Chapter Seventeen

Lyrical

I 'm annoyed because I haven't had sex in a week, thanks to Snow. I'm annoyed because he won't return any of my calls or text messages, and I know he read my messages because it says Seen at the bottom of the screen. I hate this cold and hot behavior.

Is our marriage going to be like this? I hope not. Well, I want the sex to be like how we have sex, but not his behavior. I told Lilac and Winter to meet me at a bar, because I need a girls' night out and I don't want to be sitting at home waiting for him. He's not my real fiancé and I'm not in love with him like I used to be.

We sit at the table, and I allow myself to have a few drinks as I laugh so hard my belly aches.

Honestly, I needed this.

I need to let my hair down and enjoy life while I can because I don't know how my marriage life is going to be.

"I have something to ask you," Winter says, before taking a long sip of her beer. "Can I be your maid of honor or a bridesmaid?" She looks at me sheepishly.

I have been putting off planning my wedding with my mother because I'm dreading it. I don't want to be married just because our family forced it upon us.

"Of course you can be my bridesmaid, and you too, Lilac."

They both grin from ear to ear.

"So, what colors are we supposed to wear?" Winter asks, finishing the last bit of her beer.

"I don't know but once my mother lets me know, I'll shoot you both a text."

She's more excited about my wedding than I am.

"How are things with you and Irvin?" I ask Lilac, changing the subject and taking the spotlight off me.

She shrugs her shoulders. "I slept with him a few times, and that was it. He's in an arranged marriage, so I ended things between us. I'm not going to keep giving myself to a guy who belongs to someone else."

Pain etches on her face, and her smile deflates.

Whistling comes from the front entrance, and I glance at Savannah. She strides in, wearing a tight polka-dot dress along with matching Vans. Her best friend, Tanya, is right behind her, wearing a snarl on her face. I never liked her. She always had an issue with me for no damn reason. One time we almost got into a fistfight because she thought I was sleeping with Snow, though now I am.

She spots me, before making her way to our table. "Well, well, well. What do we have here? The girl who begged my ex-boyfriend to be his slut. You know the only reason why he's marrying you is because he had no choice. If he could, he would have chosen me to marry him."

I roll my eyes, because both of us know that's not true, though her father is a member of the American Billionaire Club and owns a tech company similar to Apple and Samsung. "I don't want Snow. If you want him, he's all yours."

I want to believe my own lies, but I do care if he's fucking her. Is that why he's been ignoring my text messages? Is that why he went ghost on me? I try to wrap my head around why he hasn't contacted me. I even stalked his social media, but he hasn't posted any updates since he left.

"No. It'll be more fun for me to be his side piece and fuck him so when he comes home to you, you would wonder if he has been with me." She smirks.

I get up from the table, trying to move around her, but she blocks my path. She's a few inches shorter than me.

"Savannah. I'm warning you. Step back."

Anger clouds her eyes. "Honestly, I don't understand what he sees in you, you're not all that pretty."

Her insult doesn't bother me. I want to get away from her before I do something like smash a bottle at her head. Savannah thinks because I avoid her, I'm scared of her. But I'm not. I try to avoid conflict as much as possible because I know how my anger can get.

"No wonder Snow stopped fucking you. Your personality is boring, and you stink of desperation," I snap.

"I fucked him the last few days, that's why you haven't heard from him."

The hell? How does she know I haven't heard from him? She reads my face like a map, giggling at me.

"You didn't know he's in New York City, working with his father? My father and I were there. Snow rented a hotel for us, and he fucked me so good, I'm still sore."

"Whatever, Savannah." I finally move away from her and head over to the bar. Lilac and Winter follow me and sit on either side of me.

"I think Savannah is lying and jealous because you're marrying Snow," Lilac says, then she orders herself another beer.

"What a bitch. If you need help kicking her ass, let me know. I'll help you," Winter murmurs, resting her elbow on the bartop.

They continue to speak, but I tune them out.

Why would she lie?

I grab my phone from my pocket and swipe across.

I don't have any of Snow's friends' numbers.

I tap the IG icon, and my newsfeed pops up. I need answers, and the only person who will give them to me is Keanu. Jameson seems like the type who would snitch on me to Snow, and Irvin and Snow hate each other. I type in Keanu's name, and it pops up. There is a blue button that says Follow Back . I had no idea he was following me. He has over a million followers and he's only following fifty-three people. I shoot him a message. Hopefully, he'll respond.

Me: Was Savannah with Snow in New York City?

KeanutheMG: Yes, her family had dinner with him and his father.

