32. June

Chapter thirty-two

June

T he taste of copper floods my mouth as I bite the inside of my cheek, willing the pain to ground me. My hands tremble as I grip the edge of the table, knuckles white with tension. The others talk, their voices a dull roar in my ears, but all I can focus on is the hollowness in my chest where Cara should be.

"June, are you even listening?" Natalie's sharp tone cuts through the fog in my mind.

I blink, forcing myself to look up at the faces gathered around the dimly lit room. Natalie's eyes bore into mine, a mixture of concern and frustration etched across her features. Beside her, Judith's lips are pressed into a thin line, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. Song leans against the wall, his usually stoic expression marred by a furrowed brow. And Dante... Dante paces like a caged animal, raw energy radiating off him in waves.

"I'm here," I growl, the words scraping against my throat. "Run it by me again."

Natalie sighs, pushing a hand through her tangled hair. "We've got a lead on Elaine's facility. It's tucked away in the mountains, heavily guarded. But there's a weak spot in their security rotation every third night."

My pulse quickens at the mention of Elaine's name. That bitch. The one who's keeping me from Cara, from our child. My fingers curl into fists, nails digging crescents into my palms.

"And?" I press, leaning forward. "What's the plan?"

"We go in hard and fast," Dante interjects, his dark eyes glittering with anticipation. "Hit them when they least expect it, take out their communications first. Then we find Elaine and make her pay."

A savage grin tugs at my lips. "I like the sound of that."

"Hold on," Judith cuts in, her voice laced with caution. "We can't just go in guns blazing. We need to be smart about this. One wrong move and Elaine could disappear again, or worse..."

The unspoken threat hangs heavy in the air. My stomach churns at the thought of what Elaine might do if cornered. Images of Cara, pale and vulnerable, flash through my mind. Our baby, still nestled safely in her womb, oblivious to the danger that surrounds us all.

"Judith's right," Song says quietly, pushing off from the wall. "We need a solid plan. In and out, minimal casualties. Our priority is gathering intel and neutralizing the threat Elaine poses."

I slam my fist on the table, the sharp crack echoing through the room. "Fuck that! Our priority is making that psychotic bitch suffer for everything she's done!"

The room falls silent, all eyes on me. I feel the rage bubbling up inside, threatening to spill over. My chest heaves as I struggle to regain control, but it's slipping away like sand through my fingers.

"June," Natalie says softly, reaching out to touch my arm. I flinch away from her, unable to bear even the slightest comfort right now. "We understand how you feel, but-"

"No, you don't," I snarl, shoving away from the table. The chair clatters to the floor behind me as I stalk towards the window, pressing my forehead against the cool glass. "None of you understand what it's like to have your entire world ripped away from you. To know that the woman you love, the mother of your child, is lying in a hospital bed right now and you can't even be there to hold her hand."

My voice breaks on the last word, and I squeeze my eyes shut against the burning threat of tears. The silence stretches on, broken only by the sound of my ragged breathing.

"You're right," Judith says eventually, her tone gentler than I've ever heard it. "We can't fully understand what you're going through. But June, you have to trust us. We're all here for the same reason – to keep Cara and your baby safe, and to put an end to Elaine's reign of terror."

I turn back to face them, my jaw clenched tight. "Then tell me how we're going to do that. Because every second we waste planning is another second Cara's alone, scared, and in danger."

Song steps forward, his calm demeanor a stark contrast to the turmoil raging inside me. "We have a contact on the inside. They've been feeding us information, helping us map out the facility. In three days, there's going to be a shift change that leaves a small window of opportunity."

My heart races at his words. "Three days? That's too long. We need to move now!"

"June," Dante says, his voice uncharacteristically soft. "I know you want to tear the world apart to get to Cara. Believe me, I get it. But if we fuck this up, we might never get another chance."

I close my eyes, inhaling deeply through my nose. The logical part of my brain knows they're right, but every fiber of my being screams to act now, consequences be damned.

"Fine," I grit out, opening my eyes to meet their concerned gazes. "Three days. But I want to know every detail of this plan. And when we go in, Elaine is mine."

Natalie nods, relief evident in her expression. "Of course. Let's break it down step by step."

As they begin to outline the intricacies of the raid, my mind drifts to Cara. I picture her lying in that sterile hospital bed, her belly swollen with our child, machines beeping a steady rhythm around her. The thought of her there alone, without me by her side, makes my chest ache with a pain so intense it's almost physical.

