11. Alexis

11

Kissing Damian is electrifying.

My whole body is on fire, my lips molding perfectly to his. The kiss starts off soft and exploratory, but it doesn't stay so for long. The unleashed hunger and passion I had been trying to suppress for Damian comes roaring back.

I kiss him harder, desperately, like I might drown if I don't consume every bit of him. My fingers tangle in his hair, pulling him even closer until there is no more space left between us. Damian matches my fervor, one arm snaking around my waist to pin my body to his.

He feels so powerful, so unrestrained, and yet his other hand strokes my cheek with the utmost delicacy. He is clearly the one in control, and honestly, that only makes me want him even more.

Mark's kisses never made me feel this way, this dizzying loss of control mixed with a sense of utter safety and security. Mark's kisses were hard and unyielding. He never took my feelings and wishes into account.

Damian's kiss alone is enough to upend my entire world while also grounding me. All I know at this moment is the white-hot desire searing through every fiber of my being.

The hand that is on my hip slides down to grip my ass, pulling me even tighter against the unmistakable bulge in his pants. A high-pitched whimper escapes my throat as I shamelessly grind myself against him, unleashing the building desperation between my legs.

"Damian…" I moan breathlessly against his searing kiss. His name on my lips only seems to spur him on further. One hand buries itself in my hair, angling my mouth for even deeper exploration. His other hand moves up from my ass to palm my breast. I gasp at the white-hot pleasure sparking through me.

This is really happening.

I want him more than I ever could have imagined, consequences be damned. I don't care that he's the Don of the Iacopelli Family. I don't care that he won't let me leave his house without his express permission. He's doing it for my own safety.

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I match his fervor with equal desperation, pouring every last bit of desire into this kiss.

When we finally break apart, I am utterly disheveled and panting harshly, our painting exercise completely forgotten. Damian's dark eyes smolder with undisguised lust as he takes in my flushed, wanting form.

I lean woozily against him. "Yes," I whisper.

"Yes?" he asks.

I nod. "I want you. Take me."

Damian's eyes burn with desire as I boldly confess my want for him. A low, guttural growl rumbles from his chest as he swiftly sweeps me up in his powerful arms, cradling me against his rock-solid frame.

"You have no idea what you do to me," he rasps huskily against my parted lips before claiming them in a scorching, possessive kiss.

I melt into his embrace, whimpering softly as his skilled tongue strokes against my own. The world seems to fall away, my senses utterly overwhelmed by the taste, scent, and feel of this commanding man.

We make it only a few steps before Damian pins me against the nearest wall, his toned body aligned with mine from chest to hip. I gasp at the sudden impact but then sigh wantonly as his mouth begins trailing molten kisses along my jaw and neck.

"Damian…" I breathe against his neck like a prayer, tangling my fingers into his thick locks to hold him impossibly closer.

He responds by sucking at the sensitive juncture between my neck and shoulder, coaxing a trembling moan from my lips. I can feel his arousal straining against me, sending a fresh surge of dizzying desire searing through my veins.

Just as I think I might pass out from the tension, Damian abruptly lifts me again and carries me up the sweeping staircase to his bedroom. He alternates between searing kisses and whispering filthy praises against my flushed skin that have me squirming shamelessly in his arms.

By the time we reach his bedroom door, I feel utterly delirious with longing. Damian captures my mouth once more in a molten, languid kiss that has me whimpering and arching against his frame. When we finally part, his eyes smolder with undisguised hunger.

"I'm going to make you mine in every way possible," he vows in a rugged tone that resonates straight to my core. "Every beautiful inch of you."

When he lays me on his bed, the reality of the situation finally sets in. I feel a sudden wave of nerves wash over me. This will be my first time, while Damian is clearly experienced and has probably been with countless women before.

Sensing my apprehension, Damian cups my face, forcing me to look into his piercing gaze. "What's wrong?"

I avert my eyes. "It's just… I'm new to this. What if I'm terrible?" I chew my bottom lip nervously, fighting back tears.

Damian lets out a low chuckle and shakes his head. He places a trail of featherlight kisses along my sensitive skin. "Don't even think like that."

He tips my chin up again to meet his smoldering stare. "This isn't about comparing you to others. With you, everything is new, exciting…" His voice drops even lower. "Utterly consuming me in a way I've never experienced before."

I feel my fears slowly ebb away as Damian's words and scorching caresses surround me. He cradles my face, leaning in to rest his forehead against mine. "I want to worship every inch of you, Alexis. Savor this moment and make it ours."

I gaze up at him, giving myself over to the tenderness simmering beneath his passionate intensity. He's right—this is our experience, unlike anything we've ever known before.

