Chapter 39

39

FIA

“ I don’t understand,” I said as Colin tugged me onto the subway. His face was still red from the absolute reaming he got from Dad about half an hour ago when he finally showed up at the house again, having missed not only our traditional Christmas pancakes, but opening presents. I clutched my new camera in the sleek leather bag I’d opened this morning, a gift that went with it, and found a seat near the doors. Colin stood, gripping the pole in front of me as the train jerked into movement. “What exactly happened last night?”

“I came to my senses and now me and Mason are dueling over you like gentlemen.”

“That’s the dumbest thing that’s ever come out of your mouth.”

He smirked, dressed in his usual wool coat and finance bro attire. He looked like hell, though, with dark circles under his eyes and a five o’clock shadow that he scratched in the crowded subway car. “Look, I met up with Mason last night and we talked it out.”

“And?” I asked impatiently.

“He’s gonna make it up to you.”

“Mason’s not a grand gestures kind of guy. Plus, that’s not what I need. I just want to talk to him since you pretty much ruined my life last night.”

He motioned to the camera bag. “You’re not as mad at me as you could have been, huh?”

His cheesy smirk burrowed into my brain, and I flushed, clutching the new camera a little tighter. “Getting me the camera I wanted doesn’t mean you’re forgiven.”

“You’re going to have a good time, trust me.” He scanned the subway car for a moment.

I tapped my nails on the plastic seat, going over the last twelve hours in my head. My chest still ached from my heart shattering to pieces but I’d managed to sleep and eat, which meant my brain was in working order, at least.

“You’re not really dueling over me, are you?”

“Nah, I don’t have time for that. Maybe later. I’m catching a movie with someone before going back to Mom and Dad’s house for dinner.”

Yeah, so was I, but I wasn’t planning on seeing a movie today. “With who? Liv, by chance?”

“I’m hoping the girl I’m taking to the movies today gets Liv out of my head, if I’m being totally honest.”

I raised my brows. Colin caught the look on my face and rolled his eyes. “I’ve had a bit of a crush on her for a while. She’s cool, smart, funny. I like her little bookshop.”

“Her little bookshop?”

“You know the one.”

“It’s the way you said it.” I chuckled, rolling my eyes. “Has anything happened between you two?”

“Isn’t that my business?”

“Well, after what you did last night, you don’t get to draw boundaries like that,” I said.

“I went to her shop a few weeks ago for a totally innocent reason, okay? I was looking for a book for Mom, a cookbook, to give to her for Christmas. You know that chef on TV she likes? His book. Anyway, I saw Liv there, and it had been some time since I’d seen her, and we got to talking and I just felt like I wanted to keep talking to her.” He shrugged, trying to hide the emotions playing behind his eyes by scowling at an empty chair a few feet away from us. “I asked for her number and she laughed at me, which made the feeling worse. So I’ve been dropping in and she finally agreed to get some coffee sometime.”

“You don’t ever do coffee dates.”

“Well, now I do. We’ve been on three.”

I gaped at him. “Three dates with my best friend? You sneaky little shits.”

“I don’t think she considers them dates.” He looked almost disappointed.

“Why not ask her to the movies instead of bringing some rando you found on a hookup app?”

He shook his head. “Because I feel like Liv could be it for me and I’m not sure if I’m ready for that.”

The words hit me hard. What an admission! My brother falling in love with my best friend?

I didn’t have time to press him further. He hauled me out of the subway car and through Grand Central Station, which was buzzing with activity and more crowded than I’d ever seen it before. Carolers sang Christmas songs that drifted above the noise as we walked out onto the dreary street. It was still snowing. In fact, Dad had spent a good hour this morning standing in front of the TV with his hands on hips, watching reports of a winter storm warning blare in all red across the screen.

Dressed in one of Mom’s fancy wool coats and a beige winter hat, I trudged behind Colin as he purposefully led me to Central Park, busting a path with his boots.

We reached the lake and skirted around it, neither of us speaking until the path became familiar, a memory from not too long ago fizzing to life. The hill where those kids had thrown snowballs at me and Mason came into view. The park was empty, though. Barely anyone was out enjoying the snow.

It was Christmas day, after all. Everyone was home with their families right then—everyone except Mason.

He rose from the bench where we shared that kiss that changed everything. He was dressed impeccably, his hair brushed back away from his face with a freshly shaven jaw. He was wearing a suit under his jacket as he faced me, and Colin stepped up to him, grabbing his arm and leaning in to say something in his ear before clapping him on the shoulder and walking away, out of sight.

