Chapter 8

Varkaan

I was returning home empty-handed.

This had never happened before, and I thought it fooking telling that I wasn't even concerned about the shame.

Ten days. Ten days ago I'd dropped Roxanna in the village and, ignoring her scowls, retreated to the solitude of my hunt, because I knew there was no way I could stand to breathe her scent and see the challenge in her blue eyes…without claiming her.

Mine .

I'd said that, but I couldn't fulfill my vow. Because she was my brother's prisoner, and he surely had plans for her. Leaving was the hardest fooking thing I'd ever done .

Which meant that for the last ten days, I'd been distracted.

I hope that's obviously an understatement?

I'd grown up in these forests and glens. I knew the animal trails, I knew their habits. I knew where the plarkets nested and where the wulfs hunted and where to lay in wait for the mighty bkarns with my heavy bow.

But every single bit of that knowledge had failed me.

I'd spent ten days scoring naught more substantial than mallent for my own dinners, crouched in downpours, stumbling through pine groves, getting stuck in briars… Because I was distracted.

My thoughts weren't my own. My body wasn't my own. My Kteer had my blood pounding uselessly through my limbs, and I frequently felt like tearing my kilt off and running, roaring off a cliff.

I wasn't certain what that would prove, so I did my best to ignore the urges.

I led my horse back into the village, ignoring the stares from my family and friends. I told myself ‘twas because they'd never seen me return home empty-handed, and that explained the whispering.

When I dropped the animal at the stable, I found myself glaring at the lad assigned to its care, and clamped down so tightly I heard my jaw creak. I needed to get out of here.

Nay, ye've been out of here for days and it didnae help.

Well, what would help?

Seeing Roxanna .

My subconscious wasn't helping.

"Torvor's Hammer, Varkaan, what's wrong with ye?"

I whirled about to see my grinning older brother bearing down on me.

Well of course he was grinning; ‘twas the night after the new moon, which means last night he claimed his Mate in front of the village. And had probably spent the subsequent hours pleasuring her up one side of his cottage and down the other.

I scowled.

Drakolt's hand fell heavy on my shoulder and he peered into my eyes. "Are ye ill, lad?"

"Dinnae call me that," I grumbled, shrugging off his touch. "Is Korvak back?"

"Nay," the chief replied cheerfully, falling into step with me as I stalked toward my empty cottage. " He followed my instructions, at least. Sorcha and I returned yesterday to learn ye dropped off yer human and fled. "

I whirled on him to growl I hadn't fled , but what came out was, "Roxanna isnae mine ."

My brother reared back, studying my expression.

I curled my hands into fists, claws digging into my palm, glad for the pain. What in all the hells was wrong with me? I was ready to yank my brother's head off just for being happy? My heart was pounding in my chest, my breathing was ragged.

Mayhap I was ill.

"Are ye certain?" Drakolt finally asked.

What was he talking about? "Certain about what?"

"That Roxanna isnae yers?"

Fook .

Groaning, I spun about and stomped away.

"Varkaan!" he called, and I could hear him pounding after me. "Stop!"

I didn't, and when his hand closed around my arm, I did whirl back on him with a snarl.

"Cease yer pestering!"

Drakolt didn't release me, and instead studied me with a serious expression. "Yer eyes are green."

"Aye! Because I'm angry!"

"About what? About Roxanna?"

Just hearing her name on another male's lips made my Kteer howl in rage. "I'll no' stay in the village with her, brother." The ultimatum slipped out before I could think clearly. "Decide yer plans for her and implement them."

His brows rose. "Ye hate her that much?"

I love her . I bit my tongue to hide the words and tasted blood.

Drakolt sighed and shook his head but didn't release me. "I had nae plans for her or her little cousin, brother. They werenae supposed to come with us, and I've been a little distracted this last fortnight."

Fooking his new Mate.

I scowled.