With a soft smile, I reach up to pull him into a kiss, ready to fully surrender myself to this man.

His hands slowly trace the curve of my body as our kisses deepen and intensify. My breath comes in shaky pants, desire swirling within me. Mark had never seen me this undressed, let alone touched me so intimately. The most I had ever let him do is touch a breast over my bra.

Sensing my trepidation, Damian pulls back just enough to catch my gaze. "Just breathe, Alexis," he murmurs huskily. "We'll go at your pace."

He presses a searing trail of kisses along my jawline and neck, fingers lightly tracing the hem of my shirt. "May I?" The gravelly request vibrates against my flushed skin, pulling a shuddering inhale from my lips.

Giving the smallest of nods, I lift my arms to allow Damian to undress me. He slides the shirt up tantalizingly slowly, caressing every new inch of exposed skin. I can't help the moan that escapes as his gaze rakes over my bare torso.

Any lingering shyness evaporates beneath the heated intensity of Damian's eyes. This is a man thoroughly worshiping and savoring every detail of my body as if I am the most precious work of art.

"Perfection," he rasps in a tone thick with want before claiming my lips once more.

Emboldened, I allow my hands to roam the hard planes of his chest, feeling the taut muscles quivering beneath my touch. I tug insistently at the fabric separating us until he pulls back just long enough to tear it off in one heated motion.

My breath catches in my throat as Damian's chiseled torso is finally revealed to me. He is undeniably the most strikingly handsome man I have ever laid eyes on. His physique is sculpted to perfection—toned and powerful.

However, as my gaze rakes over his bronzed skin, I notice the faint lines of scars marring his otherwise flawless form. Some are thin and faded with age, while others look more recent and jagged. They crisscross his abdomen and chest, reminders of the dangerous world he inhabits.

The dangerous world I now inhabit.

He presses our bodies flush together, searing skin against searing skin. The new, intimate contact draws matching gasps of pleasure from our lips. His skilled fingers quickly unclasp my bra with ease as he pauses, a hungry smile on his face.

Damian lowers his head, taking my nipple into his mouth, his tongue lavishing the puckered bud.

"God, you're beautiful," he murmurs, kissing at the fullness of my breast before returning to my nipple.

My hands bury in his thick hair as my back arches, loving the feeling of his mouth on me. His other hand freely plays with my other breast, massaging and flicking the nipple before returning his attention to it with his mouth.

After a few moments, he pulls away and a cold chill runs through me as the air hits my wet, lonely buds. His hands slide down my waist, thumbs hooking on the waistband of my leggings and underwear before pulling them down in one quick, smooth motion.

"Fucking beautiful," he mutters, pressing his lips to my stomach before trailing down my torso to my hips, then my thighs.

He leaves kisses everywhere, and I can't catch my breath.

My brain no longer works as his lips dance around the sensitive skin of my inner thighs, moving closer and closer to my heated core. A hard gasp falls from my mouth as his tongue separates my folds, caressing the engorged, sensitive nub hidden between them.

I can't believe this is happening. Not because it's my first time, but because of how much I want Damian. It feels incredible. Amazing.

I am full of nerves, but not in the self-conscious way I anticipated. I want him, but I can't quite understand the heaviness of my desire. He's gentle but still in control, and I love it.

My grip tightens on his hair as he continues to lick and suck, pushing me closer and closer to the edge.

"Damian!" I pant, closing my eyes and lifting my hips.

He wraps my legs around his head, gripping my thighs as he continues his assault on me. A deep, low moan rolls in my throat and pours out my mouth as my body begins to tremble and shake, just mere seconds away from climax.

But then he stops.

I gasp at the sudden cool breeze hitting me. My eyes fly open as I make a weak, pitiful moan.

"Not yet," he says simply.

I watch as he loosens his belt, undoing the button of his pants and pulling his massive, thick cock out.

My eyes widen at its size, and I hesitate, unsure whether all of it will even fit. As if reading my mind, he chuckles.

"It will fit perfectly fine. Don't you worry."

He leans over me, pressing his cock against the inside of my thigh as he pushes two fingers into my dripping core.

I let out a gasp as a sharp pain courses through me.

His fingers still. "Are you okay?"

I nod, the sharp pain slowly going away. "Yeah, just—a little slower, please."

He acquiesces, pumping his fingers in and out, hooking them upward to stroke my G-spot.

I struggle to take in deeper breaths and hold on to his shoulders as he steadily pumps in and out of me. My nails dig into his shoulders as he pumps harder, faster. His thumb swirls and caresses my clit.

"Oh! Fuck! Damian!"

I moan and lift my hips up, allowing him to go deeper, begging him to go faster. Another moan rolls from my lips, and he growls in response.

