26. Mike

26

MIKE

I'd spent the entire day with Lila in the emergency room as she underwent what felt like a million tests to assess her head. Amber's blow had left a large bruise and cut, but no lasting damage.

But damage was relative. I was relieved that I'd gotten to Lila in time and that she was able to kick Amber with enough force for us to subdue her, saving me the additional trauma of shooting someone I'd once thought of as a close friend, but my head was going to be messed up for a long time to come.

I was grateful that the video Mrs. Scarpullo had brought into the station had helped us catch Amber in the nick of time, but I wished I'd had the intelligence to know the kind of person Amber was and stop her before she started any of this.

When I thought back to all the years I'd known her, I tried to remember a moment when the lines of friendship might have blurred between us, but I couldn't think of a single one.

I thought of her the same way I thought of Aaron, a close, platonic friend. There had been no moments of sexual tension between Amber and me, at least not from my side, and we'd both laughed when anyone would ask if we were finally a couple.

Maybe those moments had hurt her enough over the years to set this whole thing in motion, but that was no excuse for what she'd done. It was hard not to dwell on what would have happened to Lila if we hadn't seen the video in time or if I'd gotten to Lila's apartment just a few minutes later.

"Hey, Mike," Keith said, slapping my back as he met me at the station door. "How's Lila?"

"No big damage. Just a nasty bump and a lingering headache for a while. Inside her head and mine, not so great," I said with a chuckle. "The doctor gave her a number for a therapist who's in town and specializes in PTSD. I think it would be good for her, not just because of what happened today, but all the crap she dealt with from Ted."

"What about you?" Keith asked. "I've seen the police psychiatrist enough over the years. It's hard to be human and a cop at the same time. And as you have a personal stake in this?—"

"I'm going. You don't have to worry about that. It will probably take a while to shake off the guilt, if I ever do."

"You will. Some people are better actors than others and only show you what they want you to see. You believed the best of a friend you've known since preschool. That makes you a decent guy."

"But a shitty cop."

"No, it doesn't. In fact, despite being in the middle of it all, you shone on this case. See the doctor and give yourself a break. Chief's orders."

"I'll try, Chief." I smiled at him before I headed down the hall and toward the holding cell.

Amber had been charged with stalking, harassment, and attempted murder, but she was being transferred today to a hospital for a psychiatric evaluation. I didn't think I'd get any real answers or closure, but I needed to talk to her one last time.

I waited in one of the interrogation rooms as another officer brought Amber in.

Her eyes were cold as she stumbled in, her ankles in shackles.

"She leaves in ten minutes," the officer said, "so you have to make it quick."

I nodded as she shut the door.

"I don't know why you're here," she whispered, her tiny voice even smaller as she sat down.

"I'm not sure either. But I'd like some answers. I know the overall explanation for why you did what you did, but maybe you can do me one last favor and indulge me."

"Fine," she said with a weak shrug. "Not like I have anything to lose."

"How long were you following me?"

She fell back in the seat, crossing her arms as she met my gaze.

"On and off over the years, but mostly since that night at the bar and grill. I'd seen you on dates with women before, but you were different that night. You barely noticed me standing there."

"All right," I said, not arguing because I hadn't noticed anything but Lila in general at that point. "What made you do all this? What set you off?"

"I hadn't seen you kiss her the night you had to walk her to her car like a scared little kid, but it was all I heard about at the bar." She rolled her eyes. "People kept asking me about the two of you, and I had to smile and pretend I was happy for you after you'd basically forgotten about me because of that whore."

I tensed at the word but fought hard not to show it and give her the satisfaction.

"The night I keyed her car was a one-off at first. I was angry and wanted to rattle her since I saw how easy it was to do."

Her laugh unnerved me. Even now, she didn't have one shred of remorse for anything she'd done. How could I have considered someone like this a friend for so many years and have been so clueless about who she really was?

"The neighborhood punks causing trouble that same night was luck. I went to Aaron's shop the next day to see what people were saying, figuring that was the only place she could take her car to. I really didn't need an oil change."

Her eyes thinned to slits as she leaned her elbows on the table. "And there you were. The dutiful boyfriend having his fragile girl's car fixed so she never had to see the mean word again. I was hoping to see her there all freaked out, but all it did was bring you closer."

Her jaw ticked as she darted her eyes around the room.

"Then before you took her to see your mother, you hung all over her at the coffee shop, calling her sweetheart . But right before that, as she was trying to explain why she got so nervous leaving the bar, she gave me the perfect idea to get her away from you. All I had to do was write the notes with my left hand so you wouldn't recognize my handwriting."

The smile drifting across her face was pure evil. She had thrown her life away to torture and later try to kill Lila, and her chest puffed out with pride.

"I almost laughed after you screamed I love you when she had your dick in her mouth on the beach. I guess that's all it took. I should've known that in high school."

I had no words as I stared back at her, her obvious cruelty flowing freely as if I were meeting her for the first time.

Maybe I was.

How was this the same girl who used to play Super Mario with my cousins and me and who'd baked cupcakes with tiny badges when I'd graduated the police academy?

I still wasn't sure if she'd changed or if the friend I'd known all those years had never really existed.

"As sorry as I am for misreading you for all those years, I can't forgive what you did to Lila or how you targeted my sister."

She rolled her eyes again. "Don't you think it's time to stop babying her? I never saw a kid so obsessed with her brother. It's weird."