My brother tipped his head to one side. "Still, if ye hate Roxanna so much, I will speak with Sorcha about options. We can send her through the stones next full moon—"

The thought of her returning to the human world wrenched a " Nay !" from my lips. When Drakolt raised a brow, waiting for me to say more, I tried to calm my breathing.

"Nay," I repeated, though I knew my tone was still harsh. Then I shook my head and contradicted myself. "Aye. If she wants to go, she should have that freedom. But ye… "

"I have nae plans for her, Varkaan," my brother repeated quietly, studying me. "What do ye want her to do?"

I had to look away, unable to bear the kindness and pity in his expression.

Unfortunately, my gaze landed on my cottage. Cozy, comfortable. Empty.

I imagined what ‘twould be like to return from a hunt and be greeted by a female who cared for me. Who cared about me. A female whom I loved.

"I want her to stay," I whispered, not realizing what I was going to say until after I said it.

"And will ye stay as well?" Drakolt asked.

I turned a tortured gaze his way and my older brother nodded solemnly. "If she is yer Mate, brother, then ye have my blessing to make a future with her in the village. The clan will welcome her, and Sorcha will be glad."

If I let myself focus on that happy future, I might cry.

"She doesnae want me," I snapped. "She keeps trying to run, to return to her people."

"Really?" My chief's brows rose. "Because I've heard a verra different story from Gelma. Our grandmother says Roxanna has been content these last days, living and working with her. She's made nae move to run."

That…made no sense.

I blinked at my brother, trying to understand his words.

Slowly, Drakolt's lips curled into a grin, his tusks gleaming in the sunshine. "Do ye remember the ancient tradition of the Mate Hunt?"

Numbly, I shook my head, and my brother—still grinning at my expense—folded his arms across his chest.

"Gelma explained it once when I was young. There used to be a tradition where a Mated female would run into the wilderness and the male, in order to claim her as his, would have to track her down and mark her."

"Mark her?" I murmured, my mind already buzzing with possibilities.

"Bite her," Drakolt said simply, rocking back on his heels. "Plant his seed in her, make her his."

The thought was so perfect it almost made me groan aloud.

Mayhap my brother guessed, because he suddenly chuckled and one hand shot out to slap me on my shoulder. "Mayhap ‘tis all ye need, Varkaan. A Mate Hunt. "

"Ah, lads, there ye are."

Drakolt turned to face the new voice—Gelma, hobbling up to us—but I was still staring into the distance, contemplating his words and the possibilities. Is that what Roxanna had been doing, without realizing it? Did she feel the same connection to me that I did to her?

"I'm glad to see ye home, Varkaan," she was saying, poking me with one of her impossibly long fingers. "And I ken someone else who would be, were she here."

My brother snorted. "If ye're speaking of Roxanna, we were just discussing her."

"Good." Gelma folded both her hands atop her walking stick, and I focused long enough to see the sparkle of humor in her eyes. "Because Varkaan needs to attend her."

"Aye," I rasped. "Where is she?"

My grandmother shrugged. "I dinnae ken."

Drakolt gaped. "Ye lost a human, Gelma?"

But the old woman was still smirking at me. "Och, nay, I dinnae lose her. She ran away."

"What?" I barked.

"Early this morning." The little female nodded. "Without her shoes, silly thing. Took off into the woods to the north, I believe."

I gaped. "Roxanna ran ? From me?"

My brother clicked his tongue. " For ye, I think ye'll find."

Inside my chest, my Kteer began to thump madly, a wild thing desperate to escape its cage. My firebrand ran…so that I might hunt her?

"Aye, Varkaan." My grandmother slowly lifted one hand and pointed a knobby finger to the north. "Yer Mate is waiting for ye to find her."

My claws grew. My tusks felt heavier, stronger. The primal instincts rose within me as my Kteer howled in joy. Already I was sniffing the air, hunting for her scent.

Vaguely I heard my chief chuckle. "Aye, brother. Go. Hunt yer Mate."

I was only too happy to obey.