I stood in the center of the pathway, unsure of what to say or do. Mason stared at me for a moment before dropping his gaze and walking over, only lifting his eyes to mine again when he was less than a foot away.

“I messed up.”

“Yeah, you did.” I bit down on the tip of my tongue to try to stop myself from saying anything I would come to regret.

“I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t mean much. I just need you to know that I am sorry for walking away last night, for ruining your Christmas.”

I huffed a breath. “It was Colin’s fault.”

“Not entirely. I should have told him the same thing that I should have told you.”

My stomach sank into my boots. “Told me what?”

“That I love you.”

The words hit me in the chest and bloomed into hope. “You love me?”

“I’ve loved you since you walked in the door of my restaurant, skirting the rules I laid out for you when you agreed to this scheme, Fia. God, I loved you then. I didn’t realize it for a while. When I did, that’s all I could think about. How I wish we could go back to that night and do it the right way, from the beginning. And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”

I chewed on my lower lip. “You love me?”

“I’m in love with you, yes. I can’t stand here and pretend like I’ve ever been a man of many words but I know this for certain—” He licked his lips, looking down at his hands as he reached for me. “Being around you feels like I’ve been missing something and finally found it. Like there was a piece of me walking around the city that I’d been searching for and completed me when I saw you for the first time. You are everything to me. You saw me when no one else did. You never saw me as just another rich idiot in a suit. You saw me, and that felt like I’d come home. Every time we’re together, I feel like I’m home, and I don’t want to be without you again.”

Tears flooded my eyes. He reached up, dragging his thumbs over my cheeks to wipe them away.

“I should be groveling on my knees for you to forgive me for the way I acted when I found out about your job opportunity in California, Fia, I’m sorry.”

I clutched his wrists, leaning into his touch. “I wasn’t going to take it.”

“Why not? You would be perfect.”

“There wasn’t a question in my mind about where I was meant to be.” I looked into his eyes. He understood. I could tell as he looked down at me, taking a deep breath. “I wanted to be here with you. You’re the only thing that makes sense to me right now. Everything else is just noise.”

“If you change your mind, I’ll go with you to California. We’d make it work.”

“That’s not necessary,” I said. “I have an idea for my own business. I can’t do it in LA. Plus, everything I love is here. You’re here.”

His throat worked as he swallowed, his eyes searching mine.

“I love you, too,” I said.

His lips slammed into mine in a desperate, heated kiss that had my toes curling in my boots. I closed my eyes and leaned into it, wrapping my arms around his neck as he lifted me off the ground. I was sure I was about to start blubbering. I could feel the Christmas magic seeping back into my wounded heart as he knitted it back together again.

“Tell me about your morning,” he said as he let me down and laced his fingers in mine. We sat at a nearby bench and watched the snow fall as I told him about breakfast, and opening presents, and finding the letter, and opening it…

“What did you get for Christmas?” I asked.

“I haven’t been back to my parents’ apartment yet,” he admitted.

“I have a gift for you back at my parents’ house,” I said with a touch of regret. “It’s nothing big but it made me think of you.”

He nodded, but he looked down at his shoes, his eyes lost in thought for a moment. “I have something for you too. A few things, actually, but this is the most important one.”

My body locked up in surprise as he stood up and walked a few paces away. I rose, feeling strange about the way he was moving. I’d never seen him this nervous before.

“Are you all right?” I asked, my voice gravelly as he turned around with his hands in his pockets.

“Nothing would change if you’re not ready,” he said. “It wouldn’t change a thing.”

“What wouldn’t?”

Mason O’Leary got down on one knee in the snow, the white-washed trees and the frost-covered fountain rising behind him. He was sharply contrasted against the gray light and white backdrop as he pulled a light blue ring box out of his pocket. His eyes locked on mine and were full of hope, full of love. “Fia.”

My lips parted as he opened the ring box, revealing a startlingly beautiful emerald surrounded by perfect diamonds. “But it’s not New Year’s.”

He laughed a bit nervously and shook his head. “Proposing to you on New Year’s would have wasted your favorite holiday, remember?”

He’d said that to me before. It was the moment I knew, in my soul, that I felt something deep for him, and had to bargain with my own feelings from thereafter.

“I want you to be my wife. I want to wake up next to you every morning. I want to spend every holiday together, even the boring ones. I want to watch our children open presents on Christmas morning a few years from now and look back on this moment knowing I was making the best decision I’d ever made in my life, because I love you, Fia Webster. Will you marry me?”

It took several seconds for my heart to start beating again.

When it did, I rushed into his arms, tackling him into the snow. “Yes! Oh, my God, yes!”