I glance at Savannah, and she gives me a mischievous look back. Why would she make this up? She knows I can ask Snow and he will be honest.

So why lie?

I shake my head. She's not lying, she has to be telling the truth. I don't like the fact that she's gloating in my face about sleeping with my fiancé, and I shouldn't be mad because Snow isn't mine. He's forcing me to have sex with him, and I enjoy it, and that's all I am to him—a sex toy for him to sleep with anytime. He's using my sex journal against me.

I don't mean shit to Snow. So why the fuck do I care if he was with her?

If Savannah is going to be the side piece in our marriage, then I'm not going to be a wife waiting for him by the door. I'm better than that; I deserve better. So, I'm going to find a guy to fuck.

I search the bar and I spot a group of men sitting a few feet away. I spot a blond-haired man with gorgeous blue eyes, wearing an expensive suit. He looks at least ten years older than me.

"Oh, he's yummy," Winter says, following my line of sight.

I get up from the bar, dust off my blouse, and put on a fake smile.

Lilac cocks her eyebrow. "Where are you going?"

I shrug. "To get laid."

"I don't think that's a go—"

I wave my hand, cutting Lilac off. "I'm not in a relationship with Snow. Our marriage is strictly business."

Without another word, I leave my friends and squeeze between two guys, keeping my eyes glued to the blond man.

He looks me up and down, licking his lips. "What are you looking for, sweetheart?"

He's older than I thought, pushing late thirties or early forties. He's old enough to be my father. It's one night, though, and I need the escape. I've never done a one-night stand, so I don't know what to expect.

Once Snow and I are married, I'm going to find me someone to fuck on a regular basis. Since he wants to play games with me, I can play them right back. He can have Savannah's trashy ass, and speaking of the dumb bitch, I glance at her, finding her watching me as she speaks to Tanya.

"Let me buy you a drink," he says.

I shake my head. "I'm not here for the drink, I'm here for you."

His eyes brighten and he grins from ear to ear. "You want to go back to my hotel?"

The guy puts me on his lap, tilting my chin to look up at him, and I can feel his erection wedged between my ass cheeks. The way he asks me to go back to his hotel turns me off. I like to be owned and controlled, the way Snow does it. I'd like him to force me to do things. I don't want a gentleman; I want a man to take from me, like Snow does. Now, I'm all of a sudden losing interest in the blond guy. He seems like a boring lay, someone who only likes missionary.

My phone rings and it's Snow, but I hit the Decline button since he hasn't been answering any of my phone calls the past week. I'm not going to answer his either. It's not fair that he gets to treat me like shit, and I'm supposed to just take it. He did say he was going to make Savannah his side piece and I'm going to have to watch, but let's see how he feels when those tables are turned.

He sends me a message.

Snow: Answer your phone.

Snow: Answer the fucking phone, Lyrical!

Snow: I'm going to have fun punishing you.

I can't believe he's fucking her behind my back. He calls my phone again, so I turn my phone completely off.

The blond man grips my hips, trying to dry hump me. I ease my way off his lap and sit in the empty chair next to him.

"Easy, boy, I'm trying to get to know you better." I sigh. "What is your name?"

"Melvin, and yours?"

"Lyrical. I go to college."

"What for?"

"Art?"

Thirty minutes later, I watch Snow storm toward me, and my heart freezes in my chest.

I'm assuming Savannah told him.

Of course she did.

I hope Snow kills her one day.

Stupid bitch.

I press my lips against the blond guy's. They're dry and chapped, but I don't care. I'm using him to get back at Snow.

"I've got to go," I say, then I head out of the back doors. I see Snow marching after me from the corner of my eye, so I head down the street, and he picks up his pace.

My panties are wet from him chasing me, stalking me like I'm his prey.

I rush back to the campus iron gates, since it's walking distance from the bar. The wind cools my face, and the lit apartments brighten up the dark sky. I head straight to the green forest, my heels sinking into the muddy ground, slowing me down. Adrenaline spreads in my veins and my heart damn near jumps in my chest.

He catches up to me and yanks me by my hair, pure rage darkening his pupils, but I don't care.

I try to fight him off, but he grips my hair harder, wrapping it around his wrist and causing my scalp to burn like fire, yet the act turns me on. I let out a squeal, then a moan.

"What was that shit back there? You sat down on that motherfucker's lap. Letting him touch what's mine. Are you out of your rabid-ass mind?!"

I've never seen him filled with so much rage. I've never seen him so pissed. His anger makes me crave him. Makes me want him more.

