Chapter 1

"Letter for you, McHale."A prison officer tosses an envelope into the slot of the six-by-eight box that's been my home for about a year.

That is, of course, when I wasn't stuck in solitary for killing a man. I had no choice, though. It was a hit. He was out for my blood, so I took his. Choked the life out of him.

He didn't stand a chance against me. No one ever has.

I don't know who sent him, but whoever it was must've been connected to the guy I'm accused of killing and the reason I'm in here.

I've got a feeling it was Gio Marino of the Messina crime family who organized the hit. Would be fitting. I did murder his friend, after all. Or so he thinks. But the bastard deserved it. Was connected to a trafficking ring.

Gio came to see me some months back, asking questions about that night. Wanting to know what happened. I'll never tell him the truth, though. I'll be taking that to my grave.

Don't know why he'd wanna associate with the likes of that fella. The Messinas never were the type to dabble in people.

But let him think it was me who killed his friend. That was the point. I'd take the fall for it every single time just so I could keep Eriu safe.

She's not just anyone. She's the youngest daughter of Patrick Quinn, the man I work for and the head of the Irish Mob in Boston.

After I got out of solitary, Patrick forced the warden to erase the incident from my record. Pinned it on someone else who's serving a life term for killing some kids. The Quinn family is powerful, and their connections run deep.

I get to my feet, already knowing who the letter is from before I even open it. She's the only one who cares enough about a bastard like me to write them. I've got no one else who gives a damn. Family's all dead. Hers is the only family I've got left.

As I trace her name on the envelope, my body strains, knowing it's wrong to think of her the way I am right now. She's only eighteen and, most importantly, Patrick's daughter. She's not meant for me.

But in the last few months, my feelings for her have become more than I can endure. I never dared to think about her that way, not until a few months ago when she confessed in a letter that she has real feelings for me.

And for a moment, I wondered what that would feel like. To have someone who actually loves me.

Of course, I told her nothing could ever happen. That she was being foolish. She was merely a child. Yet she isn't much of a child now, is she?

But she's still far too young and impressionable. Innocent beyond measure. She's got the kindest heart and purest soul. Too good for me. I have nothing to offer her.

So why do those bright green eyes haunt me when I close mine? It's then that I see all of her: those lean, sun-kissed legs, those curves men would spill blood over just to sin at her altar.

She's never realized the effect she has on men, though. She was always shy, and her cheeks would turn pink every time I looked at her. I realize it's because she had feelings for me.

Now I'm the one hiding my feelings for her.

My Eriu.

A temptation far too enticing.

One taste, and I'd forever be hers.

So I have to keep my distance. Make her think that nothing can come of our mutual attraction. We are of different worlds. We always will be.

I'd never simply fool around with her, either. She's far too special for that. And I'd also never disrespect her father by suggesting I take his daughter's hand. Someone like me would never be good enough.

I have too much respect for the Quinns. Patrick has done a lot for me. Helped me start over after my brother, Keegan, was killed. Recruited me to become an enforcer for the family.

It's the only thing I've lived and breathed until she came along. Until her father asked me to be her bodyguard when she was only thirteen.

After that, I swore to give up my life for hers. I vowed to protect that girl with everything I had, and I always will.

I'd die behind these prison bars if it meant she could be safe. If she could shine her light on the world like I never will.

I knew I needed to protect her. It's one thing I couldn't do for my brother. It's why he died. Even while I thought I was doing what I had to do to protect him, it still wasn't enough.

Francis Palmer was the leader of the gang I worked for before I joined the Quinns. The one I betrayed. And the one who killed my brother.

Keegan had nothing to do with the Palmers. He was just a way to get to me. To punish me for what I did.

My brother haunts me when I sleep. Accuses me of killing him. And he'd be right. I might as well have held the knife to his throat.

His last few moments of life constantly play in my mind. No matter how much I try, I can't ever escape that day.

And I never will.

"Come on, Francis, just let him go."

Two of his men hold me back, while another points a gun at my head.

His people are everywhere, surrounding me across the acres of land he owns. I could fight off the ones holding me, but I know Francis would instantly kill Keegan if I tried.

Francis tilts up his mouth, his eyes narrowing, a sharp blade against my brother's Adam's apple.

Keegan trembles, tears rolling down his cheeks.

Feck! How will I get him out of this?

I don't know what the hell to do!

Think, you arsehole, think!

"You thought you could double-cross me and live to tell about it?" Francis laughs coldly. "After I kill you and your addict of a brother, I'm gonna fly to Ireland and personally cut out your parents' hearts. It's too bad you won't see me do it."

"Don't do this! I swear, I won't say any more shite to them. I'll say I lied. Please, just let him go!" I hate begging this feck, but for my brother—my blood—I'll do anything.

My mother was right. She said I'd kill him one day. If he dies and she finds out…

Pain shoots through my chest. This will kill my parents. I can't allow it to happen.

