Chapter XXXIII

P emberley was everything her friends had told her it was. Therein lay Elizabeth's dilemma.

Elizabeth had never considered herself to be any more virtuous or immoral than the next woman, though she had always known her motives regarding the marriage state were far more laudable than most of her level of society could boast. With Jane, she had always resolved to marry for nothing other than the deepest love; marrying for pecuniary reasons, status, or other such concerns was repugnant. Life was far too short to waste it with a man she could only tolerate for reasons of begetting an heir, or because he could support her.

Yet, as she walked the grounds of Pemberley, drinking in the sights and sounds, the beautiful vistas spread out on every side, how could one not be affected? To be the mistress of such a place as this must be something, indeed!

Thus, Elizabeth contended with her feelings, trying to sort through them until convinced she knew her own heart. The first and most important point was the state of her affection for Mr. Darcy, and she knew she must separate those feelings from her impressions of the man's home, or she would never understand what she must do.

The others of the company were certainly no help. Their journey to Derbyshire had not been precisely the leisurely meandering path they had originally intended. Mrs. Gardiner had convinced her husband to make for Derbyshire with, while it might not be all haste, they did not take in all the sights they had thought to see before. Mr. Gardiner had not been at all disinclined, for he had been interested in meeting Mr. Darcy and seeing Pemberley. While they made a few stops, most notably at Blenheim Palace, it was only five days after they departed when they rolled onto Pemberley's drive. Then the most amusing scene took place.

"Miss Elizabeth," Mr. Darcy had said as he assisted her from the carriage, Mr. Gardiner stepping back to allow it. "And Miss Mary. How wonderful it is to welcome you to my home."

"I am certain at least part of that is correct," said Mary, a rare jest issuing from her lips. "As Lizzy is who you wish to see, I shall greet Georgiana."

The company laughed and Mary exchanged enthusiastic greetings with her friend. Thereafter, Elizabeth provided the introductions, her head still full of Mr. Darcy's affectionate greeting and the impression of his lips on her hand. When the party were all acquainted with each other, they entered the house, the travelers to their rooms to refresh, and then gathered in the sitting-room.

The house was, of course, imposing, impossibly fine, and even beautiful. What set it apart from Blenheim or any other great house Elizabeth had ever seen—especially Rosings Park! —was the homey feeling it exuded, as if the place were a beloved dwelling rather than some dusty monument to a family's history. Soon after they gathered, Elizabeth made this observation to Mr. Darcy; she could see at once that she had pleased him immensely.

"That is the way I see Pemberley, Miss Elizabeth. Tourists visit every summer, and Mrs. Reynolds, I dare say, enjoys praising the house, the grounds, and the family more than any Darcy. But while they see a large house finely furnished, I see a home every time I look upon it."

It was an insight into Mr. Darcy's character, and one Elizabeth did not think she would get anywhere else. The gentleman was, she had noted, more at ease in his home, even with the Gardiners, with whom he had never been acquainted. With Mr. Gardiner, he seemed at ease at once, likely due to her uncle's excellent manners. With Mrs. Gardiner, he exchanged some comments about Lambton and the people who lived there, provoking Mrs. Gardiner's eagerness to see the sights and meet those people of her youth with whom she kept in contact. Mr. Darcy even promised a phaeton with which she and her husband could tour the grounds—Mrs. Gardiner was no great walker.

Returning her attention to Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth watched him as he conversed with her uncle, all her previous notions of his pride and superiority overthrown for good. She had known of his better nature than she had initially supposed for some weeks now, but the relaxed, slightly animated Mr. Darcy was a man with whom she was not familiar. It became him well, she decided before five minutes had passed. Elizabeth did not need a lively man, for she was lively enough for them both. What she wished to have was a kind and thoughtful man, a man who would greet her relations with respect and dignity, who would treat her with the same and love her as she wished to love him. For perhaps the first time, even more than those few short weeks in Hertfordshire, she understood Mr. Darcy might be that man.

