Library

Chapter 13

“Just to beclear and to make sure I understand the current parameters of our friendship,” Rosie said as she put her car in park and turned off the engine, “I’m not allowed to set you up because you’re working through your baggage. And that’s going to take as long as it takes, but you’re allowed to introduce me to women you think I might like.” She turned in her seat and faced Lori. “Do I have that about right?”

“You have it exactly right.” Lori gave Rosie a sweet smile and stepped out to wait for her. “Did you have to take a spot so far away from the elevators?”

Rosie hooked her arm through Lori’s as they began the trek toward the elevators. “I told you: I’m minimizing the potential damage to my paintwork by parking far from the madding crowd.”

“I wish you told me before I chose these shoes.”

Rosie whistled. “They are killer heels, and they look spectacular. Your TikTok followers will love them, I’m sure.”

“That’s the idea. I’m happy to exploit any angle if it means I can attract more donations.” That hadn’t been the reason for her choice in footwear, of course. She wanted to feel confident when she saw Gabe again, and heels did that for her. They also made her feel sexy, which was something she hadn’t even thought about wanting to feel for a long time. “But anyway, you don’t have to worry about your car now that your best friend has connections. I hear Hannah is a whizz with a spray can.”

“This is the very first time I’ve been able to afford to buy a car that no one has ever sat in, or spilled coffee on the dash, or flicked a bitten-off nail into the backseat. I don’t want anyone with halitosis in this ride, so I really don’t want someone to ding the door yet. And you said that Hannah was married too, so she’s not going to give me any preferential treatment, is she?”

Lori shook her head. “You wouldn’t have been interested even if she wasn’t married to a—” Nope, she couldn’t quite bring herself to say that word in a good way anymore. “If she wasn’t married to a woman she’s just had triplets with. Trust me when I say that Hannah is definitely not your type. And you have to let your Toni fantasy go, because she’s busy living her happily ever after with her own soldier girl. I’m doing you a favor, like the good friend I am.”

Rosie hit the button on the wall of a bank of elevators. “I’m not sure there really are any happily ever after stories. Everyone around me is either miserable and single or miserable and married. I thought you were the exception.”

They stepped into an empty elevator, and Lori leaned back against the mirrored interior. “You’re not the only one who thought that. But don’t give up. A new love could be just around the corner.”

“Which brings you nicely to the woman I’m about to meet by accident,” Rosie said.

“Exactly. Her name is Shanae, but her civilian friends call her Shay.” Lori waved her hands in the air as if Shay’s name were up in lights.

“Mm.” Rosie looked up into the same space. “That’s a good start. I can hear myself calling out her name in the throes of passion.”

Lori scoffed. “Pillow queen.”

“It’s just my fingers I can’t use, Lori. I have plenty of other methods to please my partner.” Rosie extended her hands to display her perfectly manicured nails.

Lori admired them. Each nail was a deep, almost-black, maroon and every alternate nail was adorned with a delicately painted rose. “They’re exquisite.” Lori clasped her hands together to hide her own nails, which were desperately dull in comparison.

“When was the last time you treated your nails to some love?” Rosie asked.

“The trouble with someone knowing me so well is that I can barely do anything without my words or actions being interpreted.”

“And the good thing about someone knowing you so well is that you can barely do anything without someone caring about it,” Rosie said and smiled gently.

“That is a good thing, and I’m grateful for you.” She pulled Rosie into a hug.

The elevator reached the ground floor, and they exited directly onto the street.

Rosie stopped and held Lori at arm’s length, looking at her with a serious expression. “When we’re done here, we’re heading to the closest nail salon. My treat.”

Lori hooked her arm into Rosie’s again and headed toward Gabe’s garage. “That’s not necessary. It’s not that I can’t afford it, it’s more that I haven’t wanted to get them done.”

“Don’t you think I know that? But if I want to treat my bestie to a manicure, I think I should be allowed. Especially if you’re about to introduce me to my soulmate.”

“Okay, let’s do it.” She’d always liked having her nails polished and neat, and it was another thing that she’d neglected over the past year.

Rosie glanced at Lori briefly, and it was clear that she wanted to say something else but wasn’t quite sure if she should.

“Go ahead,” Lori said.

Rosie laughed. “Premonition: another good thing about us knowing each other so well,” she said. “I hope I’m allowed to say that it’s good to see you in heels and being okay with me dragging you to have your nails done. It’s progress, isn’t it?”

“I’d like to think it is, yes.” Lori pointed toward Bonnie’s Brew just ahead of Gabe’s auto shop. “Do you want a caffeine fix? I think I need one before I go on-screen.”

Rosie’s sideways glance made it clear she wasn’t fooled by the feeble excuse. Lori had been neglecting their friendship as much as she’d been neglecting herself, and it was time to change that too. Spending a few extra moments alone with Rosie would be good.

