Chapter Thirteen

2:12AM

Meggie groaned, so tired she could barely keep her eyes open. It had taken hours to clean up the sugar from Johnnie’s room. Or his old room. He needed rest, not ants crawling over his entire body because her sons sought vengeance.

And she didn’t even want to think about the glue.

Honestly, where did her boys even come up with these ideas?

The throb in her cheek had lessened to a dull ache. Makeup covered the bruising and did a credible job of masking the slight swelling.

She, Christopher, and the kids had gotten home about a half hour ago. Meggie raced through her shower, knowing they would have to leave by 6:30 to get to the hospital in time to see Jo before she was wheeled to the OR.

She’d need another one anyway to wake up. Instead of washing her hair, she’d braided it and pinned it up, avoiding standing directly under the spray. She’d deal with her hair later, too.

She was waiting for Christopher. He’d said he needed to talk to CJ and Diesel, then lock up.

Usually, by now, he would’ve been up, but Meggie got the distinct impression he was avoiding her. She thought about just going to sleep and dealing with whatever after her baby’s surgery. She just felt so discombobulated. It was useless to ruminate on her life or her marriage. The past was over and the future hadn’t arrived. What mattered most was now. And what she could live with or deal with.

The door opened, and she listened as her husband walked into the room. She could pick out each of his movements, understand the meaning of every change of breath he made.

She had to get Torie out of her head. There were so many other things that took priority. Allowing Torie one second of her thoughts was too long.

Meggie’s phone alerted her to an incoming message, and she stiffened. She hated that she no longer rushed to read her texts, fearing Torie would send more vitriol or threats.

It chimed again.

Sighing, Meggie lifted herself up on an elbow, leaned over and grabbed her phone. It was from Grant. Probably one of his silly jokes. She’d read it in the car on the way to the hospital. She sat it back on the nightstand and relaxed against her pillow again.

“I thought you would be sleepin’, baby.”

She stared at the ceiling, thrown into shadow because of the dim nightlight. “I waited up for you.”

Christopher slid between the covers and laid next to her. Neither of them moved toward each other. He wore pajama bottoms and she wore a nightgown, pieces of clothing always at hand for the morning time and emergencies, but rarely on their bodies right after they turned in.

He cleared his throat. “Those three little motherfuckers gonna end up in solitary confinement in a super max.”

“Right?” She ignored how that thought crushed her. At least they’d be alive. “They’re very creative.”

“Yup.” He chuckled. “Course, they’ll get smarter as they learn and grow.”

“Mmmm.” She searched for words. “In reality, I think Axel’s going to be an attorney.”

His laughter came more naturally. “Baby, you right. All that little motherfucker do is talk about the fuckin’ law.”

Silence fell around them again. In a day filled with messiness, Rule popped into her head. Things were awkward enough between her and Christopher, but they needed to discuss Rule. “You need to talk to Rule as soon as possible.”

“We need to commit Rule as soon as possible,” Christopher retorted. “He not gettin’ better, Megan. If anything, he gettin’ fuckin’ worse.”

She sighed. “I know. I’ll talk to Zoann and see if she knows anyone.” Thoughts of Molly and the plans they had made to help her crossed her mind. “I hope he doesn’t have to go out-of-state.”

“He gotta go wherever he can get the most help, baby. Maybe, Bailey might—”

“Absolutely not. Her treatment of CJ crushed him. I will not have her involved in another one of my son’s lives. No.”

“You right, baby. You right.”

She was so tired right now that she could barely think straight. More than anything, she wanted Christopher to hold her.

“The first years of our marriage were very rocky,” she said quietly.

“I know, Megan. All this came out the blue. It’s just fuckin’ killin’ me to know how much you hatin’ on me.”

“The Bash situation didn’t come out of the blue, Christopher,” she said quietly. “Johnnie just hid it from you. If he wasn’t a moron, I’d say he might’ve been right.”

He heaved in a breath and Meggie flinched.

“You’re taking that the wrong way.”

“Am I? Not only ain’t you got faith in me as your husband, but as Outlaw too.”

“All Johnnie does is block you or complain. He should handle crises and let him see how valuable you are, but he’s an idiot.” She gripped the covers, still focused on the ceiling. “You aren’t the biker who makes time for his family. You’re the family man who fits in time for his club. There are vast differences in those scenarios.”

“I don’t like to think about Kendall targetin’ you. No matter the fuckin’ reason.”

“That plan is the least of our problems right now, Christopher.”

“Everything will work itself out, Megan. It always do.”

His complete lack of awareness of why she felt so alone testified to the depth of his own misery.

