Chapter 24

CHAPTER 24

J asmine

Pleasure.

I’d always believed it was a short-lived feeling, a moment of sheer rapture that was fleeting. When it was gone, it was gone. But everything Braxton had told me had come to pass. Without being able to see what he’d been doing, I’d been fearful at first yet had instantly yielded to the pure but simple ecstasy.

Even now, just as the crazed climax began to sizzle, the sensations from the wax and ice to the remaining slight discomfort from the intimate pussy whipping left me quivering. I was a blubbering mess, unable to process a clear statement, let alone dare attempt to say anything that made any sense.

I longed to touch him, craved for his lips to drive me into another incredible moment of ecstasy. And I could swear he knew exactly what my mind and my body needed, tenderly pressing his lips against my earlobe. When he bit down, I wasn’t certain I even recognized my voice.

He was growling, the sound pushing even more barriers. I was so lightheaded yet full of energy. The combination was strange but exhilarating. As he peppered light kisses down my cheek, dragging his tongue around my lips, I found myself purring.

Every sweet moment was exaggerated as my needs intensified. He knew exactly what he was doing to me and what I needed, the how of which remained a mystery that I could only marvel at. The influx of electricity had shoved the ugliness aside, allowing me to experience the sheer joys of passion in an entirely different way.

While I continued stretching the rope, fighting to free myself, I really didn’t want to escape him. Why would I? He was chuckling darkly as he dragged his tongue around my right nipple, biting down before sucking.

The concept of pain and pleasure remained in the forefront of my mind. I could easily surrender to him forever. The thought should terrify me, but it didn’t.

“Please,” I found myself saying.

“Please what, little koala?” His voice was even huskier than normal.

Where my mouth and throat had been dry before, the moment I thought about having my lips wrapped around his thick cock, I was salivating. But the truth was that I needed him. All of him. It felt as if he was my drug and I’d pass out if he didn’t fill me with his thick shaft.

“You sure you want that, baby?”

Was the man teasing me? “Yes. Oh, God, yes.” I didn’t need to wait long, the feel of his body weight pressing against mine adding to the white-hot surge of electricity. Now my sense of scent was enticed more than it had been before, awake and alive as his exotic aftershave wafted into my nostrils. The man was truly masterful at creating passion, but no matter what he said, I doubted it had but so much to do with being trained by some unknown master dom.

He was taking his sweet time, which would normally be fine, but my inner core was throbbing. I couldn’t help myself, continuing to struggle in vain. The man was a master at tying rope, something that shouldn’t surprise me about him. I was arching my back, straining against my bindings as the feel of his cock pressing between my open thighs left me breathless.

His ability to tease me was as powerful as mine was with him. But I was starting to lose tiny parts of my mind with how much time he was taking.

“You will always be mine, little koala. No matter how far away you are, distance will never change that.” He rubbed the tip of his shaft up and down my pussy, which only brought out a series of scattered moans.

I wasn’t certain how to take what he’d just said. It was almost as if he was telling me when this was over, he’d let me go. Yet only in a few days, I’d started to feel uncertain about choosing not to have him in my life. He was more than just a savior. He was a lifeforce that I needed.

My chest felt heavy almost as if with sadness, and I had no idea as to why. When he finally eased just the tip of his shaft into my tight channel, I wrapped my legs around him. He didn’t admonish me or say a single word.

He allowed our bodies to become closer, the need spiraling out of control. The way he captured my lips forced me up from the bed. I could drink the man in for hours, increasing the rapture until we both couldn’t stand it any longer.

With our combined breathing so labored, even as he swept his tongue back and forth across mine, the sense of urgency was already interfering.

He raked his fingers down the side of my breast, jerking one leg into his arm and placing my calf over his shoulder. I felt so exposed, the inability to see anything pushing my boundaries more than before.

When he finally drove the entire length inside, I wasn’t just breathless and lightheaded. I was lost in the clouds.

“You are so beautiful.” When he issued the husky words, I felt beautiful, more so than I’d felt my entire life.

There was nothing like your own mother telling you that you weren’t pretty enough time and time again to shove you into a dark box. Ashton had told me it had been her way of coping with what did or didn’t happen when I was younger, but I didn’t buy it. She had booze to do that, doing her best to avoid the conversation both with the cops and my father.

Of course, neither one of them had believed me.

I shut off the memories, concentrating on what this wildly sexy man was doing and how he was making me feel. I hated to admit he was right, the blindfold alone something I could never have tolerated with another man, but with him, every act of darkness was exciting.

His thrusts became harder. Rougher. I loved every second as he stretched out my leg, pressing kisses against my skin.

The tingling vibrations of electricity continued and a few seconds later I felt another wave jetting through me. We were both taken off guard, his subtle laugh filtering into my ears.

“Oh. Oh. Oh. Uh. Uh. Uh.” The guttural sounds were the only coherent ones I could make. So what if I sounded like a wild animal? I wanted to laugh, but the pleasure was far too extreme. A single climax erupted into another and as I finally came down from the rafters, a moment of satisfaction and exhaustion settled in.

