7. Lily

CHAPTER 7

LILY

I’m exhausted. I love this job, but I’m wiped out. I haven’t been sleeping well, and I blame it on my boss. My smoking-hot boss who makes me freeze up every time I’m around him and saying things I shouldn’t. The same boss who stood and watched a scene with me. It aroused me. I’ve never been aroused before. That was never allowed. Not in my past life, anyway.

I’ve explored my body occasionally since I left. I’ve even tried to pleasure myself the way Hannah told me she does, but it didn’t do anything for me. I thought I was broken. Or just damaged from all the stuff I’d gone through.

But then that scene happened. When I went to the bathroom a while later, my panties were soaked. I tried to touch myself before I went to bed that night. It felt good, but I didn’t experience any life-altering effects from it.

Now, every time I’m around Drake, my body reacts. My nipples ache, and my breasts feel heavy. My breathing quickens. My core clenches. It’s all so confusing.

With each step, I wince as I carry a tray of drinks to a large group, smiling through the pain. My feet are killing me.

Hannah took me to the thrift store after my second shift at Edge. With my tips from one night alone, I was able to buy seven dresses and three pairs of heels. All in dark shades, but none of them are black.

Each day, when I get dressed and look at myself in the mirror, I smile because I know my ex would have a coronary if he saw me in these colors, dark as they may be.

In the commune, women were supposed to blend in. Never be seen or heard unless summoned. They would only wear black. No makeup. No nail polish. No coloring their hair.

Words that have been chanted into my ear since I was a little girl play through my mind. I was supposed to be invisible. And I was. For so long, I let them brainwash me.

The hair on the back of my neck prickles, and I swallow the pain. Never again. I will never go back there. The ache in my feet is worth it. I’ll work myself to the bone if I have to. At least I’m doing it for myself and not him. Besides, I have medical insurance now, which means I’ll be able to get my medication on a regular basis.

I grab some empty glasses as I pass by tables and weave my way through a sea of people to drop them off at the bar.

When I finally break out of the crowd, I let my smile relax. I probably should have taken the break Shelly offered, but the last thing I want to do is make my bosses think I’m slacking.

I’m halfway to the bar when the air changes. A shiver runs down my spine, and I look around to see if anyone else notices.

Did it just get cooler in here?

Movement catches my eye, which is weird because people are moving all over the place in here. This is different, though. It’s like I can feel it. I turn my head in that direction and freeze. Because Drake is beelining for me, and he doesn’t look pleased.

I quickly plaster on my smile and hurry over to the bar. Am I not moving fast enough? Did someone complain? Shoot . Is Shelly not happy with me?

Right as I lower the tray of empty glasses, Drake strides up next to me, heat radiating from him. Part of me wants to lean into it, and another part of me, somewhere deep in my tummy, is telling me to run.

“Follow me.”

His voice is deep and commanding, leaving no room for argument. Shoulders sagging, I do as he says. This is it. I’m going to get fired, and then what am I going to do? I’m pretty sure this job is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Even though I don’t understand a lot of what goes on upstairs, I love it. Watching people scene together is addicting. I probably wouldn’t ever admit it, but I’ve wondered what it would be like to do something like that. Something so raw and intense. It also scares the daylights out of me.

Keeping up with Drake’s long strides has me practically jogging. The man is tall. His ass fills out his slacks nicely too. I want to reach out and pinch it just to see how hard it is. With as muscular as his arms are, I’d bet good money that his rear is just as fit.

Why am I staring at his butt? And why is he taking me to the restaurant?

I’ve been in here several times to pick up orders, but only into the kitchen, and we’re walking through the dining room.

The ambience is different than out in the club. It’s quieter and more intimate. White linen tablecloths and napkins. Real candles as centerpieces. It’s the nicest restaurant I’ve ever seen. Not that I’ve seen very many. Until I left the commune, I’d never even eaten out.

Hannah and her husband have taken me to dinner a couple of times, and it’s been awkward, to say the least. I don’t know how I’m supposed to order, and I don’t know what a lot of things are.

Drake finally slows when we arrive at a small table tucked back in the corner, away from the other guests. He pulls out a chair and looks at me with a raised brow.

“Sit, Lily.”

I’m confused. I want to ask what’s going on, but I’m not sure if I should. When I don’t immediately obey, the corners of his mouth twitch. He moves around me and puts his hand on my lower back, nudging me toward the chair.

