Chapter 18

Saying that dinner was tense would be an understatement. Evander sat beside Enna, but he couldn’t help looking at May every so often, checking to make sure she was all right. After their passionate encounter in the larder, they’d been careful to go their separate ways.

He’d gone to the sparring field, then to his rooms, trying to think of the best way to handle the conversation he would have with Enna. After everything that had happened over the past few days, he knew he could no longer honor the contract between himself and Enna.

Alec had said it was all right if he wished to break the betrothal, and even Enna had said she knew he wasn’t happy with her, and would understand if he was having second thoughts. He had some hope that everything might be all right.

On the other hand, it was one thing to say that she was all right if he’d changed his mind. It was another thing to tell Enna that he’d rediscovered his first love - his only love - and no longer wanted to be with her. He feared that speaking the words would anger her, and cause a rift between them. Worse, it might cause a rift between their clans, and an alliance with Cameron was a powerful thing.

The meal seemed to pass slower than any other meal he had ever had, but finally it was over. Evander rose from his seat and offered his hand to Enna. “Will ye walk with me? We need tae discuss some things.”

Enna inclined her head and put her hand in his. “Let us then.”

He managed to offer May a brief smile of encouragement before exiting the hall, but his stomach was twisting with nerves.

The two of them were quiet as they traversed the halls. Enna seemed content to walk beside him, and Evander couldn’t find any words to break the silence that didn’t seem horribly awkward. When they reached his rooms, he opened the door and let her inside, then shut the door behind him. “Enna…”

Enna reached up and laid a hand on his lips, silencing him. “Ye dinnae need tae say aught, Evander Mackintosh. I already ken what ye want tae say tae me.” Her smile was soft, genuine, but tinged with sadness. “I guessed when first I saw ye look at her, there in the entry hall o’ yer family’s castle, but I hoped I was mistaken.”

Evander swallowed. “Ye kent…?”

“I kent that ye never gave yer heart tae me. That much was obvious, fer all ye wouldnae admit it. I’ve always wondered why, but when I saw the way ye looked at her, the reason was obvious. Ye love May MacPherson, and there’s nae room fer any other woman in yer eyes.”

Evander winced at the words. They were truth, but he’d meant to explain the situation, not force Enna to come to the realization on her own. It sounded almost as if he’d led her on, put like that. “Please believe me, that I didnae enter a betrothal with ye with me heart pledged tae another. When I offered tae wed ye, I thought May had left me behind long ago, and that what I felt was never tae be returned. We hadnae seen each other in ten years. I didnae think I’d ever see her again, let alone still feel so strongly as I dae.”

Enna laughed. “’Tis a strange thing tae hear, after seeing the way she looked at ye, even that first night when ye were so cold tae her.”

Evander flushed. “’Twas a misunderstanding, caused by a deception on the part o’ one o’ her kinsman. We discovered it in conversation on the road.”

“I see.” Enna nodded. “I wondered at yer behavior, and hers.”

Evander grimaced. He thought he’d behaved properly, but he’d clearly revealed more than he’d intended by his actions when May was in Mackintosh Castle. “Enna, I’m fair sorry. I ken ‘tis nae fair tae ye…” He was silenced once more by Enna’s finger on his lips.

“’Tis nay less fair than marrying a man who cannae love me, even if he’s willing tae make the effort.” Enna shook her head gently. “I’ll nae pretend I’m nae disappointed, fer I am. But even so, the truth o’ it is that I want tae see ye happy. More tae the point, I understand well that love’s a powerful thing, something that’s nae tae be denied. Ye look at her as if she’s yer whole world. Ye looked more alive during dinner taenight, just trying tae watch her and pretend nae tae, than ye ever did when ye were with me. There’s more passion and joy in yer face that I’ve ever seen, and I ken she’s the reason.”

He couldn’t deny it. “I tried tae forget her, when I thought she’d forgotten me. But kenning that she didnae forget me, and she still cares fer me... ‘Twas like the sun came out after a century o’ darkness fer me.” He took Enna’s hand. “I’m only sorry that it means I have tae ask ye tae release me from me promise, and apologize if it does aught tae make ye look poorly in the eyes o’ others.”

“As tae the second, it can be explained, and I’ll nae lose me honor, nae when I still have me virtue.” Enna said. “As tae the first... I’ve been thinking tae release ye, even afore I kent why ye couldnae seem tae love me. And now that I ken why ye were always distant toward me, I can dae so with a glad heart, kenning I release ye tae find happiness. And meself tae find happiness as well.”

Evander felt his shoulders relax at the warmth in her words. “I hope ye find a man who’s worthy o’ ye, and can make ye feel as alive and full o’ joy as May makes me feel.” He paused, face flushing as he looked at her. “But ye ken I have tae ask – the alliance…?”

“Will remain. ‘Twillnae be one founded on a marriage, but there are other alliances that can be made, and whatever we negotiate will do better than a union based on an unhappy marriage.” Enna responded. She freed her hand gently from Evander’s. “If ye’ll excuse me, I have some letters tae write and send off, and I believe ye have a lady tae reassure, and two lairds tae speak tae regarding the marriage and alliance ye truly want tae pursue.”

