15. Bray

Chapter fifteen

Bray

That fierce possessive light in her eyes stays with me all afternoon. I’m leaning over the Carmichael’s ancient silver sedan, changing spark plugs and doing an oil filter on a service I’ll probably see a third of what I should actually receive, but I’m not unhappy.

Engines make sense. People confuse me.

Indeed, just thinking about the way she kissed me, my lips still tasting like her, it’s all baffling. I can still feel every curve pressed against me. Why would she throw it all away and go back?

Footsteps draw me back to the here and now, and I look up and spot my door closing plunging the shed back into the semi-dark I was working in. I tense and strain, listening for someone in here. There’s only one person who can sneak up on me, and as tension builds, my suspicions are confirmed when I catch the scent of pine. Seconds pass in an agony of anticipation, and then a huge hand wraps around my wrist, yanking it behind me, gouging into the pressure points until I let go of the spark plug with a curse. The scent of Shane fills the air, and my mind sluggishly tries to catch up as I drown in his intoxicating scent.

If this were anyone else, I might panic, I might be afraid, but my traitorous body is pumping with excitement sizzling in my blood, sending everything happy straight to my cock. If he wanted to kill me, I’m not sure I’d fight him.

I attempt to swing back, but I’m suddenly pressed against the car and held still. Nothing I do frees me. I fight, though; I give it everything until I’m panting, and only then do I slump, exhausted and so very aroused. Why is it so hot to be overwhelmed by him? I’m sick, I know it.

“What do you want, Shane? Come to warn me off?” I ask bitterly.

Shane says nothing. He reaches out and takes my rag from my back pocket. I tense but don’t move when he slides his hand up my wrist to my shoulder. I tremble, but I decide to play this out, see if it bites me in the ass like usual.

I exhale sharply, but then he wraps the rag over my eyes, blinding me. My heart thumps hard. This could be a setup. This could be revenge.

Who fucking cares?

He ties it up and then grabs something that smells intensely of Erin and shoves it in my mouth, silencing me. I moan around the fabric.

Shane leaves me, then. I strain to hear his steps as he moves away from me, but then the door locks. The disappointment that had grown turns to dust. My whole body feels electrified. I turn towards his steps as he walks back to me.

His hands land on my chest, huge and hot. I let out a groan and slide my fingers up his body. Have I wanted to do this since I met him? Yes. Totally and completely. The first moment I met him, I knew I wanted this.

Why today, why now?

Wait, I don’t care. He pulls my singlet up and off me, then slides his huge hands over my pecs and over my abs. My skin almost seems to vibrate where he touches me. I lean forward, pressing my face to his neck, closing the distance between us.

If this is a joke…I roll my hips against his, and there it is, proof that it’s not all me.

I moan, but Shane grabs my hair and pulls the panties out of my mouth. His mouth covers mine, his tongue dueling with mine. Kissing Shane is like kissing a mirrored version of myself. We’re two sides of the same coin. We fit. It’s effortless and easy.

Like breathing.

Please, don’t let this be a dream.

Why can’t he see that we’d be perfect? Why doesn’t he see how good we could be?

Shane licks up my jaw and growls. It’s so vicious that I shiver in response. I’m still reeling when he drops to his knees and starts pulling at my belt.

I gasp and catch myself with one hand on the car, while my other hand threads through his hair.

Shane Hutchins, my enemy, rival, and biggest fantasy doesn’t mince words. He grips my shaft in his hand and strokes me hard. I’m barely coming to terms with that when he takes the tip of me into the hot heaven of his mouth.

I let out a strangled sound, my fingers curling around the metal of the hood of the car. I have to fight back the urge to thrust into his mouth. All I want to do is reach up and tear my blindfold off. I just want to see him, but somehow, I know if I remove it, it’s over.

I don’t want this to be over.

I stroke his head, finger-combing those sun-kissed locks of his. He takes me deeper, working his tongue around me. I tremble, and just the knowledge that Shane is on his knees for me has me close to coming. I work my fingers down the side of his face.

I think he leans into my hand, but I can’t be sure.

“Shane,” I whisper.

He sucks harder and takes me deeper before he starts bobbing his head, setting a pace that brings me instantly to a fight with my desire, a fight not to end this too soon.

“Shane, wait, I don’t want-”

He grips my ass and pulls me towards him, taking me deep into his throat. That strangled sound becomes a moan as my mind obliterates and splinters around me. He pulls back and swallows me again, pushing me over the edge. I clench my fingers in his hair, holding him on my dick as a cry escapes from me.

He draws back, sucking lightly. I shudder as the edge of my orgasm recedes, leaving me an exhausted mess. His hands crawl up my thighs, explore my balls, trace the contours of my body. The touch is sensual and hesitant.

I stay still, terrified to move. I don’t want this to end.

He leans forward, presses a kiss to my abs, and rests his forehead against me.

“What am I doing?”

The words hurt. Me, you’re doing me. Please.

He stands up, and I hear him step away. I yank off the blindfold and grab my jeans, yanking them up. I move quickly, slamming him into my door before he can get it open.

“Let me,” I lick my lips, suddenly so nervous I can barely speak. “Let me take care of you.”

Shane thumps his head on the door. “You don’t need to.”

“No, I want to-”

“No. I already just… fuck! Pretend this didn’t happen.”

I press closer against him, desperate to find some way of reaching him. “I can’t. It’s all I ever wanted.”

Shane stiffens. “I have to go. This was a test. We both failed. I…no, this was a mistake.”

