Chapter 26

CHAPTER 26

KAYDEN

DECEMBER

T he cold was bitter. Not the weather. I meant Maddox.

Ever since that blowjob in the library, he was walking around in a piss-poor mood. Not sure why. After all, he was the one who came. He should've been smiling for weeks, right? I know I was. I'd never thought giving head would be such a rush, but it was.

Until Maddox's bad attitude soured mine.

He barely spoke to me the rest of that evening, and Dane and Jackson watched us with concern. I waved it off, and when Dane asked me about it the next day, I said that Maddox and I had another disagreement. We didn't. The total opposite. Maddox wanted to keep our fucking around on the down low, and that was fine by me. So why was he so cranky? Or maybe I was thinking way too much about his reaction. He was, after all, a self-proclaimed grump. Maybe after the orgasm, he reverted to his usual mode.

Still, I assumed things between us were different. That he wasn't just my new fuck buddy, but my friend. Now, I wasn't so sure we were anything. I thought we'd finally reached a point of understanding between us, and then Maddox withdrew into himself. Not that I should be obsessed about him. I had more important things to focus on than my sex life. Days went by with no communication from Maddox. I found it unsettling, but what could I do?

So, instead of sitting beside Maddox on the drive down to Maryland, I sat beside Dane. At least he'd talk to me. Willingly.

"Where's your bestie?" Dane quipped.

"He's so far from that." I shook my head. "And he's at the back of the bus, as usual. Ignoring me. He's hot and cold, and either way, I always get burned."

"What are you talking about, Kay?" Dane whispered.

I couldn't help the fiery blush that heated my cheeks. "Not here."

"No shit. Your face gives everything away."

I playfully smacked his shoulder in retaliation.

Instead of sleeping the whole trip, I got out my notes and studied. My regular tutor had fired off a list of items for me to follow up on. He was alright, but I learned more in one session with Maddox than in several sessions with my school-assigned tutor.

After working for two hours, I grabbed a protein bar from my backpack, gulped down an energy drink, and went back at it. I didn't need the extra caffeine or stimulation, but I was nervous as fuck about this trip and this game. And about the rest of the semester, the courses that I was struggling with. Not to mention sharing a room with Maddox again.

I should have talked to Coach and told him that my personal feelings for Maddox required me to switch rooms. But I wasn't ready for the interrogation that would follow. And I'd have to actually define my feelings first, and that was scary as fuck. I'd never been so confused, consumed, or downright amused by anyone as I was with Maddox. I wanted to hug him really tight and not let go. Which was funny as fuck because he was so not the huggable type. I wanted him, for sure. Our chemistry was hot as fuck. But it was everything else that left me wondering what the hell I was doing. Still, I didn't notice or want anyone else. Only him.

Finally, after two hours of studying, my eyes grew heavy. I fell asleep and woke up to Dane nudging me with his elbow.

"We're here."

Here meaning the hotel. Which meant a shared room with Maddox. I went from sleepy to anxiety code red in less than ten seconds.

We lumbered off the bus, and entered the hotel. Maddox was on his phone, ignoring everyone. I turned to Dane and I didn't hold back my eye roll.

Once I had my hotel key card in hand, I headed for my room. I didn't look back for Maddox or wonder when—or if—he was following me. I just wanted to hit my mattress and sleep. But since I got to the room first, I was confronted by a problem. A big one.

Only one fucking bed. Was this a joke?

Picking up the hotel phone, I called the front desk.

"Hi, I'm in room 435, but there's been a mistake. We have a double room booked, not a king."

"Hold, please."

I paced in place while cheesy music played in my ear.

"Thank you for waiting. This is Jenna speaking. How can I assist you?"

"This is Kayden Melnyk in room 435. Sutton University room block. There's only one king bed in this room. Our requests are always two doubles."

"One moment," she replied. "Oh yes, I see that. But I'm sorry, we have a convention going on and we had to re-work the room scheduling. Some of your teammates are in the same situation."

"So, that's it? There's nothing you can do?"

"I'm sorry, but we're all booked up."

"Fuck!" I yelled out just as Maddox entered the room. When he spotted the bed, he dropped his bag. "I mean, sorry, uh, thanks for the info."

I hung up and shook my head. "Before you go ballistic, I just called the front desk, and there's nothing they can do. The entire hotel is fully booked."

Maddox shrugged and slipped off his leather jacket.

"Whatever. I'm too fucking tired to care. I'll take the right side."

Then he headed for the bathroom. Huh. As soon as the door closed, I called Dane.

"Hey, did you get stuck in a room with only one bed?" I asked.

"Uh, no. But Axel and Ethan did. So did Jace and Finn. And you?"

"Yes."

"Shit, bud, I'm sorry."