“I’m going to talk to Jordan about Rebel.”

He went rigid.

“If you have a problem, tell me now,” she said quietly.

“Will that change your mind?”

She’d had time to consider most of what happened over this long day. Christopher might have conceded during their earlier discussion, but Meggie knew him. “I know Reb’s your little girl, but she’s mine, too. I just want her safe. It’s always been very easy for me to get pregnant. What would’ve happened if she’d had sex with one of those jerks without protection?”

“She was just ten years old.”

“Almost five years ago. In a matter of weeks, she’ll be right in the middle. Five years from ten and five years from twenty.”

“You sure she need birth control?”

Meggie might not have been sure about much else right now, but she was positive about that. “Absolutely. A thousand percent.”

“Fuck.”

“I don’t think she’ll run out and have sex. But suppose an enemy gets their hands on her? What then? I’ve been lucky. Zoann? Not at all.”

Christopher swallowed.

“I’m asking you not to do anything to undermine me where Rebel is concerned. I know you don’t agree with either the birth control or her going on dates. Normally, your schemes, and my inevitable discover of them, are funny.”

“You still get pissed.”

“I can’t help it.” She smiled. “You come up with very elaborate plans.”

“What’s the difference now?”

“It’s all just too much.”

“If it’s about Torie—”

“Will anything I say change your mind?” she demanded, flinging his words at him.

“Megan—”

“We’ve gone around and around about her. Just drop it.”

“There’s a rumor—”

“I’ve heard the rumor, Christopher.”

Nyx had been more than happy to discuss it in a theatrical whisper that thoroughly infuriated Rebel. Meggie was only thankful there were no knives within reach. Still, seeing the club girl, hearing her, reminded Meggie of Torie. The woman was just inescapable.

“When you say it’s too much—”

“Torie.” She spat her name, hating to say it as much as she hated her. “Nyx. Our marriage. Jo. Rebel. Mattie. Eric and Billy. CJ. CJ and Harley. CJ and Molly. My hysterectomy. Johnnie. Bash. You. Still not resting and eating as properly as you should. Rule. Our boys’ introduction into the club.”

“Megan—”

“There’s nothing you can say. It was so sudden and unexpected. The reason they became bikers-in-training. It’s done.”

“You not cryin’.”

“What good are tears?”

He moved, turned to his side. Even though she was still staring at the ceiling, she felt his gaze on her. Hot and searching, it burned into her.

“Your tears remind me.”

“Of?”

He ran a finger down the side of her cheek. “Of kindness. Fairness. What you expect. With you like this, I ain’t too sure what to do and believe.”

“You’ll figure it out.”

Soft laughter rumbled from him, and fire shot through her.

“Fuck, baby, you still fuckin’ drive my ass, and you ain’t makin’ no fuckin’ apologies about that.”

She sniffed.

“Kids fuck up a marriage as much as finances. At the moment, only Gunner not a fuckin’ problem and creatin’ issues. Diesel married that cunt. Rule a fuckin’ psycho cunt. Rebel a step away from killin’ a bunch of motherfuckers and she don’t wanna be a little girl no more. Ryder, Ransom, and Axel doin’ everything except buildin’ bombs and blowin’ motherfuckers up. Jo…Jo still not home. And CJ wanna drop outta school. He mopin’ over Harley and Molly.”

Meggie turned her head. The shadow also covered his beautiful face. “CJ isn’t a problem. How could you even think that?”

Christopher snickered, pulled her into his arms, and kissed her. “And you say the lil’ motherfucker not your fuckin’ favorite.”

“He was the last one you mentioned,” she argued.

“My point ain’t about our boy, baby. It’s about what you said. It’s a fuckin’ lot if we wasn’t dealin’ with you bein’ so sick.”

Sighing, she nodded. She couldn’t hold herself apart from her husband when he was so close and his scent surrounded her. For now, she could let it go. Be his wife and he her husband. Problems awaited just beyond their door, which she’d have to face in just a couple of hours.

She melted, and he dipped his head, brushing his lips over hers. Pulling back, he captured her gaze. She couldn’t see him very well, but she felt his overwhelming affection.

Tension bloomed in her, heightening her anticipation. His mouth finally touched hers in a tender caress. Each reverent kiss gave meaning to every time he’d ever told her how much he loved her. Every glance, both secret and open.

She wrapped her arms around his powerful neck, his mouth mastering hers in a seamless dance. Their lips molded perfectly, made for each other. Just as they were. The synchronicity of their kiss mirrored the beat of their hearts.

In that time and place, it reaffirmed their bond. Time stood still and the outside world faded away, their love echoing with every touch and every sigh.