I know Judith warned me to stay away, that Elaine might be watching. But the need to see Cara, to touch her, to feel the warmth of her skin beneath my fingers, is an all-consuming fire that threatens to burn me alive from the inside out.

"I need some air," I mutter, cutting through whatever Natalie was saying. Without waiting for a response, I push past them and out into the hallway.

The night air is cool against my flushed skin as I step onto the balcony. The city sprawls out before me, a glittering tapestry of lights and shadows. Somewhere out there, Cara is fighting her own battle, and I'm powerless to help her.

I grip the railing, my knuckles turning white as I lean out over the edge. The wind whips through my hair, carrying with it the faint scent of rain. A storm is coming, both literally and figuratively.

"I thought I'd find you out here," Judith's voice comes from behind me. I don't turn around, but I hear her footsteps as she approaches.

"If you're here to lecture me-"

"I'm not," she interrupts, coming to stand beside me. "I'm here to tell you that I understand."

I scoff, turning to face her. "Do you? Because from where I'm standing, it seems like everyone's more concerned with playing it safe than actually doing what needs to be done."

Judith's eyes flash with something – anger? Pain? – before she speaks. "You think you're the only one who's ever lost someone? The only one who's felt this kind of rage?"

Her words hit me like a physical blow, and I take a step back. "Judith, I-"

"No, you listen to me, June," she says, her voice low and intense. "I know exactly what it feels like to have your world torn apart. To wake up every morning with a hole in your chest where your heart used to be. But I also know that letting that pain consume you, letting it drive you to make reckless decisions, will only end in more heartache."

I swallow hard, the fight draining out of me as I see the raw emotion in her eyes. "How do you do it?" I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. "How do you keep going when everything inside you is screaming to just... give up?"

Judith's expression softens, and she reaches out to place a hand on my arm. This time, I don't pull away. "You find something to hold onto. Something worth fighting for. And you never, ever let it go."

I close my eyes, Cara's face flashing behind my eyelids. Her smile, the sound of her laugh, the way her eyes light up when she looks at me. And our baby – the tiny life we created together, a promise of a future I never thought I'd have.

"I can't lose them," I choke out, my voice thick with unshed tears. "I can't."

"You won't," Judith says firmly. "We won't let that happen. But June, you have to trust us. Work with us, not against us. It's the only way we'll get through this."

I nod, taking a shaky breath. "Okay. Okay, I'll try."

Judith squeezes my arm gently before letting go. "That's all I'm asking. Now come on, let's go back inside and finish hammering out this plan. The sooner we do that, the sooner you can be back with Cara where you belong."

As we turn to head back inside, a sudden gust of wind sweeps across the balcony. I pause, looking out over the city one last time. "Hold on, Cara," I whisper into the night. "I'm coming for you. For both of you. And nothing in this world is going to stop me."

With renewed determination, I follow Judith back into the room where the others are waiting. The next three days are going to be the longest of my life, but I'll endure it. For Cara. For our baby. For the future we deserve.

Elaine doesn't stand a chance. And when I finally get my hands on her, she'll wish she'd never even heard the name June Mayson. That's a promise I intend to keep, no matter the cost.

The darkness embraces me like an old lover as I slip through the night, a wraith in black, every sense honed to razor acuity. The balaclava clings to my face, a second skin, as familiar now as my own flesh. It's a necessary evil, a barrier between the man I am and the monster I have to become.

I scale the wall of Cara's brownstone with preternatural ease, my muscles moving on instinct, every flex and release as natural as breathing. Her window is open, an unspoken invitation that sets my blood thrumming in my veins. I slip inside, a shadow among shadows, the cool kiss of the hardwood floor against my bare feet a shock to my system.

And there she is. My goddess. My salvation. The only light in my pitch-black world.

Cara lies tangled in the sheets, her hair a dark halo against the pillows, her lush curves illuminated by the moonlight filtering through the gauzy curtains. She's bare, save for a thin slip of lace that does little to conceal and everything to inflame, her dusky nipples straining against the delicate fabric.

I must have made a sound, a hitched breath or a low groan, because her eyes flutter open. For a single, suspended heartbeat, she tenses, a flicker of fear chasing across her sleep-soft features. But then recognition dawns, followed by a heat that scorches me to the marrow.

"You came," she breathes, her voice husky with want.

"Always," I rasp, the word scraped raw from my throat. "I'll always come for you, Cara."

She rises to her knees, the slip riding high on her thighs, and crooks a finger at me. An invitation. A command. "Prove it."