Evander smiled back. “Aye, me lady Cameron. I dae.”

“There are nae hard feelings between us Evander, as disappointed as I am. I hope ye will be happy.”

With one final bittersweet smile, Enna left the room. Evander stood a moment, feeling as if a weight had fallen from his shoulders, then hurried from the room himself.

He had to find May and tell her the news. Then he had to find Laird MacPherson and formally ask his permission to marry May. And after that, he had to write to Alec and tell him everything that had transpired.

His first stop was May’s room. His second was the garden, though night had fallen and there was little to see. From there, he went to the library. There was no sign of May.

Evander felt his stomach clench. He knew May had been at dinner. He’d not heard that she was planning to go anywhere. More than that, she was supposed to remain in MacPherson Keep, for her own safety. She should have been easy to find.

On a whim, he checked the kitchen, then went down to the healer’s cottage, in case she’d needed a headache remedy or something like that. The healer and the cook hadn’t seen her. Feeling frantic, he turned back to the keep proper, determined to find her father and organize a search.

Laird MacPherson met him at the doors to the Great Hall, looking as frantic as he felt. The older man’s face fell. “I’d hoped she was with ye.”

Evander felt something cold in his gut. “Ye mean May? She... I was looking fer her…”

“If se’s nae with ye, then she’s missing. There are guards injured in one o’ the back halls, and sign o’ a struggle. We found a ribbon o’ hers, but May is missing.”

The cold expanded and turned the blood in his veins to ice, filling him with anger and fear in equal measure.

May... I’ll find ye. Nay matter what happens, I’ll find ye and bring ye home safe, even if I have tae storm the gates o’ hell tae dae so.

May woke with an ache in her head, and ropes binding her wrists and ankles, along with a gag and a blindfold. She was lying on rough stone, and the smell in the air was musty and chilled, as if she was in a place that wasn’t often occupied.

With an effort, she cast her mind back to the last thing she recalled. She’d been on her way to her rooms, to wait for Evander. She knew he’d gone to talk to Enna, as he’d promised, and she’d decided it would be easiest to wait for the outcome of that discussion in her chambers. She’d been most of the way there when a guard had approached her.

The guard had worn MacPherson colors, but she’d known in an instant that he wasn’t one of her father’s men. She’d grown up with the guards of the keep around her, whether they were older warriors, or boys beginning to learn the craft of being a soldier. She’d had time to reacquaint herself with them since she’d retuned from her aunt’s. This man was not one she knew.

She’d tried to back away, to call for help, but he’d realized her plan and pounced before she could escape. A blow to the head, and her world went dark.

May grimaced behind her gag. There was no question in her mind that the soldier had been sent by Scot MacDonell. Even less question in her mind that he’d kidnapped her again. She did wonder how they’d gotten her out of MacPherson Castle, but that was a matter to be addressed after she escaped. Or was rescued.

In the meantime, she had to try to get the gag loose, so she could breathe properly. And the blindfold, so she could see. With luck, she’d find a way to escape the bindings as well, though they felt well tied and unyielding on her first attempt.

She began to rock her face gently on the floor, trying to push the cloth to loosen it. She’d barely begun, however, when a sharp voice spoke. “Stop that.”

May froze at the sound of the voice. She heard footsteps approaching and lay still, wondering if she could somehow convince whoever it was to release her. Or at least remove the gag and blindfold.

To her surprise, she heard the creak of leather and rustle of fabric as the person in question crouched. Then rough fingers tugged the knots of the gag and blindfold free, and yanked the cloth away. May blinked up at her captor.

Scot MacDonell stared at her with impassive eyes. Then, without warning, his hand whipped forward and slapped her, so hard her other cheek hit the stone and made her yelp in pain. “Did ye think ye’d be allowed tae escape me again?”

May glared at him, despite the ache in her cheek and the iron tang of blood in her mouth. “Dae ye think ye can take me captive again, without consequence?”

“Aye. That I can.” MacDonell smiled thinly, then grabbed her shoulder and heaved her to a sitting position. He cut the bindings on her ankles, then hauled her roughly to her feet. His hand fastened like an iron manacle around her upper arm, so tight it hurt. “Come with me.”

May tried to dig her heels in, but MacDonell was far stronger than she was. “Where are ye taking me?”

MacDonell paused. His hand touched her face, the gentleness of the gesture a mocking contrast to his brutality of moments before. “Tae find the priest that’ll marry the two o’ us. I’ll nae risk ye getting away a second time. Ye’re staying next tae me, in me sight, until we’re wed and we’ve had our wedding night.”

It was on the tip of her tongue to tell him it was too late, that she was no maiden, but fear for Evander stilled her tongue, not that Scot MacDonell gave her any time to speak. Instead, he turned around and jerked her to the door. May staggered after him, unable to do anything else as he pulled her along. She was afraid that if she fought or fell, he’d simply drag her across the ground.

She needed to bide her time. Surely there would be some opportunity to escape. She had to be ready to take it when it presented itself.

She was determined to get back to Evander, no matter what it took. And equally determined that if Scot MacDonell managed to force her into wedlock, the wedding night would end in a dead body – preferably his.