Chapter Fourteen

ELLIS

I t's all I can do not to cross the kitchen and deck that asshole Hicks. Though he might be bigger and heavier, we're evenly matched in a fight. He relies on instinct in the ring, while I'm more methodical, using my speed and a few well-placed blows to destroy my opponent.

I inhale deeply, trying to dispel the rage thrumming in my veins, but it's like breathing fire. He's more than welcome to his suspicions, but his open hostility rubs me the wrong way. Rue has done nothing to deserve his open disrespect, not that Hicks needs an excuse to disrespect anyone.

He barely has the time of day for any woman outside of fucking them. I don't like that Rue is on his radar. There is something innocent about her, something untarnished, despite her horrific past, and damn if I'll allow any of us to take that from her.

I reach up to touch the cheek she kissed, then quickly lower my arm before Hicks notices the tell. I've been kissed plenty of times by many different women, often using a lot more seduction, but I've never reacted to any of them so viscerally.

Rue's innocent brush of lips against my cheek nearly destroyed me.

It's not just a physical reaction either, though my cock is still standing at attention, demanding I lay claim to her. My soul sings at her nearness, and my body is eager for more. While I'm not sure I like the loss of control, it's also exhilarating.

Desperate for a distraction, I push away my emotions, struggling with my anger for a moment, and concentrate on tending to Rue's injury. I tug her into the bathroom, slip my hands around her waist, and boost her onto the counter. Bending slightly, ready to search under the sink to retrieve the medical kit, I freeze when I catch a glimpse of her face.

Rue's gorgeous teal eyes are unfocused, her body unresponsive. Bile rises in my throat at the way she so completely vanished inside her head. Not wanting to startle her, I snap my fingers in front of her face.

No response, not even a flinch.

She's completely locked away in her mind, and I'm not sure how to bring her back. Often suffering from debilitating panic attacks myself, I've never felt so helpless in my life after seeing the vivacious Rue just vanish before my eyes.

Desperate to draw her back, unwilling to let her suffer alone, I grimace at what I'm about to do. Gut swirling with dread, I reach out with shaking fingers, wrap them directly over the fresh burn mark on her arm, and press down hard.

My heart breaks when she doesn't respond in any way.

She's so used to pain that she doesn't even shudder. I jerk away as if touching her has scorched me down to the bone. I'm barely able to stave off my own panic as I pace the small confines of the room.

Since pain didn't work, only one other solution comes to mind—pleasure.

I stop short right in front of her and slowly turn to face her. Stepping between her parted legs, I hesitantly cradle her face in my hands. I gently brush my thumbs along her cheekbones, marveling at the smooth texture of her alabaster skin.

While her nearness eases my anxiety slightly, my nerves ratchet up even more. Though I might like my women tied down and helpless when I bed them, they are always aware and consenting.

Never like this.

Never without permission.

Sucking in a shuddering breath, I slowly close the distance between us, the tightness in my chest increasing with every inch until nothing else exists but her. I don't close my eyes as I lightly brush my lips against hers, searching for the slightest reaction.

With a sinking gut, I increase the pressure, my hold on her tightening in one last desperate attempt to reach her. I'm just about to pull back when she takes a startled breath. Her eyes come into focus, and I freeze. Before I can pull away and apologize, her lips move gently under mine, and I'm a goner.

My eyelids slide closed, and I take over the kiss. Relief makes my mouth rough—anything to keep her tied to the present. After a minute, I reluctantly pull away and press my forehead against hers as I struggle to catch my breath. "Princess, you can't do that to me again." I tangle my fingers in her hair, then pull back her head until she's forced to look at me. "We're going to work on what to do next time you get an anxiety attack, understand?"

"Ye-es," she stutters, never taking her eyes from me.

I lean closer, narrowing my eyes in warning. "Yes, sir."

Her eyes widen, and damn if my cock doesn't harden as I push her.

"Yes, sir," she says dutifully, lowering her eyes submissively and looking at me from under her lashes. I stifle a groan, my cock leaking from her obedience, and I barely resist the urge to kiss her again, afraid I won't stop.

"Good girl," I murmur, my voice husky, and then I stifle a smirk when she shivers.

Oh, she's going to be a pleasure to train.

I reluctantly untangle my fingers and release her, but I don't retreat.

As if she misses my touch, she leans toward me before catching herself. Her teal eyes glitter from within, the color looking like tourmaline crystals as she stares up at me. "You have experience with panic attacks."

It's not a question, and I barely resist shifting under her observant gaze. If I expect her to trust me, then I need to give her the same courtesy. "My family has extremely high expectations for me and my siblings. My sister and brother fell into line without a fight, their personalities snuffed out of existence, leaving behind clones of our parents."

I don't look away from her, afraid I will lose my courage. "As the youngest, I was expected to exceed their expectations, every little rebellion I staged ruthlessly crushed. If it wasn't for the guys keeping me grounded, I wouldn't have survived their…tender mercies."

When Rue reaches out and rests her hand against my chest, my breath shudders out of me. "Hence the panic attacks."

I nod once. "It's gotten better over the years, mostly through trial and error. I can teach you some techniques to help keep you calm if you want."