"Do you think I"d ever trust you again?" He drills me with a sharp look. "If you don't kill a rat and teach the other rats where not to shit, they'll never learn their lesson."

Keegan's eyes connect with mine, slicing with fear, his body continuing to tremble.

I'm sorry, I mouth, heaviness weaving through my chest.

I can't lose my baby brother.

This is all on me. I got sloppy. I let them find Keegan.

I was always careful. Never met up with him unless it was at our secret spot in the park at night. He knew I worked for unsavory people, and I knew he was selling crack. I tried to stop him, but then he got hooked on it. I attempted to get him help, even though I knew he had fallen beyond anything I could do.

But still I had to try. He was family. You don't give up on family.

So when he called me one day, saying someone was trying to kill him, I came running. But Francis's people were following me. I knew there was a chance they were. But I took the risk anyway. I couldn't let Keegan die.

I did get him out of trouble, but we landed in a whole new one.

"P-please, I don't w-wanna d-die!" Keegan cries.

"Hush, hush." Francis gently slaps his cheek. "There's no point in wasting your voice. You will die today either way."

A sob shakes through Keegan's body.

"It's all your brother's fault. If he'd been loyal, we wouldn't be here. Isn't that right?" He glares squarely at me.

"I didn't have a choice." I know I won't convince him of that, yet still I try.

"We all have a choice, and you made yours. Now you get to live with it."

"Please, Palmer. Just kill me. This isn't his fault!"

"I know." He holds the edge of the knife to the side of my brother's throat. "It's yours."

It's over in a second. One slice to Keegan's carotid, and I'm watching my brother die.

I let out a guttural scream while his life slowly and painfully slips away.

"No!" I headbutt one of the men and kick the other, then rush to my brother's limp body, his blood seeping like a slow-moving river. "You feckin' son of a bitch!"

Keegan drops to the ground, grabbing his throat, fingers covered in crimson, his eyes wide and filled with equal parts shock, fear, and goodbye.

That part hurts the worst. I'll never see him again.

"I'm so feckin' sorry." I grip the back of my head.

He struggles to say something back, but all that comes out is a grumbling strangle as the blood chokes him.

"It's okay," I whisper, trying to keep it together.

He's dying right in front of me and there's nothing I can do about it. Nothing to stop this except hold him in his last few moments.

"I've got you. I'm not letting go." My voice breaks. "It's okay. Don't fight it."

I blink back my own anguish. And then his body sags, and in seconds, he's dead.

Gone.

Forever.

"Feck!" Heaving, my gaze filled with rage, I stare up at a grinning Francis, who points his weapon at my head.

"Before I kill you, there's one other thing I want you to do for me." He wipes the blade over his shirt, my brother's blood penetrating the white cotton.

"Go to hell! I'm done doing anything for you," I spit through clenched teeth, my pulse slamming in my ears.

"Fine. The men will cut your brother's body into a thousand tiny pieces for the fish. Or…we can bury him."

"You son of a bitch!"

He chuckles. "The only condition is we bury him here, on my land."

"No way!" I clutch my brother tighter. "I'm taking his body with me."

Francis laughs, the crinkling around his dark eyes deepening before his face grows enraged. "This is where he will be buried, so you'll know that I have him forever."

More men surround us, cocking their weapons at me. A good ten of them.

"Get up." He hands the knife to one of his men. "Better start digging before it gets dark. Maybe if you're lucky, I'll even bury you together."

With a roar, I slam a fist against the wall, but I barely feel the pain. I hate remembering that day, hate seeing him die right before my eyes.

My association with the Palmers destroyed my brother, and if I'm not careful, it'll destroy Eriu too.

After I dug his grave, they threw his body inside like cattle. They were gonna kill me too, but help finally arrived. The rival gang owed me a favor. If they'd only shown up on time, maybe my brother would be alive today.

We killed some in the Palmer crew and they killed some on our side before Francis and his sons ran off. I wanted to find them. I tried. But I couldn't, so I left that life.

Until Patrick came calling. He knew exactly who I was.

Back in Ireland, when I was fourteen, I fell in with a bad crowd who did work for some gangs. That's how it started. Can't tell you why. Maybe I liked the attention, the respect. Maybe I was just a savage.

I had my hands in everything. Roughed up the boys who couldn't pay their debts. Killed my first man at fifteen. I had a reputation. The neck-breaker. When they saw me coming, they'd run the other way. That hasn't changed much.

When I decided to come to the States, my parents refused to come with me, but my brother followed me. I wish he hadn't.

We landed in California, and it didn't take long for me to be recruited by the Palmer gang, a bunch of thieves who would go after museums carrying high-priced items. They were skilled, and I liked my time with them.

Until my allegiances changed. Until my brother paid the ultimate price. And that was when my parents turned away from me completely.

