7. Chapter Seven

7

Chapter Seven

Clara

W alking out of work Wednesday I take the biggest breath my lungs can hold then slowly let it out. Talk about a shit show, Mr. O'Brien decided to move his schedule around on his own. Well surprise, surprise he forgot half his meetings, left a random three hour gap that he swore was full of clients. Oh, and the best part, he called no one to let him know about the changes. It took me all day to call everyone and fix it. Mr O'Brien apologized profusely and promised to never touch the schedule again. I'm so thankful that today's close to over.

Between that and Rowan's texts last night my brain has been going a million miles an hour. He doesn't sound like he's just looking to hook up. He sounds like he wants serious. The problem with serious? The last time that word was relevant with me and relationships I became a verbal and physical punching bag as soon as he had me comfortable. He had me stuck, I finally told Britt after one too many "I fell down the stairs" or "the dog tripped me up" and we made a plan. I was going to get out before he escalated to Rhett. He was so disinterested in him, especially after we found out he couldn't hear. I never thought he'd hurt him though. Not until the night we left.

I'm not sure I'll ever trust someone like that again. I wouldn't survive the betrayal a second time. So I'll ask Olivia in passing, and not press when she says she'll have to check her schedule. Maybe she'll forget and I can blow him off. Even as I'm thinking it dread pulls in my stomach. Maybe this is a bad idea. I don't want to blow Rowan off, he seems sweet and I want to go out with him. Honestly, I want him to kiss me, to feel his calloused hands all over me, to know how that scruff on his face feels on my neck, my chest, in between my thighs. I felt his bulge against my stomach last night, and I'm curious to know what that feels like too. I WANT him, there's no denying that. The question is will once be enough for us to get it out of our systems and walk away?

I shake the thoughts out of my head as I slide into my car and head to pick up Rhett. It takes less than ten minutes to get to Liv's. Walking in the door to see Rhett playing with super hero figures in the middle of the floor, my heart feels lighter. He's my reason for breathing. Reaching over to the light switch on the wall I flick it on and off twice. A huge smile breaks across his face as he looks up then runs and jumps into my arms. Hands going a million miles an hour to tell me all about his day. Giving him the biggest smile before setting him down I sign, "Okay, okay. I can't wait to hear about your day. Go clean up your toys while I talk to Ms. Olivia and you can tell me all about it when we get home. Is that a plan?"

He smiles so big it squishes his cheeks up and makes his eyes squint, "Yes! Movie tonight? Turtle movie?" Nodding in confirmation, he runs off.

"He had a great day, well he always has a great day so I guess he had a typical day for him. You know I adore him. If I could have him everyday I would. He's such a sweet soul. You're doing an amazing job, Clara. Raising such a little gentleman."

That has my eyes watering, "Thank you so much. He makes being his Mama so easy. So, I wanted to ask you, is there any way you'd want to watch Rhett for a few hours Saturday evening?"

That has Olivia's whole face lighting up, "I've been waiting for you to ask me to watch him so you can have some time to yourself for six months. If you're not working you have him and I know that's not easy. You deserve a break. I'd love to watch him. I can even watch him overnight if you want? Honestly Clara, take the night and get some good rest."

My heart rate instantly spikes, "Oh no, no I'll get him. I'd drop him off at about five and pick him up at ten at the latest. We have a hard time sleeping away from each other." She nods in understanding. Olivia wasn't always a stay at home mom with a firefighter husband. She was a single mom once upon a time too. From what I've been told Cooper swooped in and fell in love with her and her kids. The rest is history, but she doesn't forget what it was like. Single moms just get it. Rhett runs over as we finalize the details and pulls on my hand to go to the car. We laugh and say goodbye, as I lead him to the car and head home. Now to text Rowan and tell him.

I've just laid Rhett down after the longest bedtime routine ever. Of course the day couldn't end without him dragging every task out an extra five minutes each. He's finally in bed and drifting off when I pick up my phone and see a text from Rowan.

