straw stuck in his golden hair, shirt and trousers askew.

And behind him followed an equally disheveled Feran, shit-eating grin on his face.

Sebastian’s shock struck him across the face just as Matheo burst out laughing.

“I fucking knew it !”

Drystan glared at Matheo. “Knew what?”

Matheo wiped a finger under his eye, still bent over in hysterics. “This! I knew there was something happening here!”

Drystan shifted his stance. “And this is funny to you why?”

“Alright, easy, Drys,” Feran said, coming up to stand beside Drystan. His hand brushed Drystan’s, and the golden-haired warrior relaxed. Just a touch.

And Sebastian still gaped like a fish.

“I think you broke my brother,” Matheo said, still chuckling.

That finally shook something loose in Sebastian, like netting being cast aside. He cleared his throat, more heat clawing up his neck.

“What is—” He tried. He cleared his throat again. “How did—” Again, the words wouldn’t come.

Drystan and Feran shared a look. Feran nudged him with a bare shoulder before turning to Matheo.

“Come on, little Riqui. I’m hungry. Let the adults speak.”

Matheo rolled his eyes. “You know, I hate that nickname.”

“Nickname?” Feran furrowed his brows. “Is it not just … your name?”

“Riqueti. Our family name is Riqueti.”

“That’s what I said. Riqui.”

“Doesn’t that mean ‘rabbit’ in Kreah?”

“And that’s what you are. Little rabbit.”

Matheo’s response was lost to Sebastian’s ears as he and Feran disappeared down the hall, leaving Drystan and Sebastian there, staring at each other.

Drystan smiled, somewhat sheepishly. “I am … sorry you had to find out like this.”

Sebastian took a deep inhale, slowly breathing out through his mouth. He ran a hand through his hair, brushing out the tidy brown strands.

“I didn’t …” He swallowed. “I didn’t know you …”

“Preferred men?” Drystan shrugged. “I didn’t either, for a long time. I thought I was just different from the rest of you. Women are beautiful, of course, but they just … were never for me, I suppose.”

Sebastian nodded. “Why didn’t you … I don’t know, tell me?”

“You know how it is in Onita,” Drystan murmured. “This is just one of those things no one talks about. For all our technology and advancement, we still can’t accept people loving who they love.”

Sebastian knew. It was why he so adamantly believed in Mariah. It wasn’t just women she could help; the change she wanted to bring could impact people of all kinds across the entire kingdom.

But that wasn’t what bothered him.

“I understand, Drystan. But … why not tell me ?”

It was Drystan’s turn to flush. “I don’t know. I probably should have, shouldn’t I?”

Sebastian barked a laugh, and it was like the tension was broken. He strode forward, clasping Drystan on the shoulder. “Yeah, you should have.” He met his friend’s golden stare. “I’m happy for you.”

Drystan smiled tentatively. “While I am still a little embarrassed you found us in a stall … thank you.”

Sebastian glanced around the quiet stables. “That reminds me,” he said. “What about Feran? And how long?”

Drystan cast his eyes down, golden hair falling into his face. “Feran’s mother is Kreah. He spent the first part of his life raised very differently than a typical Onitan. He has never been ashamed of himself. Which is someone who enjoys the company of women … and men.

“As far as … well, us,” Drystan continued, adjusting his shirt. “It started shortly after Mariah went missing. With everything falling apart, we became the only thing to hold each other together.”

Sebastian’s mind raced, flashbacks of a dozen little moments circling. Times when Drystan and Feran volunteered for battlement duty together, or always seemed to appear places together, or the time Drystan had shown up to breakfast wearing a shirt a lot like the one Feran had worn the day before …

“I feel like an idiot,” Sebastian finally said, smiling.

Drystan cocked his head. “You do?”

Sebastian nodded. “Yes. Because now that I know, I cannot believe I didn’t notice sooner.”

Drystan smiled. “You had a lot on your mind. We all did.”

The two men—friends, brothers, warriors—shared another long look, their smiles growing stronger.

“I’m happy for you, Drystan,” Sebastian repeated before taking a step back. “Truly. I’m glad you and Feran found something together that made you—and us, as a whole—stronger.”

“Thank you, Seb,” Drystan murmured warmly. “Care for lunch? I’m starving.”

Sebastian grinned. “Oh, I’m sure you are.”

The punch Drystan landed on Sebastian’s arm stung far less than the burning in his chest. Drystan had found someone he could truly share forever with.

Sebastian couldn’t let himself think about how much he craved exactly that.