A moan escaped her. Christopher responded, groaned, changing the tempo of his mouth, turning the sweetness of the moment into one of pure passion, conveying their mutual longing and shared desire.

Electric currents roared through her blood, igniting a fire within her. Their bonds were frayed but not broken.

Never broken. She loved him too much. Adored him. Her fingers tangled in his silky hair, and she tipped her head back, exposing her throat to his lips.

His big hands roamed over her body, sliding her silk nightgown up, his fingers leaving a trail of fire. Deepening the kiss, he slipped his hand between her legs, tickled her bush, and fingered her clit.

Meggie caressed his strong jaw, lost in love, consumed by Christopher. “Beautiful man,” she whispered.

He kissed her again, still stroking her clit. “Beautiful girl,” he murmured.

He pulled away long enough to remove his pajama bottoms, then he moved over her, his mouth more demanding.

“You want your pussy licked.” He licked the pulse point at her neck. “Or my cock filling your cunt?”

Her breath hitched. She wished there was time for both. She could suck his cock, swipe her tongue around the wide head and drive him insane. She almost creamed at the thought. Her pussy was hot, wet, and needy. “Fuck me hard.”

Growling, he guided his cock to her entrance and buried himself so deeply inside her, one swivel of his hips sent her over the edge.

“Fuck, your pussy so fuckin’ good,” he crooned.

Meggie shook, her body open and vulnerable.

He hammered her, rumbling in a very male way with each tilt of her hips and tightening of her pussy walls.

“You take every inch of my big dick, baby.”

“I’m addicted to your long, thick cock,” she panted. “It fucks me so good and makes me come so hard.” She bit his chin. “The only thing I love more than fucking it is sucking it.” Her clit swelled and tightened and her walls slicked.

His strokes quickened, deepened. He brought his hand to her clit again.

Meggie shivered and she dug her nails into his back, his fingers as ruthless and relentless as his cock. “God, god, god,” she chanted, as undone by his fucking as she was by his lovemaking.

To think Torie had known any part of her husband.

To think she was back in their lives.

Hurt and anger rushed through Meggie, and tears did pool in her eyes then. She slapped him, harder than she ever had, so crushed and furious.

He stilled.

“Asshole.” She hit him again, remembering Nyx’s smirk and the perfectly timed whisper of what everyone believed Christopher had done with Torie. “Motherfucker.”

Though he didn’t move off her, he leaned over and turned on her bedside lamp.

Before she could hit him again, he grabbed her hands and pinned them over her head.

“I ain’t did nothin’ with that cunt, Megan.”

She hissed, tears slipping down her cheeks.

He kept her hands pinned above her head and her body pinned by his, still joined. “The way you fuckin’ actin’ ain’t got fuck-all to do with nothin’ but Torie. Cuz shit around here pop off on a fuckin’ dime and you handle it all.”

“Three, five, seven things. But all of this?”

She couldn’t explain it sufficiently, especially about her boys. And Torie.

His cock throbbed inside her. She wanted to push him away and hold him close. Kiss him and kick him.

“Just promise me you won’t lie to me about anything else. No matter what it is. You won’t have the boys lie to me.”

“Megan, you knew all along our boys would join the fuckin’ club. If not all of them, some of them.”

“It was cute!”

“It was never fuckin’ cute!” Offended, he jerked out of her and fell to her side. “What the fuck’s wrong with you? Ain’t nothin’ ever been cute about my fuckin’ club. You make us sound like a bunch of bitches.”

“It was cute that the boys wanted to emulate you.”

“You wanted them to emulate me.”

“They’re your sons. What did you expect me to do? You wanted a legacy.”

“Then we both to fuckin’ blame. Cuz, baby, this the fuckin’ life you fuckin’ chose to live with me.”

“And it’s one I would never give up if it meant not having you.”

The tension in his shoulders eased and his look softened. He still felt annoyed, but he wasn’t panicked.

“But I never liked to think about the other side of you.”

“The killer? That’s me too, Megan. I guess you had to pretend I wasn’t that so you could find the good in me.”

She shook her head. “No, there’s a lot of good in you. I didn’t have to pretend to do anything. But…but…how did Patricia let you go with Daddy when you were so young? How’d she give up being your mother so he could be your president?”

“Fuck, Megan. Ma loved me, but, most of the time, she ain’t gave a good fuck about me. When Big Joe took me in, I think she was fuckin’ glad she ain’t had to look at me every day.”

Meggie frowned. “Why was Zoann so bitter about you not contacting Patricia for a year?” There was a lot of anger when Meggie first arrived at the club.

