Chapter 12

"Are you alright?"Professor Montgomery asks the next day as the other students start to leave the room, our advanced writing class now coming to an end.

She slides a little closer on the sofa in one of the study rooms in the library, her auburn brows tugging in concern. I'm generally not this spaced out in class—especially in hers—but today, my mind is elsewhere.

It's back at the club from last night. I can't seem to get that stranger out of my head, or what we did together. The way he smelled, the way he sounded when he did utter a word, it was…I don't know…

He could've been anyone.

But I felt like I knew him somehow, or maybe I'm just hoping I did. Would be easier to stomach that than the fact that I let a complete stranger touch me like that. Give me my first orgasm.

Shame fills my gut.

Why does it feel like I cheated on Devlin? He isn't mine, yet I feel bad anyway. Like I just betrayed him.

"Whatever it is, you're always free to talk to me," she says. "I know it's hard for you to talk to your father. It's hard growing up with a strong male figure in your life who still views you like a child. I understand. My father was the same."

Her golden eyes glisten with kindness as she forms a tight-lipped smile.

"How did you get past that?"

"Well, time, I guess." She laughs solemnly. "But everything was a fight with him. He always viewed my brothers as the strong ones, always underestimating me." She sighs. "But it took proving to him that I'm a capable person before he gave me the same respect that he gave them."

She throws one long leg over the other, her red stilettos as beautiful as she is. She has this refined sophistication about her. But it's not her beauty I admire. It's her mind and her talent. She's an author of many psychological thrillers that have hit bestseller lists, but she's said that teaching has always been a passion of hers.

The professor has been such a support to me through this—hiding what I want to do from my father. She's given me books on improving my writing, given me extra work to better my character development. I don't know what I'd do without her. She really wants her students to succeed.

"I want you to know that you're not alone." A line forms between her eyes. "It's hard being a young woman in today's world. But you're a strong, capable woman who can accomplish whatever you want. The path you set for yourself is yours to take. You're the driver. No one else." She grabs my hand and squeezes. "Don't let anyone steal your shine, Eriu Quinn."

I nod, knowing that Mason will suck all the joy from my life. He will suck every drop of my willpower and talent until I have nothing left to give.

"Are you married?" I ask her.

We've never discussed her personal life, so I have no idea if she even has kids.

"No." She shakes her head and scrunches her nose. "I never had any desire to settle down with just one person."

"I get it." I bow my head.

"Is your father making you get married?"

I raise my eyes to hers and nod.

"Oh, God." She rolls her eyes. "You're just a child! That is outrageous. Is this an arranged marriage situation?"

I nod again. I shouldn't be saying anything to her, but who would she tell? She knows nothing of my family, and it's not like I'm a minor. Even if she Googled me, she'd find nothing. My family looks clean on paper.

"It'll be okay." I shake it off and bear a grin. "My father means well, and the guy he chose for me isn't too bad."

I almost sound believable.

"You can't lie to me." She runs a hand through her shoulder-length brown hair, giving me a comforting look. "You should tell him it's not what you want. Stand firm."

"Yeah, I'll try that." I almost laugh, because that wouldn't matter to my father. "I should go. I need to grab some food before my next class."

"Of course." She reaches into her briefcase. "Before you go, I have a few more craft books for you on different writing techniques that you may find interesting."

She hands me a set of three, and I grow giddy with excitement.

"I can't wait to read them. Thank you so much!"

"You're my best student. I want to watch you succeed. Just don't tell the others I said that." She laughs. "Now go, get out of here. I have papers to grade."

I rise to my feet with the biggest grin. "Okay. See you next week."

"Yes. Bye now."

With my bag slung over my shoulder, I head out of the building and toward my car, hoping to grab some off-campus food. But when I reach my vehicle, I find an unwelcome surprise.

Mason stands there, leaning against the driver's side, his eyes flashing with visible rage. "Where you been? Your class has been over for a while."

Does he have my schedule?

Nausea churns in my gut, and my insides curl from fear.

How can I marry this man?

Maybe the professor was right. Maybe I can make my father see reason.

"Uh…hi? What are you doing here?"

My pulse hammers from his icy glare. How quickly can I make him leave?

"I'm your husband. I don't need permission to see you."

Breathe.

Just breathe and calm down.

"You're my fiancé, not my husband." I force a smile.

He chuckles humorlessly and his jaw tightens before he returns that ugly stare that has me bathed in fright.

"I asked you where you were."

My body shivers.

Where's Devlin? He has to be close. He always is.

Mason backs off the car and marches directly toward me. I jump a step back, my breath hitching.