He wasn’t ready to come, pounding into me with all the ferocity of a lion. I wasn’t certain how I’d gotten so lucky to expose my inner vulnerability with a man like him. I also wasn’t entirely certain what had allowed me to feel comfortable enough to do so, but a raw burst of emotions flooded me and a single sob escaped my throat.

When he stopped moving altogether, I did what I could to encourage him by trying to arch my back. Every muscle was stretched, my mind blown at how emotional sex could be. It had never been before, likely because I’d hidden myself away for fear of feeling too much. I’d always felt as if by doing so, I’d not only acknowledge what had occurred in the darkness of my room but also in some crazy way approve it.

Even though I was wearing a mask, I cinched my eyes shut, doing everything I could to block out the tears that had already formed.

When he sucked in his breath, I sensed he knew anyway, no attempt at hiding my feelings successful around him. He continued fucking me, yet he was slower in his actions, more tender.

As if I would break.

His breathing finally drifted into being almost unrecognizable, which at least allowed a smile. The pleasure for both of us was all consuming and as his body started to jerk, I clamped down on my pussy muscles.

It was my little bit of control, something that always surprised me he’d allowed. He thrust five more times, his cock expanding more than before. When he finally erupted deep inside, there were no words to express, no sentiment at all.

As he slowly lowered my leg, wrapping his strong arms around me, I realized that for the first time in my life I had an angel; a dark one, but he was exactly what my heart and soul needed.

The waves were more intense than before, high tide allowing them to crash into the pylons holding the amazing structure of the villa from harm’s way. We were outside, enjoying the warmth and the incredible series of stars that seemed endless.

Braxton had started a fire in the firepit, the bottle of wine he’d opened after our incredible round of passion close to being finished. I had no idea what time it was nor did I care, but I had a feeling morning would dawn soon enough.

Perhaps we weren’t on a timetable of any type but after the strong work ethic I’d established as a teenager, being somewhat lazy in my thinking and my actions seemed far removed from the usual girl.

Then again, everything I’d experienced around him was. The realization wasn’t lost on me. After the sensory deprivation exercise, wine had seemed richer, food tastier, and the scents of the ocean and tropical foliage mixed with the exotic spices the man exuded had been almost as powerful as the hot sex.

Almost. We were on a round seat of some kind that was meant for two people. He’d even brought a blanket out, wrapping the soft material around both of us when I’d shivered.

Braxton had remained quiet, which was unlike him. We seemed more comfortable with each other, not needing to banter or to have him grill me about what I might know. It was so nice to be able to sit under the stars and ponder the world.

“It’s so beautiful here,” I half whispered as I pressed the back of my head against his shoulder. When we’d first met, I never would have believed him capable of enjoying something so simplistic. But here we were, happy and content with each other.

Maybe the relaxed feelings would prove to be a one-time situation but I knew whatever happened between us, I’d remember this time fondly.

“Yes, you are,” he muttered into my ear.

I jabbed my elbow into him. “I’m serious. Look at all the constellations.” I pointed to the sky.

“Pretty little spots of light.”

“Have you never looked up at the sky before?”

“Maybe when there’s an approaching storm.”

I jabbed him against for emphasis. “You’re incorrigible. I don’t buy it. Given our location and the lack of bright light, you can see things most people will never pay attention to their entire lives. See that one?”

“Which one?”

“Follow my finger and close one eye. Did you?”

He laughed. “Yes, ma’am.”

“That’s Ursa Major. Orion.” I cocked my head slightly. “See the one that kind of looks like a horse.”

“Maybe.”

“Relax your mind. That’s Centaurus.”

“Beautiful just like the woman finding them. I’m curious. How did you know so much about stars?”

I shrugged and felt a hit of sadness derived from my past. “When I was a little girl, after the first attack on our family, my father locked us all down. He installed security cameras everywhere, hired guards to stand watch and even had me home schooled for a length of time. I wasn’t allowed to do what I’d done before, going out with friends. There were no family dinners, not that they’d been a highlight since my parents usually fought. There were no school programs so after some whining and begging, my father bought me a telescope.”

“Wow. I didn’t know you were basically incarcerated.”

“Well, almost losing your life can do that. He was scared for all of us, one show of emotion I wasn’t used to. The other was his brief moment of acting like a father when setting up the instrument he’d purchased. He’d even bought a couple books on astronomy for me, explaining the solar system in a way no textbook had been before. I know this sounds odd, but it was the closest I’d felt to my father my entire life. Granted, it didn’t last but I cherished that and the memory.”

I felt his body tensing.

“He had his reasons for trying to keep us safe but weeks turned into months.” My words faded slightly and I was tired of hating my thoughts and memories of the past. “Anyway, I fell in love with the stars and have felt that way since. They were my tiny refuge, just seeing them allowing me erase some of the… bad things that happened.”

I should have known he wouldn’t allow what I’d just said to fade into nothing. Maybe I honestly wanted to share with him my darkest hour. That’s what trusting someone was all about. Right? With the exception of Ashton, no one knew my dark secret. I’d planned on keeping it that way.

