Chapter Five

Carmen

There's no bouncer at the front door, but there's a woman behind a cage. Not like an animal cage, but a casino cage… where you cash in your chips. She's older with a tight perm and she's dolling out condoms like lollipops.

"ID's please." We've shown our ID at the door, but apparently, we're showing them again.

She scans them over and stares toward us. "Are you two playing together?"

I glance toward Ruin, though I'm not sure why. Of course we're not playing together. We might not be playing at all, but still, it's instinctual to look toward him.

"No, we're not," I say. The excitement my tone had outdoors has been exchanged for nerves in this dimly lit setting.

"Okay. Are you playing at all, or do you want to be viewers only?"

I shrug, not looking at Ruin this time, though it's hard. "Both, maybe. Do I have to choose now?"

"No." She smiles. "I'll give you a green bracelet. This just lets people know what you're looking for. If you wear a black band, no one will bother you. Green means you're open."

"Have you been here before?" Her tone is cheerful like she's checking me into Disney World, not a sex club.

"First time." I exhale as Ruin stiffens behind me. "Am I reading your sign right? You have a virgin tag?"

She nods. "Oh yeah. You have no idea the kind of attention a virgin will get in a place like this. We get a lot of girls coming to ‘give themselvesaway,' so to speak."

Ruin pushes my arm as though he's warning me not to take the virgin tag.

"How do you even prove something like that?" he groans.

The woman smiles. "We don't. It's kind of a trust-based thing, but believe me, the people know. That viewing room fills fast. Everyone likes to watch a girl get her cherry popped." She looks toward me. "Can I get you a tag, or—"

I resist from turning back for Ruin's approval. He's my brother's best friend. Apparently, I'm not in the running. We're just two people who have a connection. We might be friends, but nothing else. I grip the necklace he gave me for my birthday and nod toward the woman.

"Yeah. I'm a virgin, so… I'd like the virgin tag."

I hear Ruin's teeth grind behind me and I swear I hear his knuckles pop. The woman straps a pink bracelet around my wrist and then questions Ruin before strapping him with black.

I'm glad he's not playing, but I'm a little nervous about going in pink. Maybe I made the wrong decision. Judging by the stone appearance on Ruin's face, I'm thinking I did.

The building is wide and spread in all different directions. We should probably stop and look at the map that's posted by the door but the whole thing is overwhelming, so we keep walking.

The décor is trendy with dark colors, lots of texture, and a ton of uplighting. The place reminds me of a speakeasy I was at once in North Carolina.

"You sure you want to do this?" Ruin growls. "It's weird. Really fucking weird."

I laugh and tap his chest playfully. It was me who so desperately needed the adventure, so I can't chicken out now. "It's gonna be fun. You'll see." His chest is warm and beating wildly. I want to sink into his hand and find comfort there, but I hold the necklace he gave me instead. "Thanks for coming with me tonight. I know this isn't your thing, but I really needed this."

He nods and swallows hard before glancing in both directions. "Where do we go first?"

"What's a party room?" I ask, reading off the signs. "I could use a snack and a drink. Do you think that's what's there?"

He laughs. "Nope. I don't think you're gonna find the snack you want there. You probably want the bar." He nods toward a separate corridor to the right where a sign points toward a bar.

"Yes. A bar would be good."

This is weird. Women keep walking past and staring. Not at me. They're all staring at him. They drag their gaze up and down his frame like they're famished. When they see his black bracelet, they snicker to themselves and keep walking.

I wonder if he notices them, and if he wishes he'd worn green now.

We're nearly to the bar when a woman with long blonde hair and a butterfly tattoo stops us. She's gorgeous. Like incredibly, stop you in your tracks gorgeous. The kind of gorgeous that's usually reserved for TV so you can wonder if it's real or airbrushing. Well, here she is and I'm pretty sure she hasn't been airbrushed.

My stomach turns. I'm the one with the virgin ticket. Where are all these men I was promised?

"Hey." She touches Ruin's chest.

My heart sinks lower.

"You're cute. You been to the viewing rooms yet?"

He shakes his head. "Not here for that."