Lori snagged a couple of high barstools by the window while Rosie went to place their order. She also wanted a little bathroom pitstop to fix her makeup and prepare herself to see Gabe again. It had only been a day since Gabe had picked up the car, and although Lori was glad for it to be gone, she was also grateful for the ongoing excuse to see Gabe more regularly than her weekly Max visit.

Rosie returned quickly with their matching lattes and scooted onto the seat beside her. “This is starting to feel like old times.”

Lori caught the hint of melancholy in Rosie’s voice, and guilt tugged firmly on her conscience. She placed her hand over Rosie’s and squeezed. “I’m sorry I disappeared on you.”

“Hey, no, you don’t have to apologize,” Rosie said. “You did what you had to do, and I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you.”

Lori sighed deeply. “Still, I froze you out, and you stuck around. Thank you for that.”

“It’s what friends do. How many times have you been there to pick up the pieces with me?”

Lori began to count. “I don’t have enough fingers,” she said and laughed.

“Point made. My love life has been a total mess the whole time we’ve known each other, and there’s no sign of an uptick in my future, so I wasn’t about to duck out on you when you needed me.” Rosie shrugged then winked. “Besides, it’s only a matter of time before I’ll need you to dig me out of another emotional black hole.”

“That’s not the kind of positive thinking I know and love you for.”

Rosie sipped her coffee then dabbed at her resulting foam mustache with a napkin. “Which is why I need you and why I stuck around.” She gestured toward Lori’s tall glass mug. “Anyway, you’ve got your caffeine fix, so why don’t you tell me why we really stopped here?”

“To continue my metaphor, I guess that I’m finally beginning to melt the ice walls I constructed after the lawyer left.”

“Okay, that’s good, and I’m relieved to hear it,” Rosie said. “But you seem to have shifted into a higher gear than you’ve been in for over a year. Want to share what’s kickstarted that?”

“I do,” Lori said. “You already know about Gabe and Max.”

Rosie grinned and wiggled her eyebrows. “Of course I do. She was super-hot in that overtly strong way you’re a big fan of, and she helped raise a chunk of cash for the Sanctuary. I may have been a little out of it because I was chucking my guts up, but I wasn’t about to forget that.”

Lori clasped her hand over her mouth in a futile effort to stop a giggle emerging. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t laugh.”

“No. You shouldn’t,” Rosie said then laughed herself. “But I’ll let you if you continue the story.”

“Okay. And you know about the lawyer’s workshop and the car she never fixed?”

Rosie harrumphed so loudly that an old couple at a nearby table looked their way, distinctly unimpressed. “I remember how much money she spent on getting ready to fix it too.”

“All of it wasted,” she said. That had been an issue because they had shared finances, and Lori had never been a spendthrift, while the lawyer let money slip through her fingers like water. Lori didn’t get a large salary from the Sanctuary, but the lawyer still managed to blow through that as well as her own salary. She had to admit to liking Rosie’s indignation, but just as she hadn’t told her therapist about where exactly she’d found the lawyer and her clerk, she’d neglected to give that detail to Rosie too. There were some things she just didn’t want to share… She ignored the voice that chided her for sharing with Gabe and not her best friend, justifying it as the quid pro quo they’d agreed on.

“I get all that,” Rosie said. “And it’s led to Gabe’s offer to fix up the car, which is why we’re here. Are you saying that Gabe is the catalyst for the sudden change in pace of your healing?”

“It’s all inextricably linked.” Lori took a moment to have a long drink of her latte before it cooled too much. “Gabe’s second visit set off a chain of events that prompted me to address what’s probably the final piece of my life with the lawyer.”

“The car,” Rosie said, nodding. “When the car is sold for auction, it will close the book for you.”

“That’s a big part of it, yes. And so is my friendship with Gabe.”

Rosie wrinkled her nose. “Just a friendship?”

“Yes. For now. I’ve come to realize that I dived in too soon with the lawyer. We had an instant attraction, and we based a whole relationship on it. But after the sex faded, which wasn’t long after we’d gotten married, we didn’t have all that much to talk about, and we had no common interests.”

“Lesbian bed death. It’s a curse.”

Lori shrugged. “I don’t think it was that. Sex has just never been that important to me.”

“Really?” Rosie looked baffled.

“Really. It’s not that big a thing for more people than you might think,” Lori said. “The problem was, without a lot of sex, which was a big thing for the lawyer, there was nothing to keep us together.”

“It sounds like you’re taking the blame for her cheating on you.”

Lori shook her head. “No, I’m definitely not saying that. She should’ve told me that she wasn’t happy, and we could’ve separated without all the acrimony of infidelity.”

“Or you could’ve stayed together and agreed to have an open relationship.”

“I’ve thought about that, but I know now that I wasn’t getting anything from the marriage. She didn’t support me, she wasn’t interested in what I was doing at work or in my limited spare time, and we had no shared hobbies. If any of that had been different, I might’ve considered the option of her sleeping with other people.”

“I couldn’t do that,” Rosie said. “I couldn’t share someone. I want to be all things to one person and for that person to be all things to me. Maybe that’s why I’m still single; maybe I’ve got unrealistic expectations.”

