10. Vale

Chapter 10

Vale

I f I had it my way, I'd live in the bathtub. The decadent water nearly reached my collarbones, encasing me in blissfully scalding heat. It lapped at the sides of the golden tub as I scrubbed my skin pink, the warmth easing the aches in my muscles and bones. The suds of the lemony soap popped and crackled against the water, and even that was a damn delight.

I couldn't recall a time I'd been so clean. I tried not to look at the state of the water beneath the layer of bubbles or feel the nagging whispers of guilt for experiencing something so wonderful when Nyrah couldn't. But since there was a definite possibility I could die in the next twenty-four hours, I figured enjoying it was a far better use of my time than wallowing.

Wallowing wouldn't do anything but make me feel like I didn't deserve this, and dammit, if I was about to break a curse and save a kingdom, I deserved a bath at the very least.

I hadn't forgotten the trials Xavier mentioned—even if he wouldn't tell me what they were. If all the Luxa had died during them, I would hang onto every single little good thing I could before they started. Dunking my head, I rinsed my hair of the blue hair potion that had appeared on the small wooden stool next to the tub. It carried a faint scent of flowers and something I couldn't place, the pleasant perfume another luxury I'd carry with me.

When I couldn't wash another body part and my fingers got all wrinkled and pale, I pulled myself from the water. Reaching for the same fluffy white cloth Xavier had used to wrap around his waist, I relished the soft glide of it as I dried my skin.

Under the mountain, such luxuries would be considered too good for the miners and lower class. The majority of us only had the frigid pools diverted from the stream to use for bathing. While they were an escape from the heat in the summer months, they were nearly unbearable in the winter. There were a few women who made soaps as well, but their supplies were always limited.

A cream confection of fabric hung over the privacy partition, the thin garment soft and silky as I ran my fingers over it.

"It's a nightgown," Kian said when I didn't grab it, his voice rough with an emotion I couldn't place. "I also have some underclothing as well. And a dress for tomorrow. And some other things I thought you might need."

I swallowed down the tears threatening to fall, covering my mouth so I wouldn't make a noise. Gifts were a new experience for me, and it made me thankful and angry and… confused. Kian and Xavier were dragons, and yet, I couldn't reconcile these men with what the Perder Lucem insisted they were. I couldn't imagine them murdering without cause or hurting innocents.

Even Kian, who had been a complete prick to me all day, had still not injured me in any way. Was that just because I was a Luxa? Was it because they needed me? And why did not knowing make me so crazed?

And how could I trust Arden at his word? This was the same man who'd beaten me, stabbed me, whipped me, tied me to a stake to have me burn. He'd made me pay for Nyrah's actions, even though she'd just been a hungry child. Why would he tell the truth? He and the rest of the guild were starving us, killing us…

It didn't make sense for me to punish Kian and Xavier for Arden's word.

"T-thank you," I choked out, trying not to let my emotions get the better of me. "That was kind of you."

Gently, I plucked the garments from the screen. One had to be the nightgown, but the other two confused me quite a bit. The first was a pair of briefs similar to bloomers, only silkier and smaller, and appeared to fit close to the skin. I'd never seen anything like them, but they didn't seem too complicated. I pulled the silky fabric up my legs, letting it rest against the bony protrusions of my hips.

The next garment was similar to a bustier, but I hadn't seen one since before my parents died. It had strings and fastenings, and it seemed like it would be terribly uncomfortable, so I left it alone. Then I slipped the nightgown over my head and shivered at the creamy texture of it. But the room, in spite of the fire, was slightly chilly, so I grabbed the fluffy robe hanging near the tub and slid my arms into it. The plush fabric was heavy and warm, as if magic had been keeping it ready for me. Maybe it had.

Tying the belt around my waist, I gathered myself enough to round the partition. Kian was still stitching Xavier's wounds, the last of them the shallowest of cuts. Still, his large, half-naked body made my belly dive for my knees. It didn't matter that I'd ridden with him all day, it was different when he'd stripped to the skin for his bath.

I'd never been around a single naked man, let alone a giant dragon shifter who'd saved my life. And then the way he'd cupped my face in his hands? I'd wanted to kiss him then, but I'd been too much of a coward to make that move.

"Am I clean enough to mash the berries?" I asked, holding up my hands for inspection. I'd said it as a joke, but the dirt was gone from under my fingernails and my skin was about three shades lighter.