I'm on her before the words fully leave her lips, my body covering hers, pinning her to the mattress. She arches up to meet me, all sweet, sleek heat, her lips parting on a gasp as I claim her mouth in a bruising kiss. She tastes of mint and desire, of stolen moments and shattered dreams. I drink her down like a man dying of thirst, like she's the only thing keeping me tethered to sanity.

"I need you," I growl against her lips, my hands roaming the silken expanse of her skin, relearning every dip and curve. "Need to feel you, taste you. Need to bury myself in your heat until I can't remember my own fucking name."

"Yes," she hisses, her nails raking down my back, scoring my flesh through the thin fabric of my shirt. "God, June, please. It's been so long."

I gentle my touch, trailing reverent fingers over the swell of her belly where our child grows. "I'm here, baby. I've got you. I've got you both."

Tears glitter in her eyes, diamond bright in the darkness. "Show me."

I do. With hands and lips and tongue, I worship her. I chart every inch of her body, mapping the changes, committing them to memory. She's softer now, more lush, her breasts heavier, her hips wider. But she's still my Cara, still the only woman who can bring me to my knees with a single look.

I take my time, savoring her, drawing out every gasp and moan and breathy little plea. I lave her nipples with my tongue until they're hard and aching, until she's writhing beneath me, her fingers tangled in my hair. I kiss a trail down her stomach, pausing to nuzzle the sweet curve of her belly, before settling between her thighs.

She's already wet, glistening in the moonlight, her scent heady and intoxicating. I breathe her in, letting her essence fill my lungs, before diving in like a man starved. She cries out at the first touch of my tongue, her hips bucking up to meet me, and I groan against her flesh. She tastes of honey and sin, of everything I'd ever wanted and could never deserve.

I lick and suck and nibble, playing her body like a finely tuned instrument. I tease her clit with fleeting flicks and lingering strokes, dipping inside her to savor her nectar. She's a livewire beneath my ministrations, her thighs quaking, her hands fisting in the sheets.

"June," she pants, my name a prayer and a curse on her kiss-swollen lips. "I'm so close. So fucking close."

I seal my mouth over her clit and suck, hard, slipping two fingers inside her tight, clenching heat. She shatters with a low, keening wail, her inner muscles fluttering around my digits, her essence flooding my tongue. I work her through it, prolonging her pleasure, until she's boneless and sated beneath me.

I crawl up her body, trailing open-mouthed kisses as I go, until we're face to face. She cups my cheek, her thumb smoothing over the coarse stubble. "Your turn, baby. I want to taste you, too."

Desire, hot and urgent, surges through me, my cock throbbing almost painfully behind the confines of my zipper. But I shake my head. "Not yet. I'm not done with you."

I rise to my knees, straddling her chest, my erection jutting obscenely behind the black denim. "Do you trust me, Cara?"

"With my life," she answers without hesitation, her eyes bright with love and longing.

I swallow hard, humbled and shaken by the depth of her faith in me. Then, slowly, deliberately, I unzip my fly, freeing my aching flesh. She licks her lips, hunger and anticipation flaring in those stormy grey depths.

With careful movements, I shimmy forward until my knees bracket her head, my cock bobbing mere inches from her parted lips. Her breath is hot against my sensitive skin, a tease and a torment.

"Open up, baby," I grind out through gritted teeth. "Gonna feed you this cock."

A high, needy sound escapes her as she obeys, her tongue darting out to lathe the leaking tip. I hiss, my hips jerking forward, chasing the silken heat of her mouth. She opens wider, taking me deeper, her throat working around my length as I begin to thrust.

It's heaven and hell, bliss and damnation, her lips stretched around me, her tongue fluttering against the throbbing vein on the underside of my shaft. Every drag of her mouth stokes the fire in my blood, tightens the coil of tension at the base of my spine. But I can't come. Not yet. Not until I'm buried in the slick heat of her cunt.

With a groan, I pull free of her sweet mouth, scraping together the tattered remnants of my control. She makes a bereft sound at the loss, her lips glistening with saliva and pre-cum, and I nearly lose it right then and there.

I wrench off my shirt, baring the tapestry of scars and tattoos that adorn my torso. Cara's eyes roam hungrily over my skin, her hands lifting to trace the ridges of my abs, the curls of ink over my heart. I let her look her fill, let her brand me with her gaze, before settling back between her spread thighs.

The head of my cock nudges her sodden opening and we both groan, our breath mingling in the heated air between us. "I love you," I tell her, cupping her face in my hands. "I love you so fucking much, Cara."