"I saw Savannah, and she told me about how you fucked her in New York City. That's why you didn't show your face. You asshole! You left without a word and kept ignoring me for days, and now you want to pop up out of nowhere and mark some claim over me? Motherfucker. Go to hell!"

He leans down, grips my chin, digging his black-painted nails into my skin. "I wasn't with Savannah. I had to help my father at the Billionaire Club. Savannah was there along with her father, and they were trying to convince me to marry her instead, and I told them no. Because I told them I wanted you."

"Bullshit, and you know it. Why were you ignoring my calls then?"

"I don't have to give you an excuse about what I fucking do. You're nothing but a toy to me."

I don't know why his words sting. I don't know why I believed I could be more to him than a piece of ass.

"Fuck you, Revi. Fuck you."

He pushes me down to the ground, pulls up my leather skirt, and I try to get up from the ground, but it's no use. He hovers over me, pressing his body against mine, and I feel his hard muscles under his dress shirt.

No point in fighting, he's too strong for me. This is what I wanted, right? To get him upset. To hurt him. But I realize I don't mean anything to him, and I've been playing myself. I was beginning to have a little hope that he sees me as more than a blow-up sex doll.

He keeps his palm on my lower back so I can't run, then I hear him unzip his pants.

"You dare kiss another man. You need to be shown who you belong to."

"Sto—"

"Shut the fuck up," he says, sliding my panties to the side before shoving his length inside of me, stretching me good. I'm snug around him as he thrusts inside of me.

Fucking me like a madman.

I taste dirt in my mouth as the side of my face is mashed to the ground, getting mud in my dark hair. My eyes roll to the back of my head. This is what I wanted, the adrenaline, the rush of blood going to my core, my nipples hardening. I'm leaking around him and the sound of him fucking me hard fills the night air. I try to look around to see if someone is watching us, but then again, no one comes back this way to campus.

"You wanted my attention? Well, you got it, Lyrical."

He grips my hips harder, fucking me senseless, then he pulls out and I feel warm cum on my back. He flips me over, slides back inside of me, then wraps his hand around my neck, squeezing tight, but not enough to cut off my airway. I feel the cold dirt on my back and my ass throbs.

"Someone might see us."

"I don't give a shit."

He pounds into me more, and I scream at the top of my lungs.

"I was going insane thinking about you. I missed you while I was gone." His words melt my heart. He fucks me like he misses me. He fucks me like he wants me. And I don't know why I care about him. He has been treating me like shit, taking his anger out on me, and yet, I care.

I hate that I fucking caring.

Once he empties his seed inside of me, he sits up on his knees, tucking himself in his pants.

"What about me? Aren't you going to make me come?"

He pulls me up to my feet, and I yank down my skirt.

"No. You don't deserve to. That's your punishment." He sighs. "Now, I've got to clean up the mess you made. The guy whose lap you were sitting on is known to prey on younger women. He's got his eyes set on you."

"What are you going to do?"

"Don't worry about it."

I dust myself off and I head toward my old apartment. I told Lilac I was spending the night at her place.

He grabs me by the wrist. "Where are you going?"

"I'm spending the night with Lilac."

"No, you're going home with me."

"No. I need space."

"Hi, my name is Space," Snow mocks.

"Snow, please let me go."

"I said no . Take a rain check, or I'll punish you again."

"You can control me in the bedroom, Snow. But outside of our sexual relationship, you don't control my life."

He cups both of my cheeks, stroking my lips with his thumbs. "That's where you're wrong. The seven-point-five-million-dollar engagement ring I bought you shows I do control you. You're mine." He looks down at my finger, frowning. "You're going to wear your ring. People need to know you're taken."

"I'll never wear your ring, Revi."

He might control most of my life, but he won't control what I wear. I will never be his, and I'll never admit to anyone that I'm his. He can fuck me however he wants, do anything he wants to me and my body, but I have some power here.

He strokes the side of my face and I suck in a breath. "You'll learn that I own every inch of you."

He does—my body—but never my heart.

I'll never give him my heart.

The next morning, I wake up and look to my left to find Snow is not in bed. He must have gone to class, thank God, because last night he fucked the shit out me until we were both out of breath. I stretch my legs out and glance out the window. The sun reflects off the crystal-clear water. Yawning, I roll out of bed and head to my vanity.

There is a small box sitting on the table.

Crinkling my nose, I remove the lid and scream at the top of my lungs. There is a pair of bloody lips sitting on a small pillow with a note written in blood. No doubt, it's Snow's handwriting.

This is what happens when you allow a man to touch you. If you don't want me to leave a trail of dead bodies, then I suggest you don't let another man touch you ever again.