56. AURELIA

Chapter fifty-six

AURELIA

A s the evening began to settle, everyone got ready for bed, parting toward their tents. With the number of tents and the space they held, we had to sleep two in each tent. The last few nights, it had been Clemmy and I together, with Angie and Luella in the other tent, and the boys in the remaining tents. However, with Abner and Angie sneaking off a lot recently, they announced they would share a tent tonight instead, assigning Damian to my tent with me.

Thick and unrecognizable emotions stirred in my stomach. I wasn't ready to go into the tent with him as everyone else left and slipped into their own, saying their goodnights.

The fire died out, only the embers glowing radiantly within the flames. They burned a bright red, almost the color of blood.

"Don't worry, my Queen, I'll sleep outside tonight." He must've known what I was thinking. He sensed my hesitation, understanding that I wasn't prepared to be thrust into his presence just yet. My emotions were a chaotic mess. Hatred surged within me, mingling with the desire to never lay eyes on him again. But I missed his lips on mine. I missed his touch. I missed the comfort of his smile and the dimple on his cheek that would show every time he laughed. My longing for his touch clashed with the bitter resentment simmering inside me.

With my mind cluttered with a myriad of thoughts, I deflected his comment, unable to address it in that moment. "Do you ever miss home but not want to be home?" I asked, looking in his direction to see his reaction. His soft brown eyes intently watched me, his head tilting to the side. Whispering, I then said, "I fear I can't do this, Damian." A lump formed in my throat, the weight of the Deathlies on my shoulders–the weight of saving my kingdom on my shoulders.

He paused, watching me shift uncomfortably in my seat, never breaking the eye contact that pierced my soul, wondering where his thoughts were taking him. "Don't be afraid of how strong you are and how strong you can become. You have more to yourself than you give yourself credit for, my Queen." He paused, his eyes deepening. "Use your fear as the weapon you are."

I blinked, taking his words in. Sighing, I looked down at my feet. "I'm no weapon, Damian. I'm hardly a dragon rider. A maxz 1 -less dragon rider with no abilities. No chance to save my own kingdom. How am I to save a kingdom from something more powerful than myself? We are running out of time, and I am not sure I can do this anymore." My mind was racing. Everything was telling me to run away. To quit the quest. To give up the crown.

"Aurelia, stop," he interrupted me. "Is this what you want?" I calmed down at the mention of my name on his lips. His hands landed down on my thighs, comforting me, his touch giving me the energy that I needed.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You always have a choice," he said as he paused, his eyes meeting mine. "No matter your decision, I will walk to the end of Haxnau 2 to protect you, because Aurelia, you didn't start these Deathlies. You don't have to take on the responsibility of them. Quest or not. You have nothing that you need to prove to anybody. You are worthy of the crown whether you complete this quest or not. You, Aurelia. Scaleborne or not, you are worthy. Don't want to be here anymore? I'd be the bad guy any day for you, take you wherever you want to go, whatever you want to do. To live your dreams. To be happy, because my Queen, I would kill again and again just to see you smile. Just to see you happy." The dimple on his cheek was gone. His eyes were fueled with a fierceness that I craved about him. "Now tell me. Is this what you want?" I was struck by his abruptness, his desire to make me happy.

The weight of the crown wasn't so heavy on my back anymore. Despite harboring jealousy for it my entire life, it wasn't what I truly needed . My soul yearned for freedom, and being out with the dragons, Damian, and the Scalebornes was the freedom I had craved my entire life without realizing it. However, I couldn't leave my grandmother. There was still a need to help her and my parents, even with our messed up relationships–and Cora. They were depending on me, but I wanted to help them.

Watching the difference the Scalebornes were making in each community, creating peace with dragons, made me wonder the difference we could make together at the level of the kingdom.

Smiling slightly, I glanced back at Damian, confidence filling my voice as I said, "Yes."

"Then I will be with you every step of the way," he said, his fingers squeezing my thigh.

As our gazes locked, a silent understanding passed between us, pulling us closer. The air crackled with anticipation as our movements synchronized, inching us toward an inevitable closeness. The tension was thick between us. My heart pounded as we made eye contact, his soft brown eyes leaning into mine. His right hand lifted, caressing my cheek. His eyes squinted in a way that made me forget everything else in the world. His dimple made my knees weak every time I saw it.