“It’s so hard to fuckin’ explain cuz I ain’t understandin’ it myfuckinself. Sometimes, it blurs in my fuckin’ head. On one side, Ma love me and want to see me and protect me. On the other side, she just leave me vulnerable to Logan and Elmira and, fuck, anyfuckinbody who wanna fuck with me. There was times when I didn’t know if she hated me or she loved me.”

“I have my own cognitive dissonance with Mama,” she admitted. “On the one hand, she loved me because I was her daughter. On the other hand, she hated me because I was Big Joe’s daughter. I can’t make it make sense. I don’t remember why I always felt so responsible for her.”

As the years passed, what Meggie did remember didn’t always paint Dinah in the best light. Maybe she’d buried all the unkindness and neglect once Dinah married Thomas and he’d begun to abuse her. She didn’t want the woman her mother actually was to be the woman she fought so hard to protect.

“Your mother wasn’t perfect, Christopher, but she wasn’t a would-be killer. Mama tried to stab you. Patricia didn’t have a murderous bone in her body. She was just trying to cope. She loved you so much.”

“Sometimes, I wonder how she started talkin’ to Rack.”

“It was because—”

“I know she was grievin’ Big Joe’s death, but Ma didn’t just go confidin’ in everyfuckinbody. She looked down on the club girls. Fuck, she looked down on the club a lot. Some shit still don’t make no sense about that situation.”

Meggie thought about that awful night and frowned. A point she’d never considered rose in her head. “Why would Rack kill her, but Snake say your mother for my father?”

Christopher nodded. “If Snake killed her, I coulda understood better. Rack, though? He came to dinner and acted like he owned the fuckin’ house, so I know it wasn’t the first time. Logan was a double-crossin’, underhanded assfuck. Ma was his daughter. She had some of his fuckin’ genes. Ain’t no other fuckin’ reason she was fuckin’ Big Joe—maybe, Rack too—and got fuckin’ killed before they even fuckin’ got to us. They woulda wanted me to watch her die.”

Meggie’s mind whirled. Christopher had been thinking a lot about this.

“It don’t often cross my mind,” he said, reading her mind. Her expression must’ve given her away. “Fuck, I try not to think about that shit. None of it.”

She knew why he was thinking about it now. “Kendall and I will deal with Torie,” she reminded him. “Her son will know his mother.”

“Megan—”

“You just focus on Bash and straightening that situation out. If the club votes to sue for peace, then do it. Don’t become a lone wolf and get yourself killed.”

He gave her a half smile. “Even with a bunch of motherfuckers with me, I can get fucked up. Luck of the fuckin’ draw, baby.”

The words turned over in her head. He’d straddled the line between Outlaw and Christopher the entire evening. No matter how he used his words, Outlaw was a brilliant tactician.

She turned to Christopher and placed tiny kisses on his chest. Immediately, he seized control and slanted his mouth over hers. The moment he rolled onto her, she opened her thighs and he sank into her. Their kisses swallowed their mutual sighs.

“I love you,” she whispered.

“I love you more, Megan. You mine and I’m yours. Always and forever.”

“Always and forever.”

Bracing himself above her, he closed his eyes and parted his lips, ecstasy on his face.

“Come in me,” she said, clutching his firm buttocks, encouraging each deep stroke.

“Fuuuuuccccckkkk.” He jerked inside her, his seed warming her body.

He collapsed on top of her, panting. Only for a moment, though. He spread her legs wider, opened her lips, and licked her clit in fast, hot strokes. Goose bumps traveled along her nerve endings. She screamed and trembled. Held his head in place and rolled against his tongue, coming so hard her eyes rolled back in her head and she thought she might faint.

Before she fully recovered, he joined with her again, fucking her hard. Almost angrily.

“I ain’t fucked no other bitch, Megan.”

This time when she slapped him, he caught her hands and drilled her without mercy. Just as she wanted it. And, this time, when they came, it was together.

Ten minutes later, Christopher was in the shower and Meggie was putting on her robe to go down and make coffee. She grabbed her phone and saw the alert for Grant’s text. She opened it.

Grant: Hey, Uncle Christopher.

Meggie frowned. He thought he was texting Christopher? That made little sense.

Grant: I’ll ask Reb out just as we planned. I promise I’ll do a better job with this mission than we did with Torie. I think it’ll help that we’ve all contributed ideas on how best to move forward. I can see why the boys are so stoked by another secret mission for the club. It’s fun. Aunt Meggie and Rebel will never be the wiser. And neither will Roxy. She’d fuck me up. See you at the hospital.