Chapter 35

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

ASHLEY

Jessa-Mae and Karla won't stop calling me. The constant calling is driving me crazy. From the three voice messages I did listen to, I know that Scott has called them. Between the three of them, no matter what I said to Jessa or sent as a text, they've decided that something is wrong and have threatened to travel to Whitstone to talk to me face-to-face. I send Jessa-Mae and Karla one last message in our group chat, asking them not to come to see me, or bring Scott, and that I'd be in touch soon, and then turn off my cell.

Hopefully that'll be enough to keep them away, but knowing my friends as I do, it wouldn't surprise me to find them on the doorstep in the next twenty-four hours. I'll have to warn Zain, or he'll think I arranged for them to visit on purpose.

He's made his intentions clear. He is marrying me to punish me for witnessing him standing over the body of my brother, for believing with every part of me that he was responsible for the deaths. I'm not sure what his plans are for once we're married, but I know that if he thinks I've told them anything, he'll turn his attention to my mom .

Until I know exactly what information he thinks he has on her, I can't push him too far. But on the other hand, if he thinks I'm going to just roll over and do everything he wants without any argument, then he's in for a surprise. He might have initially caught me off-guard, but I didn't get to be twenty-seven years old by being a pushover, and not looking after myself.

Yes, I signed a contract that gave him control over my life, but that doesn't mean he can break the law or hurt me.

Not knowing what he's planning to do over the next fourteen months fills me with anxiety, I can't deny that, but the logical part of my brain is insistent that he's not going to do anything that would result in the police coming to his door. I doubt that he's going to risk that kind of attention. And I don't think he wants to go back to prison.

Maybe he's just angry. Maybe if I give him what he wants, he'll realize that forcing me to marry him won't make him feel any better. It won't give him back the years he's lost.

Maybe I shouldn't have come back to Whitstone.

Would that have changed anything? He already admitted that he planned to find you. You'd still be in the same situation. His original plan might have been even worse. He said he'd intended to see your mom behind bars. At least this way, she's not going to suffer from that.

And if I can find a way to protect my mom, then I'll be able to get out of this marriage. He can't watch me all the time. I'm sure I will be able to find something .

And it's that faint hope I cling to while I get ready to meet him again that evening .

Mom arrives home around five. To distract myself from the evening ahead, I've prepared dinner for us both. Zain didn't say anything about going out for food, and I refuse to starve myself just in case he's made plans he hasn't told me about.

We sit at the kitchen table to eat, and I push the food around my plate while I try to figure out a way to tell her that I'm seeing Zain again. She doesn't notice my silence as she chatters about her day. She owns an antique shop in town with her friend. I'm not sure it actually makes a profit, but they seem to enjoy it, and I'm pretty confident it's just a place where she, and her friends can go without being bothered by anyone else.

"Ashley … Ashley! "

My gaze snaps up to where she's staring at me from across the table.

"Did you hear a word I said?"

"Yes?"

She snorts. "I've been talking solidly for the past five minutes and you have barely even grunted in reply."

"I'm sorry."

"What's wrong? You've been in your own world since I got home."

I poke at the chicken breast on my plate, then give up the pretense that I'm eating and drop the fork to the table.

"I'm going out with Zain tonight."

" Again ? Surely you can't have that much to say to each other."

"Just for a walk. I think … I think he's having trouble ac climating to being out of prison." It's the first excuse I can think of, but the second it leaves my lips, I wonder if it's true.

Is he having trouble adjusting? Is life outside of prison a struggle for him? If it is, he hasn't shown it during the time he's spent with me. Will I see it more when we're married?

Oh god … we're getting married .

"Ashley, are you okay? You've lost all color in your cheeks."

"I'm fine. I just haven't been sleeping very well, that's all."

"Maybe you should cancel tonight and have an early night, then? I'm sure he'll understand. He has his family around him."

I shake my head. "No, no. I like spending time with him."

Does she believe me? I don't even sound like I'm telling the truth.

She must do, because she doesn't question it.

"Alright, as long as you're not spending time with him out of some misguided sense of guilt."

"I'm not. I promise." I pick up my plate and stand. "I'm going to take a shower and get ready to go out. What are your plans for tonight?"

"I have no plans tonight. I'm going to sit in front of the television and catch up on my shows."

I empty my plate into the trash, then rinse it under the faucet before placing it in the dishwasher.

"Then I'll leave you in peace." I smile over my shoulder at her. "I have the spare key, so don't worry about waiting up for me."

Especially as I know I won't be coming home. I don't want to tell her that as it'll raise too many questions .

"Ashley?" Her voice stops me as I reach the door, and I turn. "If something is going on, I want you to know that you can tell me."

"Why would you think something is going on?"

"I know we're not as close as we used to be, but I'm still your mother. And I know when something is bothering you."

"It's nothing." I force a smile. "I'm fine, really."