Epilogue

Ryker

Two years later…

A lot has changed and yet everything is still the same. Tara never left my side after the day we taught Garret a lesson in manners. Her mother hasn't reached out to her at all. Neither has any other Brisbane for that matter. Garret survived and the cops never came for us. Good to see he's smart enough to keep his mouth shut. I heard it had to be wired for a while though. Oops.

Knox's club is turning a damn good profit. Once he got it all fixed up, Tara asked to run the business end of it for him, which is phenomenal. Knox is thrilled. She is too. Between spending her days there and nights at the Monarch with me, she's always busy, which makes her deliriously happy.

My girl is smart as a whip. Have I said that already? We're about to open another sex club, too. Only this one doesn't cater to the elite. Anyone can join if they meet the criteria and keep to the rules. We'll see how it goes.

Tara named it the Luna club.

Fucking killer, right? And ironic. Did you know Luna moths only live for about a week? Adults don't even have mouths, so they can't eat. They mate, reproduce, then die.

What a life.

My old apartment building on Greene Street was purchased for a cool three-hundred thousand at auction. It got turned into a park, of all things. There's a walking path, basketball courts, a huge playground, and a baseball diamond. I love coming here.

Tipping my head back, I bask in the summer sun and stretch my arms out on the bench. My Butterfly should be here in about a half hour. We have dinner reservations at six to celebrate my birthday, but I got here early to enjoy the peace this place brings me.

"Ryker?"

My head shoots up at the sound of that voice. Standing in front of me is a woman in black leggings, a tank top, and running shoes. "Oh my god, it is you."

Natalie.

Her name sticks in my throat like thorns. I grind my molars, hoping like hell my brain will make my mouth work, but I'm short circuiting. I thought I'd put my anger to bed over my past, but clearly, that's not the case.

"Can I sit with you?"

Why can't I make words come out of my face?

Natalie drops next to me and folds her hands in her lap, sighing.

Is this really happening right now?

"It's been a long time." She looks over at me. "You've done really well for yourself. I see Knox has too. How are Dmitri and Vault?"

"Are you really going to play this bullshit game with me, Natalie?" There we go. Finally. My mouth does work. Now if I can get the rest of me going, I'll be much better off.

"I've wanted to reach out to you but…" She gazes at the pond across from us. "I can't believe they tore down the building and put this in its place."

I stand up.

"Wait." Natalie grabs my hand and I rip away from her.

"Don't fucking touch me." My heart pounds in my chest. "How can you even sit here with me, like we're friends, after what you did?"

Her mouth turns down and eyebrows bunch. "I've thought of a million ways to say I'm sorry to you, Ryker. Sorry for bringing you into sex work. Sorry for the way I treated you. Sorry for not doing a better job of being there for you in the end."

"The end." Is that what she calls murdering my mother? "You ghosted."

"I know."

"You killed her, and you ghosted." I toss my hands up. "Jesus fucking Christ, what are you even doing here, Nat?"

She takes in a deep breath. "I know what you think, but you're wrong." She looks up at me, squinting against the sunlight. "I didn't kill Ashley, Ry."

It takes forever for my mouth to engage. "You said it was a mercy."

"It was." Her voice shakes and it pisses me off. She doesn't get to cry about my mom. "She knew what you were doing."

I suddenly can't feel my feet. Dropping back onto the bench, I sway with dizziness. "What?"

"She knew you were an escort."

She's lying. My mom could never have found out about that. I'd been so careful. "Bullshit."

"I'm telling you the truth. She knew everything, Ry." Natalie sniffles. "She wasn't disappointed in you for your choices. She just didn't want you to have to keep doing it for her sake."

"I'm so tired," Ashley says, struggling to inhale. Her breathing's changed lately, but today is definitely the worst it's ever been.

"Go to sleep, Ash." Sitting on the side of her bed, I mark the page of the novel I'm reading to her and place the book on the foot of the bed. "We can pick it up again tomorrow."

"No." Her chest rises in short little bursts. "I'm tired."

Yep. Got it. "Ryker's gonna be home really soon. I'm surprised he isn't already." I know she likes to wait up for him. It makes the guilt of knowing what he's out there doing so much worse. I'm the one who brought him into this lifestyle. I'm the one who's fucked him up. I was only trying to help, but I now see it was a huge mistake.

Ryker's no longer using escorting to make money. He's relying on it as a distraction.