“You know the safeword here is red, and even as an employee, you are allowed to use it. However, unless you do, I expect you to obey when I give you a command. Now, sit.”

I shudder and lower myself into the seat, surprised when he pushes me in.

“Did I, um, did I do something wrong?”

Instead of answering me, Drake drags the chair on the opposite side over so it’s next to mine. When he sits, the smell of his cologne drifts over me. It’s potent, and I press my legs together harder.

“Lily, why haven’t you been taking your allotted breaks?”

Huh?

I press my lips together, unsure what to say. That wasn’t what I was expecting. Shouldn’t he be happy I’m not taking my breaks?

“Lily.” His voice is low, warning lacing his tone.

Sitting a bit straighter, I try to ignore his piercing gaze. “I don’t need breaks. I’m fine. It’s not a big deal.”

A waiter approaches from behind, and I nearly levitate out of my seat. Drake immediately reaches out and covers one of my hands with his. The heat of his skin on mine is scorching yet soothing.

“Good evening. Can I get you two something to drink?”

I open my mouth to decline, but Drake speaks first.

“Can we get two glasses of water, please? And a menu.”

The waiter gives a sharp nod before he disappears as quickly as he came. I glance around the restaurant, my nerves frayed. I need to get back to work.

Drake’s hand is still covering mine. Crap . I was probably supposed to pull it away. When I try to tug it free, he tightens his grip.

“It is a big deal, Lily. If you’re not taking breaks, that means you’re eating your meals on the go, and that’s not healthy.”

My cheeks turn pink, and my tummy does a little flip as I look away from him.

“You haven’t been eating meals, have you?” His voice is even lower now. Bright red caution flags go wild in my head.

“I’ve brought packages of crackers. I grab one if I get hungry.”

His jaw clenches, and the corner of his right eye twitches. I don’t think he’s very happy with that answer. Drake is an intimidating man when he’s smiling, but right now, he’s terrifying.

“You’ve been working eight-hour shifts with no breaks and no food? Lily, that’s unacceptable. Not only do you get paid breaks, but we also provide free meals to all our employees. It’s not good to be on your feet so long, especially in heels. I expect every single one of our employees to take their two fifteen-minute breaks and thirty-minute lunch.”

Using my free hand, I pick at invisible lint on my dress. “I’m fine. It’s been busy, and the club is only open four days a week, so I have three days to rest.”

“Are you arguing with me, Lily?”

My head snaps up, and I stare at him, wide-eyed. “No. I mean, I’m not trying to argue, Sir.”

His pupils dilate. “I like you calling me that.”

Huh?

Oh, God. I called him Sir . Shoot. I’ve been hearing so many people use that honorific here that it slipped out.

“Here’s what’s going to happen,” he says in that same low tone. “You’re going to start taking every single one of your breaks. On time. I don’t care how busy it is out there. Your health and well-being are more important than any customer. You’re also going to order at least one full meal and one snack from the kitchen on each shift. If you don’t, I’ll know. And you’re going to drink three full glasses of water throughout your shift each night. Are we clear?”

I swallow heavily, my heart pounding. My ex used to scold me, but it was never like this. He was always putting me down and yelling. Never speaking quietly and firmly. And never over something that had to do with my well-being.

“Yes,” I whisper.

There’s no point giving him any other answer. Drake isn’t budging on this. I may not know the man very well, but I do know he means exactly what he says. I’m also pretty sure he always gets his way.

“‘Yes, Sir’ is better.”

My breath catches in my throat. Is it hot in here? I can’t tell if it is or if the man beside me is causing the temperature to rise.

“Yes, Sir,” I squeak.

The waiter appears again with two glasses of water and a menu, which he hands to Drake before he strides off to another table.

“What are you hungry for? The special tonight is a Japanese dish made from beef and noodles. It’s one of my favorites.”

“I’ve never had Japanese food.”

His eyebrows pinch, and his jaw clenches. He does that a lot. Especially when he doesn’t like something I say.

“You’ve never had Japanese?”

I tug on my hand, and this time, he lets me go. I wish he hadn’t because I immediately miss the way it made me feel. Calm.

“I’ve, um, I’ve never had any foreign cuisine except Mexican. My roommate took me to try it to celebrate when I got free. It was amazing. I’ve been craving a burrito again ever since.”

And I’ve said too much. Crap. Why do I vomit words around him?

Drake sets the menu down and leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. “What the fuck do you mean got free ?”

Yikes.