Rowan: "Don't forget to let me know about Saturday. I'm looking forward to it. Hope you've had a great day, Pretty Girl."

I give myself a minute to back out, but of course I don't. However, thinking it over I decide that giving him an out just in case he's come to his senses since last night might be a good idea.

Clara: "I actually talked to Rhett's sitter when I picked him up. She's going to watch him Saturday from five in the evening to ten at night if that time frame works. If not, it's fine. We can try again another time."

Of course he texts back immediately solidifying that he is either the most flexible man I've ever met, or he's willing to fit into whatever slot of time I can carve out. I'm refusing to ponder on which it is for fear of it being the latter.

Rowan: Perfect. I'll pick you up at six thirty and make sure you're on time to get Rhett. I can't wait to see you again.

How does he put me at ease with just a few words? I smile contently and shoot off one last text refusing to overthink it. Putting my phone down I turn on the T.V to watch the latest episode of the reality show I've been binging in what little spare time I have. I settle into my bed and get comfortable.

Clara: "I hope Saturday comes soon. Goodnight Rowan."

* * *

Rowan

My eyes are burning from lack of sleep as I'm driving home from a long day at the warehouse. We really need to figure out who the fuck is getting in there and how as soon as possible. We've moved all of our product to a new location, and made sure only about ten of us know where it is. That ten includes me and my brothers, we'll learn quickly who's telling what. I'm so ready for Saturday, it seems so far away, I've found myself missing Clara and Rhett an obsessive amount the past few days. As I pull onto the highway to get home quicker I dial Kellum's number, it's been a few days since I've heard from him. He answers on the second ring, instantly I can tell he seems distracted.

"Yeah?…"

"Um, I require your full attention when we're on the phone. I'm a needy fucker like that." His sigh echoes through every speaker in the car.

"How can I help you, Rowan?"

"Don't sound so happy to talk to me. So what if, hypothetically, I had a friend who was going on a date with his best friend's receptionist? What's the protocol for that?" There's a long pause, so long I wonder if his service dropped.

"Run that by me one more time because I know you didn't just say what I think you did."

"Oh fuck off. I can date. I go on dates." I don't know why I called him, it's like calling Kieran. Just can't help but bust my balls for sport. It's because they're both middle children, I'm sure of it. They were forgotten one too many times now they take it out on me.

"Roe, we've been friends our entire lives and I've never seen you with a girl more than maybe two times max before you trade them out for a new piece of ass. Now you have your sights set on my receptionist? So she can quit when you drop her for new pussy in a week? Dude, she's the best employee I've got."

Okay now I'm pissed. First off, I'll take him to the warehouse if he speaks about her like that again. Secondly, the realization that he thinks so little of me that he's so sure I'd fuck with him like that is wild. All I've seen since that day at Kellum's office is her. It's crazy and it makes no sense, but it's her. She's it. I can feel it deep in my bones.

"I'm going to give you a pass because we've been friends for so long, but if you ever talk to me with such blatant disrespect again I WILL pull rank on you Kellum. It would be remiss of you to bite the hand that feeds you. I wasn't asking your permission to do shit. I was calling to talk to my best friend about a date I'm going on. Never mind, I'll holler at you later." He yells out before I can cut the call.

"Whoa, okay, stop. Don't hang up, fuck. I didn't realize you were being serious. I'm sorry. Okay, so you're taking Clara out. You're obviously taking this more seriously than usual. What's the problem?" I'm terrible at talking about this stuff. It's why I was so quick to snap at him, well that and the little fact that I could use at least fourteen hours of uninterrupted sleep.. My hand finds its new home, running through the short strands at the top of my head .

"The problem is that I'm ready to go all in, and she seems really skittish. It could be that she's a mom, but I don't know, Kel. I could have Mac really dig into the depths of her past, but that seems so invasive when I actually like her. At the same time, I'm pretty sure someone hurt her. I'm just not sure how bad it was."