My parents knew I had to be involved in what happened to him, and they hated me for it. My baby brother had his problems with drugs, but he was a good man. Nothing like me.

When I had a chance to save him, I did in the only way I knew how. But it cost us both everything. My brother was dead at twenty-one, only two years younger than me. I wanted more for him. More than I had. But that didn't quite work out.

It's been twelve years, and the Palmer gang hasn't found me. Maybe they've given up. Too much time has passed for them to still look for me. Then again, revenge has no expiration date.

They may still want blood for what I did to protect my brother. For everything I took from them.

They never knew my real name, though. They never knew Devlin. They knew me as Scott.

But they could still find me. I can't ever let my guard down. If it was me, I wouldn't stop until every last one of them was dead.

When they come, I will be ready. I will end this once and for all.

I've looked for them over the years, but they've been quiet. Too quiet. Part of me hopes they're all dead, but I'm sure they're still alive somewhere, hating the very thought of me.

I can't let this touch Eriu. I can't let her die like my brother did. She has too much life inside her to let someone like me take it away.

I must do right by her. I must keep her away from me. I must not entertain her wild fantasies of us. They're nothing but fairy tales.

Yet she comes to visit every month like clockwork, and I refuse her every time. How she still comes, how she still wants to be near me after I had failed her so gravely, is something I'll never understand.

It was my job to protect her, even from herself. I should never have drunk the glass of water she gave me. I should've been smarter than that. But I did. And she drugged me, then snuck out with her friend to go to that club.

That changed everything. That landed me in prison. That has prevented me from keeping an eye on her.

I have all the letters she's been writing, but I only ever wrote her back twice. Once after the first letter, then to tell her to stop writing when she confessed her feelings for me. Told her that her fascination with me was one-sided.

But that's nothing but a lie.

My hunger for her grows the longer I'm in here, the longer I'm away from her.

I remove the folded piece of paper from the envelope and clutch it in my hands. These letters are enough to kill me, to make me want to hold her in my arms or spank the holy hell out of her for doing what she did.

If I hadn't been tempted by her, none of this would've happened. But we got to talking, and I missed it when she slipped something into my water that knocked me out cold. If I ever get out of here, it'll never happen again.

I brought shame to my name and my job. Patrick is never going to want me back. I should be used to disappointing people by now. I did a lot of that with my own family.

It was a true honor to be assigned to the boss's daughter. Many wanted the position. But I failed to carry out my duty, and I can't do anything to take it back.

If I get out and Patrick doesn't reinstate me as her bodyguard, I'll still watch her. She'll always be mine to protect. That'll never change.

I'm lucky Patrick pays my attorney bills. He didn't have to. I could afford twenty with what he's paid me, but the gesture means there's a part of him that can forgive me like my parents never could.

I settle on the lower bunk. It's nice being alone. My cellmate was stabbed and is still in the hospital.

As soon as I glance down at the letter and see her handwriting, my breaths grow shallower.

Her emerald-green eyes appear as though before me, and I start to read her prose, unable to stop my pulse from drumming.

Dear Devlin,

I keep writing, yet you never write back. I know you're getting my letters. I won't stop writing them. Not until the moment you're free.

I know you said you forgive me, but I don't forgive myself. And every day you're gone, I play that night in my head, wishing I'd done things differently.

I regret it. What I did to you was wrong. I'm not making excuses, but you know how strict my father has always been with me. I was always treated differently than all my siblings. And I hated that. Still do. I'm eighteen, and still nothing changes. I'm forever a child in his eyes.

It's like he's waiting to marry me off. And the day he announces that I've been arranged to marry someone is the day I die.

I know it's coming soon. I don't want to marry someone my father chooses, but I can't tell him that. He sees me as a girl who obeys him, who does what's best for the family. But I don't want to, Devlin. I want to be free. Want to do what I want. And what I want, what I've always wanted, is you.

Why can't you be the one to marry me? My father adores you. He still does. I know he does. He would accept you as my husband, even with the age difference. He knows you'd lay down your life for me. That's what he wants in the end. Someone to protect me. And you've always protected me.

I know you feel something for me too. I'm not imagining it. How long will you spend denying that there's something between us?

Please, Devlin. I need you. I don't want to be anyone else's wife but yours.

Love,

Eriu

My heart bloody well stops beating. With a fingertip, I trace the trinity knot she has drawn with utter perfection. She signs her name next to it in every letter, like she's tellin' me that we're bound for eternity.

She's right about one thing. She was always treated differently.

But that's because she's innocent in every sense of the word.

There's more to her, though. Eriu is a woman of many talents, and I long to know everything I can about her. Yet I can't. She's not meant to be mine, no matter how badly I want her to be.

With a roar, I crumple the letter in my palm.

The thought of her marrying someone else sends me over the edge.

If I was a good man, worthy of her, maybe I would ask her father for her hand.

But I'm not that man, and the sooner she comes to terms with that, the better it'll be for the both of us.