Kian abandoned the needle and thread and took my hand in his. His touch was gentle as he looked my fingers over, turning my hand this way and that as if he was looking for the slightest hint of poison. There was nothing I could do about the raised callouses on my palms or the jagged scars on my knuckles from mining. I hated the hardness of them, but they were clean at least.

Then, as if he was giving his seal of approval, Kian bent his head, pressing his soft lips to the tender skin of the inside of my wrist, his kiss placed over the cut I'd given myself with his blade to set my power free. My whole body felt as if a flash fire had ignited along my spine, and I tried and failed to swallow down a gasp.

"You pass inspection," he rumbled, those burning amber eyes meeting mine as his breath gusted over my flesh.

Something about his voice sent a shiver through me, tightening my nipples and making my core clench. If he'd been pushing me away before, he'd definitely changed directions.

"Good," I managed to croak, pulling back my hand and spinning to face the berries.

Nightwinter berries were a small, pink fruit plucked from a night-blooming bush that only grew in the coldest, darkest of places. Naturally, they were everywhere under the mountain, popping up where blood had been spilled. I liked to think the earth was giving some of the lives lost back to us with the fruit, its only real purpose to help heal wounds.

Gently, I mashed the berries with my knuckles, careful not to be too rough. The sweet scent filled my nose, reminding me of Nyrah so much my heart twisted in my chest. She'd tended to me for days while my back healed, attacking my thick wounds with the paste as if it would take back what she'd done. And even though I'd taken her punishment, I'd never blamed her.

She would have died had I not.

Swallowing down the hurt, I spread the paste over the closed cuts on Xavier's back, managing to pretend to ignore both men as I worked. Even the unstitched cuts seemed to be healing faster than before, and I hated that Kian was right about the bath. I had been the reason Xavier was hurt, and the guilt made a home for itself in my middle.

Naturally, my belly took that moment to make my hunger known, grumbling a plaintive yowl that spoke of an entire day without food.

Kian's brow rose as he stared at my middle, a faint smile tipping up the side of his mouth. "And I thought only dragons could roar that loud."

A blush heated my face, and I ducked my head as a fair amount of shame twisted my insides. Xavier elbowed him in the gut as a knock sounded at the door. Kian let out a pained " oof ," and Xavier rose from the edge of the bed, opening the door to the innkeeper.

A heavily laden tray was in his arms, the precarious balance of the items both tantalizing with their aromas as they were frightening. The sheer thought of losing any of the food had my heart tripping in my chest.

Before it could meet a horrible fate, Xavier saved the day, scooping up the tray as it tipped and depositing it on the small side table beside the fire. I was sure words were said, but I could only stare at the huge hunks of bread and giant bowls of creamy broth with thick curls of steam wafting up from the surface. A hand on my shoulder had me nearly jumping out of my skin as my stomach twisted into hungry knots.

I couldn't remember the last time I'd had anything other than the brick-like rations from the guild—the ones that tasted of dirt and half-spoiled vegetables that likely were the scraps from the leadership's tables.

"Have a seat," Xavier rumbled, the low words almost a command.

But my body didn't so much as twitch as I stared at the feast, afraid that if I moved, I would dive for the tray like the starving woman I was. It wasn't until I was gently but firmly pushed into the chair and Kian handed me the bread that I started devouring the food.

There was no such thing as manners or etiquette. I ripped into the bread with my teeth, the buttery, flakey crust zinging my tastebuds with flavor. I was almost positive I moaned, and I couldn't have cared less. Then, there was the soft, chewy center, and my toes practically curled as I swallowed it down.

Xavier knelt at my side, handing me the bowl of soup, and I fought off the urge to snatch it from him. Taking the bowl with both hands, I relished the heat filtering into my palms for half a second before I drank deep. I knew I moaned then, the savory liquid even better than the bread. It warmed me from the inside out, and I gulped down the broth until there was none left, my belly filled near to bursting.

I couldn't recall the last time I'd been full, the unfamiliar sensation almost uncomfortable but welcome all the same. I stared at the other plates full of braised meat and multicolored vegetables, but I knew if I ate another bite, I would lose it all over the floor. When was the last time I'd eaten meat?

Ten years?

Fifteen?

It had been as a child when we still had hunters in the guild instead of just miners. Back when we had acres of terraced farmland to tend and raised animals for food. It took nearly everything I had not to stuff myself, to not to gorge on the offered decadence. Not to hoard the leftovers just in case I never got food again.

"When was the last time you ate?" Kian asked, his voice no louder than a whisper, but his tone had my head whipping up to look him in the eye.