"Yeah, I get what you mean, her head is always on a swivel. At the same time she'll flip when she inevitably finds out you looked into her. I'd let her tell you when she's ready. You seem really into her, and I'm glad. You've done nothing but work and raise your brothers for close to three years, Roe. You've kept the organization running and strong. You have legitimate businesses turning an insane profit. You've taken guardianship of the twins, without blinking. Dude, we're in our twenties and you're raising teenagers. Let's not forget how you're still the father figure for the other three. You have so much on your plate, it's time you find something or someone to make you happy. Someone who can give you reprieve. How you haven't broken at this point is beyond me." I pull into the garage, before making my way to the office in the house.

"I don't know, I'm just not able to. Hell, I still haven't been able to grieve for my parents. I went from oldest sibling to "stand in dad" in a blink. Maybe you're right. Maybe I do need something just for me." As I'm sitting at my desk I'm already setting the phone on speaker so I can work and talk at the same time. I can hear Kellum shuffling around. He must be leaving work.

"It can't hurt. I know we don't say cheesy shit like this, but I am proud of you, Roe."

"Thanks, Kel." The line goes quiet for a minute before Kellum comes back through the lin e

"Hey, I gotta go. That's an important account calling in. Let me know how Saturday goes though, okay?"

"Yeah, talk to you later."

I kill the call as soon as he switches over as I'm pulling up financial reports from some of our clubs. I'm so fucking tired, but you know what they say. No sleep for the wicked.

* * *

Sitting across from me on Friday mid day, Mac sets his laptop on my desk in my office. Dec is leaning on the wall, arms crossed silently, and Nolan is posted up outside the door as usual. "I'm telling you, you need to hear this." When Mac barged into my office five minutes earlier with Dec on his heels, his hair disheveled and his eyes wide, telling me I needed to hear what he caught on the bug. He started immediately setting his laptop up.

Honestly he would have been more frazzled if they would have walked in ten minutes earlier and caught me with my dick in my hand, literally. I can't help it, Clara won't leave my mind, that perfect body, those fuckable lips, and those brown eyes just begging me to take control and give her a break from whatever constantly swirls in her mind. And since I'm not able to touch her yet I'll make up scenarios in my head and try to hold myself over until she lets me. I'll have arthritis by next week at this point.

Shifting my focus back to the here and now as I nod and he presses play. Instantly Nikolai's voice fills the room. "I DON'T CARE! I know, the Irish and the Italians are working together. They lulled us into a false sense of security a few years ago when we let them take out those low-level soldiers. They're trying to cut off our supply at the head. They want us gone!" I look to both my brothers confused at what the fuck this old man is talking about.

"Wait, keep listening." Mac murmurs and the audio cuts back in.

A voice I don't recognize starts in, "I hear you, boss. Really I do. I agree we need to make a move and take one of them out, but we can't go in half cocked."

Nikolai huffs, "I know, I know we need a solid plan. We'll take out the Irish then the Italians. Rowan is young and cocky. He knows he holds the power as our main distributor. We take them out and we control the product. We raise the prices and we bleed the Italians dry."

"It'll take time to form a plan, boss." the mystery voice states.

Nikolai booms, "I don't give a shit what it takes. Get it done and get it done soon. I'm over this. We finish it as soon as possible."

The audio stops and we all look between each other with equal expressions of disbelief. Declan speaks first, "What the hell. He's really lost it. He's completely lost the plot."

I scrub my hand down my face, "Nikolai is unpredictable on his best day, who knows what this is going to bring. Dec, I want our security detail doubled. I want a minimum of three guys on each of us at all times. Especially the twins. I want them inside the school. Fuck, stand in the back of the damn class. Nikolai thinks he's crazy? That motherfucker can't even comprehend the crazy I'll unleash if he so much as breathes in one of your directions. And for the love of all things holy, delete Natasha's number out your fucking phone!" Turning to Mac I lift my chin, "Good job, Mac. Let us know if there's any more chatter. Nikolai likes to hear himself speak. If he's going to make a move he'll talk about it first. I'll call the Capo and let him know what we've got."