“No, I don’t think so. To be honest, I’m not sure why you’re single, but it’s not because of your expectations, which you’re entitled to and should stick to. I think all relationships are different, and people have to find the right balance for themselves. And that’s easy to say and hard to achieve.” She used a spoon to push the foam down the glass and into the last half of her coffee before she stirred it. “But you should stick to your standards and keep looking.”

“So you’re saying you have new standards now, and Gabe isn’t anywhere near them?”

Lori shook her head, perhaps a little too vehemently. “I’m saying it’s different with Gabe. I want to build a friendship and find out what common interests we’ve got.”

“But you’re attracted to her, aren’t you?”

Lori pictured Gabe getting out of her truck the first time they’d met, and she blew out a long breath. “Like a north to south pole magnet.”

“The same way you were attracted to the lawyer?” Rosie asked.

She thought about that for a second longer than she’d needed to, because the answer in her head had been instantaneous. “Gabe is like a neodymium magnet. The lawyer’s was ferrite.”

“I have no idea what that means or how you do. Is that a no?”

“Neodymium magnets are up to seven times stronger than ferrite, so no, it’s not the same level of attraction at all. I had to do some research for the strongest magnets for doors to our elephant enclosures in Koh Samui.”

“Ah, of course, and you can’t forget it.”

Lori shrugged. “Even if I wanted to. And I can tell you I was an eight-year-old using screechy dial-up internet on a Power Mac G4 500 cube, eating imported Cap’n Crunch’s peanut butter cereal.”

“God, I remember that stuff. It was like eating caramelized razor-blade sugar.”

“Yep. It ripped the roof of your mouth off, didn’t it?” Lori laughed at the memory, grateful that it was one of the good ones given the subject of their conversation. “But it was so addictive, like the cereal version of cocaine. I used to eat it dry by the handful.”

“Ha! Me too! And that weird film it left on your teeth… Jeez, I have no idea why I ate it.”

“It was my mom and dad’s one concession to junk food.”

Rosie shook her head and motioned to the huge clock on the wall. “We’re going to be late if you don’t get back on topic.”

“Right. Gabe. I was saying that I want to build strong foundations of a friendship with her, slowly, and if that works out, and I’m still attracted to her too, then I’ll see what the future holds.”

“What if that takes so long that Gabe has been snapped up by someone else?”

“Then I’ll wait, or I’ll move on.” Lori swallowed the last of her coffee and smiled inwardly. If she didn’t put pressure on her friendship with Gabe, it would be so much easier and so much more enjoyable to get to know her. “The process I’ve got to go through to get to the other side of this is for myself, not for someone else. Gabe can’t be the light at the end of the tunnel. That light has to be finding myself again, discovering what I really want from a relationship. If Gabe’s not still around, or if she’s with someone else, then we aren’t meant to be. And maybe things will change later. But I’ve spent seven years of my life trying to make someone else happy when they didn’t even want to be with me. I won’t do that again. I need to know that there’s more than just a physical attraction that will fade as my boobs sag, my skin wrinkles, and my Buddha belly gets bigger.”

Rosie got up from her stool, wrapped her arms around Lori, and hugged her so tight that it almost constricted her breathing.

“I’ve missed you. I’ve missed this so much.”

“I’ve missed you too, babe.”

Rosie let her go and hopped back up on her chair to finish her coffee. “Okay, now that we’re back on track, I think you were just about to describe Shay-Shanae in detail.”

Lori laughed and shook her head. “It’s just Shay. She didn’t tell me her last name, and I don’t think her Army moniker is any help in that department.”

“Which is what?”

“Lightning. She said that was a story for another time, and she touched her shoulder, but I don’t know if that was significant or she just had an itch.”

“Mm. Could be that lightning only strikes once, meaning she only has one-night stands.”

Lori frowned. “That’s what you get from that nickname? Not that she might be a fast runner, or that she was super-fast at fixing tanks in the field?”

“You know me: the first place my mind goes is sex,” Rosie said. “So maybe you’re not introducing me to the love of my life but to the best sex of my life. Either way, I’m still taking you to have that manicure when we’re done, okay?”

“Okay.” Lori got up and gathered her purse. “I need a few minutes in the ladies’ room to make sure I’m camera-ready, and then we can go.”

Rosie grinned. “Of course. All for the camera.”

Lori didn’t respond to Rosie’s implication, even though she was exactly right, and headed to the restroom bouncing with a kind of newly found freedom in her step. Unlike Rosie, she’d released all expectations of a new relationship and was starting with a blank page…

A page she couldn’t wait to fill with her discovery of everything Gabe.

Comments

0 Comments
Best Newest

Contents
Settings
  • T
  • T
  • T
  • T
Font

Welcome to FullEpub

Create or log into your account to access terrific novels and protect your data

Don’t Have an account?
Click above to create an account.

lf you continue, you are agreeing to the
Terms Of Use and Privacy Policy.