Chapter 34

"Did that just fucking happen?"Christian asks arms crossed over his chest.

We're standing in the gym, considering what our fucking options are. After Lux rushed out of the house, I gave chase, but she'd done a fucking number on my balls, and I didn't get very far.

I'm staring down at my phone, trying to refresh my tracker app, but her last known location was an hour ago. She must have her phone off. Cursing, I shove my phone into my back pocket.

Jackson is pacing, furious. "Fuck, how was that door left unlocked?"

Lucas and I were the last ones through the door, so we should have been the ones to lock it behind us. But no one comes down into the basement, except for the Sacred Sons. It's off-limits, and everyone knows that. Everyone, except Lux, apparently. But honestly, even if she did know, I doubt she'd give a fuck.

But she was up in the bedroom, weakened from what Tyler had given her last night. So, yeah, locking the door wasn't what I was fucking focused on.

For real, though, I'd give my left nut to go back in time and lock that fucking door. The look of abject horror that came over Lux's face will haunt me forever. She saw me. She saw what I'm capable of doing, and she was repulsed by it.

Shaking my head, I discard that thought. I can't dwell on something I can't change. All I can do is move forward.

"What if she goes to the police?" Christian asks, voicing the concern that I'm sure we've all considered.

Lucas glances at Jackson. "You think your uncle could bury it?"

Jackson's uncle and cousin both work for the Malibu police department, and as handy as that can be, there's only so much they can smooth over. There's a new Chief of Police, and the entire department has been under a lot of scrutiny lately.

Jackson leans against the weight machine and shakes his head. "Yeah, no. A dead body is beyond his ability to cover up right now."

I push out a breath. "She won't go to the police," I say. I don't know that, actually, but if the guys see her as a threat, there's no telling what they might do. We took an oath to protect the society at all costs.

"How can we be sure about that?" Lucas asks.

I turn my head and look him dead in the eye, more warning than reassurance. "I'll handle her," I say through gritted teeth. If he dares touch her, I swear to God…

He sighs. "Fine. But I want assurances she's not going to fucking talk."

"Why don't we just initiate her?" Christian offers. "She'd have to take a vow of secrecy—"

"No," I cut in forcefully. "She's not being initiated."

I can't even stomach the fucking thought of that.

"It would solve our problem," Lucas says with a shrug. "She'd have to pledge her loyalty to the society..."

God, this line of thinking is really starting to piss me off. "She's not being initiated," I yell in a burst of anger, my voice echoing off the stone walls. "And that's the fucking end of it." I look at each one of the guys. "I said I would handle her."

The guys have sense enough to back off the topic of initiation.

Jackson sighs, shaking his head. "Let's just hope she didn't go straight to the police station. I'll call my uncle, and ask him to let us know if she shows up. He can give us a heads up, at least."

I nod once, then glance over at Lucas and Christian. "Can you guys handle Tyler?"

Lucas nods. "Yup. We'll take him over to the Fire Pit this afternoon."

Our forefathers passed down more than just the bylaws. They passed down their methods for dealing with threats to the society and its members, as well. We have a long-standing relationship with the local crematorium, known within the society as the Fire Pit. A relationship that goes back generations. We pay them a retainer fee, and they're available to get rid of any refuse we have lying around. It's a pretty symbiotic relationship.

"Good," I say, pushing off the wall. "Now all I need to do is find Lux. Explain shit to her." My eyes meet Lucas'. "She'll come around."

He doesn't say anything, but his expression says, she'd better…

Upstairs, in the living room, there are a few people hanging out. Among them are Wyn and her boyfriend, Gabriel, who also happens to be Lucas and Christian's cousin. They're tangled up in each other, talking, while a few of the guys play pool.

I walk up to the couch. "Yo, Wyn," I say, lifting my chin at her. "I need to find Lux. Has she texted you?"

Wyn is laughing at something Gabriel just said, and she looks up at me mid-laugh. "What? Lux?"

"Yeah, where is she?"

She continues to laugh like my question is absurd. "How would I know?"

"You haven't heard from her?"

She shakes her head, and she must hear the urgency in my voice because her expression falls. "Why? Is she okay?"

"Yeah," I say with a sigh. "I just need to talk to her."

Who else does she know? Then it dawns on me. Ethan-fucking-Ashford.

Fuck.