She smirks and stands in front of him like he's going to change his mind.

I know I walked in here confident that Ruin and I had no shot together, but right here, in this moment, with this woman on the prowl, I can feel a deep rage burning my skin. Fuck these green, pink, black, whatever bands. Mine might as well be red because if she keeps talking, I'm going to cut a bitch.

I tuck into Ruin's hand and drag him toward the bar. "He said no."

Apparently, this is hilarious to her. "Well then, message received, you tiny protector."

As we reach the bar, I can feel my breath struggling to keep up with my pounding heart. "Ugh, that was so rude. You said no. I mean…" My face is warm. I hope I'm not as red as I feel.

"It was. I do have a question, though. It looks like that's how we're solving our problems then, right? I can just drag you away, no questions asked?"

I widen my gaze and nod. "Yeah, I mean… if I say no and some dude isn't listening. That's why I brought you here."

He looks down and grins. "For what it's worth, she wasn't my type."

"Easy pussy? Of course! I know how much you hate that."

"I'm glad you know me so well." He smiles the widest smile he has since we walked in. He looks down at me and says, "Apparently, I like my pussy running in the opposite direction. It's the only thing that turns me on anymore."

I guess I don't turn him on then, because given the opportunity, I'd be the easiest pussy he's ever had.

I laugh under my breath and turn into the bar, taking note of the details in the décor. The space is definitely a bar, but it's decorated like a library. Bookshelves surround the space and green lamps adorn small tables. The bar is set in the back with a walnut counter and mirrored shelving, like an old saloon.

"What can I do ya for?" the man behind the counter asks. "I've got Panty Dropper shots on special tonight. Course I can make you anything else you like, too."

I glance toward Ruin with a smirk, then back toward the bartender. "I'm sorry. What's a Panty Dropper shot?"

"Oh." The man smiles. "Coconut rum, gin, vodka, peach schnapps, pineapple juice, cranberry juice, and triple sec. Sound good?"

I nod. "Actually, it does."

Ruin requests a whiskey on the rocks and the slender man mixes our drinks behind the bar.

"So, where should we go first?"

"Umm… I'm thinking we start with—"

"Sorry to interrupt," a man says from beside us. I'd guess he's in his mid-thirties. He's got dark black hair, a shortly cut beard, and he's wearing a business suit. "I couldn't help but notice your pink band. Are you planning on going to room C? The show starts in five minutes."

My brows narrow. "Show?"

He nods. "There's a deflowering tonight."

"Deflowering?" I try not to laugh. "That's a very ‘culty' way to say someone is fucking a virgin."

The bartender sets our drinks on the bar, and I reach back for mine. I have a feeling I'm going to need it.

The businessman holds out his hand and I feel Ruin tensing behind me. I drag in a breath and reach out. His hands are soft and a harsh difference from Ruin's. "I'm Carmen."

"Pete," the man says. "They're looking for more participants tonight, if you're interested. There's a sign up on the app." He flips his phone toward me to show me the screen. "I'm in there and…"

"She heard you," Ruin growls behind me.

The man nods and walks past the both of us out of the bar. I'm not mad about him leaving. In fact, I'm glad he left. He was kind of creepy.

I turn back toward Ruin. "That dude was weird."

"Yeah, and you're not going to the virgin room."

I narrow my gaze. "What?"

"You're not going." His jaw is tense, and his nostrils are flaring.

"Why? We came all this way. I want to see what it's about. This is the adventure, remember? If I don't go out of my comfort zone, I didn't do the adventuring."

He huffs out a heavy sigh and rolls his neck in a circle.

"You okay?"

"I'm great." He shakes his head, trying to hide his gritting teeth. "Simply awesome. I love this."

"Really? Come on. We're here to be crazy."

"You're here to be crazy. I'm here to make sure you don't go so crazy you hurt yourself."

I've only had a few sips of the Panty Dropper, but it's enough liquid courage that I tuck my hand into his. At first, it feels innocent sliding against his sandpaper skin. When he groans, it feels like more.