A chill ran up my spine as I remembered all the times I'd invited Amber to come somewhere with my sister and me and when I'd left Keely alone with her. My sister might have been next for all I knew, and the thought made me sick enough to taste bile in the back of my throat.

"If you'd left Keely alone, Keith may have asked a judge to go easier on you. You lost all mercy and sympathy when you did that."

"I doubt I'd have much to begin with. Anything else you want to ask me?"

I shook my head and stood. "No. I hope you get the help you need. I honestly don't know who you are. After I considered you a friend for most of my life, I have to tell you, that makes me pretty sad."

I pressed my hands against the table and leaned over, close enough to look her straight in her cold, dead eyes.

"You did all this to make me love you like I love Lila, which never would have happened. I hope you find some peace someday, but I never want to see you again."

I walked out of the room and didn't look back. I'd said what I'd needed to say, and I could replay every conversation between us since pre-K and still come up empty on any possible signs.

All I could do was give thanks I'd been able to stop her before it was too late.

Maybe I wasn't such a bad cop after all.

Keith kicked me out early and told me to take a couple of days off to be with Lila. When I unlocked her door, Lila was sitting on the couch next to my sister, looking over her shoulder at whatever book Keely was reading to her.

"Mike!" my sister yelled and ran over to me. "Dad closed the office so we could hang out with Lila. She said she was tired, so I've been reading to her."

"And she's been doing a great job," Lila said, reaching out to poke her side. "I like hearing your voice."

My sister giggled. "Do you want me to read you another one?" She pulled a Babysitter's Club graphic novel from her backpack. "This one has pictures."

I'd asked my father and Peyton to keep an eye on Lila while I'd gone to the station. Having everyone here and in one piece shouldn't have brought me such palpable joy.

Peyton came up to me and wrapped her arms around my waist. "How are you holding up, kiddo?"

I laughed. "I'm two heads taller than you, Peyton. I don't think kiddo applies." I looped my arm over her shoulders and kissed her cheek. "I'm glad to see all the important people in my life happy and okay."

"Isn't that the fucking truth," Dad whispered behind us. "I was going to tackle the bookcase and the other furniture for Lila." Dad laughed as he shook his head at my sister. "But Keely said if I hammered anything, Lila wouldn't be able to hear the story and I'd hurt her head."

"It's okay, Dad," I said as I came up to the couch and knelt on the carpet in front of Lila. "Building stuff for Lila is my job." I pressed my lips to hers, lingering long enough for her to smile into the kiss.

"There's a kid here," she whispered before scratching at the stubble on my chin.

"I can understand that," Dad said with a chuckle.

"I'm going to head home to change, and I'll be right back." I shot my father a look and motioned to the door for him to follow me.

"How did it go today?" Dad asked and shut the door behind him.

"I spoke to Amber before they shipped her to the psych hospital in Albany."

"Did you get any answers?" Dad's brow furrowed.

"No," I sighed and shook my head. "I'll never really know if she became obsessed with me over the years or if she always was—or how I missed it for so damn long."

"You know this wasn't your fault, right?" Dad stepped in front of me. "Everyone is as shocked as you were that she was capable of this."

I gave him a weak nod. "If I hadn't seen the video and watched her hold a knife to Lila's throat, I never would have suspected a thing."

"So stop blaming yourself that you didn't see what no one else saw either. Being a cop doesn't make you psychic. Keith can tell you."

"He already did." I chuckled. "I'll deal with it. Somehow. I'm not sure what to say to her parents when I see them again."

"Neither do I." Dad drifted his gaze up the block. "I cannot wait for it to get nice and boring around here again."

"Oh, trust me, me too."

"I'm sorry this happened to you both. I'm proud of you."

I gave my father a double take.

"Really?"

"I've told you I'm proud of you before." Dad squinted at me.

"Well, yeah. But this job… I know you hate it."

"I do at times, yes." He nodded as a wistful smile curved his mouth. "But this town needs good cops like you."

I cleared my throat, trying to swallow past the lump in my throat.

"That means a lot, Dad. Thank you."

" You mean a lot to me." Dad grabbed my shoulder, his eyes glossy as they held mine. "Never, ever forget that."

Right after everyone left, Lila and I ordered takeout and got into bed. I slid a gentle arm around her waist as I buried my head into the pillow.

"You could come closer," she whispered. "The injury is just to my head."

I scooted closer to her and kissed her shoulder. "How's this?"

"Better," she said, reaching behind to grab my hand and tuck it under her cheek.

"Doing okay?"

"The pain is more dull than sharp, but I guess that means I'm healing. Other than that, I'm fine. I'm sure it's going to hit me later, so I'll call the therapist next week."

She rolled over, smiling as her hazy gaze met mine.

"I've been so afraid for so long. Now I feel like I can finally live. Appreciate my life, not be afraid to go out after dark, sleep with my sexy cop boyfriend."

"I support all those things." I brushed her lips. "Because your cop boyfriend is crazy." I kissed her again. "And hopelessly in love with you."

"Can we never get out of this bed?"

"One of us is going to have to go to work eventually. But sure, why not? Although—" I glanced up at the iron headboard "—judging by what we did to my futon, we need something padded. Or else Kathy and Terry are going to get pissed at all the banging."

She laughed and clutched her head. "Ow. Easy, babe. It hurts to laugh."

"Sorry." I drifted my hand down her throat and pressed a kiss to her temple. "I'll go easy. You're safe with me."