"It's a problem, Dane. But not for the reason you're thinking," I whispered. "Maddox and I have…you know…we kissed the night of that party. More than that. We got off, together, and it was the hottest fucking thing I've experienced in my life, and then in the library the other week I sucked him off and?—"

"Whoa, bud, slow down. One piece of shocking information at a time. Back up, I need details. About the kiss and everything else. I guess that porn site inspired you, eh?" Dane chuckled.

I slapped a hand over my head. "This isn't funny, D."

"And this happened weeks ago, but you're just telling me now? How long were you gonna keep this a secret?"

Dane sounded hurt. Which I didn't intend. I wanted to tell him, fuck did I want to tell him, but I also wanted to respect Maddox's privacy. And, I was still in shock that I'd had sex. Not just because it was with a guy. Just, sex in general.

"I almost didn't believe it happened. And it was good. No, not that. It was incredible. Better than I'd imagined and…well, we agreed not to tell anyone. It's just a casual thing anyway. It doesn't mean anything."

Yeah, right.

"I get you. You know I do, given what me and Jackson are going through," Dane replied. "But Jackson and I aren't on the same team. So, you better know what you're doing, Kay."

"I don't. That's the fucking problem."

"And now you're sharing the same bed?—"

"Exactly," I sighed.

"Well, as long as no one finds out, do what you want. But you gotta separate work from play or hockey from fucking. Nothing can interfere with our game, right?"

I dropped onto the bed. "Ugh."

"Can you?" Dane asked.

"Yes," I replied. "Of course. That's all it is."

I sounded confident. It was no problem.

"Or you could approach Coach for a room change," Dane offered.

"He'd insist on a reason why. And I'm not ready to go there. I'm fine. It's fine."

"I wish I could offer you advice. The only thing I can say is—" Dane paused. "Try to keep your voices down. The walls in hotels aren't soundproof."

"Not funny."

"Not joking."

"Dane," I started. "How did you, you know, know that what you felt for Jackson was more than sex?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line.

"Back in high school, when Jackson and I were fooling around in secret, I kept telling myself it was just hormones. But whenever I'd see him talking to another guy, it drove me crazy. I wondered if he was interested in them. I thought about him all the time. Wanted to be with him and only him. And he was the one I confided in. About everything."

I thought about the need I had to know all about Maddox. Was that just curiosity or did it mean more? I'd told him about my learning disorder and my ADHD. And it felt good to be open like that. To have someone finally see me. All of me.

"Thanks, Dane."

"Hey, you wouldn't be the first guy to fall for a teammate. Of that, I'm sure. But I'm not gonna lie, it does make me worry. About you, and the game."

"I know. And I can't afford to fuck up. I need this team."

"We sure as shit need you. Remember that."

The bathroom door opened, and Maddox stepped out.

"I gotta go," I muttered.

"See you in the morning."

I tapped end and threw my phone on the bed.

"You sure you're okay?" I asked Maddox. "Three months ago, you didn't even want to share a room with me, never mind a bed."

He threw his shirt off and started to undo his jeans. Uh, that was not the response I was anticipating. And him getting naked didn't help my poor, confused dick at all. Maddox didn't reply. He just pushed his jeans off and threw them on the bed. Clad in nothing but tight black briefs, he stared at me for a moment, then slid under the sheets.

I guess I got my answer.

Searching my backpack with sweaty hands, I grabbed my meds and a bottle of water, and downed my pills. Then I headed for the bathroom to wash up.

By the time I got back out, Maddox was already snoring.

Huh. So much for my worries. I wondered if this meant he was done. With me, and with sex. While I was still rocking a semi and trying to get my mind off being alone in bed with him, he was obviously not concerned. Or interested. My earlier fears turned to frustration. I stomped over to the left side of the bed and got in. But with Maddox close, almost naked, and smelling so fucking good, there was no way I was going to be able to sleep. And knowing that I didn't affect him the way he did me, I let out a sigh. A loud one.

I tossed and turned for God knows how long. Until Maddox's snoring ceased.

"Knock it off," he grumbled.

"I can't help it," I bit out. "I can't sleep."

"I thought I was on a ship with all the fucking movement going on."

"Excuse me for being wired," I replied. "I can't just tune everything off and fall asleep like you."

Maddox sighed and rolled over to face me. "I didn't sleep on the bus. I'm fucking exhausted."

Oh.

"Sorry," I muttered.

I rolled away, facing the window, and willed myself to relax. Right. I could hear Mad's every breath and I so wanted to turn over, pin him to the bed, and kiss the ever-loving shit out of him.

Then, I didn't have to. Maddox threw one leg and one arm over me.

What the fuck?

"Think of me as your weighted blanket. Now shut up and go to sleep. We both need it."

I could sacrifice sleep for sex, but he was right. We had a game tomorrow, and I wasn't going to turn down his offer. Or fuck up the game.

Closing my eyes, I listened to the sound of Maddox's slow, even breaths and soaked up the heavy weight of his body hugging mine. Soon, my eyes grew heavy.

And my dreams? He was right there, too.