His deep exhale was an indication I’d been right that he wouldn’t let it go. He wrapped his fingers around mine, pulling my hand to his lips.

I was already shivering slightly from being in his hold but the intimacy of what he was doing was more pronounced. “We all go through things in our lives that bring back bad memories.”

“I doubt you’ve ever had a nasty little issue your entire life. Unless you were arrested as a young man.” I tried to laugh but it sounded fake.

“Why, yes, I was. However, I was the idiot who was caught red-handed trying to steal a car.”

“You?” I lifted my head, still laughing especially since he was serious.

“Oh, yes. Of course my older brother put me up to it but that didn’t matter. I got the scared straight moment.”

“The what?”

“You know, when the cops slap you inside a jail cell with a couple huge men who were told to give me a hard time?”

“Did it work?”

“You bet,” he said, laughing. “My father didn’t need to dole out any further punishment. I couldn’t talk about what had happened for weeks.”

“They hurt you?”

“Let’s just say they let it be known what would happen to a pretty white boy if I ever landed in prison.”

“Ugh.” I nuzzled into him even closer. “I’m sorry.”

Together, we sat quietly but I sensed he was bursting out of his skin to know what happened.

“You father is a real piece of work.”

“Lured into a life he wanted but didn’t know what to do with.” My sigh was as exaggerated as his had been.

The silence over the next few seconds was far too quiet. I was pulled into the kind of darkness I’d tried to avoid, but it seemed opening up more than one can of worms had been inevitable.

“What happened? I could tell you went through something more traumatic than being bullied by two huge dudes.”

I knew he was trying to make me feel more comfortable and I adored him for it. I squeezed his hand, trying to find the courage left in me to say the words. It was even tougher than I’d originally thought. “There’s little to tell. I was the kind of young girl to jump off the walls I had so much energy. My parents were having a party and allowed me to consume my favorite treat. Ice cream. Little did I know they’d put sleeping pills in the ice cream.”

“What the fuck?”

“Well, it was an important event for both of them, the introduction of them into the upper echelon of society. My father had calculated every aspect of his career. No, I didn’t know that then. However, when I got older and had started snooping, I learned how important being in several important social circles had become.”

He remained quiet, which of course prompted me to continue. The pit in my stomach was intense but for once, it felt almost good to expose the darkness. “Anyway, the night of the party I understand a lot of alcohol had been consumed. The party got louder, music blaring and it kind of woke me up. It was dark, just the moon streaming in through the open blinds but…”

The way Braxton gripped my arm allowed me to continue.

“Anyway, someone was standing over me. A figure. A man. I thought at first it was my dad, but his breath was laced with something nasty. Then he put his hand over my mouth and…” The choke I’d tried to keep from releasing the demons I’d fought so hard to keep under control finally gave way like a dam with far too much pressure.

I sensed by the way he wrapped his arm around me I didn’t need to say a word to finish the story but I had to get through it. The one decent thing the psychiatrist had told me much later in life was that if I wanted to have a successful relationship, I’d need to face what happened by telling the person I cared about.

God help me, Braxton was someone I wanted with all my heart to fall desperately in love with. Was the concept nuts? Maybe, but people had become attracted to one another from far less.

“You don’t need to do this,” he growled.

“Yes, I do. The asshole can’t hurt me any longer. Not my body and not my mind. I refuse to allow it to happen. He touched me inappropriately, holding me down as he did so. The only good thing was that someone had interrupted us, preventing the asshole from finishing the horrible deed.”

“Who the fuck was it?”

“I don’t know and my parents didn’t push it. They told me it was just a nightmare and nothing more. I tried to believe them because as a kid, I wanted to, but it never left me. The nightmares, the visions. Finally, when I was back in school years later and I’d started acting up, I had a very nice counselor who listened and believed me. That started a whole issue with my parents and it wasn’t pretty.”

“Jesus. Fucking. Christ. I should kill the man.”

“You should understand that the scandal could have ruined his career. No, it’s something I can’t forgive him for, especially since my parents knew I wasn’t the kind of kid who lied. It took me until after I’d graduated to put it into perspective. They honestly didn’t believe anything had occurred.”

“I don’t care how you play this, what they did was reprehensible. You protect your family. My father wasn’t the most loving, but he would have scoured the ends of the earth to hunt and destroy anyone who hurt his kids in any way.”

“You were lucky. Maybe that’s why I never wanted a relationship, and the ones I had were always toxic.”

Braxton pressed his lips against the top of my forehead. “You will never need to endure that shit around me. We could have a dozen kids and I would watch out over all of them.”

While I knew his statement was heartfelt, it still surprised me. His conviction also brought me out of the darkness, as if finally the memory could fade away, locked in a dark box and buried where it belonged.

And what struck me was that I could see us having children together. Lots of them. The feeling was something I’d never experienced before but I knew it in my soul.

But more than that, more than the sun, moon, and stars, I knew I was falling in love with him. No tragedy, no monster could prevent that from happening.

I loved him.