"I—I was talking to a professor, and now I'm heading to lunch."

He stares down at me bitterly, as though unsure whether he finds my answer acceptable.

"Great, let's go get lunch. I have my car, so we can stop by that retro diner not far from here." He grabs my hand, but I tug it away.

"Eriu? Everything okay?" Devlin's voice is a welcome relief.

Tears threaten behind my eyes when I whirl around toward him, suddenly feeling safer now that he's here. I rush over to him, and though he doesn't reach for my hand, his finger brushes mine, and I almost burst into tears. With just that touch, every cell within me blossoms to life. My chin trembles and more tears gather.

Mason comes to stand between us.

"Devlin," he says coolly by way of greeting. "You don't need to follow her around when I'm here. That's my job now."

Devlin eyes him intensely and stalks closer until his chest meets Mason's. "Until her father tells me otherwise, Eriu is under my protection. Wherever she goes, so do I. I don't take orders from you. We understand each other?"

Mason's nostrils flare, his mouth set in a wry smile. "Clearly." He backs off just enough to give me space. "Assuming you're going to be joining us for lunch?" He cocks a brow.

"Aye." Devlin holds his stare while my throat throbs and anguish fills my chest.

He sees it. Devlin sees my pain, and instead of telling my father he wants me, instead of saving me from it all, he watches me walk away with a man who isn't him.

When will I ever learn? I'm alone. I always will be.

We arrive at the diner and immediately take a seat at a table, with Devlin taking his at the one beside us. His attention never leaves me, and the severe look on his face should terrify Mason, but he acts like he's untouchable, grinning at Devlin as though saying what the hell will you do?

I can sense the anger in my future husband, feel it as though he's hurting me already. Like I know he will once we're married.

I won't do it. I'll find a way out of this on my own.

A waitress approaches us. Her sunny disposition does nothing to quell the fear breathing life within me.

"Can I get you two something to drink?"

"Just water for me." I force my features to look anything but terrified. I don't know if I've succeeded.

"And for you, sir?"

Mason grabs my hand and drags it into his own. His thumb roughly brushes my skin as he looks up at her with a smile. It's one of those smiles that would melt a woman, but I know who he truly is.

"I would love some iced tea." He gives a momentary look to her name tag. "Thank you, Macy."

"Not a problem. Coming right up."

A minute later, she's setting the drinks before us, and we place our orders.

He still has my hand in a tight grip as she struts away, and I'm afraid he'll cause a scene if I yank it away. I pass a glance at Devlin, who's staring at us with a predatory glare, his gaze bouncing to our hands.

"Stop looking at him," Mason barks.

I dash my attention to him immediately, finding his face twisted with rage.

My own anger shoots through me, and I bite down hard to stop myself from having an anxiety attack. "Why are you really here? Are you spying on me?"

My heart races almost out of my chest from my bravery. He doesn't seem like the kind of man who appreciates being questioned.

"Now, is that how a fiancée talks to her future husband?" He jerks my hand closer to his until I feel my shoulder pull.

When I groan, there's a satisfied look on his face.

"I'm gonna make a few changes once we're married," he goes on. "For starters, you're no longer gonna have that bodyguard watching you. I will have one of my family guards on your detail. At all times. I'm also going to tell your father that I want to move the wedding up. Why wait?"

Nausea hits my gut.

Nonono. This can't be happening.

My pulse drums faster until I grow lightheaded. He keeps talking, but I just can't be here anymore. I'm gonna pass out.

He leans in as he says, "A few days before the wedding, I will take you to my family doctor and have you checked to make sure your virginity is still intact. And if it"s not, we"re done, do you understand me? If someone else has touched you before I do, I will destroy you. I will paint you as a whore, and no one will want you."

My chest rises with quickened inhales as I peek at him breathlessly.

His eyes narrow, irises turning darker as he takes me in with revulsion.

I will not allow him to demean me this way. I yank my hand out of his grasp.

"That's insane," I snap with a whisper-shout. "I will do no such thing."

With a mocking smirk, he roughly grabs my wrist until his fingers pinch around it. But before I can ask him to stop hurting me, Mason's screaming in agony as Devlin bends his hand backward until his fingers look like they're about to break.

With my hand released, I rub at where he's hurt me as eyes from other patrons land on us.

"Um, is everything okay here?" our waitress asks.

"Oh, yeah. We're fine." Devlin grins. "Just teaching the fella how to be a gentleman. Isn't that right?"

He stares at Mason, and when he doesn't nod, he bends his hand some more. With a groan, Mason starts cooperating and nodding.