I almost howl. Instead, with defeat, I step back and watch as the alpha who has starred in all my fantasies walks out of my life like nothing happened.

I arrive at the cabin late and tap lightly on the door. I’d gone over this a thousand times. After this afternoon, I’m more shook than I expected. I shouldn’t come, I should…I should turn and go home, I should keep going, don’t be a coward. Back and forth. Over and over. In the end, I came. Why?

Because of her kiss.

Because Shane came to me now, after all these years.

I have to find out. I have to take this chance.

The door opens, and I almost groan when I find Shane standing in front of me. He shifts from foot to foot, and I wonder, in awe, is he actually nervous?

“Do you want to help me grab the pizzas?” I ask hesitantly.

Shane nods sharply and follows me back to my car. The sleek black beast looks beautiful in the low light tonight. A vision of Shane fucking me on it goes through my mind. I can almost feel him sinking into me. Fuck! I need help.

I open the passenger door, but before I can reach for the pizzas, Shane reaches in and grabs them. So close I almost taste his pine scent.

“Shane, about today-”

“There’s no need to talk about it-”

“I don’t regret it. It wasn’t a mistake,” I bite out, frustrated at the stubborn man.

He stares at me without emotion, without anything. But I know him better. I can see that incredible mind of his freaking the fuck out. He is so much smarter than me. His mind is an endless labyrinth of thoughts. I’m just me. He puts the pizzas down really slowly and stands up before I can move away. His fingers close around my throat.

“You don’t regret this? Us?” Shane growls, and I realise three things instantaneously. Shane is in a rut. He’s hard against my stomach, and I’ve never been more turned on in my life.

I pant, sucking in air as his grip tightens. He crowds into my space, his eyes dark and sinister in the shadows.

“No regrets?”

I shake my head.

“Do you want me, Brayson?”

The way he says my name could drop me to my knees. I nod my head.

“How long have you wanted me?” Shane continues and rolls his hips, causing our erections to press against each other.

“All the time that I’ve known you,” I croak out.

Shane studies me, baffled, and then he leans in and licks across my lips. He turns and grabs the pizza while I stand against my car, using it to hold me up as I try to get my head around what just happened.

It takes me five minutes, but I’m still no less confused when I walk into the cabin. Locke bounces up to me and kisses me. Stealing all my thoughts. His scent, that vanilla, is richer and sweeter tonight, and his eyes are glassy. I feel instantly drugged and almost as hard as I was outside.

“Wow, you pack a punch.”

Locke laughs lightly.

His seductive scent wraps around me, and I stand there helplessly enthralled by him.

Finn is sitting on the floor, leaning up against the wall with his legs crossed at the ankle, eating a slice of pizza already.

Shane watches me like a hawk. I grab a piece of pizza and chuck it on a plate and wander to the balcony where Erin is standing. I need to get my feet under me, I need solid ground.

“I love this view.”

“It’s my favourite, too, now.”

She glances back at me and grins. “My ass?”

“Busted!” I wink at her and then hand her the pizza. “Eat. I went and brought dinner.”

She bites into the pizza, and I hum with pleasure.

We stay out there until she finishes, but as soon as she does, I grab her wrist and drag her inside.

I hand her a plate and put more pizza on it. “Eat.”

“Eat,” a deeper voice growls.

My eyes widen as I look up and find Shane staring at me with a plate full of pizza in his hands. I glance at Erin, but she just waggles her fingers and backs away with a whispered sentence I find baffling.

I reach out and take the plate from Shane. Still in the rut. Dangerous. Intent on me. I’m both flustered, aroused, and desperate to see what happens next.

The only information I’ve heard about ruts is rumours or whispers. They are strong periods where the alpha goes into an emotional state of heightened aggression, arousal, or excitement. They feel a driving need to dominate and breed.

My throat feels tight, and I can almost feel his fingers on my skin, pressing, demanding my submission.

I could fight him, but ruts can get violent quickly, and while I want to fight with almost everyone else on the planet, having Shane look at me the way he’s looking at me doesn’t make me want to do anything but get on my knees and open my mouth.

I barely taste the pizza as I eat it, but then, he doesn’t remove his eyes from me the whole time. When I finish the last piece, he crowds into me and rubs his face up the side of my neck and head.

I almost pass out from the giddy, ridiculous feelings that motion brings forth.

As he walks past, I turn to keep him in view. Finn stands up and stares at both of us.

“Well, how long has that been going on?”

I don’t even consider lying. “Since the day we met.”

Shane looks up, his blue eyes pinning me. It’s the right answer. My words soothe him, and he softens, the rut receding.

I think about Erin’s whispered words that’d she’d graced me with earlier. I broke the cage on the giant's self-imposed jail cell. Sorry, not sorry.

What happened last night?

Locke swings towards Shane, and he captures Locke’s hand and pulls him close, staring down at him. I see Shane has the same powerful effect on Locke, making him go completely still.

It’s interesting to watch from the outside.

Erin leans against Finn, her fingers playing with his. Anywhere else, I might feel like a fifth wheel, but this feels right. I don’t feel aggression, resentment, or jealousy as the other’s touch each other. I can see everyone cares. It’s tense and new, but the potential for it to work is right within our grasp.

This is a pack. This is my dream.

I don’t get to keep it.

Fuck, that’s not fair.

Erin glances at me and frowns. I can see she’s going to ask me, but I shake my head and force a smile.

“I’ll be back in a minute,” I blurt out and escape the cabin as quickly as I can. Because when you find your heart’s desire and know you can’t have it, you need a minute.