In retrospect, Elizabeth knew what happened next should not have surprised her. After all, she had ample experience, both in Rosings Park and in Hertfordshire, of Lady Catherine's determination to know everything, to tease the most insignificant details of a person's life from their unwilling lips. Lady Catherine already had a firm grasp on the elements of Elizabeth's immediate family, having taken their measure and imparted her brand of advice intended to improve them. From the letters Elizabeth had received from home, Kitty and Lydia had settled in with their companion, Mrs. Grant, and were hopefully learning what they would need to learn to become creditable young ladies.

No, the Bennet family was no longer a concern in Lady Catherine's mind. It was the extended relations, those who existed in the detested realm of trade and who were, apparently, in no hurry to leave it. In Lady Catherine's mind, she must determine if they were suitable to be relations of her dear nephew, and Lady Catherine was never one to shirk from a self-imposed duty. For the first few hours after their arrival, the lady was quiet and watchful, taking their measure and learning what she could of their manners. It was only after dinner that her interrogation began.

"Mr. Gardiner," said the lady, addressing her uncle, "I heard it said you are the proprietor of a prosperous business in London. Might I ask what manner of business it is?"

Mr. Gardiner, no fool, had expected the inquisition, for he was not slow to respond. It seemed Mr. Darcy had not either, for while he shook his head in exasperation, he listened and took part in the ensuing conversation. For her part, Anne was near laughing several times, and the looks she threw at Elizabeth had the effect of prompting Elizabeth's mirth. After all, it was much better to laugh than to react with anger, and as Elizabeth had often said, she dearly loved to laugh.

There appeared to be little of which to concern herself, for while Lady Catherine's questions strayed into prying, she was unfailingly polite, and Elizabeth's relations gave a good account of themselves. From Mr. Gardiner's business, they spoke of his background, that of Mrs. Gardiner, and several other subjects besides. The Gardiners proved their amiable natures by speaking with no hint of hesitation or any wish to hide anything, such that by the end of their discourse, Lady Catherine appeared satisfied. The lady could not, of course, allow such matters to rest there, for she was ever eager to ensure everyone else understood her sentiments.

"Well, I dare say you are as impressive a tradesman as I have ever known."

Anne put her fist into her mouth to keep from laughing, while Mr. Darcy shook his head and scowled at his aunt. Mr. Gardiner, however, smiled and nodded.

"Thank you, Lady Catherine," said Mr. Gardiner to her backhanded comment. "I have never seen the benefit of pretending that I am anything other than I am, for I am not ashamed of my profession."

"No, it is clear you are not," said the lady, giving no hint of whether she thought he should be . "Tell me, do you suppose you will strive to purchase an estate when you possess the means?"

Mr. Gardiner looked to his wife, who nodded eagerly. "If it is possible, we will do so, Lady Catherine. As I consider Derbyshire and this neighborhood to be the dearest place in the world, to live here would be all that I ever wished."

"I know of no estates for purchase in the neighborhood," said Mr. Darcy, "but I should be happy to keep you abreast of anything that arises."

"Thank you, Darcy," said Mr. Gardiner. "At present, I believe my means are insufficient, but that may change in the future. My wife wishes to live in Derbyshire, and who among us does not do everything we can to make our wives happy?"

"I do not know the bliss of that statement yet, Mr. Gardiner," said Mr. Darcy, his eyes finding Elizabeth. "But I hope I shall soon."

"Excellent," said Lady Catherine. "Darcy has a friend, a Mr. Bingley, who has recently taken steps to join the landed. I urge you, Mr. Gardiner, to do everything you can to rise to the same position."

"I shall, Lady Catherine," said Mr. Gardiner, with nary a trace of a grin.

Thereafter, the lady became more agreeable, the Gardiners having satisfied her, and if she remained the proud noble Elizabeth had always known her to be, her behavior was not objectionable. In the ensuing days, the Gardiners were often away from Pemberley, visiting the scenes and people from Mrs. Gardiner's youth. Elizabeth accompanied them and the company visited various locations Mr. Darcy thought worth touring, but she remained at Pemberley more often in the company of Anne, Georgiana, Mary, and Mr. Darcy. It was a surprise to Elizabeth when her uncle soon came to his wife's way of thinking.

"You know, Darcy," said he one night after they had returned to the estate, "I believe my wife is completely correct. Derbyshire is as fine a county as I have ever seen. It will be some years before I can contemplate a purchase, but I think I shall be happy to retire here when the time comes."