Our bodies drew nearer to each other. The desire to have his lips on mine reverberated in my body. I wanted his hands on my thighs, face, lips, everywhere, and for his fingertips to touch every inch of my body.

Mere centimeters apart, his warm breath brushed against my wind-struck face, sending shivers down my spine and igniting an undeniable yearning for him. However, I couldn't do it. Hesitating, I was held back by the weight of the betrayal lingering in my thoughts. The sorcerer's face and words came to mind. "Tell her."

I couldn't do it.

Pulling my face away, his hands let go, lightly grazing my back as he released the hold of my cheeks. "Goodnight, Damian," I longingly murmured, turning toward the opening of my tent, not wanting to look back at the remorse I knew was shown on his face.

***

Shivering on the cold tent floor, each breath a struggle against the freezing air, I thought of my last interaction with Damian. As I left him, silence hung heavy between us. I anticipated his voice, imagined him expressing regret once more, his words a constant echo in my mind. I longed for him to acknowledge his feelings, to affirm Clemmy's words and the truth I desperately sought.

I wanted him to beg for me–to get down on his knees like I asked before. I wanted him to want me so badly that, even when I pulled away, he pulled me in harder and closer. I wanted his touch to lie thickly on my body and for him to never let me go.

But he didn't. He was respectful of what I said and wanted. But Haxnau , that made me want him even more.

Lying on the ground, my body ached for his to be next to mine. I wanted the warmth of his body and his touch, and the heat from his breath brushing against my ear.

I needed him. I longed for him. I couldn't wait any longer.

There was a fear inside of me that didn't want to be seen as weak, that didn't want to allow the desperation for him to ache inside of my heart. I realized how badly I wanted him, and I never wanted to let him leave me again.

Remembering what Clemmy said pushed me over the edge. "Take it and run." Scales, I wanted to curse both the gatekeepers of Ezu 3 and Haxnau . I wanted to yell at them and tell them their systems were senseless. The need was like a fire burning through me, wanting to yell at the Celestials. There was so much hatred in my body that needed to be released.

Haxnau , I couldn't live without him a second longer. Approaching the door of the tent, my fingers trembled with anticipation as they reached for the roped ties. My numb fingers fumbled with the knot, releasing the tension between the flaps of the tent.

My chest heaved up and down, restlessness filling my body. As I dragged back the tent flap, the moon's feeble glow revealed a shadowy figure looming just beyond the fabric barrier, the form an eerie silhouette against the night.

It was Damian.

The rain intensified, pelting down relentlessly, cascading around him like a curtain of silver. Water streamed from every inch of his form, drenching him completely. His clothes clung to him like a second skin, suctioning to his body as it showed his abs, and every single muscle possibly found on his body.

Strands of his onyx-dark hair plastered to his forehead, while his chest rose and fell with each labored breath. His eyes were intense and sultry as he gazed in my direction.

My heart froze.

He dropped to his knees. "Aurelia, I have never needed anyone more in my entire life. I can't breathe without you. My every thought and desire revolves around you. You once told me that I would beg for you. You were right. This is me. Begging to have you. Begging for you to be mine. Begging for the slightest option that you would give me a second chance. I will take you and love you for everything you ever were and will be. I care for you, Aurelia. Crave you. I've said this before, and I will say it always. But you're the only treasure I ever need. The only gold I could ever want. Please, Aurelia," he begged, his eyes pleading as the rain slipped down his hair, his face, his clothes. He was breathless, panting in need of air.

I couldn't handle it anymore. I knelt to him and pulled his lips to mine. The rain was so thick and showered our bodies. Whatever coldness I felt disappeared with the warmth of his touch, and his skin. Everything about him lit up a fire in my body.

I only wanted him.

We kissed, and I didn't realize the desire that I had for him until I was in his arms. He pulled my legs over his body, pulling me in closer. His hands trailed my back, leading up to my upper body, gripping my hair. His hold was so tight that I knew he would never let me go.

Our tongues collided and melted into each other. My body was electrified. The need for him ached and pounded in every part of me. My veins felt on fire, and my heart was pounding so quickly I wasn't sure it would ever stop.

The wind outside became cold, making our bodies shiver. My fingers clenched the fabric of his shirt with a sudden, unexpected intensity, yanking him into the tent in one swift motion, the flaps remaining open and free, neglected and forgotten.

1. Maxz (Mahz): Ability

2. Haxnau (Hah-nah-woo): Hell

3. Ezu (Eh-ooh): Heaven