13. Sawyer

13

"Sawyer… I swear to God, you're too damn distracted these days." Kaden manages to sprawl over the bar while sitting on a stool. His spiky hair makes him look like a sexy hedgehog. He's my friend Bee's beta and has been a friend of mine since he moved across the street with his pack, before he even met her.

"Hm… am I?"

"Look what you're doing, man."

"What am I… Oh, shit!" Frantically I grab the rag to mop the spilled coffee from the coffee machine I've been cleaning. "No, no, no…"

"Calm down," Kaden says with a huff. "It's not the end of the world. Just a spill. Here, let me help."

He's already standing up, but I lift my hand. "No, don't."

He frowns. "But?—"

Dropping the rag in the sink, I walk out from behind the bar, stuffing my hands into my pockets. "Keep an eye on things for me, will you?"

"Where are you going?"

"Up. I have to feed Potato."

"Who is… your pet plant?"

"Cat."

Now his brows arch. "Since when do you have a cat?"

"It's a recent acquisition. I…" I hate how my voice shakes. I can feel the anxiety building like music, gripping me, rising toward a crescendo. "I took him in recently."

"An emotional support animal?"

I flinch. Too close to the mark. "Something like that. I'll be back in five."

"And if someone wants coffee?"

"Tell them I'm on my way!"

He's grumbling under his breath but I ignore him as I race out of the café and up the stairs to my apartment. My heart is thumping hard, my vision is blurring, and I manage drop my key in front of my door, and then hit my head on the door handle as I get back up.

Dammit.

Also, ow. That hurt. I hope my eye won't turn black.

I unlock the door, my hands by now shaking so badly I can hardly insert the key.

But the moment the door opens, a meow greets me, followed by a small gray shape walking daintily toward me.

"Hi," I whisper, dropping to my knees, reaching for him. "Come here."

Yeah, Potato exists, I didn't make him up just to escape.

And yeah, I found him in an alley nearby one day when it was raining, this tiny grey furball who marched right up to me and meowed pitifully until I took him in my arms.

The rest is history.

He purrs as he rubs himself against my jeans-clad legs, then climbs right into my lap and headbutts me until I give him some head rubs.

The anxiety starts to melt out of me, like some evil dark sap that solidified in my veins, now turning to liquid and seeping out of me.

Potato bats at my hand, then shoves his little head under it, rising on his hind paws to exact his dues. I scratch behind his ears and he purrs louder, like a small engine.

My own personal tiny stress-relief machine.

"Good boy," I whisper as he finally relaxes and curls up on my thigh. I stroke his back with my finger as he goes to sleep right then and there. I wish I could drop off to sleep instantly, like him. "Good kitty."

I stay like that for a while. I told Kaden five minutes, but I haven't even glanced at my phone to see how much time has passed. I want… to stay here, hidden away. But it won't help. My responsibilities can't be taken over by anyone else. And the main reason I'm so stressed…

You know the main reason, Sawyer. You just don't want to face it.

Yeah. Tomorrow I'm supposed to meet the pack my parents have chosen for me. They've been throwing me at various packs of their choosing ever since I awakened as an omega. Since I was a teenager. They thought, apparently, that meeting my pack early would be a good thing. I'd bond with them and become officially a pack the moment I became an adult.

But as time wore on and I refused every pack offer, they got mad at me. Cue the loan I asked from them, and the subsequent extra pressure, now laced with threats, and I'm so done.

What if I never find the perfect pack? The perfect scent-match, the perfect mates? What if my parents are right, and I just need to agree to a pack, letting my parents pick and choose? I'd only have to tie the knot—ha!—and maybe then…

Maybe I wouldn't feel as if the weight of the world is resting on my shoulders.

Melodramatic, I know. It's just renting out the apartments, the café, the shelter, the book club… all things of my own choosing. Sure, I have the loan hanging over my head, but with time, I will pay it back.

But imagine not having that anymore, and having mates who will take care of you, share the workload, take care of the apartment… mates who will hold you like I'm holding Potato now, who will stroke and hug and kiss you.

Sex would be a welcome perk, too. Especially since, lately, I feel like my body is… asking for sex. It feels weird, like I get so easily hard and I have all these wet dreams, like I'm a teenager all over again.

But I bet it's from seeing Brinlee more often. She sure stars in quite a few of my dreams. And that pack… Kyrian, Archer and now Roman, they're also to blame. Last night's dream featured two of them.

Shit, is it getting hot in here?

Potato stirs, opening one eye and giving me a tiny, annoyed meow. It's so cute and funny I snort.

"Yeah, you don't approve of my smutty dreams." I gently lift him, disentangling his little claws from my jeans and my flesh, and deposit him on the carpet. "Got it. You're too young for such things anyway. You wouldn't understand."

Another annoyed meow.

But I really have to get back to work, back to the real world. Unfortunately, I can't put it off forever…

On my way back down the stairs, I almost crash into a pretty lady in a pencil skirt and high heels, her hair swept back in a chignon.

She grins at me. "Hey… Sawyer. How is it hanging?"

It's Sophie, my tenant, living in the apartment below mine. She's an alpha, a flight attendant, and a sexy goddess. I'm not attracted to her, but I can appreciate beauty when I see it, and she's golden inside and out. After Bee, and then Gigi and Ronin and Casey all moved out of the apartment to join their packs, she was alone for a while. Now she has two new roommates, acquaintances of Zayne's, Gigi's top alpha who works at my gym. They seem nice.

And now she's giving me a narrow-eyed look—not dissimilar to the one Kaden was giving me ten minutes ago. Or was it longer?