With our plan in place Dec and Mac make their way out of the office. Dec gets to the doorway and stops at the threshold and turns to face me, "Be careful Roe, I know you really like this chick, and that's cool. All I can say is think long and hard before you bring her into this shit storm that's brewing." With that he shuts my door behind him and my hands instantly go to my temples. What the hell am I thinking? I can't taint her and Rhett with this life. As my thoughts start spiraling my phone vibrates. Picking it up and opening the text. It's a group chat between my brothers and I.

Kieran: "The tutor just showed up. You guys better hurry up, I'm already catching on quicker than all of you combined."

Flynn: "You fucking wish. Do I need to remind you who signed ‘vagina' instead of ‘pizza' yesterday? Because it sure as fuck wasn't us."

Declan: "I'm coming, don't start without me or I swear I'll shave your head in your sleep."

Kieran: "@Flynn IT WAS ONE TIME!"

Mac: "I'm locking up the tech room now. She's early, you guys can wait."

Sully: "I'm pulling in now! I got stuck at a red light."

Yeah, I think the safest place for those two might be with us after all. Pushing to my feet I start to walk to the living room, as I shoot off a text. Nolan follows behind me, because, yes, my staff as well as every soldier on the grounds has to learn too.

Rowan: "You guys fight worse now than when we were all kids. That being said, if I get down there and you guys already started I'm changing the locks. Oh and none of you fuckers have caught on as quick as me I'll be damned if you guys can talk to my kid better than I can."

* * *

I'm back at my desk combing through finance reports from our legitimate businesses later that evening. Taking off my glasses to rub the bridge of my nose, my head begins to hurt from staring at the papers too long. I only allow myself to wear glasses when I'm in for the night. Glasses are a hazard in my line of work and it takes nothing to knock them off. Since my eyesight actually is pretty bad without assistance, contacts are my only logical option. My mind is in a tailspin, it feels like I'm running a million miles an hour. I'm unable to settle my thoughts or focus enough to get these reports done. I haven't talked to Clara all day, and I want to know how their day went.

My fingers itch to bring up her number and call her. It's not late, they're definitely still awake. Allowing myself to ponder it for a few more seconds my anxiety wins out. I just need to hear her voice, to know her and Rhett are okay. Bringing the phone to my ear I'm hoping she picks up, "Hello?" That's all it takes. One word from that sweet voice to settle deep into my psyche and begin to calm me.

"How was your day, Pretty Girl? "

"Uneventful, I'm cleaning up dinner right now, then I'll have to go. Rhett and I have a date with a bunch of blankets, pillows, and a movie. How was your day?" She sounds unsure of herself and I hate that.

I want to help her build herself up enough so she knows she never has to be unsure of anything. Especially not us. Clara Saunders is a goddess and I intend to give her all the tools for her to raise up and rule my kingdom. Smiling at the phone like a loon, "Same, I'm going over reports right now. I haven't had a chance to text you today so I figured I'd call. How was Bear's day?" The smile in her voice is palpable as she tells me about Rhett's day with the babysitter. Apparently he climbed to the very top slide at the park today, and even turtle made the journey with him. My chest constricts and a sensation of belonging washes through me.

"Well, it seems the adventures of Bear and turtle were a huge success today."

She laughs quietly then sobers, "Hey Rowan?"

My guard goes up by the tone of her voice, "Yes, Pretty Girl."

"Why us? You seem like the perfect guy. Surely you have your pick of any girl out there. Why would you want the damaged single mom who keeps you at an arm's length?"

I smile, this is an easy question, "The other girls don't even exist anymore. Since the day I first laid eyes on you, you're all I see. I know this is fast, but Clara, when you know you know…. And I definitely know." I hear her take a sharp inhale. Silence on the other line has me waiting on a baited breath.

"Do you want to come over and watch a movie with Rhett and I?"

A huge smile splits my face, "I'll be there in ten."