Anger spikes through me, but I curl my hands into fists and take deep breaths to calm myself. I have to keep my shit together. Everything that's happening with Lux right now, is my own damn fault. Not Ash's fault. Not Lux's fault. And it's my job to fucking fix it.

But, damn, just knowing she could be alone with Ash is eating me up inside.

Keep it together, Roman.

With a grunt, I get into my car and drive the few minutes to Ash's house. I pull up in front and pop out of my car, not bothering to walk up the front door. There's a chance Ash would tell his butler not to answer the door, so I cut out the middle man, and move around to the side of the house, through a gate, and go straight to the back.

Before I even reach the back patio, I hear her laughter. It floats on the breeze, delicate and unmistakable. That laughter that I've seldom induced, and I'm suddenly filled with jealousy that Ash is the one to bring it forward.

For the millionth time, I shove my anger down.

As I come around the corner, I see them on the patio, side by side, talking, laughing. I'm filled with a desperate need to know what they're saying. Are they talking about the events of today? Or sharing some secret inside joke?

I swallow and step forward. They're about fifty feet in front of me, and I can hear Lux say, "Yeah, I don't know."

I clear my throat. "Lux."

She stiffens instantly, and they both turn to face me. "Roman…" she says, scrambling to her feet. It's clear she's afraid—of me, I'm guessing. And I deserve that. What she saw earlier wasn't pretty.

"Wow, that was quick. Who told you she was here?" Ash asks, standing as well. He shifts, so he's just slightly in front of her, and I realize, it's to protect her. Normally that would piss me off, and it does, but Ash isn"t my focus right now, so I don't even look at him. My focus is locked on Lux.

"Can we talk?"

She blinks like she's trying to wake herself up from a dream. Or a nightmare. "I don't think that's a good idea."

I step forward, and Ash flinches. I hold out my hand. "I'm not angry, I just…" Fuck, this is hard. "I need to explain."

Maybe I shouldn't have said that because she huffs and shakes her head. "There's nothing to explain, is there? What happened, happened."

"Lux, you're not safe," I say. I want to tell her that Tyler was working with someone and that someone obviously wants her hurt. But I can't say that in front of Ash.

Ash speaks up then, the fucking cunt. "No worries man. I've got her. You can go back to whatever frat party you came from."

Keeping my anger in check with Ash so close to Lux, acting like he's her protector, is nearly killing me. But by some miracle, I manage to keep myself in check, but just barely.

"Ash," I say, finally acknowledging him. "Can you give us a minute?" I pause, and dig deep into my soul…"Please." I practically vomit the word, but I can see the shock on both Ash and Lux's faces.

Ash glances at Lux, and she nods once, giving him the okay to leave. Wow, she really is a queen. She's already got Ash and me wrapped around her fucking finger.

Ash doesn't look thrilled, but he starts walking toward the house nonetheless. "I'll be right inside if you need me."

"Thanks," Lux says, her gaze never leaving mine. Once the sliding glass door clicks shut, she crosses her arms and shifts her weight. "Okay. What do you want to say?"

God, what do I want to say? I've never been in this position before. I've never had to explain myself, let alone to a girl I'm supposed to hate.

"Yeah, I'm not sure what I can say, Lux." I take a step toward her, and she stays put, holding her ground. "But I'm sorry you had to see that."

Her stance is rigid. Guarded. "Is he dead?"

"Yes." I take a step toward her, but she shakes her head and I stop. "It had to be done, Lux. He wasn't going to stop coming after you."

She nods slowly like she hears what I'm saying, and all the tension drains from my body. But something inside me says it's not going to be that easy. Not with Lux.

"And someone was helping him," I say. "Someone who obviously wants to hurt you."

She has no response to that.

"Come back to the house," I say. "Let me take care of you."

"That's not going to happen. Against my better judgment, I trusted you, and then I walked in and saw—" Her gaze falls to my hand, free of blood now, and she shakes her head, unable to finish that sentence. "...so forgive me if I'm not interested in being a part of that."

I resist the urge to grab her arms and pull her against me. I need to touch her, to feel her, to listen to the air entering her lungs. "I'm not going to hurt you, Lux."

Not yet. The words flutter across my mind uninvited.

She shrugs, arms still crossed. "You should leave."

There's a long, awkward silence as I wait for her to take back her request. When she doesn't, I do the only thing I can do—the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life, I turn around and leave Lux with the guy I hate most in the world…