As soon as I met his amber gaze, I almost wished I hadn't. It was filled with enough knowing that a thread of shame tugged at the small cocoon of comfort I'd managed to wrap myself in.

"I don't know," I admitted, unwilling to lie to him. "It's been a while. And even when we do eat, it's not much."

I thought about the quarter ration that had spurred my trip to the kitchens and set everything into motion. Had we been given the whole ration that day, I doubted I would have pushed the issue. We'd likely still be under the mountain now. Then again, Thane wasn't someone who would let a slight slide, and Nyrah had refused him publicly. I'd likely be right where I was, worrying for Nyrah and wondering how I'd get us out of this.

Kian's large hand closed over my wrist, the joint emaciated from lack of nutrients and too many hours hammering away at the side of the mountain, mining for Lumentium . "I can see that. Did they not feed you?"

My chuckle was mirthless as I pulled my wrist from his loose grip. "Not if they could help it."

Xavier's touch on my ankle had me flinching, but that didn't stop the big man from pulling my battered feet into his lap so he could inspect the bottoms. I tried to tuck them back, but his grip was much firmer than Kian's had been. He held out a hand, and Kian passed him the bowl of leftover Nightwinter berries.

"You don't heal as quickly as we do. I'll need to bind these cuts."

"It's fine. I don't?—"

"Could you just let me?" he growled, ire making his eyes glow with what I assumed was his dragon.

But it had been a long time since someone had truly taken care of me, and I wasn't used to it.

"If you must," I grumbled, allowing him to inspect my feet.

At the first touch of the paste, I hissed, the healing properties of the fruit working its way into the cuts. It wasn't the first time I'd gone without shoes, so I wasn't worried about the state of my feet, but Xavier was. His brow pulled into a frown as he clucked his tongue.

"Some of these could use stitches, but?—"

"No stitches." Stitches meant the skin pulling as I walked and popping into a bigger wound if I ran. I'd take a scar over not being able to run if I needed to. "Just bandage them if you have to."

Xavier's jaw hardened, his gaze seeming to see right through my skin to the heart of my soul. It was as if he knew why I didn't want them, and he was trying to decide whether or not he would listen to me. His warm touch skimmed my ankle as he loosened his hold, but he said nothing.

"Do what she asks, brother," Kian murmured, handing him a roll of cloth.

Xavier didn't move to take it, instead he looked at me for one long moment, seeming to come to a decision about something. Only then did he pluck the offered roll, and soon, my soles were expertly bandaged, his tender care nearly bringing tears to my eyes.

"I wish I could have healed you," he whispered as he finished, and my hand instinctively went to my middle, resting over the thick scar from Arden's blade.

"I think you healed me just fine." I swallowed, the day taking its toll as another thread of guilt piled on my shoulders. "I'm sorry I didn't say thank you before—to both of you. I would have died up there had you not saved me." But meeting their gazes was too hard, and my eyes fell to my hands in my lap. "I know I'm just a job to you, but I still appreciate it."

Kian huffed out a mirthless laugh as he turned away, but the heat of Xavier's gaze never left my face, those pale-blue eyes always seeming to see right through me. Still, the weight of the day hit me in earnest, and his gaze fell away, releasing me from the hold they'd had on me all damn day.

Exhaustion tugged at every limb as I pulled my feet from his hold and curled deeper into the chair, tucking the robe around my legs as my eyes slowly drooped and then closed. The cushions were thicker than the thin mat of blankets my sister and I usually slept on, and even though the position was slightly awkward, I could still rest comfortably there.

I was nearly fast asleep before thick arms plucked me from the cushions. My eyelids barely cracked as I caught Kian lifting me into his arms and walking the short distance to the bed. He gently deposited me onto the mattress, and plush blankets and softness stole the rest of my energy.

"If you think I'm going to let you curl up in a chair when there is a perfectly good bed available, you're dreaming."

I wanted to argue, but I didn't even have the energy to part my lips in anything other than a sigh of contentment.

"Sleep well, little witch. Tomorrow will come soon enough."

And even though tomorrow would likely hold more than I could handle, I had a full belly, a soft, comfortable mattress cushioning my aching bones, and a nice firm pillow under my cheek. And that said nothing of the safety that settled over me like the blanket Kian tucked around my shoulders.

No one would get me with Kian and Xavier here, no one could touch me. For the first time since my parents died, I was safe.

With no more fight left in me, I gave in, allowing sleep to have me.

"Yes," a familiar voice rumbled in the deep recesses of my consciousness. "Sleep well, my brave one. I'll see you soon."