Twenty-One

EVE

The worst part wasn't how Alihandro had left a gash on my neck, betraying my trust and humiliating me in front of everyone. It wasn't even how Shyllon had watched it happen with only a mild protest, giving me up easily to the king and his whims without a second thought.

No, what was worse was that the guards had thrown Ellis and me into a closed prison wagon.

Alone.

But we were still unable to talk freely. And unsaid words and promises burned between us hotter than a blazing inferno. Did he hate me doing what I did to survive? He could hardly fault me when we were both diving into royal beds for survival.

The tension surrounding us was as thick as a heavy cloak. The freezing night had descended, and so had my mood. I hoped Ellis wasn't cold. I had my fur cloak, but Ellis's tunic and breeches were much thinner.

I shivered, then told myself to knock it off. I'd been far, far colder and in much worse circumstances than I was now.

Risking a glance over my shoulder, I flinched at the hot, accusatory glare Ellis pinned on me.

"Stop being stubborn and come here," he grumbled at me, shuffling forward as best he could and opening his arms to me.

Incredibly relieved he didn't hate me, I relaxed into his chest as his warmth soaked through his tunic into my back. It wasn't much, but it was something.

"How is your neck? I'm sorry I couldn't get to you sooner. King Fennis delayed the more I pushed, and—" Ellis cut himself off as his fingers skimmed the angry marks on my neck. A sharp shock went through the wound and he drew back, spitting with pain. The heat left my back.

"That bastard! There's magick in there!"

The need to defend Alihandro rose in me, even though he'd turned out to be an ass in the end. My lips parted, but nothing came out.

Ellis sneered, shaking out his hand. "Go on. You're about to defend your rapist, aren't you? Oh, that's right. It wasn't rape. You were so very willing."

He turned his back to me and hugged his knees to chest.

So much for not hating me.

"That's rich. What did the king call you? His daughter's little plaything?" I snapped.

He didn't answer.

The cage rattled over a large hole, bumping me into the iron bars and throwing me against him. What were a few more bruises to my body compared to the one in my heart?

"I don't know what to do. It's all a mess." Ellis's agonized voice came out raggedly, but his arms were unable to help snaking around my waist as he turned and reached for me.

The deep ache in my heart burst open into a fully-fledged wound.

"It is," I whispered back, at a loss. I wanted to tell him I'd done it to survive, but that wasn't even true, was it? Not like Ellis, and I couldn't lie to him. Not after everything we'd been through together.

"I wanted it," I admitted quietly.

Ellis's shoulders tensed, then relaxed.

"I wanted it too in a weird, stupid way."

I shook my head. "It's not stupid. And Alihandro was kind to me. Do you know I can count on one hand the number of men who've been kind to me?" I asked him, my voice rising hysterically. "It isn't an excuse. Hell, it's not even a good reason. But it was all I had, and I wanted to, and just for a moment, it made me feel better—like the goddamn princess they all call me."

Tears snaked down my cheeks and I hurriedly wiped them away, frustrated.

"Fallon was kind to me as well—in her own way," Ellis offered.

I sighed. "Before Prince—before Shyllon took me away, they were going to hold me down and fuck me any way they could in a room full of people laughing at me. Gods, I couldn't even count how many there were. They shoved a mock crown of sticks and rocks on my head. They—" The full weight of what had almost happened hit me fully for the first time. Glancing up, Ellis had turned back toward me, his eyes wide and face full of horror.

I glanced at my hands, shaking as I held them out in front of me. Curling them into fists, I looked back up at him.

"Shyllon gave me medical aid when I first got here. He took me away from the pleasure house. Alihandro helped him, and he was the one who took the crown off and smashed it. And even if they ended up being asshole fae like the rest … Yeah. They were kind to me. Call it an even trade, I guess. Sorry it upsets you."

Because while I was sorry my actions hurt Ellis and his hurt me, I wasn't sorry for fucking Alihandro, and he hadn't apologized for fucking a fae princess. Not that I wanted him to. I didn't have time for regrets or second guesses. I had to make decisions and just decide they were the right ones. A person would drive themselves mad otherwise, always second guessing their choices.

Ellis's face lost its haunted expression, flattening out as he turned away from me. "The king has made a lot of promises. He's quite proud of his little army of bastards. Did you know he has no queen? He thinks I'm descended from his line somewhere along the way. Did you know that?"

I shook my head, even though Ellis was facing away from me and couldn't see it. The question was rhetorical.

"It makes sense. You'd all be descended from someone, obviously," I muttered, not truly seeing why it was so significant.

Ellis fell silent after that, the only sounds around us were the clattering of the wooden wheels over the cobblestones in the road as we bumped along. I shivered, and Ellis sighed, moving over and offering his chest to me again.

Gratefully, I snuggled into his warmth, so pathetically happy for any heat. I hated this fae realm. I hated the fae—Well, that wasn't true. I didn't hate Ellis. I didn't hate Shyllon, even though he hadn't stopped this from happening. I didn't even hate Alihandro.

Or Peri.

I must have drifted asleep against Ellis, because the next thing I knew, a loud bang jolted me, Ellis's arms coming around and gripping my shoulders automatically.

"Up and at ‘em." A man unlatched the cage door, sending it crashing against the ground. I stood slowly, trying to stretch out my cramped muscles. How long had I been out? Dawn was sneaking above the horizon, but I felt like I'd barely slept. At least the air was warming up as the golden rays of the sun peeked over the horizon, and I still had on my warm dress from Shyllon.

"Out."

I barely spared a glance for the human in front of me as I descended the ramp, Ellis right on my heels.

"Right. You won't be a problem, will you?"

I glanced up at the man, his gruff nature and flaming red hair reminding me so much of Ferar that I almost stumbled. He gestured surreptitiously to the fae guards stationed around the perimeter of the ugliest building I'd seen since coming here to the fae realm. It was flat and squat, painted a sickly white and gray color that reminded me of dirty dishwater.

One story high but spread out for at least a mile, the complex didn't have any fences or moats or anything else to keep its occupants inside. Then again, I bet they used magick. An image of the fae who'd chosen to burn himself to death rather than compete in the Royal Hunt filled my mind.

Magick, indeed.

"No, no problems," I assured the man vaguely, following behind him as the fae guards watched us through narrowed eyes. These guards wore silver armor with a violet shimmer, and thin bands of matching material that wove through their hair and around the crown of their heads like a headband. What protection did that give?

"Keeps the fae prisoners from using magick on them. The king's elite guards have them as well," Ellis whispered in my ear, nearly giving me a heart attack.

I nodded, my hand sneaking down to entwine in his. He stiffened for a moment, then grasped it tightly.

"I don't know who you pissed off, but no sense putting it off," our human deliverer commented dryly, grinning at Ellis with a particular viciousness.

The bandage Shyllon had put on my neck was hanging on for dear life, so I ripped it off and shoved the scrap of fabric down my chest.

The man's eyes followed my movement greedily until it saw the wound on my neck. His eyes widened, and he blinked a few times.

"The king sent us," Ellis bit out, drawing the man's attention back to him.

The man huffed. "Yeah, that would do it. Follow me."

He shot me another quizzical look, then led us between the fae guards and into the prison.