"I think, sir, it is always beneficial to agree with one's wife," said Mr. Darcy. "As I am of the same opinion, I shall only say that I am happy to assist when the time comes."

The smug expression with which Lady Catherine regarded them was evident to them all. Yet they were all too happy to give it much notice.

Which left Elizabeth in her current predicament. To the prospect of living in such an exemplary home as Pemberley, she could add the potential future happiness of her dear aunt and uncle living close by, and the prospect of Mr. Bingley and Jane removing to the north, as he had suggested several times. Mr. Darcy confided to Elizabeth that Mr. Bingley had already asked for his assistance in finding an estate for purchase in Derbyshire. Elizabeth was inclined to forgive him for this blatant effort to add further appeal to his suit.

The question yet remained: did Elizabeth love Mr. Darcy? Could she accept his offer with confidence in her feelings? That he would propose again was without question in Elizabeth's mind, for the gentleman had made no secret of his continued affection and ardent admiration. Should she accept, Elizabeth knew she would never be unhappy in life with him, for she was by now convinced his feelings were true. Yet she had always thought it necessary to return her chosen partner's affection rather than basking in his and offering none of her own.

Elizabeth stopped walking as she came to the edge of Pemberley's cultivated lands, looking out over the fields of Pemberley one last time before she entered the gardens, and from thence made her way to the house. Pemberley was beautiful—there was no denying it. She could imagine a lifetime of walking these paths, of exploring every nook and cranny of the estate; she would have a willing partner in Mr. Darcy. The gentleman wished to show her everything and was desperate to share everything with her. How could she remain unaffected by such devotion?

The decision would come soon—this Elizabeth knew. They were to stay only three more days before they would return to Hertfordshire and this time the Darcy party would travel with them. Mr. Darcy would propose before they departed. The gentleman had been bursting at the seams for days now, his eagerness endearing, his devotion breathtaking. The question, however, remained stubbornly unanswered. Would she accept him?

With a sigh, Elizabeth turned toward the house, but before she had taken a step, she beheld Mr. Darcy in the distance, approaching her. His long strides made the ground between them insignificant, but even so, his gait was unhurried, for he appeared to be drinking in the sight of her. The typical intensity with which he regarded her set her heart to flutter at the thought of the naked feelings this man now so easily betrayed to her.

Then Elizabeth knew. To refuse a second offer from this man was nigh insanity, for as his wife, he would cherish Elizabeth all the days of her life. She loved him. There was nothing in the world preventing her from loving him, from sharing every day of their lives, creating a family and a home with him, from living in bliss all her days. Nothing was holding her back.

"I hope you enjoyed your walk, Miss Bennet," said Mr. Darcy as he strode up to her.

"Always, sir," said Elizabeth with a beaming smile. "This is the loveliest place I have ever seen. I am so fortunate to receive your invitation to see it."

Mr. Darcy quirked a brow. "Then you confess it is superior to Longbourn?"

Elizabeth laughed with abandon. "I have not yet seen Pemberley in the winter. Does it snow much? You know that I detest snow."

"The climate is not much different. There is a little more snow, and sometimes we get fearsome storms. But it is not much colder here."

"Then I shall declare that Pemberley is superior, if only for the summer beauty."

In a bit of daring, Elizabeth then said: "I hope, sir, that I will see it again. One cannot go a lifetime and see such perfection only once."

"There is a simple solution to that," said the gentleman. "If you will marry me, you may see it every day of your life."

"I accept," said Elizabeth with no hesitation. "I must say, Mr. Darcy, that proposal was far superior to your first."

Mr. Darcy laughed. "It was not a proposal, though I shall not refuse to acknowledge your acceptance."

"But it was simple, and I am simply a country girl."

"Then we shall stay forever in the country," said the gentleman. "Now, there is a matter of important business to which I must attend."

So saying, the gentleman leaned down and captured her lips with his. The conviction that she had made the right decision swelled in Elizabeth's heart, and she wrapped her arms around his neck, pouring her love into the kiss. If she had her way, Elizabeth would never let go.

The End