"I love you too," she whispers, her lips finding mine in a kiss that's both benediction and absolution. "Now fuck me like you mean it, baby"

I drive into her with one hard, deep stroke, bottoming out inside her perfect, grasping heat. She cries out, her nails digging into my shoulders, her back bowing off the bed. I pull back and surge forward again, setting a rhythm as old as time itself, our bodies moving in perfect synchronicity.

It's everything. It's not enough. I can't get close enough, deep enough, the need to crawl inside her and never come out a living thing in my chest. I kiss her, devour her, swallow down every moan and whimper as I pound into her harder, faster, chasing the release that shimmers just out of reach.

"Touch yourself," I command, my voice a low, feral rasp. "Make yourself come on my cock, baby. I want to feel you."

Her hand snakes between our sweat-slicked bodies, finding her clit, rubbing in tight, frantic circles. I can feel her tightening, clenching, her inner muscles fluttering around my driving length.

"That's it," I praise, my hips snapping forward, the obscene slap of flesh on flesh echoing in the room. "Fucking drench me, Cara. Let go."

She shatters with a ragged scream, her cunt bearing down on me like a vise, urging me deeper. I follow her over the edge with a hoarse shout, my cock jerking and spurting as I fill her with my seed. It goes on and on, the pleasure cresting and breaking and cresting again, until we're both spent and trembling in the aftermath.

I collapse against her, careful to keep my weight off her stomach, and bury my face in the sweat-dampened curve of her neck. She cradles me close, her fingers combing through my hair, her heartbeat gradually slowing beneath my ear.

"Don't leave," she whispers, so softly I almost don't hear it. "Stay with me. Just for a little while."

I lift my head, searching her face in the darkness. The plea in her eyes, the vulnerability and the desperate, aching love, nearly undoes me.

"I can't," I rasp, the words tasting like bitter ash on my tongue. "It's not safe, Cara. If Elaine finds out-"

"I don't care." Fierce. Defiant. So fucking brave it steals my breath. "I need you, June. We need you. Please."

My resistance crumbles like a house of cards. I can deny her nothing, this woman who holds my heart, my soul, in her gentle hands. "Okay," I whisper, pressing my forehead to hers. "Okay."

We shift and settle, our bodies fitting together like puzzle pieces, my front to her back, my arm draped protectively over her waist. I splay my hand over the swell of her stomach, marveling at the life we've created, the tiny spark of hope amidst the darkness.

"I'm going to fix this," I promise her, my lips brushing the shell of her ear. "I'm going to make it right, Cara. For you, for our baby. I swear it."

She laces her fingers through mine, holding me tight. "I know you will. I believe in you, June. I always have."

We drift off like that, tangled together, clinging to this stolen moment of peace. But even in sleep, the specter of what's to come haunts me. The knowledge of what I have to do, the sacrifices I have to make, weighs heavy on my soul.

I dream of blood and fire, of bullets and blades. Of Cara's screams, high and terrified, as they rip our child from her arms. I dream of Elaine's face, twisted in a cruel mockery of a smile, as she watches me burn.

I wake with a gasp, cold sweat beading on my brow, my heart slamming against my ribs. Cara stirs beside me, her sleepy murmur of concern soothing the jagged edges of my panic.

"It's okay," I whisper, pressing a kiss to her bare shoulder. "Just a dream. Go back to sleep, baby."

She subsides, her breathing evening out, and I lie there in the darkness, staring at the ceiling, my mind a whirlwind of fear and determination.

I can't fail. I won't. Not again. Not when the stakes are this high, the potential for loss this devastating. I'd burn the whole fucking world to ash before I let Elaine take what's mine.

But I can't do it alone. I need allies, resources, a plan so airtight not even my sadistic bitch of a mother can slither her way through. And that means calling in every favor, cashing in every blank check, until I have an army at my back.

Carefully, I extract myself from Cara's embrace, every cell in my body screaming in protest. I dress in silence, the slide of fabric against my skin a mocking caress. At the window, I pause, looking back at the woman who holds my entire existence in her hands.

"I love you," I mouth, the words a vow, a covenant. "Always."

Then I'm gone, slipping out into the night, a wraith once more. The city sprawls before me, a glittering whore, full of false promises and sharp edges waiting to draw blood.

But beneath the neon and the filth, in the hidden places where the lost and the damned make their homes, I will find what I need. The tools, the weapons, the wolves willing to go to war for the sake of one man's vengeance.

Elaine thinks she's broken me. Thinks she can twist me to her purpose, a puppet dancing on strings of lies and manipulation. She has no fucking idea.

She'll learn, in the end, the true meaning of the word regret.