His fingers cup around mine, and for a second, I wonder if he wants my hand against his. "We can watch in this room, but that's it. No playing yet. Understood?" His tone is demanding. It's more demanding than it's ever been with me.

I really like it.

"I can't promise anything. I came here to lose my virginity. I—"

"You didn't tell me that."

I gasp. "I did, like a million times."

"No. You said you might play. That's different than knowing you're coming to lose your…" He groans. "God damn it."

"If this bothers you, you can wait outside. I don't… what's happening right now?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're like… mad. Why are you mad?"

"I'm not. Come on." He holds my hand in his and leads me out of the bar toward the viewing rooms at the end of the opposite hall.

Clearly, he's upset, but I can't figure why. I'd like to believe that he's reacting like this because he's jealous, but I'm sure it's probably some weird thing about the guilt he's feeling for bringing me here because of his relationship with Outlaw.

"Room C still has space. Can't be that great," he groans, pulling open the door to the viewing room.

Inside, chairs sit three rows deep staring at a bedroom with a glass panel. The room is decorated like an actual room with a bed, dresser, ensuite, and bedroom door. There are even small touches like a cozy comforter, and little trinkets from the Eiffel Tower that add to the realism of the space.

A girl my age sits on the edge of the bed as an older man walks closer. The guy is big, muscular, dark featured, and covered in tattoos. He reminds me of Ruin, but not as handsome.

My heart slams against my chest, and though I know I'm supposed to be enjoying the show, I can't help but side-eye Ruin. I want to know what he's thinking and if this turns him on. I want to see his cock get hard.

The man lifts off the woman's dress and leans into her throat, biting her shoulder playfully.

As she moans, we can all hear her. Her voice is over the speaker.

The man on the opposite of me leans into my ear. "You want a turn next?"

No, is on the tip of my tongue, but it doesn't get a chance to enter the universe because Ruin's fist is smashing into the man's jaw before I can reply.

I gasp and stand to say something, but Ruin lifts me from the ground and tosses me over his shoulder before I can speak.

A few brave souls stand to stop him as we leave, but he pushes them down with no regard for where he's going or what we're doing.

Turns out there isn't as much security at this place as they claim because no one does much to stop the giant man from hauling me away, though knowing how Ruin's face has looked all night, I can't say I blame them.

"What are you doing?" I ask plainly. There's no use in kicking and screaming. I couldn't change his mind right now if I wanted to.

"We're leaving," he growls.

"Yeah, I see that, but why? We just got here. Nothing happened."

He pushes open the front door and hauls me through before setting me down outside. The cool breeze feels nice cycling through my lungs. "Thank fucking god nothing happened, Peach. What the fuck? I can't believe I let you talk me into this."

"Ruin… seriously, what's going on?" I can't figure why a man who's lived on the edge his whole life is suddenly filled with a sense of modesty.

He kicks his boot against the cement and paces back and forth for a long moment before hauling me up onto his shoulders again. I see it coming this time, but even knowing his plan, I couldn't stop him if I wanted to.

When we're finally at the truck, he settles me inside, and buckles me up. I'm not sure if this is for safety or because he doesn't want me to get away. I'm guessing the latter as he closes the truck door with a lot more force than he had earlier.

As he rounds the truck and climbs in the driver's seat, he lets out a gruff grunt, starts the engine, and peels out of the parking lot as though we've just stolen the crown jewels and we're running for our lives. I open my mouth to speak half a dozen times but close it again before anything comes out.

"I'm sorry," Ruin finally groans. "That was a lot."

"Why? It's my birthday."

"Yes, it is. I owe you one adventure, but that wasn't it."

I huff and cross my arms over my chest. "Tell me that wasn't personal."

He shakes his head, not bothering to look toward me. "What?"

"Tell me that wasn't personal. Did you haul me out of there because you have feelings for me, or was that about your allegiance to my brother?" It's a long shot, but I need to know. Between the compliments, the necklace, his hand in mine, the way he protects me, the way he listens to me, I need to hear him say something about his feelings. I have to know now! I'll take any litmus test that tells me the truth about this big, bad, biker I need so desperately… and I'm not letting up until I get my answer.