"I'm great. Just busy, busy. You know how it is."

"You look stressed," she says.

How can everyone see right through me? I ask you.

"Life is stressful sometimes." I smile, but she only narrows her eyes more. "Gotta go. I left Kaden in charge of the café."

"Are you crazy? He'll burn the place down!" she calls after me as I bound down the rest of the stairs. "And slow down!"

Can't. Can't slow down. I have to meet this pack, get it out of the way, and then hopefully things will calm down for a while, until my parents locate another pack.

Until life throws me another curveball.

Also, what's wrong with leaving Kaden in charge of the café? He's a serious guy. He's also my hero, since he saved Bee from her vicious ex and almost died doing so. Sure, he can't make a good coffee to save his life, at least by my standards, but so what? Manning the bar for a few minutes surely wasn't a problem for him.

But the moment I burst into the café, I find him in a state of quiet panic, standing by the bar and wringing his hands together.

When he sees me, he points an accusing finger at me. "Sawyer. Man, you even left your phone here, and there are customers. What the hell am I supposed to do? I called Bee, but she's in a class?—"

"It's fine, I'm here now. Sorry."

"Don't mention it, man, but there are a few customers and they were asking for you by name, so just, you know, pop over there to say hi. I have to get going."

"Yeah, okay, but first I need to clean up the mess…" I glance at the bar and the coffee machine where the puddle of spilled coffee was when I ran away, and… it's shining with cleanness. The sponge and the rag are wrung out and spread to dry over the sink. "Uh… You cleaned up the mess?"

He winks at me. "You owe me a coffee. See ya later!"

"See you," I mutter, a grin tugging at my mouth. Seeing it all so clean and tidy makes my heart glad. Damn, he's a good friend. I need to bake him some cake.

Grabbing my notepad, I go greet these customers who know me by name. Can't be Gigi's pack, Kaden knows them all well. He'd have told me. My next guess would be people from my book club or the gym where I occasionally drag myself for some exercise. Casey drags me, to be exact. Or Gigi, sometimes. Crazy exercise-addicted people.

But as I make my way to the far end of the café, close to the bookshelves area, I find my steps slowing down. Three men are standing by the shelves. Roman is holding an open book in his hands. The two alphas are talking, but stop the moment I appear.

"What do you want?" I whisper, my throat closing, and I'm not sure if it's emotion of some sort, caused by their appearance here, or… their scents.

Fuck, their scents… they blend together into an intoxicating aroma that makes my mouth water. I smell caramel and tobacco and leather and male musk, and though I always thought I was more attracted to girls than boys, these boys right here may prove to be the exception to my rule.

"This is my new favorite café," Archer says, smirking at me, hands in the pockets of his dark blue pants. That five o'clock shadow beard on his jaw is killing me. I want to run my tongue over it.

But then Kyrian produces a soft snort, grabbing my attention, and oh fuck… He's leaning against the wall, those inked, muscular arms folded over his chest, black tank top and cargo pants hugging his body. His icy gaze is on me.

Then there's Roman, who has closed the book he took and is now putting it back on the shelf—hopefully at the same spot he took it from. He smiles as he turns back around, his dark eyes dancing.

Did they decide to tick off all my boxes? Jesus.

Please, dear Lord, can I have a sexy power alpha in a suit, an inked grumpy hottie, and a graceful sex-bomb of a beta tormenting me?

Why, sure, dear boy, let me check what I have in stock. You're in luck. Here you go. I give you the McGraw Pack!

Everything that excites me in a man is right here, in front of me. It's a list that hadn't existed, not voiced out loud, anyway, until now. It's as if by coming here they made it real.

But I still want Brinlee.

And so what? I almost hear Kaden say in my ear, although he's already gone from the café. Isn't that what we have packs for?

Roman takes a step toward me, his smile faltering. "Sawyer?"

Oh fuck, I'm doing it again. Spacing out. I hope I'm not staring at them all bug-eyed and with my mouth hanging open.

Rallying my thoughts, I clear my throat. "Yes. Apologies. What will you have?"

Kyrian's eyes narrow. Archer's smirk widens, and Roman rubs his chin.

"That's almost like asking for it," he says.

"For what?" I ask.

"Roman," Kyrian growls. "Don't."

Roman chuckles. It's a yummy sound, a trickle of dark syrup. "Never mind. I'll have a black coffee, and whatever cake you have."

I nod, although the only cake I have is Angelic, and I only offer it to friends. "Sure. Anything else?"

"I'll have a black coffee as well," Archer says, and Kyrian will have one, too."

Kyrian glares at Archer but doesn't contradict him. Wait, actually… his glare isn't on Archer.

It's fixed on me.

Instinctively, I take a step back when Kyrian suddenly pushes off the wall. "What…?"

"The hell." He strides over to me, grips my chin in a steel grip, and turns my head to the side, before I have a chance to protest and ask what the hell he's doing. "What happened? Who did this?"

"I… Who did what?"

"This bruise. Who hit you? Tell me their name and I'll cut off their dick and fuck them with it," he growls.

I blink, something warm spilling into my chest. I really shouldn't like this behavior from this alpha I barely know, an alpha I dislike and find hot at the same time. If Eric did this, I'd kick him in the dick.

And it hits me how funny it is that this exact same dialogue and situation took place recently between me and Brinlee.

Swallowing hard, I put my hand over Kyrian's and tug it away—or try to. "Nobody did."

"Bullshit. You will tell me, and I will find them."

I want to laugh at the notion, but I also want to smile at him. Neither of which is a good idea.

"Let me get you the coffees and cake," I say. And we can talk."