"Doing just fine here," he spits through gritted teeth.

"Okay…" The waitress appears terrified. "But please end this before my manager calls the cops."

"Not a problem. Almost done here."

Her mouth trembles right before she stalks off in a hurry.

As soon as she's gone, Devlin looks at me. "Did he hurt you?"

I nod.

Devlin's entire face transforms, and I shudder. He leans in toward Mason's face.

"Touch her like that again, and you're gonna bloody well see what I'm gonna do to the rest of your hand." Then, without another word, he bends one of his fingers hard until a popping sound is heard.

Mason starts to scream.

"Shut up now, or I break another finger."

He grunts, his exhales heavy, chest rattling.

"Now you listen, because I won't give you another warning. If you hurt her in any way again, I'll cut off your entire hand. Stay away from her, and don't you dare come around her again. Understand me, arsehole?"

He drops Mason's hand, and he immediately jumps to his feet, a wide-eyed glare bouncing between us.

"I'm gonna have your head for this, you fucking Irish bastard!" He holds on to his finger like it's made of glass. "You're gonna find out how powerful the Reynolds name is when I'm through with you."

"That's all very exciting," Devlin taunts with a low, dry chuckle. "Let me know how I can get tickets to that pretend show of yours."

The more he laughs, the redder Mason's face gets.

With a frustrated growl, he rushes out of the restaurant, still grasping his hand.

Devlin immediately turns to me, concern fitted in the furrow of his brows. "Are you okay, love?"

He cups my cheek in his large, masculine hand, his eyes full of affection and worry.

Would he care if he were to find out that I let another man touch me? Do things I've wanted him to do to me?

He slides in next to me, still holding my face, his other hand now grasping my fingers, like he doesn't wanna let me go.

Moisture builds behind my eyes as I shake my head. "I'm never going to be okay married to him. I have to talk to my father. I have to make him see reason. Mason told me he wants to move up the wedding!"

"Feckin' bloody bastard." A thunderous expression washes over his face. "I tried to speak to your father."

"What?" His thumb draws circles to the corner of my mouth and I shiver.

"I tried to tell your father Mason wasn't the right fit for you the night you met him, but he wouldn't listen."

"Of course he wouldn't." For my father to see reason, I need something bigger on Mason.

But losing my virginity is the easier solution. If Mason backs out of the wedding himself, that will alleviate all of my worries.

The waitress brings the food over and sheepishly places two plates down before disappearing. I can't even look at food right now. The thought of eating the chicken panini I ordered makes me sick.

Devlin picks up a knife and fork and starts to cut into it. Good. I'm glad he'll get to enjoy the food I won't eat.

The back of my hand glides down my cheek where his touch was, and my heart clenches.

"Open up for me." He nears the fork to my mouth.

"What are you doing?"

The instant our gazes meet and the blue within his eyes shimmers with that affection, I almost forget why I'm upset in the first place.

"I'm feedin' you, you brat." His slight smirk makes my heart flutter. "Now open up. You've gotta eat."

He places the small bite of food past my lips. As he does, his attention falls to my mouth and he watches me through hooded eyes.

My body instantly prickles. It's like his hands are there, brushing over my skin, tempting me with his body and his heart.

Does he feel it between us? This indescribable connection?

He continues to feed me until all the food's gone, but all I've been focused on is him.

"How was it?" His deep, sultry voice settles in my gut, coiling down my body until I'm warm and wanton.

"Delicious," I whisper, my heartbeats quickening the more his eyes bore into mine.

He grunts as he peers at my lips like he wants to kiss me, and I wish he would. I lean in closer, our knees touching, butterflies erupting from within me.

"You've got a little something." He points to the corner of my mouth, and I fumble as I wipe. "No, not there." His lips spread into a half-smile. "Let me."

I hold my breath as his thumb feathers over my mouth, and it stays there for long moments while his gaze remains locked with mine.

"Eriu…" he breathes.

"Yeah?"

My heart beats faster. Every feeling is amplified, wanting so badly to kiss him.

Please tell me you want me as much as I want you. That you'll marry me and end this hell.

"The check whenever you're ready." The waitress zaps us out of this moment, and he immediately turns to her.

"Yep, gonna pay now."

He hands her a credit card, and she walks away with it.

"I'll drive you back to school," he tells me.

"Yeah, thanks." I play with the hem of my shirt, unable to look at him with what I'm feeling.

Will it ever stop? Will I always be in love with Devlin McHale?

I can't imagine anything worse than that. Not even my marriage to Mason Reynolds.