Ashley's voice sounds raspy. "I know… why he's out… every night." Her eyes are barely open. "I didn't believe… for one minute… that my old company has been… paying our insurance… or that he's… working construction to… pay the bills." She coughs again. "He never comes home dirty."

Ryker would beg to differ on that. But Ashley's version of dirty is not the same as Ryker's.

Guilt has me panicking to change the subject. "Why don't I get you some water, Ash. And maybe another pillow."

"No." Her breaths grow more labored. "Tell me the… truth. Is he… going to be okay?" A tear slides down her sunken face. The hollows of her cheeks have become so much more pronounced over the past two weeks.

My heart cracks into pieces.

"Yes," I tell her. "He'll be okay."

"I'm so tired." Ashley closes her eyes. "Tell him… when he gets home… you tell him… I'm so proud of who he's become… tell him… I love my sweet boy… so much."

Fuck. I can't do this. "Let me call and see where he is."

Ashley's fingers are ice on my hand. She weakly shakes her head. "I'm so tired."

"Then go to sleep," I whisper, finally hearing what Ashley's been saying for months. She's tired, and she's been hanging on for Ryker and can't anymore.

Oh god. Numbness creeps into my system.

"It's okay," I say, quietly. My heart fractures when I climb into bed with her and hold her tight. "You can go to sleep, Ashley. He'll be home soon. He'll be home and…" I swipe my hot tears away. "And he'll know you love him so much. You've been an amazing mom. You should be so proud of him. He's smart and strong and sweet and caring." I know the moment she's gone, but I can't shut up. "He's such a great kid. He's going to be a great man."

I hold her long after she stops breathing.

Long after my heart bursts into a hundred million pieces.

She wasn't just Ryker's mom. She was the closest thing I've had to a best friend. Ashley knew I was an escort and didn't once shame me for it. I'd tell her my wild stories, and we'd laugh with how crazy some of my dates would get. I never once told her Ryker was part of it. If she really does know the truth, I have no clue how she could have possibly found out.

And now, it doesn't matter...

"That's why I told you it was a mercy," she says, swiping the tears off her face. "I didn't kill her, Ry. I just gave her permission to…"

"Let go," we both say at the same time.

I lean back on the bench and scrub my face. Holy hell.

Natalie clears her throat. "It was a mercy to you too, because when she died, you were free to stop escorting. Her death could be a new beginning for you. I should have never let you into my world like that. And you should have never lied to me about your age, either."

I don't say a word. What's done is done.

Natalie sniffles, but she's no longer crying. "I moved back here a couple years ago, and I come to this park every day for a morning run. I had appointments all day and didn't get here until now, otherwise, I'd have never run into you. I guess the universe knew it was time for our paths to cross again."

She's still an escort.

Nat stands up and tucks a few loose strands of hair behind her ear. "She would have really loved this park."

When Natalie walks away, my mouth goes off the rails. "Nat?"

She looks over her shoulder at me.

"Thank you. For everything."

Her shoulders drop. She nods and starts running again, farther, and farther away from me, around the bend, out of my sight.

I wait for rage to surface. Remorse. Regret. I feel none of it.

Only peace.

"Well, hello, Mr. Hudson."

I quickly pinch my eyes, wiping the half-fallen tears off, and clear my throat. "Hey, Mrs. Hudson."

Did I mention we got married six months ago?

Tara saunters over, looking like a decadent feast for the eyes. "Who was that you were talking to?"

"No one important." My girl knows I'll tell her eventually, so she never pushes. We share trauma only when we're ready. It's part of our ongoing healing process.

I stand up and whistle as Tara gives me some three-sixty spin action. "That dress is killer, Butterfly."

"I was going for a widow maker meets Suzie housewife vibe." She kicks her foot up to reveal their red soles. "I nailed it."

"Mmmm I'd like to nail you." My arms become two anacondas around her waist. "Fuck dinner. I'm eating you instead." She squeals when I haul her over my shoulder. Smacking her ass, I carry her to my car and drop her carefully on the curb. "Grilled cheese in bed?"

Tara fluffs her dress out. "Can I sit on your face while wearing this thing?"

"As if you even have to ask."

"Good. I made chocolate pudding earlier today, too." Tara's smile is brighter than the sun. "Who loves you, baby?"

Tipping her chin with my finger, I smile against her mouth. "You."

"Mmm hmm." She kisses me hard enough to make my toes curl. "Now take me home, Ryker Hudson, and let's celebrate what a great man you are."

God damn, I love my life.