"Goddamn it," he mutters, pulling his fingers out. But before I can even make any sort of noise of complaint, I feel his head push into my entrance.

We both cry out as he pushes further into me. The slickness of my pussy makes the act a lot easier.

He grips the mattress as he finally bottoms out, and I lift my hips, biting my lip at the slight pain of his stretching me.

Damian begins at a slow pace. His hands pull my legs around his waist, allowing him to lean further and deeper into me before gripping the mattress again. A low, sensual groan escapes him as he picks up pace. My head slams against the bed with each powerful thrust.

"Ah, fuck!" he groans as he grips the mattress tighter.

I close my eyes, letting out a small scream as his thumb finds its way back to my clit.

He brings my legs up suddenly, pushing them closer to me as he pushes in deeper.

"FUCK YES! DAMIAN!"

The steady sounds of smacking, panting, groans, and moans fill the room.

He splits my legs to lean down, burying his face momentarily in the crook of my neck.

"That's it. Fuck, that's it," he moans against me. "Fuck, you feel so good."

I dig my nails into his back as Damian plants soft, tender kisses along my throat and cheek. That, along with the hard and heavy thrusts into me, feels so good.

Our lips latch together, our tongues tangling and fighting for dominance. His pace grows more erratic the closer he gets. The knot that's been growing in my stomach tightens with each and every thrust until finally, my walls clench tightly around him.

He is pushing me toward a cliff, and as I approach the expanse, I jump, exploding in an ecstasy that ripples through my entire body. When I cry out his name, my voice sounds different. Invigorated. Powerful.

And I love every moment of it.

His pace grows unsteady. The bed groans in protest of his grip. "God! Fuck!" he moans and pulls out quickly, stroking himself hard and fast, until finally, he comes on my stomach as he throws his head back and moans. His hand pumps his cock slowly.

He leans over me, panting. Our exhales intermingle with one another. He rests his sweaty forehead against mine, causing our lips to be inches apart.

My hands reach up to grab his face, pulling him down for another kiss that he allows, and for the first time in a long time, I feel wanted.

My thoughts are swirling in the aftermath of my first sexual experience. The rush of emotions is overwhelming. I can't believe it. I finally had sex, and it was even more amazing than I had ever dared to imagine.

The sensations, the connection, the sheer ecstasy of the moment surpassed all of my expectations. I'm grateful I waited and didn't have sex with Mark. I find I'm grateful Damian was my first.

Despite my initial apprehension and the lingering sense of fear I feel toward Damian, I can't deny the undeniable truth. He made the experience incredibly pleasurable. The intensity of his presence, the passion in his touch, and the way he guided me through every moment leaves me breathless in the best possible way.

I snuggle up close to Damian, resting my head on his chest, wanting to revel in post-sex cuddles. Suddenly, Damian goes rigid beside me. With a jerk, he abruptly breaks my embrace and swings his legs over the side of the bed. I lay there, stunned by his reaction.

"Damian?" I ask meekly as he stands, not looking at me, and grabs his clothes. He doesn't respond, roughly pulling on his pants and slipping on his shirt. I watch his movements, filled with confusion. Have I done something wrong? Did I overstep some unspoken boundary?

"I have business to attend to," Damian states flatly, still not meeting my eyes. He marches toward the bedroom door.

"But I… I thought…" I stammer, rejection swirling within me. This man, the powerful Iacopelli Don who strikes fear into rivals, is pulling away from my simple attempt at intimacy.

Damian pauses at the door, his hand on the knob, and half-turns toward me. For just a moment, I see a fleeting glimpse of vulnerability behind his steel gaze before the wall goes back up.

"Not tonight," he says, his voice low but firm. "Close the door after you get dressed." Then he's gone, leaving me alone in the rumpled sheets.

As the door clicks shut, I'm left struggling to understand what just happened. Why had a simple cuddle been so unwelcome? Tears well up in my eyes, and I bring my knees to my chest, wrapping my arms around them as sobs start to rack my body.

"What's wrong with me?" I whisper to no one. No matter how much I bend and mold myself to be acceptable, it's never enough.

Except for my mother, the one person in my life who loved me unconditionally—flaws and all—until she was taken from me. My mother's warmth and acceptance kept me from feeling unlovable.

As my body shakes with sobs, I feel an aching loneliness fill my very core. With no family, no true love, I am adrift with the resounding belief that some inherent flaw lying deep within me prevents anyone from ever fully loving me.

In that darkness, the spark of self-worth my mother had kindled feels like it is calling out its last feeble, flickering gasp. Each emotional abandonment presses in, leaving me feeling more unlovable than ever before.